Lone Star Courtship (14 page)

Where his future had been without promise there was now bright possibility.

Where he'd refused to make decisions for his life there were now choices that demanded action.

Where there had been a relationship that seemed to be going nowhere, there was now at least one that could go anywhere.

He climbed off the bed, pulled a robe over his pajamas and moved into the sitting room. He needed the one thing that was in short supply. The one thing that was running out and couldn't be replaced.

Time.

He slipped his cell phone from the pocket of the pink hotel robe, pressed a programmed key and waited for the transatlantic connection. What was there to say? How honest was he prepared to be and what was the point in phoning otherwise?

The point was to buy time, if only a day or two.

“Hello?” The connection was made.

Barrett hesitated.

“Yes, hello, is anyone there?”

“Good morning.”

“Son! How are you?”

Barrett's heart immediately felt lighter at the sound of his father's voice. He wasn't sure what the outcome of the conversation would be but he knew he'd made the right decision to phone.

“Very well, Father, all things considered.”

“I trust the Lone Star State hasn't gotten the better of you,” he joked.

“Not entirely, though there have been moments when I suspected the cuisine might.”

They shared a chuckle and then his father got straight to the point.

“So, fill me in on how the discovery is going with Hearth and Home.”

There it was. The opportunity to reveal all, to tell what he'd learned about himself and his fit within the firm. Here was the chance to ask for confirmation of his intentions. Even so, as close as Barrett felt he was to a final recommendation, there were still unanswered questions. If he exposed all he knew to his father now, what would the reaction be if he had a change of direction?

A change of heart?

“Jolly good, actually. It's been quite an enlightening visit with more than a few surprises. Not at all what I'd expected.”

“In a positive way, I trust.”

“Oh, yes. The team here has accommodated me far beyond expectations.”

“Smashing news. Your mum will enjoy a nice ‘I told you so' when you return. Now, tell me your impression of Guy Hardy? He has a stellar reputation.”

“That's one of the surprises I mentioned. Mr. Hardy only recently stepped down from his position to be replaced by another family member.”

“I respect your judgment, Barrett. If you're confident the replacement is equally adept, we're prepared to move forward as soon as you return.”

Casey was certainly qualified for many challenges, but the jury was still out—he smiled at his lame pun—where a final decision was concerned.

“I presume you will make it back on your scheduled flight.”

“That's the plan, but I might need to delay a bit.” Barrett set the stage to draw things out a while longer.

“Given your deliberate nature, I don't need to tell you to take your time. But we'd dearly love to have you back for your mum's birthday celebration. The entire family will be here.”

“Oh, yes.” Barrett thumped himself in the forehead with the heel of his hand. How could he have forgotten. Of course he couldn't delay. And, really, it was best to get on with it anyway. No point in putting off the inevitable. “Count on seeing me for sure then.”

“Will the beautiful Caroline be joining us, as well? It's about time you two made this courtship official, don't you think?”

Barrett's insides twisted as if a fist tightly gripped his gut. He'd only confided the embarrassing breakup to Sigmund, knowing his friend could be trusted with a private matter. But family, even the most discreet members who were professionally sworn to confidentiality, were likely to gossip.

And what was the answer to his father's question anyway? A week ago he'd fancied his relationship with Caroline had been on solid ground even if not a head-over-heels experience that filled the pages of paperback novels. And today he believed himself in love with a woman he'd only just met, an emotion that went against his very grain.

Was it better to be a public fool for love or a private one for convenience?

“I'm sorry. From your silence I can tell it's none of my concern.”

“Not true, Father. It's just that at the moment I can't speak to your questions because I don't have the answers.”

“Ah…”

Barrett could imagine the silver head nodding, appreciating even if not fully understanding the dilemma.

“My boy, a fork in the path is to be expected in life. But it often produces growth and builds character, so don't wish it away. Pray for discernment and let your mum and me know if we can help with your choices.”

Barrett closed his eyes and let his head fall back against the leather sofa. George Elliot had said, “It's our choices that show what we are, far more than our abilities.”

What would his choices ultimately say about him to his God, to his family, to the woman he loved?

T
he prospect of seeing Casey turned Barrett's insides to mint jelly. He was a young boy again, unable to find the words to express the powerful tugging at his heart-strings. In the night he'd awakened several times, replayed Caroline's message in his memory, considered the words of his father, searched his spirit for honest intentions and prayed for clarity.

His conclusion was the same each time; the Heavenly Father had brought Barrett to this place and this moment intentionally. But the question remained whether the intent was identifying his role in the family or finding the love of his life.

The options seemed to be at cross-purposes.

As shards of light began to streak the sky through the window of his suite, anticipation for the day ahead had him fidgeting. He drummed his fingers on the rim of his empty coffee cup and stared at the notes on the table before him. The list of pros and cons was beginning to paint an undeniable picture, taking a form that couldn't be ignored. How was he going to put this decision aside long enough to enjoy what might be his last day with his lady love? And if he succeeded in pushing business to the back of his mind, how would he ever come to the right conclusion?

It would be a test of his patience as well as his strength. Forty years of life had given him some measure of maturity. If only he could harness it today and conduct himself like a man deserving of the degrees and licenses hanging on his office wall. He'd never truly felt like that pedigreed individual and today was no exception. How could one have a career built on evidence and then for something as unstable and unpredictable as love let intelligence swirl down the plug hole?

Love.

He was in love.

His temples throbbed in time with the beating of his heart as his insides churned. The cacophony of conflicting symptoms was as painful as it was joyful. He glanced down at his chest, certain the pounding could be seen through his clothes. He was relieved to see the soft knit of his navy collared shirt lying flat, undisturbed.

“It's a good job I'm off this island and out of this state tomorrow. I'm too old for these physical sensations. Surely they'll pass as quickly as they overtook me.”

But as he spoke the words out loud he knew beyond a reasonable doubt he was wrong.

“You are such a doofus,” Savannah announced as she breezed through the room carrying a laundry basket.

Casey let the curtain fall back into place and stepped away from the window. She'd been strategically positioned to keep an eye on the parking lot without being seen from outside for nearly an hour.

“What?” She feigned ignorance.

“Oh, save the round-eyed innocence for Barrett. I saw you over there like a guard in the watchtower. The prisoner will be here any minute, Warden, so come eat your breakfast.”

“That obvious, huh?” Casey followed instructions and moved into the kitchen where her untouched meal waited on the island.

“Why do you bother trying to hide your feelings from me after all these years?” Savannah propped her basket on one knee and slid back the louver that concealed a small laundry space. “And more importantly, why do you still deny them yourself?”

Casey perched on the tall stool and toyed with her cottage cheese and berries. Her friend had asked a simple question. Too bad there wasn't an easy answer.

“Will you settle for an ‘I don't know'?”

“Will you?” Savannah dumped powdered detergent into the machine, spun a dial and closed the lid. She turned, folded her arms and leaned against the washer.

“Will you go on pretending that making your daddy proud and making your brother eat your dust is what life is all about? Even now that you know for certain there's a better reason than a big-box store to get up in the morning?”

“That's not fair,” Casey protested.

“Forget fair. It won't be fair when Barrett takes off tomorrow and you're alone again. But it'll be reality. I hope all that ambition of yours will be good company. Giving up the best chance you may ever have for happiness is a high price to pay for success.”

Casey shoved her bowl away and dropped her face into her hands. What had been excitement moments earlier was turning to dread.

“Savannah, I've had my career mapped out forever. Of all people, you can't possibly expect me to put it aside just because a man I've known for a few days has gotten under my skin,” Casey insisted. Even as she spoke the words she knew the argument was a waste of time. Still, she had to at least make the effort. If she couldn't convince her best friend she knew the right path to take, how could she convince herself?

“Have it your way, but there's a reason why the heebie-jeebies are back and I don't believe it has anything to do with allergies or stress. You feel threatened by Barrett and you have since the moment he drove onto the lot. He has some authority you can't control. And now, whether he knows it or not, he has power over your heart. He's determined to make an informed decision about the business. For heaven's sake, honey, don't let him fly blind about the personal.”

“What are you suggesting?” She raised her head, hoping to glean some wisdom.

Savannah stepped to the opposite side of the countertop and leaned down so they were elbow to elbow, eye to eye.

“I'm not suggesting, I'm saying it outright. You've always seized opportunity. And you've never shied away from tough situations that called for the truth. Tell that man you care before it's too late. He needs to hear the words you said to me last night. If you let him leave without taking that chance, you will second guess yourself for the rest of your life.”

“You think so?”

“I know so.”

“Allow me, Casey.”

Barrett stepped behind her and gave a sharp tug to tighten the life preserver strap. He turned her to face him and straightened the orange vest that was puffed up around her chin.

“Much better,” he assessed, then placed a reassuring hand to the small of her back as he steered her toward the dock.

His voice was so calm, so full of patience. But somehow it only made Casey more ill at ease. He'd been treating her like an unpredictable child or a skittish animal since she'd greeted him at her door an hour earlier. Was she that obvious, that pitiful?

“Does it need to be so tight?” she complained, slipping her hand beneath the flotation device to ease the tension against her ribs.

“Only if you want it to function properly in the event we capsize.”

“What are the odds of that?”

He tipped his head back to study the morning sky. It was clear of clouds, a pallet of blue streaked with a hundred hues of red, orange and yellow. A watercolor masterpiece from God's own hand.

“You can count on a warm spray but the chances of taking a dip this morning are slim to none. All you need to do is follow instructions and relax while somebody else takes the helm.”

She came to an abrupt stop at the edge of the boardwalk and refused to budge.

“You, Savannah and Cooper. If another person tells me to loosen up I'm going to turn around and go back to the condo.”

“Not a chance, Miss Hardy.” Barrett stepped onto the wooden planks, slipped his hands beneath her arms and lifted her effortlessly up to join him. Instead of moving away he pulled her nearer, pressed her life vest to his and brought his face close. He hovered above her, their eyes mere inches apart.

“You will not get away from me without a struggle. I intend to have you near me for as long as possible.” His voice was husky.

“Until tomorrow, you mean.” She needed perspective.

“I mean what I said. For as long as possible.”

His lips met hers. The urgency of his kiss was undeniable. A rush of pleasure surged as she closed her eyes and molded perfectly into his arms. The plastic puffiness between them squeaked as she pressed her palms to his back, pulling him as close as the decency of broad daylight permitted.

Certain they were becoming a source of interest at the busy marina, Casey prudently loosened her hold on Barrett and withdrew from the ardent kiss. Still, he was close enough for his breath to be a whisper against her cheek.

“Barrett, my world has flipped over on its edge since the moment you parked that land yacht on my property last Monday.”

“That confession gives me great comfort,” he murmured.

“Then why don't I feel the same? Instead of peace there's a swarm of helplessness buzzing in my head. A revelation like this should fill me with joy, not scare me to death.”

“A revelation like what?”

Tension hummed between them as he waited for her answer.

She couldn't see his face, could only imagine the darkened intensity of his eyes as his cheek pressed close to hers.

Could she say it? Did she dare? Savannah was right.

This might be her only chance. It was not in her DNA to let it slip past without grasping for the prize. She had to speak the words, especially while he couldn't see her face.

“I love you,” she breathed, relieved to have the secret out.

A silent moment passed.

“Beg pardon?”

“You're joking, right?” There was no way she'd laid her heart bare and he hadn't heard.

“No, sorry.” He raised his head, looked down into her face with an apologetic smile. “Your curls were against my ear and I didn't catch what you said. Tell me again about this revelation.”

Maybe it was a sign. She'd said the wrong thing and mercifully been given a do-over.

Then Guy's words came back to her. On the day he'd shared his decision to wed he'd cautioned his baby sister not to be blinded by ambition, not to forget what mattered most in life. Hadn't Savannah said as much today when she'd warned Casey against waiting until it was too late to speak her feelings?

She searched the sparkling eyes above hers for encouragement. What she saw reflected emboldened her. She placed a palm on either side of his face and drew him in until the depths of his eyes and the invitation of his lips were only a breath away.

“I love you, Barrett.”

His response was to capture her mouth. The kiss was once again filled with an eagerness she'd never imagined possible. An illusive taste of what could be.

He ended the kiss, but lingered for several long moments with his forehead lightly resting on hers. Was it a gentle communing of souls, an effort to compose himself, or a gathering of courage?

So much depended on his next words.

“Ah, my unpredictable Casey. Life will never be the same without you.”

Her spirit and her eyes stung. Her cheeks burned as if she'd been slapped. He'd given no acknowledgment of her love, no encouragement for the future. Instead he'd silenced her with a cunning tool.

His kiss.

Life will never be the same without you.

Which was lawyer-speak for life goes on and you will not be part of it.

Enough said. She'd hung her heart out there and he'd swatted it like a cheap piñata. Well, if he thought she'd fall apart like some adoring female who needed a man to pick up the broken pieces, he could think again. She turned about-face and began a determined march toward the slip where the rented sailboat waited.

“I'll work on being more predictable today,” she tossed over her shoulder.

She didn't dare let him see her face, with the crimson streaks of shame snaking up her neck, inflaming her skin. She snatched off her Cowboy Cartel cap and swiped at the curls that dangled in her eyes, dabbing away tears that threatened to spill over her lashes.

“Man, it's gonna be a hot one.” She fanned herself with the cap before pulling it low on her forehead. “Good thing I put on plenty of sunscreen.” She buffed her palms over her cheeks as if rubbing in lotion that had been carefully applied before the mirror that morning. Her cover-up was almost complete. She slid a new pair of SeaSpecs up over her eyes and snapped the elastic band around the back of her head.

Stopping beside slip number eleven, she pretended to admire the sleek craft bobbing in the chop from the recent passing of an outboard. She was prepared to do anything to cover her gaff, to pretend her admission had been delivered with as little care and thought as Barrett had used to acknowledge it.

If they took a dunk, she'd laugh it off like a good sailor. She'd let the beauty of the sea and sky begin to heal the deep wound in her heart.

And she'd prove she could let go of the reins and let somebody else take charge if it killed her!

For the fourth time in as many days, Barrett found himself in catch-up mode with the long-legged brunette who was so bent on doing everything her way.
She
chose when and how to express her feelings.
She
made all the decisions, called all the shots.
She
had all the necessary training and credentials, so a mentor was of no value in her eyes.