Authors: Lori Foster
“How's your stomach?” Allison asked, as they walked in the back door leading to the kitchen.
Jake held the screen door open and followed her in. “I'm stuffed from dinner, but if you're talking about the kick I took from Sam, I'll be fine.”
When she flipped the kitchen light on, she stepped around the sawhorses set up in the middle of the room. Renovations may have been coming along fast, but the mess and inconvenience always made it seem longer.
She walked into the living room and hung her coat and purse on the hall tree in the foyer.
“Thanks for dinner,” she told him, shaking her hair over her shoulders. “I'm glad you got me out of the house.”
“Don't you mean dragged?” he joked, coming into the spacious room and taking a seat on the sofa.
“I wasn't dragged!” She laughed, taking a seat beside him. “I went of my own will. I'll admit there was some persuasion on your part, though.”
Jake loved seeing her smile, loved watching that light sparkle in her eyes. If he had his say, he'd be seeing that beautiful face long after his work here was done. But no need to scare her. It was time to ease his way deeper into her life. Someone as fragile and vulnerable as Allison definitely required baby steps, though she'd probably throw horse crap at him again for suggesting such a thing.
She sank into the cushions and sighed. With her head tilted back and her eyes closed, she muttered, “I really should go check on the puppies.”
Jake took in the sight of her. Though she'd put on a green sweater that did amazing things to the curves she'd kept hidden, and had donned a touch of makeup, she still looked physically exhausted.
“I'll go check on them. Wait right here and don't move.”
He grabbed his coat and ran out the back door. Once he made sure the dogs were safe in the tack room for the night, complete with food and water in their bowls, he rubbed their little furry heads and closed the door. He even checked on the horses he'd come to love. Funny how just a month ago he’d known nothing about them, but now watching Allison work with them, care for them as if they were children, he found himself not so eager to return to Florida, where a condominium awaited him.
For a guy who’d loved the beach life, it was hard to believe that horses and a certain raven-haired beauty seemed so much more appealing.
His boots crunched over the gravel as he made his way back to the house. He assumed he'd find Allison asleep on the couch, but when he entered, he found her running the vacuum. Seriously?
“What are you doing?” he yelled over the humming of the sweeper.
Okay, that was a dumb question, but the fact that she was cleaning was even dumber.
She tapped the switch with her foot, sending the room into silence. “I haven't cleaned in here for a while, and all the dust from the remodeling was driving me nuts.”
“You just can't relax, can you?” he asked, walking over to take the vacuum from her hand.
“I'm not good with staying still,” she told him with a grin. “I never have been. If things need doing, I can't just sit and pretend they'll get done on their own.”
He shoved the sweeper into the corner and came back, taking her hands in his. “But the dust and any other chores will still be there after you take some time for yourself.”
“I wouldn't know how.” Those emerald-green eyes came up to meet his. “Do you know what it's like to not know where your next meal will come from? Or if your heat will get kicked off because your junkie father forgot to pay the bills?”
Oh, Lord. She was ready to open up. Jake had waited for this moment, but now that it presented itself, he wasn't so sure he was ready to hear it. But he would listen, because he was finding himself falling a little harder for Allison each day, and he'd be damned if couldn't man up when she needed him most.
He tugged her over to the couch, tucking her into his side with his arm around her. “No, I have no clue what that's like,” he whispered against her ear.
“If I didn't find something to cook for us, if I didn't write the checks and put the bills in the mail, who knows what would've happened.
“My father couldn't hold a job for longer than a week or two, because he'd either steal or be too hungover to show up for his shift. If we didn't have the money coming in from my mother's social security, I don't know how we would've survived.”
Jake gritted his teeth. How the hell did a father, a supposed man, allow a young girl to take care of him? Jake wanted to find the jerk and pummel him.
“I remember one time, my dad told me to call a friend to come get me because he was going to kill himself.” Allison sat up, looking into Jake's eyes. “I almost wanted him to. Is that terrible? I mean, at that time I was ten and I had lived for five years like this and I just wanted to go live with anyone else. I wanted to know what it was like to have a roof over my head, food in the kitchen and no fear of having the heat shut off. I wanted someone else to give me security, but at the same time I felt guilty, because if I left, who would take care of my dad?”
Jake wiped the lone tear streaking down her cheek. “Even though that loser completely neglected you, you were still determined to save your family. Don't even try to convince me you're not remarkable, Allison. I know better.”
She blew out a breath and smiled. “I don't know about that, but I do know that I'd lost my mother, and even though my father was a deadbeat, I didn't want to lose him, too. I mean, he was really all I had left. That was the only life I knew.”
Allison shook her head and came to her feet, forcing his hands to fall to the cushion. He watched her pace to the window and wondered how long she'd battled this inner war with herself.
“You were lucky when Charlie came along, then,” he told her rigid back. “I wish I’d known him beyond when I was a kid.”
Allison threw a smile over her shoulder. “I can't even begin to express how proud he was of you.”
That wedge that had driven his mother and uncle apart only made his heart ache for the love and bond that was stolen from him.
Jake stood and crossed the scarred floor. “I'm glad you two had each other. I'm a firm believer that paths cross in life just when we need someone most.”
When he placed his hands on her shoulders to turn her fully around, it wasn't tense muscles he felt, but soft, relaxed woman.
“Do you believe that, Allison?” he murmured, as he leaned in closer to those lips that mocked him.
“Right now I'll believe anything if it means you're going to kiss me,” she said, smiling.
How could a man turn down an invitation like that?
Enveloping her in his arms, Jake leaned down and kissed her. Arching her backward, he completely overpowered her. He didn't want to be so demanding, but he couldn't stop himself from taking control any more than he could stop his myriad feelings where this woman was concerned.
She clutched his shirt, moaning, as he deepened the kiss and ran a hand down to the small of her back, his fingers slipping just inside the waistband of her jeans.
“Take me upstairs,” she murmured against his lips.
“We can go to my room,” he told her.
She eased back, looking him in the eyes. “No. I've never had a man in my bedroom, and I want it to be you.”
Jake was utterly humbled at the fact that she’d not only opened up enough to trust him, but that she’d invited him to her bed. They could've been naked and on the couch at this point, but she wanted to bring him just another level deeper into her world.
And he wasn't about to turn her down.
He led the way up the stairs, stopping several times to kiss and undress her. By the time they reached her room at the end of the hall, Allison was down to a sheer purple bra and matching panties.
“And you thought your wardrobe was boring,” he joked as he started work on his own shirt removal.
Allison laughed, reaching to assist him. “Just because I'm farm girl on the exterior doesn't mean I can't be a little more feminine on the inside.”
He tossed his shirt into the corner and toed off his shoes. “Thank God for that.”
Allison watched as Jake finished undressing, and she was doing a little thanking God herself. Mercy sakes, she'd seen him without his shirt before, on that first day when she'd smacked his face with horse manure, but now that she knew this man was in her bedroom, wanting to make love to her, she could appreciate the package all the more.
Rippling muscles covered by taut, tanned skin clearly showcased that this man hadn’t gained his drool-worthy body in some gym with the AC running. No, those glorious pecs and well-defined abs were evidence of all the hard work he did for a living.
She was so glad she'd put on her prettiest bra and panty set tonight.
“I have a confession,” she told him, stepping back to admire him as he stood wearing only a pair of black boxer briefs. “When we left tonight, I was hoping we'd end up back here, just like this.”
As he stalked toward her, her heart quickened. She bumped into the bed and fell back.
“Oh, yeah,” he said, looming over her. “I've been hoping we'd end up just like this since you flung crap in my face.”
Allison laughed. “You're so lying.”
“Do you really want to discuss this now?” he asked, bracing his hands on either side of her head and sliding one firm thigh up onto the bed beside her heated body.
“I don't want to discuss anything.”
Allison barely got her answer out before Jake descended on her, wrapping her in his strong, warm embrace. They rolled over the mattress, throw pillows sliding to the floor, underwear quickly discarded.
And from somewhere, she didn't know and didn't care where, Jake produced a condom. As he hovered above her and she looked up into his eyes, she wanted to remember this moment forever. She wanted to always remember this feeling of passion, desire and…love.
God, how could she already love him when she'd known him less than two months?
As he slid into her, he kissed her. Slow, soft motions, as if to keep the moment from slipping away. He wasn't just making love, he was cherishing her.
And that's how she knew she could love this man. He'd taken his time with her. He'd let her invite him into her bedroom, instead of seducing his way in there as most men would do.
As Allison dug her nails into his back, her body hummed and demanded more. She arched her back, breaking the kiss.
“That's it, sweetheart,” he murmured. “I've got you.”
Allison let the overwhelming sensations claim her. Jake kissed her neck, her breasts, as wave after wave of pleasure consumed her, and just as she was coming down, his body tensed, his eyes locked onto hers and he, too, relinquished control of his body.
As their bodies stopped trembling, Allison pulled the covers up around them, silently asking him to stay. When he tucked her against his side and kissed her forehead, she knew she'd done it. She'd gone and fallen head over dirty work boots in love with him.
And he was more than likely going to not only sell her house, but leave and go back to the life he knew—a life she would be no part of.
Jake wasn't a shrink, but he did know when something wasn't right. He and Allison had made love two nights ago. He'd even spent the night in her bed and made love to her again that next morning. And now she was acting as though nothing had happened.
She hadn't once tried to kiss him or even cop a feel. Nor was she at the other end of the spectrum, pouting and sulking as some women did because they didn't know how to approach a man after sleeping with him.
No, Allison was right, smack-dab in the center and not giving him any type of vibe.
And he was starting to get a bit pissed about it. Just once he'd like her to show some emotion, voice how she felt instead of going about this daily routine she'd bottlenecked herself into. He'd love for her to just cut loose and have a yelling fit. She kept all her feelings so guarded, he knew it was just a matter of time before everything bubbled to the surface and exploded.
Now that the plumbing and the sink were installed and the laminate wood floor was partially down, Jake decided to take a break and head out to the stables, where she'd been keeping herself more and more lately.
As he walked, he noticed a full-size truck and trailer pulling out of the drive. His gaze drifted to where Allison stood with one hand shielding her eyes from the sun, the other holding her jacket closed around her waist.
As he got closer, he realized she'd been crying…and then he remembered.
“Was that Sam?” he asked.
She nodded. “Yeah. He's officially got a new home. You should've seen the little girl's face when she found out the horse was for her.”
Damn. Had he known she'd been out here dealing with all this, he would've put that kitchen floor on hold.
“I'm sorry,” he told her, knowing there were no words to ease her hurt.
“Oh, you'd think I'd be used to this,” she declared, waving an arm and turning to go back into the stable. “I'm thrilled Sam has a new home, and I'm even more excited the little girl's mom and dad were able to give such a great present to her. She was so happy, Jake. It’s just…”
With her back to him, she stopped, dropped her head in her hands and sobbed. The gut-wrenching sounds tugged at his heart as he moved around her and pulled her into his arms. Her body shook, her hands clutched at his shirt and tears soaked through the material.
There was no need to say the words aloud. They both knew Allison saw herself in that little girl's eyes. Allison saw the child she'd wanted to be, but fate had had different plans for her. As if saying goodbye to the horse weren't hard enough.
After several minutes, Allison eased back with a pink nose and red-rimmed eyes. Tear tracks streaked down her creamy skin, and he wished like hell he could make her life so happy she’d never have to cry again.
“I'm sorry,” she told him, wiping her nose with the back of her hand. “I'm an ugly crier, but I couldn't help it. You just happened along at the wrong time.”
He lifted her chin with his index finger and thumb, staring straight into those beautiful eyes. “Actually, I think I came along at the right time.”
Her swift intake of breath told him she knew he wasn't referring only to seeing her cry over the adoption.
“You can't mean that, Jake.” She stepped back, avoiding his grasp. “Don't say things just because we slept together.”
“Do I strike you as someone who would speak in niceties just because I slept with you? Allison, quit putting up this wall so you won't get hurt.” Anger coursed through him, fueling his words before he could really think. “You're missing out on life because you're moving away from people who care for you. You're deliberately pushing me away by avoiding me.”
She rolled her eyes and stalked by him. “I'm not avoiding you.”
Jake started to reach for her when Tucker walked in. “Hey, Jake.”
“Tuck, could you leave us for a bit?”
Tucker looked from Allison to Jake, as if he wasn't sure what he should do or who he should take orders from.
“Uh, sure,” the elderly man answered. “I've got to run into town to the feed store anyway. I'll be a while.”
Once they were alone again, Jake marched over to the tack room, where Allison had disappeared. She was squatting down feeding the puppies.
“Damn it, will you stand up and look at me?”
Allison came to her feet, turned and laced her fingers together in front of her. “What? Do you want me to argue? I know I put up walls, Jake. You're not telling me anything new. I have to. Don't you see? Everyone I've ever loved has left me in some form or another. I can't afford to get close to people. You don't know what it's like.”
Jake moved forward, taking her by the shoulders and giving her a gentle shake. “Don't I? You aren't the only one who's lost people they loved, Allison. My mother died, I had an uncle I didn't know and my wife walked out on me. You're not the only one who's known loss, but building this bubble around yourself won't keep hurt from seeping in. So you might as well take down this defense and knock this chip off your shoulder and let people into your life. People who want to care for you, comfort you. Love you.”
Allison's heart stopped. She literally held her breath for fear that she'd throw off the intensity of the conversation if she so much as exhaled. What if she hadn't heard right? What if she'd just mistaken what he meant?
Jake dropped his hands and stepped back. “Forget it. I shouldn't have said anything. I need to get back to work.”
He stalked off, leaving her standing in utter shock in the tack room while five little fur babies jumped at her legs. As if her whole life hadn't just taken a major turn, she bent back down and finished feeding the dogs. She needed to come to grips with what had just happened.
Jake…loved her? No, impossible. He couldn't love her. He pitied her, which was the dead last thing she wanted from anybody.
Damn, why did she have to get involved with him? She’d known this would happen. She’d known once he heard her history he'd want to play the white knight. Well, that was another fairy tale she’d never believed in.
But she couldn't stand the thought of hurting Jake's feelings, so she found herself stalking toward the house after him.
When she entered the back door, he was standing over the sawhorses measuring another piece of laminate flooring.
“Go back outside,” Jake told her without turning around. “I'm not in the mood for an argument.”
Heart beating hard against her chest, Allison moved closer. She stood on the other side of the sawhorses and waited until he looked up at her.
“Did you mean it?” she whispered, scared to hope, but finding it impossible not to.
His eyes searched her face, the muscle ticking in his jaw. “Yes.”
Closing her eyes on an exhale, Allison smiled. “How do you know?” she asked, looking at him again.
Jake rested his hands on the piece of flooring and leaned forward. “How do I know I love you? It should be simple, but since I came here, that word has stopped being part of my vocabulary. I thought I could do some repairs, sell the house to my potential buyer and be back in Florida within a couple months.”
He shoved off the wood and raked both hands through his hair. “But the second I saw your compassion for these horses and learned all you had overcome, I was amazed. Your determination, your passion, the way you throw every fiber of your being into all you do, made me realize I've never met anyone like you. I've never met someone who makes me want to be a better person, who makes me think of her every waking second.”
Allison came around the work area and gazed up into his eyes. “You almost sound upset by the fact.”
“I am,” he admitted, resting his hands on her shoulders. “I'm upset because I want to beat down that damn wall you've put around your heart. I want you to give me a chance, give us a chance.”
Allison brought her hands up to hold on to his wrists. “That wall has been crumbling since you kissed me.”
Jake stared for only a moment before easing down to capture her lips. “Tell me you'll give this a chance.”
Fear gripped her at the same time emotions overtook her, and tears pricked her eyes. “Where? You're going back to Florida and I don't know where I'll be.”
“Stay right here,” he told her. “I'll be right back.”
What? They were in the middle of a life-altering conversation and he needed…what? An intermission?
He dug into his toolbox, produced a small sack and went out the back door.
O-kay.
She watched out the window above the kitchen sink. Before long, Jake, along with all five of her fur babies, came out of the stables. When Jake stepped back into the house, the dogs came with him.
“Jake—” she started, but he cut her off with his hand.
“I know you don't want to get them used to being in the house, but trust me.”
She looked at the puppies, who were growing into their fat paws more each day.
Jake turned to the dogs. “Stay. Sit.”
Much to her surprise, each dog obeyed.
“How did you do that?” she asked.
Jake threw a charming smile over his shoulder. “I've been working with them a little.”
A little? She glanced down to the dogs and noticed something flashing on their necks.
“Are they wearing collars?” she asked.
Jake picked up one puppy, examined the collar and dog tag, and held it out to her. “Read it.”
Intrigued, she fingered the gold, bone-shaped tag. “Will,” she read aloud.
He put the dog down and picked up another, examining its tag before thrusting it at her.
“You,” she read.
Another dog was in her face just as fast.
She eyed the tag, saw the word and whispered, “Marry.”
Another white bundle of fur appeared in her blurry vision.
“Me,” she croaked.
He lifted the last puppy to her and she lifted its tag.
“Allison.”
With a hiccup, cry, laugh combo—God, she was a hot mess—she looked down at the obedient dogs and back to Jake, who stood with hope in his eyes.
“I don't have a ring,” he said apologetically. “I only had the tags made yesterday and wanted to keep them until I thought you were ready for the question. I guess I couldn't wait.”
Allison swiped at her damp cheeks. “What about your buyer?”
Jake shrugged. “I already told him the house was off the market.”
Shock had Allison taking a step back. “You're kidding. When did you tell him?”
“A few days ago. I knew I couldn't sell this farm. These horses need this land, need you. I need you.”
“Are you sure you'll be content with living on a farm?” she asked. “This couldn’t be further from what you're used to, and I'm pretty set in my ways.”
Jake stepped forward, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her off the ground. “I better be included in those set ways, Allison, because I'm not going anywhere. You're going to teach me all about these horses, because I want to help rescue them and care for them with you.”
Allison wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed his cheeks, his forehead, his lips. “I love you, Jake. You'll be awesome with the horses.”
“Is that a yes?” he asked.
Allison kissed him again, squeezing him tight. “Definitely.”
“I do have one condition,” he told her, face void of all laughter.
“What?”
“Swear to me right now you won't fling manure at me again.”
Allison laughed, squeezing him tighter still. “I can't guarantee that. What if you make me mad?”
He kissed her hard, deep. “I have better ways to blow off steam.”