Love's Second Chance (Second Chances Series) (15 page)

“Thank you,” she whispered delicately. I ran my hands soothingly up and down her back, savoring in the time I had with her. There was no telling if she would be running away from me again.

“You’re welcome.”

She pulled back to look at me, and her stormy gray eyes were swirling with a thousand emotions. Tears glistened on her cheeks, so I wiped them away with my fingers. She turned her face from me and dabbed the rest away with a tissue. Korinne never did like crying in front of anyone because she always said it would make her look weak if she did. I never understood that because I thought she was far from weak. “I don’t know what to say,” she choked out. “Other than thank you, and what inspired you to do it?”

How could she ask that? Did she not know that I’d do anything for her? “You inspired me, Korinne. I know you love Carson and always will. I have no desire to take his place or to try and make you forget about him. This was something I wanted to do for you; to show you that I’m here for you and I’ll do anything to support you.” I took her face lovingly in my hands. “I know you love me; I have no doubt about it.”

She nodded. “I do, with all my heart, but—” I cut her off so that I could finish what I wanted to say. I had to get it out, because if this was the only chance I had I was going to take it.

“I understand you want to get through this on your own, but I want you to need me, the same way I need you. I’ve missed you so much the past couple of weeks. Please tell me you’re coming back to me now.”

She stepped up on her tiptoes and placed a gentle kiss on my lips. When she pulled back she hesitated, making my heart drop. “Not yet, there’s one more thing I need to do first,” she murmured softly.

Sighing, I dropped my head, but she took my face in her hands and drew me back up to meet her gaze. “Once I finish what I need to do I’ll come right back to you. Trust me, I’m almost there.”

“How long, Korinne?”

She kissed me one more time and I couldn’t stop myself from kissing her feverishly. If she wasn’t coming back to me yet I sure as hell was going to make her remember me. I claimed her with my lips and she reciprocated in kind. I needed her, and I knew she needed me. I could feel her desire to come back to me. “Soon,” she whispered across my lips before turning around and walking away.

 

Chapter Thirteen

 

 

Saying goodbye to Galen for those few weeks was torture. I wanted to call him so badly, but I knew that I needed to finish everything on my own. During those weeks, I drove by the home I’d shared with Carson probably ten times, hoping I would get the courage to go inside. Two days before the reception I finally took the leap and opened the front door. I bet I stood there for an hour before I had the courage to move. Everything was still in place, just the way I left it all those months ago.

I was there now and only one more room needed to be conquered before that part of my life was nothing except a memory. That final room happened to be our bedroom. I’d been putting it off, but I knew I was ready now. Movers were hired, and they came to take the furniture away. Some of it went to storage, but the rest I sold or gave away. If I had the space in my small condo I would have kept it all, but I didn’t. The time had come for me to say good-bye to this house. Carson and I had some great memories here, but those memories would always stay with me no matter where I was. Going down the hallway, the door to our room was closed, making my heart thump wildly in my chest as I got closer. When I was about to turn the knob the doorbell rang.

“You have got to be kidding me!” I screamed out. Stomping all the way to the front door, I opened it to find a smiling Jenna pacing in the doorway. My anger flew out the window at the sight of my lovely friend, smiling radiantly at me.

“Ducky!” she squealed and threw her arms around me.

“What are you doing here?” I shrieked excitedly.

She walked past me and into the house. “You may not need Galen’s help, but I know for a fact you won’t turn down your best friends.” She raised her eyebrows, daring me to contradict her.

I laughed. “Fine, but don’t tell Galen.”

“Your secret is safe with me,” she promised. “So, what’s on the agenda today?”

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “The last and final room,” I admitted softly.

Her smile faded and her eyes shone with understanding. “Well then I made it here just in time.” I could feel my eyes begin to burn, but I held back the tears that were forming. Taking me by the arm, Jenna led me down the hallway to the closed door beyond. “Come on, Ducky, you can do this.”

“I know,” I whispered. We got to the door and I stood there for a few seconds to build the courage again. Taking a few deep breaths, I finally grabbed the handle and turned. My eyes closed instantly as I pushed the door open.

Jenna placed her hands on my shoulders. “Open your eyes, Korinne.” Doing as she said I opened my eyes. The tears that began to sting before had now fallen in rivers down my cheeks. Jenna walked in before me and took a look around while I stood there motionless taking in the sights before me. The four-poster bed Carson and I slept in sat lonely in the middle of the room, perfectly made without a crease in the covers. The sweatshirt he last wore was draped haplessly over the loveseat in the corner; the same loveseat where Carson would read and go over patient files.

Jenna drew me out of my trance when she spoke. “Where should we start?”

I stuttered, “Hmm … let me think, maybe the closet? It’s going to be the hardest part, so why don’t we start there?”

“Sounds good to me, but where are all the boxes?”

I pointed towards the door. “They’re in the kitchen,” I said. She squeezed my shoulder before leaving me alone in the room. I had a feeling she did it on purpose, to give me time for my closure. I walked over to the loveseat where Carson’s favorite sweatshirt lay, and I ran my hands delicately over the soft fabric, like it was the most valuable thing in the world. Right then it was. As soon as I picked it up, Carson’s scent overtook my senses and the tears began to fall harder.

“Oh my God,” I said, breathing in deeply. I couldn’t believe it would still smell like him after all this time. Burying my face in his scent, I collapsed onto the loveseat while the memories began to flood my mind, memories of a time where Carson was my world and I was his; memories that would stay with me for all time. As I sat there thinking about all of those memories, I never once thought about how I would’ve wanted Carson to live his life if the situation was turned. I wouldn’t want him sad and distraught, I would want him to be happy and move on.
I can do this
, I said to myself. It was going to be tough, but I’d made it that far in just a couple of weeks. I would always be sad over Carson’s death, but the good memories we shared would surpass the grief and heartache.

I closed my eyes, soaking in the new found strength that had taken hold in my heart. I didn’t realize Jenna had come back until I heard her voice. “Ducky, you’re scaring me. I expected to come in here to see you broken down on the floor, not smiling.”

I chuckled lightly. “I was just thinking of all the good memories Carson and I had. You know, I can’t think of a single argument we ever went through.”

“I know,” Jenna murmured. “He always gave you everything you wanted and would’ve given you the moon if you asked him.”

I agreed whole-heartedly, “Yes, I know.”

Jenna knelt in front of me, taking my hands in hers. “He wanted you to be happy, and with that being said I know he’d want you to be happy even if that meant finding love with another man.”

I nodded. “I know. I just hate it took me this long to figure that out. That morning in the hospital, when Carson died, he said something to me. He never finished his sentence, but he wanted me to promise him something.”

“What do you think it was?” she asked softly.

“I didn’t know then, but I think I know now. I think he wanted me to promise him that I’d move on and find peace. As silly as that sounds, I feel in my heart that this is what he would’ve wanted. He always thought of others before himself.”

“That sounds like Carson,” Jenna said, smiling. “There’s nothing wrong with what you’re doing. Galen loves you, and Carson would want you happy and in love with someone that will treat you just as good as he did, if not better.”

“I know.”

“Okay, so enough moping. Let’s get this done.” She took a couple of boxes and made her way to the closet. “Have you decided what you want to do with his things? You could always keep them or give them to Goodwill.”

“I think I’m going to keep most of it,” I answered. “I want to keep the things that meant most to him, like this sweatshirt,” I said, looking down at the bundle in my arms. “I don’t think I can part with it.”

“I understand,” Jenna said. “I don’t think I could get rid of Brady’s personal things either.”

While Jenna worked on the closet I worked on the dressers, clearing off the valuable trinkets and pictures. When I saw the picture of Carson and me on our honeymoon, I busted out laughing as a memory came flooding back. The picture looked perfect, with Carson and me smiling while the sun set behind us. We went to Cozumel and it was one of the best times in my life, but what was funny was that right after the picture was taken the dress I was wearing flew above my waist as the wind caught it. I was mortified. It was embarrassing because not only did people see that happen, but I was also wearing a pair of thongs. Needless to say, the people around us got a
full
view.

“What’s so funny?” Jenna asked, snickering at me. I showed her the picture and she burst out laughing. I knew she remembered that day, because I called her right after it happened. I think she laughed for ten minutes straight while I died of embarrassment. At the time it wasn’t funny, but now it was quite hilarious. “I wish I could have been there to see it,” she giggled.

“Yeah, and knowing you, you would’ve captured the moment in a painting and put it in one of your galleries,” I said, laughing.

Jenna feigned innocence by looking shocked. “Do you honestly think I would do that?” she asked with a mischievous smirk on her face.

“I don’t think … I know,” I informed her, stating the facts. We both laughed and it lightened my heart to be able to find the joy in the past.

Packing the picture away, I moved on to other things. There was one tiny box I saw off to the side and I recalled the day I put it there very well. I buried Carson with his wedding band on, but mine … mine was in that little black box. I removed it the day I left to move to my parent’s house because I cried every time I looked at my hand, and I knew I couldn’t handle it anymore. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes while opening the box.

“What are you going to do with your ring?” Jenna asked.

Finally looking down at the beautiful ring, I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I’ll find something to do with it one day, but for now I’ll store it away for safe keeping.”

“I think that would be great,” she claimed.

“Yeah,” I murmured to myself, placing the little black box in with the other things.

“I’m going to start loading these boxes into the car,” Jenna said. She looked toward the bed and pointed. “What do you want to do with your bed?”

The thought of having to get rid of the bed broke my heart. “I don’t want to let it go, but I also don’t want to keep it. It would be great if you or my parent’s needed it.”

“Actually,” Jenna drawled out. “I could use it in the extra bedroom at home. We finally moved out all of our junk from that room and put it in storage. Now all we have is an empty room to fill.”

“Oh, Twink, that would be perfect. I can have it delivered to your house next week.”

“That sounds great,” she huffed while picking up two heavy boxes and heading out the door. I felt better knowing I wasn’t getting rid of it. Once the bedroom furniture was gone, the house would be completely empty and ready to be put on the market. I was happy in my little condo so there was no reason to stay in this huge house all by myself. Now all I needed to do was help pack up the closet. Walking into it wasn’t as hard as I expected. Jenna had packed up most of the stuff already and I was really grateful for that. All that was left now was loading the boxes into the car.

Once they were loaded, I realized that this was my final goodbye to the house. Jenna stood silently beside me as I gazed at what used to be a happy and loving home for me. “Are you ready to go home?” Jenna suggested.

I looked over at her and smiled. “Meet me there? I have one more good-bye to make first.”

Nodding in understanding, she squeezed my arm. “Take your time. I’ll get these unloaded at your condo.” I smiled once more at her before we went our separate ways. The next good-bye was going to be the last thing I needed to do before moving on completely; to finding my way back to Galen.

 

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