Read Lush Curves 6: Safe Harbor (A BBW Erotic Romance) Online
Authors: Delilah Fawkes
Lush Curves 6: Safe Harbor (A BBW Erotic Romance)
By Delilah Fawkes
Gavin
I couldn’t believe what was before my eyes, but there it was, as clear as bloody day—Aolani’s legs wrapped around my brother Malcolm’s waist
, right there in the gardens of the hotel, and him drooling over her like a mad dog.
My heartbeat hammered in my ears, my blood rushing until I couldn’t hear anything else. My stomach churned, and suddenly, I wondered if I might be sick. As if on their own, my legs carried me away from the scene before me, pounding out through the dark the way I’d come, away from the gut-wrenching view of the woman I loved slipping away from me and
straight into the arms of another.
My own fucking brother!
What the hell had happened? What had I done to drive her away? Just a few days ago we’d been inseparable, making love every night on the yacht, working together each day, enjoying one another in a way I didn’t think I’d ever feel again after Fiona’s death.
And now w
hat? Just as I’d vowed to tell her how I felt, to finally admit to her in front of God and everyone that I loved her and wanted to be with her, she betrayed me. She pushed me away as clearly as she possible could, using my brother as the vehicle.
And what would have happened if I hadn’t come upon them? Would Malcolm have buggered her right there in the goddamn garden? Right under my sodding nose?
The thought hit me like a wound, the pain of it almost dropping me to my knees. I couldn’t deal with this right now. I needed to get drunker than I’d ever been in my life, and then, in the light of day, maybe I could stand to think about what I’d just seen long enough to confront her.
To ask what I’d done. To ask why she’d done this to me.
I leaned over, my hands on my knees, and dry heaved, a flush of rage feeling foreign and utterly disgusting on my skin. I’d decided to risk my heart, and this is what I got. Broken down all over again.
This is what I got for betraying Fi.
Fucking
betrayed.
I should have bloody known.
“Gavin!”
Malcolm’s voice behind me. At the sound of it, rage boiled up inside of me, threatening to
spill over if I didn’t get away from him.
I waved him off and kept walking, not caring where I was going as long as it was away from him and away from the vision of them
together still blazing in my mind, burning me from the inside out.
“Gavin, wait,
” he called. “Stop, and let’s sort this out!”
His hand closed on my shoulder, and I turned, my eyes blazing, my anger right at the surface, my hair dangling in my eyes.
“What’s gotten into you?” Malcolm said. “I thought you said you weren’t with her? That you two weren’t together?”
I shrugged
his hand off and kept walking, not wanting to do or say something I’d regret.
Malcolm grabbed me again, and I whipped around, grabbing the front of his tuxedo shirt.
“Jesus Christ, Gavin,” Malcolm said.
“What do you want me to say?” I yelled. “I was a fucking
fool
for saying that. I just… God
dammit
…”
Malcolm paused for a moment, his eyes full of confusion and hurt. “Well, what the bloody hell did you expect
then? Are you saying you
are
with Aolani, but you refused to tell anyone?”
He shook me, and my knuckles whitened as I strengthened my grip
on his shirt. My other hand longed to strike out, to wipe that look of disgust off his face. Because, deep down, it mirrored my own thoughts. My own regrets. I was disgusted with myself. With him. With her.
With this whole god-awful
situation that I created in my foolishness.
“You had no right,” I spit out. “Why can’t you pass a woman without trying to bed her, eh? You fucking arsehole!”
I shoved him then, and he stumbled back, the shock on his face slowly morphing into anger.
“You should talk, Gavin,” he growled. “Aolani deserves better than someone who acts like he’s bloody
ashamed
of her.” He ran a hand through his hair, his manner suddenly swaggering. Challenging. “I can give her what she wants, brother. Can you?”
For a moment, everything went red, my vision narrowin
g to a point. Then, I heard yelling, felt a sharp jolt as my fist connected with bone, and everything came rushing back, color and sound roaring over me even as I heard my own voice bellowing in my ears.
Malcolm was holding his jaw, his eyes narrowed to dark sli
ts, and then his fist connected hard with my gut. I tensed in time, but it was still a hard enough blow to make me suck for air, tears stinging my eyes. I gritted my teeth and charged him, growling in fury, and we both hit the muddy grass in the garden, me falling on top of him, then rolling over and under as we grappled.
Stars burst before my eyes as he got a punch in, then I was on top, straddling him in the mud and hitting him again and again, dirt and blood from his broken nose splattering me.
“No!”
Aolani’s cry startled me, and I looked away just long enough for Malcolm to rear up and head-butt me, sending me tumbling off him. I gained my feet, staggering like a
drunk man, and squared off against him, fists raised at the ready.
“You’
re fucking mad!” Malcolm shouted at me, blood pouring down his chin and dripping onto his shirt, glowing in the moonlight. “You know that?”
“You stay away from her,” I growled, stabbing my finger at him. “You fucking
stay away
.”
“Stop!”
She screamed.
Aolani was a few feet away, her hands now covering her mouth, her eyes brimming with tears.
“God, stop it! You’ll kill somebody!”
“Let Aolani choose, brother,” Malcolm said, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.
“She’s mine, goddamn it,” I spat, unable to help myself. “You keep your bloody hands off her! Do you hear me?!”
My mind was nothing but a blur of rage and regret. Of anger and a fear so deep, I thought I might be drowning.
Was I losing her now? Losing her forever, just as I wanted to make her mine?
I raised my fists again, ready to beat my point home, when a firm hand closed on my arm.
“Gavin.”
I reared
back, trying to brush the hand away, not wanting to stop, unwilling to stop until Malcolm told me he’d stay far, far away. Until this night started over and Aolani was back in my arms.
I heard the scream as Aolani fell,
hitting on her side in the cold, muddy grass at the force of my push.
“Aolani! Oh, God…” I rushed to her, tried to pull her up, but she slapped my hand away.
“You don’t get to call me
yours
,” she said, her beautiful mouth now twisted in anger. “You don’t get to decide all of a sudden that I’m fucking
yours,
Gavin.”
She pushed herself to her feet and walked away, toward the lights and sounds of the hotel.
“I’m sick to death of the both of you!” She yelled over her shoulder. Her voice sounded choked with tears.
I moved to follow, but this time Malcolm held me back. And this time, I didn’t pull away. We both stood, bleeding and bruised, watching the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen walk away from us, hips swaying, gentle sobs floating back to us on the night breeze.
Jesus. I am such a fool.
“I’ve lost her,” I muttered, not realizing I spoke aloud.
Malcolm’s hand squeezed my shoulder. “You need to talk to me, Gavin. What on earth happened? What’s going on between you two?”
I shook my head, my heart shattering in my chest, as my brother slipped his arm around my shoulders.
Aolani…
***
Aolani
I booked my ticket home before I even took off my party dress, now smeared with grass stains from my fall. Then I packed my bags, stuffing the clothing Gavin had bought me in crumpled piles inside of the new luggage, and packing my old clothing in a small suitcase I’d brough along. I wrote a note on the hotel stationary for my boss, and then peeled off my soiled clothes and got in the shower.
The water washed over me, and I put my head back, letting the hot drops steal the tears from my eyes and swirl them away down the drain. I was tired of crying. Tired of feeling like crap. Tired of the emotional rollercoaster of trying to be with Gavin Fletcher.
Despite how much I still ached for him, despite how much I wanted everything to be okay and to just fall into his arms, and despite the opportunities I had working for such a powerful man, I knew what I had to do.
I had to leave.
I had to get away, back to somewhere I knew I’d be wanted. Where I’d be safe. As soon as I got home to my apartment, I was going back to Hawaii with my cousin Kali. Back to grandma’s house, and hopefully to a place where I could find a little peace of mind.
I just wanted to be myself again.
I wanted to be Aolani instead of this heartbroken shell I’d transformed into. I was no model. No lover. No exotic world traveler.
I was just Aolani, and I wanted to find that girl again.
I wanted to be okay. To be safe. To be home.
The flight I’d booked was a red eye, leaving in a few hours. I had
just enough time to make my preparations and get out. I lay down on my bed, wrapped in the hotel robe and covered my face with my hands.
I just hoped I was doing the right thing.
***
Gavin
Malcolm and I spent the night in the hotel bar, tucked into a
shadowy corner, nursing pints of dark beer and speaking in low voices about what had happened. We’d both cleaned up as best we could in the lobby bathroom, but we were a sorry looking pair—him sporting a broken nose and me a black eye that swelled like a bastard and made my vision blur.
“So,” Malcolm said. “Do you love her?”
I took a long draw from my beer and looked up slowly, wincing. “Aye. I do.”
“But you haven’t told her.”
I felt his stare before meeting his blue gaze. Sometimes I felt like this brother of mine could see right through me. Where Graham often kept to himself, something about Malcolm’s insistent stare always cut right to the heart of me. We understood one another, sometimes without even speaking.
“No.
I haven’t.”
He shook his head and drank, his expression saying what he didn’t need to. He and I both knew I was a fool.
“I’ve been a coward,” I said, running my hands through my hair. “God, Malcolm. What is bloody wrong with me?”
He narrowed his eyes at me, as if trying to read my mind. “This is about Fi, isn’t it?”
I sighed deeply, my chest aching at the thought. But strangely enough, the hole that had been in my heart for so long could no longer be filled by the memories of red curls on my pillow, and a lilting laugh caught up in the sea air. No, now it longed for the one I knew my heart belonged to. To Aolani Kahale, her dark eyes drawing me to her, her incredible heart keeping me close.
She was the one. It was amazing to me that I hadn’t seen it all along.
“I couldn’t let her go for so long. I promised, you know?”
Malcolm clapped a hand on my shoulder. “I know. I remember.”
The memory of him holding me as I wept, punching my leg with my fist, trying to wrap my head around the fact that my dearest was gone, gone forever to a place I couldn’t follow, welled up inside of me.
“I still have the ring. Aolani saw it.”
“And?”
“I…
I told her I couldn’t give her my heart. That I could never love her the way she wanted me to.”
There was a long silence between us. Then, Malcolm sat back and raised his eyebrows, letting out a long sigh.
“Jesus
Christ
, Gavin.”
I frowned at my brother and raised an eyebrow.
“Don’t give me that look. You
obviously
are mad about her and have for a while now. It’s written all over your face.”
I nodded slowly. How right he was.
I loved her so fiercely that it frightened me, but also exhilarated me in a way I’d never felt before. In that moment, I saw a future opening up before me, so bright it hurt to look at it. Hurt to think about. It was too good. Too beautiful.
I loved Aolani Kahale, and I wanted to be with her.
Needed
to be with her.