Authors: Gwen Kirkwood
Isabella and Zander began to pay more attention to the phases of the moon, willing the silver sickle of the first quarter to move on, then the new moon, followed by the sickle of the last quarter facing the opposite direction. Isabella remembered her father studying the moon but he had watched it for signs of the weather while she watched its changing faces longing for the bright silver light of the full moon and Zander’s visits to her bed.
The weeks passed. Every man, woman and child helped to cut and gather in hay for the winter. The better the crop which could be gathered the more animals they would be able to keep through the winter. Isabella enjoyed these days when she and Anna worked side by side again, exchanging news and giggling together over shared stories but Isabella’s energy began to flag by the end of the second week. This was unusual because she had helped at the hay for as long as she could remember when she was at Braidlands. Fortunately there was time to rest and regain her energy before the harvest of wheat and oats started at the beginning of September. This was even more important than the hay. A good wheat crop meant grain for bread. It had to last all year until the next harvest. They needed dry weather to cultivate the soil and sow the precious seed and rain to make the crops grow, then more sunshine to ripen the grain again. So the cycle went on. Everyone prayed there would be no wars or rampaging reivers to fire the crops when they were almost ready for gathering.
Teams of men sharpened their sickles and cut down the corn. The women followed gathering bundles and binding them into sheaves while other women and children stood them in groups of eight or ten to make a stook so the straw and the ears of grain were lifted off the ground and could dry. The oats were cut earlier but they needed to stand longer for the grain to harden. The older women who worked in the kitchens brought out flagons of ale and oat bannocks with cheese or butter if there was plenty. The youngest children drank milk from the cows. It was during one of these breaks that Anna drew Isabella aside.
‘Are you all right, Anna? You look very pale,’ Isabella remarked with concern. ‘Is the sun too warm for you?’
‘I shall be fine when I have eaten and rested a wee while. I have been sick for six mornings in a row and my courses are two weeks late.’ She seized Isabella’s arm and squeezed it. ‘I think Walter has given me a baby, Isabella!’ Her blue eyes were shining with happiness.
‘A baby? B-but how do you know?’
‘Lizzie says many women are sick when the baby begins. She says my mother was very sick before Henry was born, but not before I was born. Anyway you know I am the same as you, the monthly pest is never late. When Isabella first arrived at Moyenstane, expecting her life to end, she had come without spare clothes or provisions of any kind. Anna had showed her where to find rags to use for what she called the monthly pest. Since then both girls had referred to the monthly cycle as “the pest”. She grinned at Isabella. ‘It is two full weeks late.’
‘I don’t understand.’ Isabella frowned. ‘When I was twelve I told my mother I didn’t like it. She said it was part of being a women. If we didn’t have it we would not have babies.’
‘It is true, I think, but the bleeding does not come while a woman is making a baby.’
‘Are you sure, Anna? I have only had the pest once since your wedding.’ Anna stared at her.
‘You must be making a baby too, then. But I never really thought Henry… Surely it must be a baby, Isabella if you have missed for - for how long?’ Isabella considered carefully.
‘The last was two weeks after your wedding.’ She remembered because she hoped it would never happen when it was a full moon. She felt her prayers had been answered because it had not come at all.
‘That’s more than three months ago! Have you been sick?’
‘No. I’m never ill. I was tired during the hay gathering, but I’m fine now.’
‘I don’t think the sickness affects all women,’ Anna said thoughtfully. ‘We must ask Lizzie. She did say I should notice the monthly pest. Didn’t your mama tell you about these things?’
‘No, but she didn’t know I should be married, or that I would live so far away. There’s so many things I long to tell her, and ask her.’
‘Do you feel any different?’
‘Not really.’ She couldn’t tell Anna about the bubble of joy inside her, or the reason. ‘I have missed you though, dear Anna,’ she added quickly. She could not tell Anna her happiness was due to Zander’s tender loving and the way he made her feel. Anna was looking at her carefully now. She reached out and laid a hand on Isabella’s stomach.
‘Perhaps you are a little fatter? You had such a small waist.’
‘My dresses are a little tighter but we eat so much when we’re working in the fields. I don’t tie the laces so tightly. It’s more comfortable for bending to work.’
‘I think it must be a baby,’ Anna said excitedly. ‘Shall we go and tell…?’
‘No! No Anna, please don’t tell anyone yet.’ Isabella’s face had lost some of its usual colour. ‘I-I must tell…’ she almost blurted out Zander’s name. ‘I must tell Henry first. He is my husband.’
‘Doesn’t he know? Hasn’t he guessed?’
‘I don’t think so.’
‘That’s so like Henry. His mind is always on books or butterflies or wandering in the moonlight,’ Anna said with unusual impatience. ‘It will be wonderful if we both have babies. Now let me see…’ She began to count up the months. ‘Your baby will be born about February. Mine will not be born until May, but I’m sure they will be good friends and play together. Oh Isabella, I’m so excited I want to tell everyone.’
‘Please don’t, Anna. At least wait until we finish gathering in the harvest. I don’t want Lizzie fussing over me,’ she added as an excuse. She felt a longing to talk to her mother. She must tell Zander and Henry of Anna’s suspicions before anyone else knew. She had never considered she and Zander might make a baby. She had been deliriously happy living from one moon to the next, anticipating Zander’s visits to her bedchamber. Would he and Henry be happy if she was expecting Zander’s child?
Zander rarely sought her out during the daytime. She knew he was at pains not to rouse his uncle’s suspicions but she didn’t need to wait for the next full moon to talk to him. She often sought sanctuary in her garden if she wanted to be alone or when she wanted time to think. After a busy day binding and stooking sheaves in the harvest field she was glad to sit down on the stone seat which Henry had made. She had not been there long when Zander joined her.
‘Walter tells me he and Anna are expecting a child. He spoke of her monthly cycle.’ He lowered his voice to little more than a whisper. ‘It occurred to me that we do not share such intimate knowledge of each other when I can only talk with you for a few nights each month, dearest Isabella.’
‘I had not considered it, except to be pleased when it did not trouble me,’ Isabella said truthfully. ‘Indeed I did not know such things changed. Anna says when the seed is growing the cycles cease until the baby is born. My mother never talked of such things. Anna thinks I must be expecting a baby and if she is right it will be born in February.’ She looked anxiously up at him. ‘Are you happy if it is true, Zander?’
‘I know it is what you want so I am happy, dear Isabella, but does that mean I must not come to you anymore?’
‘Oh no! It can’t mean that. I long for you to come Zander. I watch the moon and long for the round bright disc which lights the sky and guides you to me.’
‘Then I am happy,’ Zander said and smiled. ‘I too watch the moon now.’
‘I must tell Henry. Anna wanted to tell everyone today but I asked her to keep it a secret until Henry knows.’
‘Then you must tell him tonight, Isabella. Anna is not good at keeping secrets when she is excited. She will be sure to tell Walter as soon as they are alone together.’
Henry wondered why Isabella seemed so agitated and why she didn’t lie down and close her eyes ready for sleep instead of sitting up in bed and staring at him so intently. He hated her seeing him undress and he turned his back as he tugged on his nightshirt. He wondered if she had watched Zander undress and if she was comparing the two of them. He noticed she had not pulled the long pillow between them tonight as she usually did. He felt apprehensive.
‘Do hurry, Henry. Please don’t blow out the candle I want to see your face.’
‘See my face? Whatever for? You see it every day.’
‘I think I am going to have a baby.’
‘A baby?’ His blue eyes grew round. ‘Are you sure? Has Zander…’
‘Y-yes. Do you mind, Henry?’ Isabella asked feeling nervous.
‘Mind? It is wonderful news, Isabella. I knew Zander would not let me down when I needed his help. Are you happy? Do you feel well?’ He gave a thoughtful frown. ‘I have read that some women are ill at such times. You must take care. You must not work so hard at the harvest.’ Isabella chuckled at his new concern for her and with the wisdom of women the world over she sensed this was a good time to ask him for the favour she wanted.
‘I would like us to stay here, in our own bedchamber at the top of the turret, Henry. I don’t want to move where everybody can hear everything and….
‘Of course we shall stay up here, Isabella. I don’t want to move either.’
‘I know, but Lizzy is getting too old to climb so many stairs caring for me when the baby comes, but I have had an idea. There is a young girl who has been helping with the hay and the harvest. She has no family of her own since her grandmother died. She is thirteen but she is small and very thin. I think she has been caring for the old lady for a long time. They lived in one of the rickety wooden houses on the way to Anna’s but she doesn’t have a home of her own anymore. The man who has the smiddy lives near. He offered her a bed but she seems afraid of him. She says she would rather sleep in a barn. Anna says he is a horrid man.’
‘What is her name?’
‘Nell. Nell Tindle I think. Henry, she seemed so hungry and she is very thin, but she was quick to learn when we showed her how to gather and bind the sheaves and which way to stand them so the rain would run off. I would like to have her for my own maid. I could teach her how to be clean and neat then she could help me with the baby. Later I will teach her to spin and how to weave. There is enough space at the top of our stairs for a truckle bed and a trunk, as well as half a dozen cribs.’
‘Well we shall not need more than one crib,’ Henry said with a smile.
‘Please Henry? I would so like to help her. She seems sweet and kind and she doesn’t remember her own mother. Her father died with a fever three winters ago.’
‘I can’t see any reason why you shouldn’t train the girl to your ways, Isabella. In fact I think it is a splendid idea. Father Oliver, our teacher was very strict about keeping ourselves clean. He insisted we should only drink ale, or water if it was fresh from the spring. Your mother must have been a good teacher too because you already know these things.’
‘So can I go to see Nell tomorrow and ask her to come and live here?’
‘Yes. I shall tell my father but when he hears our news he will grant you anything you desire if it is in his power, Isabella. He may even be reasonable with a request from me too. I would like to make a journey to the monastery to re-stock our herbs and potions and collect some books. I have read the books several times which Father Oliver loaned to me. If I take them back he will let me have others. He knows a lot about the use of herbs for cooking and for medicines. I shall ask him if he has any seeds to spare for your garden.’ He shivered suddenly and Isabella pulled down the long pillow and lifted the quilt. ‘You’re cold, Henry. Blow out the candle and get into bed, and thank you for granting my wish. I think Nell will be happy to come and live here and I shall enjoy teaching her some of the things my mother taught me.’
Henry was not cold. He didn’t understand the sudden urgency which made it imperative for him to visit Father Oliver and learn all he could about women and childbirth and anything he could do to protect and help Isabella. He could never forget that his own mother, and Zander’s, had both died in childbirth. His thoughts and fears kept him awake long after Isabella had fallen into a sound sleep. He had grown very fond of her even though he felt no desire to indulge in the pleasures of a normal husband. He couldn’t bear the thought of her young life being cut short by the birth of her child.
Isabella was surprised when William Douglas came searching for her in the small room off the kitchens where she was adding to her collection of herbs and potions. Soon she hoped to have more from her garden, including lavender and roses to scent her hair and the linen.
‘Ah, there you are m’dear, Isabella.’ He strode towards her with a beaming smile and swept her off her feet in a great hug. ‘Henry tells me you’re going to make me a grandfather at last! He tells me you want to take in Joe Tindle’s wee bairn to train her as a nursemaid?’
‘Yes, I would like to do that. She seems to have no one of her own and I thought her young legs would save Lizzie.’
‘Aye, so they would, eh Lizzie?’ he asked, glancing over his shoulder at the older woman’s smiling face.
‘Aye, and wee Nell could dae wi’ a wee bit o’ kindness.’
‘Her father was a good worker,’ William recalled.
‘Aye, her mother was a decent woman tae, God rest her soul. She didna live long enough to help her wee lassie though,’ Lizzie said, shaking her head, making wisps of her white hair escape from her cap.’