Luck of the Bodkins (36 page)

'Sound bloke,' agreed Reggie.

'He would have none of it. He made her disgorge. I thought it was pretty decent of him, and I told him so.
’

There was a pause. Monty screwed on the head of the Mickey Mouse, screwed it off once more, and began to screw it on again.

'But, dash it...' said Reggie.

‘
Well?
'

'What about you?' ‘
Me?'

'Yes. Why aren't you as bucked as dammit? What are you sitting there looking like that for, if you've got the thing back? Why no ringing cheers? Why no spring dances?'

Monty laughed a short, bitter, barking laugh.

'Oh, me? I've nothing to cheer about. Getting this mouse back doesn't make any difference to me. Everything's off.'

‘
Off?' The word shot from Reggie Tennyson's lips in a sharp gasp, as if he had received a blow in some tender spot. 'Everything's off?' His eyes dilated. If the expression meant what he supposed it to mean, it was the end of all things. Bim went his two thousand quid, and as for his dreams of becoming a well-known and popular member of Hollywood's young married set, he might as well abandon them right away. 'Everything's off?' he quavered pallidly, clutching for support at his chair. 'Not you and Gertrude?'

‘
Yes.'

'But why?'

Monty screwed off the head of the Mickey Mouse, screwed ·it on again, and began to screw it off once more.

'I'll tell you,' he said. 'When you fixed up that bally clever scheme of yours for my meeting the Blossom on the second-class promenade deck, you omitted to take into your calculations the fact that there was
a
second-class concert on tonight. You didn't know that Albert Peasemarch was singing at that concert and that he was going to ask Gertrude to come along and ginger up the applause...'

'My gosh!
And Gertrude turned up?'

'She did.'

'And found you with Lottie?'

'No. I got hold of Albert Peasemarch and told him to go and head Lottie off. So he went and did it, and shortly afterwards came gambolling up to me, as I stood talking to Gertrude, and saluted in
a
sailorly manner and said that it was all right -that he had seen Miss Blossom and told her that I couldn't get together with her then and that she had said that she quite understood and would I come to her state-room round about eleven.'

'What!'

‘
Yes.'

'My sainted aunt!' ‘
Yes.'

'What
a
dashed infernal idiot!
‘

'A trifle shortish on
savoir faire,
yes,' agreed Monty. 'The effect of these few words on Gertrude was a bit noticeable. You occasionally read in the paper about gas explosions in London streets which slay four. The whole thing was rather along those lines. I won't tell you exactly what she said, because I would prefer, if you don't mind, not to dwell upon it.

But you can take it from me that everything is off - finally, definitely, and absolutely.
’

Silence fell upon the state-room. Reggie sat clinging to the side of his chair. Monty screwed on the head of the Mickey Mouse, screwed it off again, and began to screw it on once more.

'I'm sorry,
’
said Reggie at length.

'Thanks,
’
said Monty. 'Yes, it is a bit of a nuisance.
’

'Quite. Well, I think,' said Reggie rising, 'I'll go and stroll for a while on the boat deck.'

He had been gone some few minutes when there was
a
knock on the door. Mabel Spence entered.

'Hope I didn't disturb you,' said Mabel. 'I'm looking for Reggie Tennyson.'

'Just left,' said Monty. 'Boat deck.
’

'Right,' said Mabel.

It was pleasant on the boat deck, or would have been to any man whose life was not wrecked and whose hopes were not lying in ruins. A soft breeze was blowing and quiet stars shone down from a cloudless sky. Reggie hardly felt the breeze, scarcely saw the stars. He clutched the rail as a short while before he had clutched his chair. Solid wood to grasp at is what a man needs at these moments.

It was thus that Mabel Spence found him. The sound of her footsteps made him turn. He released the rail and stood staring at her.

It is never easy to see clearly on boat decks at night, but love sharpens the eyesight and despite the velvet blackness that enshrouded her Reggie was able to detect that Mabel Spence was looking like a million dollars. A hardy girl, who believed in fresh air and its health-giving effect on the skin, she wore no wrap. Her neck and arms gleamed whitely under the stars. And the realization that all this loveliness would shortly be popping off to Southern California while he stayed languishing in Montreal came home to Reggie with such poignant bitterness that the deck seemed to quake under his feet like
a
morass and he could not check a hollow groan.

Mabel appeared concerned.

'Something the matter?' 'Nothing, nothing.'

‘
You can't be feeling seasick on a night like this.
’

'I'm not feeling seasick. It's just-'

'What?'

'Oh, I don't know.' 'Love?'

R
eggie clutched the rail again. ‘
Eh?'

Mabel Spence was a girl who had no use for circumlocution. She never beat about the bush. When there was a matter of urgency on the agenda paper, she lost no time in getting down to it in that quietly efficient way which, though it had never appealed to her brother-in-law Ivor Llewellyn, was considered by most of those who knew her to be one of her attractions.

'I've just been talking to Lottie Blossom. She said you had told her you were in love with me.
’

Reggie tried to speak, but found that his vocal cords were not working.

‘
And I came hunting after you to find o
ut if it was official. Is it?' ‘
Eh?'

‘
Is it true?'

The foolishness of the question annoyed Reggie so much that he found his power of speech miraculously restored. Too damn silly, he felt, her asking a thing like that when for days he had been going out of his way to make it so abundantly clear what his feelings were towards her. An intelligent girl like herself, he meant to say, was surely aware that a fellow does not look at her as he had been looking, squeeze her hand as he had been squeezing it and kiss her on dark decks as he had been kissing her on dark decks, unless he means something by it.

'Of course it's true. You know that.
’
‘
Do I?'

'Well, you ought to. Haven't I been goggling at you for days?'
‘
Yes, you have goggled.
’
'And squeezed your hand?
’

'Yes, and squeezed my hand.
’
'And kissed you?' 'Yes, you've done that, too.
’
'Well, then.'

‘
But I know what you city slickers are like. You think nothing of trifling with the affections of the poor working girl.
’
Reggie bumped back against the rail, aghast. 'What!' 'You heard.' 'You don't imagine-?
’
'Well?'

‘
You don't imagine that I'm one of those butterflies, do you, that my cousin Gertrude talks about?'

'Does your cousin Gertrude talk about butterflies?'

'Yes. And she's right off them. They flit and sip. But I'm not like that. I love you like the dickens.'

‘
Well, that's fine.'

'I've loved you ever since you nearly twisted my neck off that first day.' 'Great.'

‘
I started in worshipping you at that precise moment
’
'Swell.'

'And day by day in every way it's been getting worse and worse ever since.
’
'Don't you mean better and better?
’

'No, I don't mean better and better. I mean worse and worse. And why? Because it's all hopeless. Hopeless,' repeated Reggie, thumping the rail. 'Abso-bally-hopeless.'

Mabel Spence laid a gentle hand upon his arm.

'Hopeless?' she said. 'Why? If what's worrying you is that you think I don't love you, dismiss the foolish notion. I'm crazy about you.'

'You are?
'

'Dippy.'

‘
Would you marry me if I asked you?'
‘I
'm going to marry you even if you dont ask me,' said Mabel.

She spoke with a happy gaiety which to many people -Reggie's uncle John, for one; Mr Ivor Llewellyn, for another

- would have seemed quite unintelligible. The world, indeed, was full of those who could not have imagined anyone talking in that cheery, light-hearted way about marrying Reginald Tennyson.

The effect of her words on Reggie was to make him plunge like a horse, as if he were about to dash his head against the rail. He was profoundly moved.

'But you aren't, dash it. That's the whole point. Can't you understand? I haven't a bean in the world. I can't go about the place marrying people.'

‘
But-'

'I know.
You've enough for two, what?' ‘
Plenty.'

‘
And it wouldn't be any different from marrying an heiress, and all that. I know, I know. But it can't be done.
’
‘Reggie!' 'It can't be done.' ‘
Reggie, darling!'

'No, don't tempt me. It can't be done, I tell you. I wont live on your money. I never thought that high-mindedness of Ambrose's was catching, but so it has proved. I've gone down with it now.'

‘
What do you mean?'

'I'm telling you. Watching Ambrose prancing about the ship exuding honour at every pore has made me a changed man. If you had come to me as short a while ago as yesterday and asked me, "Do the Tennysons play the game?" m
y reply would have been, "Some ti
p and some don't," but now I am compelled to answer, "Yes, blast it, every single bally one of them." I love you, young Mabel, I love you like nobody's business, but I'm positively dashed if I'm going to go through life helping myself out of your little earnings. And that's that, if I die of a broken heart.
’

Mabel sighed.

‘
That's that, is it?
’

‘
Definitely that.'

'You couldn't be just a little less noble?
’
·Not a fraction.'

‘
I see. Well, I respect you, of course,
’

^‘
And a fat lot of good that is! I don't want to be respected.
I
want to be married. I want to sit opposite you at breakfast, pushing my cup up for more coffee -'

- While I tell you the cute thing little Reggie said to his nurse.'

'Exactly. Now that you have brought the point up, I don't mind admitting that there was some sketchy notion of some such contingency floating at the back of my mind.'

'But you still feel you've got to be noble?'

'I'm sorry, old girl, I must. It's like getting religion.
’

'I see.
’

There was a silence. Reggie drew Mabel Spence to him and placed an arm about her waist. He nearly cracked a rib, but brought no comfort either to himself or her.

'The thing that makes me froth so frightfully at the mouth,
’
he said moodily, breaking the long pause, 'is that everything so nearly came right this morning. Those English sequences of old Pop Llewellyn's, you remember. If he had given me a contract to look after those, I should now be in a position to marry at the drop of the handkerchief. And he was within an ace of doing so when that Ambrose business sent him shooting off the deep end.'

'Would you say within an ace?'

'Well, perhaps not quite within an ace, but I think we could have talked him into it. Doesn't it make you sick to think that there is that ghastly brother-in-law of yours, that Llewellyn, perfectly able, if he cared to, to solve all our troubles, and we can't get him into the frame of mind. Or can we? Would it be any good working on him, do you think?
’