Read Leaving Normal Online

Authors: Stef Ann Holm

Leaving Normal (30 page)

There was always a way out, a clear path to a resolution. He'd learned that in the fire academy. No matter how intense a fire was, no matter how difficult it might be to see through the smoke, there had to be an option to get out. He may not see the solution right away, but it was there.

Natalie's lips parted, her breathing grew slower. She wasn't sleeping, she was just in a state of pure relaxation. It made him smile.

She made him smile.

He rubbed her other foot, focusing on her ankle, kneading her calf, running his hand under her jeans leg. He slid her socks off. They were a thick blue. She didn't protest their removal, just increased a breath to pull in a deep drink of oxygen.

Her bare feet were cute. She painted her toes. Ruby pink. He liked the shape of her feet, the softness of her skin. She was soft. Really soft.

And she smelled amazing.

He smelled no bitterness, simply sugar. Sweet sugar from flowers.

He watched the rise and fall of her breasts, the way her pulse beat at the base of her throat. Her skin was awash in the muted light of his lamps that burned low in the living room.

He'd bought furniture. Not much. A sofa and chair, a kitchen table. He had to keep things simple for now. The divorce lawyer and court fees set him back financially, not so bad he was hurting, but his salary couldn't afford to refurnish an entire house in one month.

Having Natalie here felt right, felt nice.

He was more mentally tired than physically. He had to be at work tomorrow by seven. But after years on the job, he never slept deep and hard anymore. Sometimes he did if he was completely burned out, but that was rare.

Tony eased himself onto the sofa, sat beside Natalie and put his arm around her. She opened her eyes, exhaled a slow breath and gazed at him through the heaviness of her lashes.

She smiled. "Hello."

The greeting was simple, but uttered in a sexy-sleepy voice, one that had his arm curl around her and bring her flush against his chest. In the hollow of her collarbone, where the skin was soft, he rubbed his thumb on the exposed area at the crook of her neck.

She was overtly feminine in ways he was masculine rough. Her skin was smooth, like the texture of a rose petal; his jaw and cheeks were rough from a day's growth of beard.

He cupped her cheek, caressed her ear and jaw, gazed into her eyes and angled his forehead to touch hers.

Pulling in a breath, he did think and wonder about her. About them. Where this would go.

But the thoughts were quickly diminished when he brought his mouth over hers and gave her a slow and arousing kiss that trapped his heartbeat, causing his breath to come out in a muted hiss. Heat expanded in his lungs. He angled his head to take her parted lips fully, completely. His tongue slipped inside her mouth, danced with hers.

Natalie's body arched to his. His fingers tightened around the curve of her shoulder, pulling her closer as he eased back on the sofa's cushions, taking her with him so that she lay on top of him.

Her arms lifted and fit snugly around his neck as she kept him close. As their tongues touched, discovered, he tasted her warmth, the moist heat in her mouth. Her lips were so soft; they fit perfectly next to his. Exploring, arousing, tempting.

His hands slid down her back, slowly tracing the curves of her waist and hips. He cupped her behind, keeping her next to him. A hard heaviness pooled in his groin.

He wanted far more than to taste her mouth. He imagined what she would be like naked, envisioned the shape of her breasts and curve of her bare waist. The swell of her hips, the patch of hair between her legs.

Raw with need, it took every ounce of control not to undress her.

He could do just this. Kissing. Savor it. Her lips pressed against his. Her tongue sliding over his.

His fingers tingled, he felt her trembling. So it wasn't just him. She was affected, too. This was different, he knew it.

His mouth grazed her soft skin at the corners of her lips. He nipped and sucked her lower lip, teasing. She moaned. He didn't loosen his hold on her, kept her pelvis to his. Hard. Firm. Unrelenting.

He lost himself in his wants, her needs. Kissing. Just kissing.

The enjoyment of it was pure and new. He lost track of time.

When he released her mouth, she gasped for breath and he let her go. She rolled onto her side, tucked her head in the crook of his shoulder and laid her arm over his chest.

"You kiss…good," was all she managed, her breathing choppy.

His every muscle felt taut, tense—but with a pleasure-pain that he held in check.

"You kiss good," he said, a smile on his mouth. He pushed her hair from her forehead, held her tight and tried to slow his breathing down.

"I've never been kissed like that before," she admitted in a wondrous tone.

That broadened his smile. "I'm glad."

"Me, too. Sort of. Makes me want it some more."

He chuckled. "Okay."

She looked at him. "But not right this second. I have to catch my breath… I have to…" She brought a hand to his cheek, touched him. "You are so damn good-looking."

"So are you."

"Oh…God, no. It's you." She licked her lips, sucked on the lower one as if to taste him there. "You're good-looking and young and… what am I doing here?"

"You're relaxing."

"If this is relaxing, I don't ever want to stop."

He smoothed her hair, brought her closer. "Close your eyes. Feel your heartbeat. Remember how it feels to relax."

"Mmm."

Stroking her hair, the shell of her ear, he kept her next to him until the last thing he consciously remembered was the sweet fragrance of roses curling in his lungs, taking him to places he had never been before. Giving him good thoughts to close his eyes to.

Peace and contentment washed over him.

And at last, he slept. Soundly. Deeply.

With Natalie Goodwin in his arms.

Chapter Seventeen

 

For Here or To Go?

 

"Austin, stop it…I'm trying to study." Cassie's plea for him to stop nibbling on her ear didn't have much of a threat to it. She liked it when he kissed her like that, but she really was trying to memorize her notes for an art history test.

They were in her dorm room lying side by side on the narrow bed, shoes off and their legs entwined. She wore crew socks and so did Austin; he kept rubbing the top of her foot with his toes.

"But you taste so good," he said, his breath warm against her skin.

"Mmm." Her moan was covered by his mouth over hers and he was on top of her before she could protest.

Their make-out sessions had been getting progressively more carried away. She didn't know how much longer she could hold out. She thought she loved him, maybe not "in love," but she did love him.

She'd only known him a short time, but she'd fallen hard.

She recalled that day at orientation when she'd first seen him. He wasn't her usual type. Tall, thin, quiet in ways she was outgoing. He had spiky hair, a crooked nose and slightly crooked teeth. The clothing style he chose wasn't what she'd ever pick out. Baggy pants, big sweatshirts. But he had a great body underneath. He'd been on the high-school gymnastics team. That "pretty boy" sport didn't seem to fit him, but he'd done well and had taken home a state-championship medal in two events.

He didn't hang with the popular crowd at school, didn't care about that. Which was what drew her to him. She'd never been one of the "It Girls" in high school; thought they were stuck up, and most of them were on birth control and not virgins.

She loved the color of his eyes. They were gray, like the silver lead of a pencil—expressive as if he could create scenes with a glance, a look. She couldn't define it— but when he looked at her, she melted. Just melted.

And when he kissed her…

She kissed him right back.

His tongue entered her mouth, his hand fell on her breast and he squeezed. Then he did that thing with his palm, lower, between her legs. He was the first boy she'd ever
really
made out with. She'd never had a steady boyfriend before and she liked it.

Austin in her life was almost crazy-reckless when she let herself go.

And she knew where this was going if she didn't stop him.

But sometimes it was hard to stop.

Her cell phone rang and its chirp immediately sobered her. She sat upright, grabbed the phone and punched the answer button.

"Hello?" she said, breathless.

"Cassie?"

"Mom. Hi."

"Were you running?"

"Urn, no."

Austin kept his hand on her hip, slid his fingers down her arm and he did those little motions with his thumb around her navel. She jerked back, frowned at him.

"I was calling to see how you're doing." Her mom's voice was clear and warm, genuinely interested. It would have been easy to fib about not having time to talk if her mom didn't sound so nice.

"Good. Been busy." Cassie got off the bed so Austin couldn't touch her anymore. "There's a trip to the museum next week and I signed up to go. It should be fun."

"I'm glad to hear that. And your grades? You're studying hard?"

"Yes. That's what I was doing when you called." She slid her gaze to Austin, who snapped his textbook closed, got up and waved goodbye while walking toward the door.

She waved him back, urged him to stay. "Um, Mom…I really need to get back to the books. I don't mean to cut you short but, you know…"

"All right, honey. Send me an e-mail when you get a chance."

"I will. Okay, Mom. I gotta go. Love you."

"I love you, too, Cassie."

Cassie finished the call, went to Austin. "Don't leave!"

"You were on the phone."

"I got off." She put her arms around him, kissed him.

"But I really do have to study," she murmured against his soft lips, liking how they felt on her mouth.

"You can study me."

He kissed her back and the next thing she knew, they were on her bed again.

She wished she had more willpower, but the way he made her feel, it was like fighting nature.

In those few minutes, he had her bra hiked up and he was unzipping her jeans.

Cassie gained enough composure to put her hand on his. "Austin, no. I'm not ready. I told you…no."

He jerked way without argument, sat up and ran his hands through his hair. "Cassie, sometimes you really make me nuts. You know you want to."

Panic filled her, along with a thread of fear. She'd pushed him away again. Maybe one too many times now—he'd find another girl to be with. There were plenty of them on campus and he was so cute.

Sitting up, Cassie put her arms around him. "Austin, I'm sorry. I don't mean to make you nuts. I feel the same things for you, but I'm just not ready to take things further. It's a big step for me. I'm a virgin, you know that. I'm not like the other girls you've been with…"

He took her face in his hands. "I know. That's what I love about you, Cass. You're so sweet. You're just too cute."

She smiled, pleased. Happy. Very happy.

"I'm hungry," she announced, in the mood for a sub. "Let's take a break and go to Chicago Carryout."

"I don't have any money."

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