Love Entwined (20 page)

T
wo days have passed since Bentley’s accident—two days have passed since he’s opened his eyes—two days have passed since I’ve heard his voice—two days have passed since I’ve heard nothing but the gentle beep of his heart monitor reassuring me that he’s alive.

He was in surgery when I arrived at the hospital on Saturday night. The surgeons were able to stop the hemorrhaging and inserted a chest tube to reinflate his lung. The swelling in his brain had diminished, but the attending doctor said we wouldn’t know the extent of his brain trauma until he regained consciousness—if he regained consciousness. At this point, it was all a game of wait and see. They were talking about my boyfriend’s life as if it were a game of Chutes and Ladders.

After Bentley was out of surgery and the doctors had stabilized him, they’d allowed me to stay in his room. I was horrified when they first let me see him. Katie and Greg waited for me out in the ICU lobby as I went into Bentley’s room alone. He lay lifelessly in his bed. Everything was motionless except for the rise and fall of his chest with each beat of the ventilator which was the only thing keeping him alive—and here with me.

The nurses brought in some extra blankets and pillows for the window seat that could convert into a bed if I wanted to try and get some sleep.

The next morning, the orderly brought me a bag with Bentley’s belongings. Most of his clothes were ruined from the paramedics having to cut through them, but his jacket was still in one piece. I removed it from the bag and brought it to my chest, breathing in his familiar, crisp scent. For a moment, I could avoid the sterile smell of the hospital and pretend none of this was happening.

As I was laying the coat down next to me, I felt something hard in the pocket. Investigating further, I pulled out a black, velvet ring box. Opening the box, I noticed it held a stunning French-set halo diamond. The sunlight cascading through the window reflected off the diamond, creating a dancing effect on the white, hospital room walls.

I cried as I realized that Katie had been right as usual. With everything that had happened in the last twelve hours, I’d forgotten what the previous night was supposed to symbolize. I’d forgotten that I was ever scared to be Bentley’s wife. Truth is, I wanted nothing more than for him to be my future. I loved Bentley and I wanted nothing more than to be his wife. I just hoped that he knew that as well as I did.

“Yes,” I whispered to myself. “I would be honored to be your wife, James Bentley Roberts.”

I slipped the ring on my finger and held it in the light for a few minutes before placing it back in the box. I wanted to keep it on my finger more than anything, but I always wanted nothing more than for Bentley to be the one to place it there. I slipped the box back in Bentley’s jacket pocket, saying a silent prayer that he would wake up and everything would be the way it was meant to be.

The nurses coming in and out of Bentley’s room to check his vitals had kept me awake most of the night. Katie had begged me to go home and get some rest, but I couldn’t leave Bentley when he was still unconscious and in the ICU. With less brain swelling, the doctors had been able to ween him from the sedatives and were able to remove the ventilator. It was a step in the right direction, but Bentley was still unconscious. I wanted nothing more than to see his chocolaty eyes and hear his smooth voice.

I’d just received some news of my own and although I should’ve been ecstatic, all I felt was an emptiness. I was alone all over again.

As I reached for Bentley’s limp hand, I hoped he could hear me. “I don’t know how to tell you this, so I’m just going to say it,” I said, pausing to take a deep breath. “I’m pregnant. You’re going to be a daddy again.”

Using the back of my hand, I wiped the tears from my eyes. I don’t know why, but I guess I hoped that my sudden admission would bring Bentley back to me.

I’d been throwing up ever since Bentley had been taken into the ER two nights before. At first, I thought it was just my nerves and stress, but as the hours went by, I began to suspect it was something a little more. Even the scent of my favorite latte had me running for the bathroom. And, since I’d hardly eaten a bite in over forty-eight hours, I was fairly certain I could rule out food poisoning.

I’d snuck off to the hospital gift shop when Katie and Greg had come to sit with Bentley. I’d lied to Katie and told her I was going to the cafeteria to grab a bite to eat. Since she and Greg had been hounding me about eating, they were more than happy to sit with Bentley for a few minutes. After everyone had left for the evening, I used the adjoining bathroom to take the test.

I’d always been so careful not to allow this to happen. I never wanted children—primarily because I was afraid that something might happen to me someday. I didn’t want my children to go through the pain that I went through—I didn’t want them to have to grow up feeling alone. And, yet here I was. Alone on a cold bathroom floor waiting for two tiny, pink lines to appear.

I sat and stared at my phone, waiting for three minutes to pass before looking at the white test stick. I took a deep breath before glancing at it.

“Looks like I’m going to be a mommy,” I said to myself, rubbing my invisible baby bump. I walked back out into the room and sat in the chair beside Bentley’s bed. Wishing again that he would wake up, now more than ever.

I was surprised to see Katie standing in the doorway. “Katie! What are you doing here? I thought you and Greg had left for the night,” I said, trying to hide my surprise.

“We did, but we were nearly home and I realized I’d left my purse in the room,” she said. “See, there it is,” she added, pointing at the black Michael Kors bag sitting in the corner of the room.

“You could’ve called. I would’ve kept it safe until morning.”

“My prenatal vitamins are in it. I don’t have any extra at home and I didn’t want to miss my daily dose. They’re important, you know,” she said, eyeing me suspiciously.

“How much did you hear standing over there?” I asked.

“Enough,” she admitted, sheepishly.

“Oh.” It was the only response I had.

“I wasn’t trying to eavesdrop. I swear.”

“It’s OK. I know you didn’t mean any harm.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you thought you might be pregnant? I would’ve sat with you while you took the test.”

“I know, but since Bentley was in no condition to hold my hand through it, I figured I should do it alone,” I sighed. “I hope you understand. You know I wouldn’t have been able to keep it a secret for long.”

Her next question surprised me. “Are you happy?”

“Yeah, I think so,” I said, biting the inside of my cheek. “You were right. He was going to propose. I found the ring in his jacket pocket last night. I told him ‘yes.’”

“Oh my god! Why didn’t you tell me earlier? My girl is getting married and having a baby!”

“Not exactly. Bentley never got a chance to officially propose. He needs to wake up and ask me first,” I said with a half-smile.

“He will and he will. You just wait and see. You’ve waited long enough for your HEA.”

“You read too many of those cheesy romance novels,” I chuckled.

I’d just drifted back to sleep in the chair beside Bentley’s bed with his hand in mine when I felt him stir. My head snapped up and I saw his gorgeous brown eyes looking back at me.

“Bentley!” I shrieked, tears streaming down my face. “You’re awake. Thank god you’re awake.”

Removing his hand from mine, he stared at me in confusion.

“I should go get the doctor,” I said. “Don’t try to talk, or move too abruptly. Your lung collapsed during the accident and they had to insert a chest tube. They took you off the ventilator earlier today so your throat is probably quite sore. And, your left arm is also broken and in a sling.”

Standing up, I pressed the nurse’s call button. Bentley continued to stare at me blankly—void of any emotion.

“I’m sorry that was probably a lot to throw at you all at once. Just try and stay calm while we wait for the doctor.”

“My name’s James,” he gasped, wincing from the pain. “And, Staci? Where’s Staci?”

“Shh. Bentley, baby, you must be confused. Why would you want Staci here?”

“My wife? I need Staci. Please bring Staci,” he said, barely above a whisper. Before I had a chance to question him any further, he’d drifted back to sleep.

Another day passed and Bentley only woke up for that brief moment. After going over Bentley’s most recent tests along with his asking for Staci, the doctor believed Bentley was suffering from Retrograde Amnesia, a form of post-traumatic amnesia.

We wouldn’t know the severity of his concussion and symptoms until he woke up again, but from what I’d researched online in the hospital room, his recovery could take from just a few hours to several months. Katie had begged me to stay away from Web MD, because my mind would conjure up the worst possible scenarios, but I had to get some answers—even if it did worsen my anxiety.

From what I’d learned, Retrograde Amnesia was a loss of memories that were formed shortly before the injury. Since Bentley woke up and immediately asked for Staci, without even acknowledging me, it left me to believe that he didn’t remember me—at least the grown up me. I feared that in Bentley’s current mental state, I was still just a distant memory of a fourteen-year-old girl—definitely not his now pregnant fiancée.

I’d done as Bentley had requested and asked Staci and Tanner to both come and stay in his room. I wanted everyone there when he woke up again. Since he woke up briefly yesterday, the doctor suspected he would be regaining full consciousness soon. He’d also removed the chest tube so Bentley was resting more comfortably.

I was sitting in the window seat when I overheard Staci talking to Bentley.

“Jamie—Jamie, open your eyes for us again? Come back to us,” she begged.

I knew she was only trying to help, but I couldn’t hold back the tears. I should be the one holding his hand, talking to him, asking him to wake up—to come back to me. She’d already had her chance to love him and to be loved by him and she blew it. I didn’t even want to think about the possibility that she would be given a second chance.

As I was wiping the tears from my eyes, I heard Bentley’s raspy voice.

“It’s OK, I’ve come back to you—to both of you. I’m here now,” he whispered.

My head snapped up.
To both of you?
Does he remember me, too? My initial excitement was short-lived when I looked over to his bedside and remembered Tanner was sitting there with Staci. Bentley had come back to Staci and Tanner. They were getting their second chance as a family and I was losing everything I’d ever loved—again.

I wanted to leave the room and escape this unfolding nightmare, but instead I tortured myself and watched their happy reunion.

“Oh, thank god you’re awake,” Staci said in relief. “I’ll go get the doctor. He should probably examine you now that you’re awake.”

“Just give me a minute with you,” Bentley pleaded. “I just want to hold you.”

“Jamie,” she said, pulling back. “Do you remember anything—anything about the accident—about falling?”

“No, I didn’t even know I’d fallen. It’s all pretty fuzzy. I only remember waking up briefly and calling out for you. The nurse said she would get you.”

“The nurse?” she questioned.

“He thinks I’m the nurse?” I said to myself, my tears now falling faster. “Isn’t that just rich.”

"Jamie, she isn't your nurse. That's Ireland,” Staci tried explaining.

"Ireland?” Bentley asked, confusedly. "I don’t understand. Why is Ireland here?"

"Because you were planning on marrying her, Jamie." I had to give Staci some credit. At least she was acknowledging my role in Bentley’s life and not just dismissing me all together.

“Staci, you aren’t making any sense. How can I marry another woman when you’re my wife?”

“She’s not your wife. She’s a cheating whore. You love me. You wanted to marry me! You bought me a ring!” I wanted to shout all of that and more, but instead I sat quietly as tears continued cascading down my cheeks.

“Jamie, we haven’t been married for nearly a year,” she said, biting down on her lip. “I really think I should go get the doctor now.”