Shay
Me First and the Blue Hawaii
Ford is a sexy beast, wearing a black long sleeve tee, black jeans, and boots. Fearsome and gorgeous, he radiates heat as we drive to City by Night. The evening grows cold during the ride and only Ford keeps me from shivering by the time we arrive. A few blocks from their house, Pax sped ahead of us and is now waiting in the parking lot.
“What’s the point of you ditching us,” Ford asks him once we arrive, “if you’re just going to sit around and wait in the end?”
Pax shrugs. “I don’t plan shit. You know that.”
The brothers don’t share many features, but they both look sexy dressed all in black. Their thick beards make them appear a little scary too. As we enter the retro-style club with flickering lights on the black ceiling, women check out the brothers while men avoid making eye contact. The only men willing to look at them also sport beards. I suspect they’re in the club too, but it’s not like they’re flashing signs or wearing matching jackets.
I feel underdressed in blue jeans, white tee, and red flannel shirt. Most of the women are wearing dresses. Casual, but classy, they make me feel like a dude hanging with my pals.
“Slugger, Home Run,” says a bearded man, walking towards us after we’re seated.
Ford gestures at me. “Bull, this is Shay.”
“Ah, Lucky’s kid. Jenn told Lupe all about her.”
“What’d she say?” Ford asks.
Bull scratches at his beard. “Twenty years ago, Lucky went to Hawthorne to visit his mom and met a cutie who lied about her age. He saw her a decade later and found out he had a kid, but the cutie didn’t want him around. Over the years, Lucky checked in. When he saw his girl needing a fresh start, he brought her out here. Sweet story. Heartwarming even.”
Frowning, I know the story isn’t true. Mom said my dad was one of a several guys she did at a party one weekend. She thought I looked like the one with the big ears, but she didn’t know any of their names and couldn’t track them down for child support. Though Mom lied to herself about how Donnie would leave his wife and marry her, she never lied to me. I suspect protecting her feelings were always more important than protecting mine.
“I think I see Lucky in her.”
Shrugging, I give into the lie. “Thanks.”
Bull whispers something to the brothers about business then leaves to check on other customers. Once he’s gone, I look over the menu.
“The fish tacos are good,” Ford says, leaning over to nuzzle my neck.
Ford’s cologne has a spicy quality. My body responding to the scent, I imagine nuzzling my face against the hairs on his chest.
Grunting, Pax stares at his menu. “Wouldn’t think Shay needs help ordering. Didn’t she used to take care of her little brothers? You know, before she ditched them when she got a better deal with Lucky.”
His comment kicks the confidence out of me. Ford has a different reaction. He leans over and whispers to me.
“I just think you ought to fix your hair.”
Sitting up straight, he continues, “So, Shay, go use the girls’ room while I threaten my brother with violence.”
I stand up and look at each of them. Pax is grumpy. Ford pretends he’s not. My stomach is in a knot and I now feel guilty. Leaving them to do whatever the hell they do together, I go to the restroom.
My hair is a bit messy from the ride over. I fix it then sit in a stall and call my brothers. Donnie answers right away and sounds tense.
“I have a test this week,” he says.
“You always stress, but you get good grades. It’ll be okay.”
“Devin might flunk third grade.”
“He wasn’t flunking when I left and that was only a few weeks ago. He’ll be okay too.”
“Mom and Dad had a fight. She’s been crying a lot. We haven’t had dinner in two days.”
His voice is edgy, so I keep mine extra smooth. “You know how to use the microwave.”
“We’re almost out of stuff to make. Mom went shopping a week ago. I don’t know when she’ll go again.”
“Tell her she needs to feed you. Don’t be soft on her. She’s the adult.”
“She does what she wants. Just like you.”
Sighing, I say nothing for a minute. When I speak, it’s a struggle not to cry. “Maybe you can visit this summer? The house I’m staying in has a park down the street. I also heard about a nearby hotel with an indoor water park.”
After a long silence, Donnie whispers, “I miss you. Things were better when you were here.”
“I know and I miss you too, but Mom needs to be a grownup and take care of her family.”
“Can I tell Devin we might get to visit you? He cried a lot last night when we had a thunderstorm and you weren’t here. I think he misses you more, so can I tell him?”
“Of course and tell him I plan to visit too. I just need to save up money.”
Donnie’s demeanor changes immediately. “I was just kidding about my test. I think I’ll get a B.”
After we talk more about his math test, I tell him I love him. He sounds so young when he says it back. I hang up then sit for another few minutes, thinking about my brothers and an empty fridge. If I hadn’t left, they’d have food and someone to help them study. When Devin got scared last night, I could have held him until the storm passed. Instead, I walked away from my life on an impulse.
Ford and Pax listen as a band plays a rock version of
Little More Satisfaction
. They don’t look upset, but Ford seems relieved when I join them.
“I thought you made a run for it,” he says before kissing just behind my ear.
“Sorry. I called and checked on my brothers.”
Ford shoots Pax a dirty look. For his part, Pax ignores us and watches the band.
“He’s sorry for being an asshole. He told me.”
“Did you have to threaten him first?” I ask.
Ford smirks. “Does it really matter?”
Smiling at him, I shake my head. “After dinner, are you taking me home?”
“No,” he says casually then leans back and focuses on the band.
“I’m running out of clothes.”
“Go naked.”
A smirking Pax shakes his head. “Anything is better than the flannel.”
Glaring at his brother, Ford sighs. “I want to hurt you and I tend to get what I want.”
“Are you talking to her or me?”
Ford narrows his eyes then suddenly smiles. “When I hit you, your face will cave in enough for you to see what an asshole you are.”
Pax glances at me then back at his brother. “I’m sensing you might like this broad more than the thousands of broads you’ve nailed before.”
I know I shouldn’t laugh, but I do. They’re so stupid and adorable together. Ford and Pax are scary guys. Yet they sound just like Donnie and Devin fighting in the backseat over the Nintendo DS.
Smiling at my laughter, Ford runs his hand down the back of my hair. The gesture relaxes me as always. More than relaxed, I feel a warm flutter in my gut. I’m falling hard for a man who might not be capable of falling too.
“What’s your thing with flannel?” Pax asks as the salads arrive. “Do they remind you of an old boyfriend?”
Ford grunts at this question while I’m more interested in the raisins in my salad. He notices my frown.
“Bull’s had a raisin obsession ever since eating at some place in Chicago. Eat around them if they gross you out.”
I take a bite and shrug. “Not bad. Hey, how come he called you Slugger and Home Run? Like how did you get those nicknames?”
“We like bats,” Pax says darkly, clearly trying to intimidate me.
I wipe at the side of my mouth. “You have something right here.”
Pax wipes too, but I’m just fucking with him. Figuring this out, he rolls his eyes. Ford grins at his brother’s irritation.
“I started wearing flannel when I moved here.”
“A whole two weeks ago, huh?” Pax says.
“Yeah. I didn’t want guys looking at me and thinking about sex.”
Pax rolls his eyes. “Based on how loud you get when Ford fucks you, I’d say you failed.”
“I used to wear heels,” I say, ignoring him. “My greatest accomplishment growing up was learning to walk in heels. Not just walk either, but run too. I’m an ace in heels. I miss wearing them actually.”
“I’ve shit greater accomplishments than that,” Pax mutters.
“Like what?”
Pax flips me off. “I’m not sharing my personal shit with you.”
Ford laughs at his brother’s whining then leans over and says, “I bet you look hot in a pair of heels.”
“Maybe I’ll do a striptease for you one day.”
Ford’s smile fades as he imagines us in his bedroom. I see the hunger in his eyes and brush my lips against his. Not only do I love how much Ford wants me, but I really enjoy how our flirting annoys Pax.
“If I see a cute pair of heels, I’ll buy them,” I whisper.
Ford grins. “Eat your salad. You’ll need the energy for later.”
Returning to our salads, we listen to the band perform their version of
Hound Dog
. By the time our tacos arrive, Pax says he’s depressed.
“No, you’re not,” Ford replies.
“I could be. I’m capable of depression.”
“I’ve never seen you depressed and I’ve seen you every day of your life.”
Pax scrapes his fork against the plate. “I was likely depressed when you weren’t looking. Maybe while taking a dump or fucking a chick or jerking off in the shower.”
Ford laughs while I roll my eyes.
Pax sighs. “Insensitive.”
“You’ve been an ass since we got here. Don’t pout now.”
“Hey, let me say something nice about Shay and she can do the same about me. Sounds good, huh? Let me think. Oh, I know. I like how Shay keeps my brother’s cock happy. She’s a great lay.”
Ford’s smile fades and I think he might throw a punch. The brothers are difficult to read, but their playing is veering close to violence.
“My turns,” I say, ignoring Ford. “I like how Pax is growing as a person. He realized he gets depressed whenever his dick is exposed. Signs of shame maybe.”
Pax narrows his eyes at me then shrugs. “I liked how you wailed on Creepy Spencer. Made my dick hard.”
Ford stands up and walks over to his brother. Leaning down, he whispers something. Pax’s expression shifts from annoyance to anger to amusement. Ford returns to his seat and looks at me.
“Pax is being an asshole and I can’t fix that. However, I can think of a way to make you feel better later.”
Grinning, I scratch at his inner thigh then focus on my food. We all eat quietly as the band plays and people talk nearby.
“This is so good. Thank you for bringing me here.”
Ford smiles at me then glances at his brother who looks ready to start shit. Pax keeps his mouth shut and we fall into silence again for another ten minutes.
“The girl I met the other night at the hotel texted me. We’re going to have lunch tomorrow.”
“Bebe, right?”
Pax snorts. “Rednecks will name their kids anything.”
“You have a point, Pax.”
“Mom isn’t a redneck.”
“True, she’s more of a hillbilly.”
“I believe she preferred the term ‘mountain folk.’ Something with mountain anyway.”
The brothers share a grin then Ford scoots his chair closer to mine. “The next set will be loud and I don’t want you getting scared.”
Leaning my head against his chest, I bat my eyes. “It’s sexy when you act protective.”
“Not an act. I protect what’s mine.”
Pax frowns. “He even protects temporary shit. Like when we watched the neighbor’s yippy dog.”
Ignoring Pax’s comment, I get how Ford and I aren’t forever. Hell, we might not last until next week. Even though losing him will tear me apart, I plan to savor the time we have left. Based on his hungry gaze, Ford’s savoring it too.
Ford
No Games
Shay’s walking on air when we leave City by Night. I love showing her off to people. She’s lovely and she’s mine. I can’t imagine what it’ll be like when our relationship is over and she hates me. I refuse to imagine her looking at me with anger. Instead, I focus on her current smiles and forget the rest. We could all be dead tomorrow, so I plan to enjoy the now.
At the house, Shay walks to my bedroom while I grab us drinks from the fridge. Pax joins me, wearing a frown.
“Shay passed my test, but she won’t like when you dump her. I see a future of her clawing out your eyes. Crotch destruction too. I won’t blame her. Teasing a young girl like that is a dick move.”
I roll my eyes and hand him a beer. “Fuck you and your test. Shay’s not a girl and she knows the score. We like hanging out. I dig her for more than the fucking too. Let it go.”
“You haven’t had a girlfriend since high school.”
“No, since I joined the club. I saw a short life ahead of us. I’m not Joker who can pretend he’s living a normal Joe life. Fuck, he played that game twice.”
“Didn’t work out well for Big Dick, did it?”
I shove him back against the fridge, making him smile. “No and nothing’s changed for us. I just want this chick and you being an asshole to her won’t change anything.”
“Fine. I’ll tolerate her better. Even treat her with a level of respect like I would a waitress or the cleaning lady.”
Rolling my eyes again, I leave him to watch a movie with Folgers. In my room, Shay’s spread out on the bed facing the TV. Smiling, she rolls onto her back and swings her bare feet in the air.
“I should be bored of sex by now, but I can’t get enough of you.”
“Orgasms will do that,” I say, setting down the drinks and kicking off my boots.
“You smell good. Taste good. When you touch me, I feel different. I think the orgasms are the cherry on top.”
Staring at Shay, I wonder where she’s going with her praise. Are we heading for a relationship talk? Does she want promises? I can promise her anything, but they’ll be lies.
Focused on her feet, Shay doesn’t notice my frown. “I really need a pedicure. If I’m going to wear heels again, I can’t have such grungy nails.”
Realizing Shay’s praise is just chatter, I want to relax. Except I can’t. My initial relief is replaced by annoyance. Are Pax and I all wrong about how Shay will react when the fun ends? Is her time with me meaningless?
During moments when I feel her completely open to me, I imagine her declaring her love. Yet right now, I wonder if she’s only a young woman having fun. Maybe I’m reading too much shit into her behavior. Am I the one falling for someone with no intention of sticking around?
“I better not waste money on a pedicure, if I want to save up for my brothers to visit,” Shay says, rolling back onto her stomach. “Or I might visit them.”
“Have them visit,” I mutter, removing my shirt and gaining Shay’s attention. “If you visit, your mom will make the visit about her.”
Shay reaches for me when I sit on the bed. “Makes sense. You smell so good.”
“I have a meeting in the morning.”
“Okay,” she says, nuzzling my neck.
“I’ll drop you off then pick you up later for dinner.”
“Uh-huh.”
Her lips caress my shoulder as she inhales my scent. She’s damn irresistible when she reacts in such an open way. Nothing seductive about her at all. I never want her playing games with me. Other chicks can lie and scheme, but not my Shay.