Lakota Surrender (24 page)

“Tahiska!”

He faced about.

They were not close in distance, yet their eyes met and held as though they were no more than a few inches apart.

Neither could tell who made the first move. It didn’t matter. They came together, and Tahiska lifted her off her feet, twirling her around and around.

“I’m sorry,” she cried.

“Shh… I acted badly,” he told her in Lakota.

She freed her right hand to sign, “Did you divorce me?”

“No, I think I would die inside,” he signed. “Then you admit that we are married?”

“No, I…”

He laughed. “Ah, my wife,” he spoke in Lakota. “I think I will enjoy wearing your resistance down.”

They smiled at one another. It was the first tender smile they had shared since their wedding night.

“Kristina,” he muttered. “I do not wish to lose you.”

And though she couldn’t understand the words, when his lips met hers she knew he still loved her. They tasted one another in a kiss that was wild, fueled by their anger and their love.

When at last he broke off the kiss, Tahiska ran his hands furiously over her curves. “I could not leave you, Kristina. I, too, lied when I told you I could. To leave you would be as to cut off my right arm.”

“I will do my best to be truthful, Tahiska,” Kristina promised, unable to understand his words. “And I will never lie to you or betray you.”

They were both talking at once, neither understanding the other.

“I want to make love to you.” Tahiska signed this. “But I cannot. We are not alone. I fear my business at the fort has been put aside for too long. We will be unable to lie with each other again until it is finished.”

“No!”

“Unless you do not mind my cousin and friend being about, we will have to wait.”

“I…”

Tahiska brushed her hair back from her face. “It is all right. I thought you would be too shy.” He smiled at her before he kissed her again. This time the kiss was as sweet and as delightful as honey nectar.

“Come,” he gathered her in his arms. “We still need to talk.” He wouldn’t let her go. They walked back to the stream arm in arm.

“It was wrong of me to judge you.” They reclined together by the stream. Tahiska leaned back against a rock while Kristina sat between his legs. She was turned in sideways so she could see his motions. She leaned in toward him. He had given her full liberty over him and she rejoiced in the freedom to hug him or to kiss him as often as she felt inclined, which was most of the time. He didn’t seem to mind for he was able to carry on a conversation despite the distraction. “I do not understand the white man’s world. Perhaps it is not possible to be truthful in your world. But if you were ever to return with me to my village, there are some things you would need to understand.” He chuckled and swerved his head around to taste her lips. She had been teasing him as he signed, raining kisses over his cheek and neck. “The Indian strives at all times,” he continued while Kristina caressed him everywhere, “to be perfectly honest. While some things are exaggerated, the facts of a matter must be perfectly accurate or one will become the ridicule of all, never to be trusted again. Perhaps in the white man’s world it is sometimes necessary to lie. It is a trait I have found that all white men of my acquaintance possess. But not the Indian. Even in gambling one must never cheat or lie. To do so is the same as inviting great humiliation.”

“I will remember,” she signed.

He laughed. “Did you understand all that I signed?”

“Yes,” she motioned back. “Do you wish me to say it back?”

He gazed down at her for several moments. And because he did not feel it necessary to hide his feelings, admiration and love warmed his eyes. His glance at her was as sweet as a caress.

“No,” he said at last. “I like where your hands are now better. Come here.” He clasped her to him. He nestled her head against his shoulder and rubbed her back as though she still weren’t close enough. “I do not know how I am going to make it through these next few weeks,” he said in Lakota. “For I love you truly and I wish to give you all of me.” He smiled and set her slightly away from him. “We have much to do, you and I,” he signed before her eyes.

Kristina stared at him blankly.

“You would not wish to meet my people without any knowledge of our ways, would you?” he asked in sign. “We must work quickly. I wish to teach you my language and I will learn yours. You have no suitable clothing for our outdoor life, nor are you skilled in the tanning of hides. I must teach you to survive on the prairie by yourself, if necessary, so you will learn to hunt and to swim. I cannot risk your life upon the river otherwise. If you were ever swept away, you would drown. I fear, my wife, that we have much to do.”

“You speak as though you expect me to return to your village. Have you not understood all that I have said? We are not truly married in the eyes of my church.”

“Where can we find this church? We will marry there, then.”

“I… Tahiska… We can’t. Didn’t we divorce? Besides, there is too much…”

“When I leave here to return to my own country, will you come with me?”

Kristina felt him tense beneath her fingers.

“I don’t know. I…”

He gathered her hands in one of his own before she could finish. “I do not wish to know more,” he spoke to her. “Perhaps one day you will come to me.”

Kristina gazed at him in fascination. She didn’t know what he’d said, yet she knew it was affectionate.

“I will look for you here tomorrow,” he signed.

“I will try. Much depends on Julia.”

“Must she ride out with you again?” he rotated his right hand.

“My father will no longer allow me to ride upon the prairie by myself. Since I told him my pony tripped he insists I be accompanied.”

“I understand.” Tahiska grinned. “I fear I have alarmed her. I mistook her intentions. I believed you did not wish to speak with me alone.”

Kristina laughed. “Perhaps it would do you well in the future if you could smile at her and not scowl as though you would admire her scalp upon your belt.”

Tahiska peered at Kristina, then grinning, his laughter joined that of his wife’s.

There was no mistaking the sounds of laughter. Julia shifted uneasily and gaped at the two Indians.

She hadn’t known Indians laughed. The Indians of her acquaintance never smiled; never once in her years at the fort had she seen one of them chuckle. If she thought of the Indian at all, she thought of a dour figure stoically reserved and often given to frowning.

Yet Wahtapah had grinned at her and Tahiska’s laughter sounded merry and infectious.

Julia pretended to look elsewhere, but under the shadow of her lashes she studied the two Indians before her. Both were young, tall, and could be considered to be handsome. Yet there was a wildness about them in the way they dressed, in the way they carried themselves, and in their style of life. Never, she decided, would she be attracted to an Indian.

Neeheeowee glanced up to catch Julia’s stare. His gaze pierced into hers and Julia, disconcerted, quickly looked away.

Neeheeowee continued to glower at the white woman long after she glanced away. Wahtapah caught the grimace of his friend and smiling secretly, bent his head to his chores.

“Never again!”

“But, Julia, you came to no harm.”

Julia rolled her eyes at her friend. They were both acting as clerks at the trading center. Though it was still morning, the summer sun shone brightly outside, clamoring and calling for attention. And with such competition, they found themselves alone inside the center.

“Yesterday I came to no harm because I was lucky.” She dusted some preserve jars on a shelf as she spoke, her back to Kristina. “Daniel Boone once said, ‘Beware the Indian, kind or unkind,’ and he lost family to the savages. I told myself that if I ever lived through that day, I would never, never let you talk me into seeing those Indians again. And here I stand in one piece and I intend to remain this way. You can see them all you want. Leave me out of it.”

“I see.” Kristina’s voice was wistful. “Did he really say that? Daniel Boone?”

Julia nodded.

“Then I guess I couldn’t entice you to come plum picking with me?”

“Plum picking?” Julia eyed her companion suspiciously. “Just that? No Indians?”

“Couldn’t we just visit them, if we’re at all close to their camp?”

“Kristina! One doesn’t just ‘drop in’ on Indians.”

“He has asked to see me.”

Julia set her feather duster aside. She took a deep breath and turned back toward her friend. “If I take you there, it is as though I condone your relationship, and I don’t.” Julia swallowed convulsively. “Kristina, as you said, it’s not as though you are truly married. There have been no vows spoken, no minister to witness your devotion, no marriage certificate. Do you wish me to witness your affair
?”

Kristina recoiled as though slapped. A delicate pink stained her cheeks.

“Do you gossip about me then?”

“Of course not!” Julia stepped forward a pace. She hesitated, then turned her back to her friend. “Kristina, he is Indian,” she said over her shoulder. “Someone has to tell you these things. You are gambling with your future. When I see you together, there’s a peace and harmony about you both that is…almost beautiful. I am afraid if you spend more time in his presence, we will lose you.”

“I love him.”

“I know.” Julia spun around to face her friend. “You say you are not married, yet I see more here than I think you care to admit. I believe you are flirting with danger, Kristina. Break the ties now, while the romance is still young. Allow yourselves the chance to find someone else within your own race.”

“And if there is no one else?”

Julia hesitated. “Nonsense!”

Kristina stared at her friend, her glance steady and direct.

Julia was silent. And in that glance, they formed an understanding. They both knew. They both grasped at what remained unsaid. What was between Kristina and the Indian was more than a burgeoning romance. It was love, as fragile as a drop of dew on a rose, as trusting as a flower opening its petals to the sun, as beautiful as the loyalty between friends.

Julia sighed, and with little movement, leaned her weight against the shelf. She said nothing, merely placing her hand against her forehead. She was quiet a long while. “All right,” she stated at length. “I will help you, though I do so against my better judgment. But I warn you, Kristina, I do not like these people; I believe they are savages and I will keep my distance. I do not want them talking to me and I will not acknowledge them. You must let them know of my displeasure.” She leaned away from the shelf, and spinning around, glared at her friend. “I do this only for you, Kristina. I will help you again, but I do not like it.” She picked up the front of her skirt, and without another word to Kristina, rushed from the room.

Kristina watched her friend hurry towards the livery. Once Julia turned around and Kristina could have sworn that there was sympathy in that gaze. But it was quickly gone and Julia hurried away.

Kristina felt the wetness in her eyes and brushed a hand across her brow in an attempt to lighten her mood. She knew Julia’s reaction was mild in comparison to what she could expect from others. That didn’t, however, make the message any less hurtful, nor her situation any more comfortable.

She gulped, finding her breathing unsteady and her hands shaking. Had she been wise to confide in Julia?

As Kristina turned to start the lengthy process of closing shop, she was struck with a singular, spectacular fact. Julia believed them bound. By what? Not by marriage, she had made that plain. What then? Love?

Kristina gasped. Had love already changed her life? She closed her eyes and sighing, decided to think of other things.

Kristina recoiled, dropping the bone needle, buckskin, and thread. “What…what did you say this was?” She motioned toward the thread.

Tahiska indicated his spine, making the sign for buffalo at the same time.

“It’s what? Buffalo sinew?” Kristina couldn’t control the shudder of disgust. She tried to cover it over, tried to smile, but her attempts were useless. Wiping her hands on her dress, she wished for some good cotton thread, rope—anything but buffalo sinew.

Tahiska regarded her with astonishment. If not sinew, what did the white man use for sewing? He asked her this in sign.

“We use…cotton,” she said aloud, then signed. “It is something we gather from a plant.”

“A plant, like the tall grasses? How can it be strong enough? Have you never noticed how grass bends with the wind? How easily it is cut? Perhaps because the white man builds his houses from wood, he doesn’t know the value of this thread.”

Kristina regarded the distasteful lengths of sinew. “We have thread that is just as strong. I will bring some tomorrow.” She cast a quick look toward Julia, who still lingered near the horses. “If I can, I will bring some then.”

Tahiska nodded, his gaze following Kristina’s. He glanced back at Kristina. “Your friend does not approve of us. Is it this which troubles you? It will be hard for you if she does not accompany you.”