Authors: Maria DeSouza

Love Lost

By: Maria DeSouza

Cover and Interior Graphic Design by Rochelle McGrath @ Shamrock Designs

https://www.facebook.com/ShamrockCoverDesigns

Cover Model: Joe Marvullo

https://www.facebook.com/joe.marvullo.1?fref=ts

Front Cover Photographer: Jubert Gilay Photography

https://www.facebook.com/JubertGilayPhotography

Back Cover Photographer: David Massa Photography

https://www.facebook.com/DavidMassaPhoto

Editor & Formatter: Genevieve Scholl @ Big Bang Book Services

https://www.facebook.com/BigBangBookServices

All Rights Reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or in any means – by electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording or otherwise – without prior written permission.

ISBN-10: 1497555736

ISBN-13: 978-1497555730

DEDICATION

Katelyn and Tyler,

I always tell you to follow your dreams. I wrote this book and pursued my dreams because of you. You are the reason that I push myself to be better, so that you have someone to look up to. I love you more than words could ever say.

Love,

Mommy

P.S. – You can’t read this book right
now, but you will.

One day.

CONTENTS

Acknowledgments i

Chapter One
Pg 2

Chapter Two
Pg 8

Chapter Three
Pg 14

Chapter Four
Pg 21

Chapter Five
Pg 29

Chapter Six
Pg 35

Chapter Seven
Pg 42

Chapter Eight
Pg 48

Chapter Nine
Pg 56

Chapter Ten
Pg 62

Chapter Eleven
Pg 69

Chapter Twelve
Pg 75

Chapter Thirteen
Pg 82

Chapter Fourteen
Pg 88

Chapter Fifteen
Pg 93

Chapter Sixteen
Pg 100

Chapter Seventeen
Pg 106

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

First and Foremost, I would like to thank my family for their support. For chipping in to help me when I needed it. For the constant pushing me to keep after my dream, even through the hurdles that kept me from them. I love you!

Rochelle McGrath @ Shamrock Designs - You have a god given talent, and it will take you places. Thank you for making this girl’s cover come alive in a way that I didn’t think it was possible. Thank you for the cover, the support, and more than that, for the friendship.

Joe Marvullo – You are one of the kindest and most down to earth man I will ever meet. Thank you for giving my character a face. You are an inspiration to many, and will continue to be. Thank you!

David Massa Photography and Jubert Gilay Photography – Thank you for taking the time to take such captivating images. You made choosing a cover photo really difficult but worth it!

Jean Findlay Bowden - Thank you for listening to my very annoying questions and fears. You helped me tremendously and I can’t thank you enough! I love you, Yoda!

My beta readers: Diane, Rochelle, Jean, Kassie, and Jennifer. I was nervous about hearing your feedback but I had nothing to worry about. You all gave me support in my writing and your comments were hilarious!!! I loved your reactions to my story and I hope to continue having you all as a part of my team.

Genevieve Scholl – Thank you for finding the time to help me when I thought I was going to have to wait months. In your busy schedule, you found it in your heart to help a newbie. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

To my inspiration behind Jason – Thank you for telling me to bring this character to life. You will find your own Selene one day. Good luck in Cali and know that you will be missed.

Last, but not least,

Mrs.
Diane Botch - Where do I begin with you? You have taken me on fun adventures throughout the course of our friendship. We have argued. We have laughed. Almost certain, we have cried our eyes out. You are my sister from another mister. You are my best friend. Without you, my life and my family, would not be the same. You are a wonderful wife (not mine but secretly wish you were...wink wink), mother, sister, and friend. Thank you for always being there for me when I felt like I had no one. Thank you for talking some sense into me when I failed to have some. Most of all, thank you for being a friend.

I Love You, D!

The early morning sun beat down on his hard, muscular body that was slightly covered by a thin sheet. His hand reached out to hit the alarm clock then hid back under the covers. Jason stretched out and considered going back to sleep. Monday mornings always seem
ed to be the hardest to wake up to. He rubbed his chin and thought to himself that he needed to shave.

He was 5’ 10” and weighed 180 lbs. He considered himself handsome, but he liked to keep a modest attitude. No one likes a cocky asshole. Jason sat up and stretched some more. He climbed out of the bed and got dressed for work. His body was toned and well defined, thanks to all his running. He liked to workout but didn’t want to overdo it either. He went to the gym every day and was determined to stay fit, since chasing down criminals was his life.

He worked as a homicide detective for the New York City Police Department, and was recently promoted after only two and a half years on the police force. Being a cop had been a dream of his since childhood. His father was a cop and so was his grandfather. It ran in the family and Jason wasn’t going to end the tradition. He felt like he had to prove himself sometimes with the accomplishments his father and grandfather set before him, but he was always up for the challenge.

Jason looked around at his loft while searching for his keys and thought about all the work that had been done. He had been on patrol when he had come across this building. It was worn down and severely neglected and it had been used as a club at one point, but a fire had demolished almost half of the building. The owner at the time had been desperate to get rid of it, and Jason had gotten it for almost nothing. He tore down the burnt, damaged walls and turned it into a studio loft. It took almost a year for it to be completely finished.

Remembering he had somewhere to be, Jason grabbed his keys from the counter where he’d dropped them the night before, and left to go to work.

He was thinking about his parents and paying them a visit as he walked into the coffee shop. This was a stop in his daily routine on his way to work. As Jason waited in line to order, he couldn’t help but notice the woman in front of him. She was wearing a tight blue dress that hugged her every curve like a second skin. Her curly black hair was pulled back into a ponytail and as she leaned over the counter, his eyes were immediately drawn to her perky behind. He didn’t realize how close he was standing until she turned around and spilled her coffee on him.

“I’m so sorry. Oh my god! Did I burn you?” She looked up and her chocolate brown eyes burned right through him. It took a second for him to break out of her gaze. He looked down at his now coffee-stained shirt and smiled.

“I’m good. A little hot, but no harm done.” He wasn’t able to pry his eyes away from her. She was so beautiful and the more she fumbled to help him, the more he was drawn to her.

“I know you are,” she responded. He laughed and she looked up confused until she realized what she’d said.

“I meant about the coffee, not…” she blushed slightly. Jason signaled to the barista and placed his usual order. He started to remove his shirt when he noticed her eyes glance toward him and quickly look away. His vest had prevented the coffee from reaching his muscle shirt, and his skin for that matter.

“See. It protects me from bullets and dangerous coffee.” The barista, Mike, handed him his coffee as
the woman got up and started to reach into her purse.

“The least I can do is pay for your coffee and your dry cleaning.”

Jason smiled and replied, “I can pay for my coffee, and I do my own laundry. But you can join me for coffee instead. Compensate me with your company, since you owe me.”

She smiled but he noticed it didn’t seem to reach her eyes.

“I don’t even know your name. How do I know you’re not a serial killer?”

“My name is Jason Straiz. If I
were a serial killer, I don’t think a coffee shop is where I would be looking for victims. I’ll sit over there by the window and try to dry off my shirt while you decide if I’m Hannibal Lector.” As he walked over to the window seat, he secretly hoped that she would join him. He sat down and after several minutes, she walked over to the table.

“My name is Selene. Selene Mendez.”

Jason gestured toward the empty chair across from him. “It’s nice to meet you, Selene.”

Selene sat down and looked over at Jason.

“I’m usually not this clumsy. Seriously.”

He looked down at his coffee before looking back at her and responded, “I’ll be honest with you
: I was a little distracted, so we’re even.”

Selene sipped her coffee and made a gesture
toward his vest.

“So how long have you been a cop?”

Jason laughed. “Oh, so I’m not Hannibal Lector anymore?”

Selene shook her head. “I’m almost positive that you’re not planning on kidnapping me or eating me.”

He raised his eyebrows at her response. She almost spit up her coffee at the double meaning. “I didn’t mean it like that. You know what I mean.”

Jason was enjoying watching her blush.

“Two and a half years. I was promoted to homicide detective a few months ago.”

Selene looked surprised. “Wow. That’s impressive. Usually you have to be on the force for five years before being eligible for a promotion, right?”

He frowned. “Yeah. How’d you know that?”

“Well, I’m a lawyer and I work for the District Attorney. I’m an ADA
; my office is a few blocks down from here. You work homicide? That has to be tough.”

He nodded his head in agreement. “At times. My job is easy compared to yours. I just catch them and charge them. You’re the one that has the pleasure of having to find a way to keep them in jail.”

She played with her coffee stirrer, and avoided his eyes. “Very true. How do you deal with it? I mean, does it ever get to you?”

Jason looked at her and fought with the urge to hold her. What the hell was wrong with him? He needed to get a grip. He leaned over and answered, “I usually tend to distract myself with beautiful women.”

She laughed and pushed him gently. “Funny. A cop and a comedian.”

Jason started to say something when Selene’s phone rang. She looked at it, frowned, and then quickly put it down.

“It’s almost 8 o’clock and I need to get to my office.”

“Duty calls. I need to get to the precinct, too. It was nice meeting you, Selene. Maybe we’ll see each other again.”

“You never know, maybe we will.”

They got up and he walked her to her car. As he climbed into his car and started to drive, he couldn’t help look back at her through his rear view mirror and smile. He was looking forward to the following morning, and hopefully run
ning into Selene again.

Selene sat in her car and watched Jason walk toward his. He looked shirtless except for the vest and muscle shirt underneath, and she caught a nice view of his upper body. He had tattoos going up his right arm and on his chest. She started to imagine ways of further inspecting the tattoos when her phone rang. It was her best friend and business partner, Daphne Barkowitz.

“Hey, D. What’s going on?”

Daphne and Selene co-owned the practice where she worked. Selene was an assistant district attorney and Daphne took on corporate law. On occasion, they would take on a case or two for a friend or someone in need. They both graduated from Columbia University together and had known each other since freshman year of college.

“Are you bringing me my coffee? I need my caffeine, Sel!”

Selene laughed. “I’m sorry. I was a little…distracted.”

Daphne quickly asked, “Ok, spill. What did he look like?”

Selene turned on her car and started for the office, with a smile plastered on her face the whole time.

“Yeah, I did that already. No thanks. Besides, what makes you think a guy would distract me so easily?”

Daphne laughed. “Because I
know
you. You never make time for yourself. It’s always about work with you, and sometimes you need a little male distraction. So tell me, was he hot?”

Selene couldn’t stop laughing.

“Yeah. In more ways than one.”

She started to fill Daphne in on what happened at the coffee shop as she pulled into her office. She walked through the glass doors and greeted the security guard, Paul. She headed into her office and found Daphne sitting there, drumming her fingers on the desk.

Daphne came from money but didn’t like to tell anyone and Selene respected her for it. She was a spitfire of a woman that no one wanted to go up against in court. She was extremely smart and had the world at her fingertips. Daphne’s father bought the building where their business was located so she could start her own practice, and Daphne convinced Selene to join her. It had taken a lot of persuasion, but Selene finally caved in. They fought on the name, but Selene insisted on being a silent partner. Barkowitz LLP was born, and the rest was history.

Selene handed her a large coffee and she started to breathe in the enticing aroma. She looked like she was on the verge of having an orgasm. She had short blonde hair and a smile that could bring any man to his knees. She was the opposite of Selene. Selene was short and curvy, whereas Daphne was tall and thin. She watched her worship her coffee while she sat in the chair opposite of her.

“So, are you going to call him?”

Selene shook her head. “I don’t have his number, and I never gave him mine. So, I doubt he’ll be able to call me.”

Daphne stood up and looked at Selene. “Why didn’t you give him your number?”

Selene looked at her best friend and turned to stare out the window.

Daphne walked over and put her hand on her friend’s shoulder. “He can’t get to everyone, Sel. You
can
have a life.”

She flinched from her friend instinctively and got up to go to her desk. “I used to think that, D. You know where that got me. I need to review some cases. I’ll talk to you later.”

Daphne gave Selene one last look before turning to leave. Selene hated to be short with Daphne but she needed some space from this conversation. When she had her walls up, there was no tearing them down. She knew Daphne was just concerned and wanted to help her any way she could if Selene would only let her. Despite the years of friendship, Selene had never truly let Daphne into her past and it was the only way to protect her. If she didn’t know about it, then she wouldn’t be in danger. Daphne went back to her office, leaving her alone in her office.

Selene walked over to her desk and sat down. She took a deep breath and started to go over one of her cases when her office phone rang. She grabbed it to answer the call.

“Good Morning, Barkowitz Law Offices-”

A deep menacing voice came over the phone.

“Good Morning, Ms. Mendez.”

Selene froze. The little hairs on her skin were standing on end.

“Lucio. Why the hell are you calling me?”

“I miss you. We should have dinner. How about tonight? I can-”

“Lucio, let me make this perfectly clear. I am never going to see you again. Stop calling me. You’re a monster, and I want nothing to do with you.”