L8r, G8r (12 page)

SnowAngel:

hey there, sweetie. what'd ya think of maddie's homeroom announcement?

zoegirl:

i thought it was funny, even tho it was totally unnecessary. but funny.

SnowAngel:

you reap what you sow, that's what i say. in fact maybe i'll make that my senior quote.

SnowAngel:

have you decided what your senior quote will be?

zoegirl:

no, but i'm not terribly worried about it since we have over two months to decide. i've got too many other things to worry about—ack!

SnowAngel:

well, to thank maddie for sticking up for us, i had a great idea: we shld invite ian to vincent's tonite. whaddaya think?

zoegirl:

uh, i think maddie would kill you

SnowAngel:

so i should go for it?

SnowAngel:

she really needs to start going out with ian again. he would be soooooo much better for her than vincent.

zoegirl:

you keep giving maddie a hard time about vincent, but i honestly don't think she's interested in him.

SnowAngel:

that's what SHE says. i want ian on her radar anyway.

zoegirl:

why do you not like vincent? just because he's buds with jana?

SnowAngel:

there is that, which is a huge strike against him. but it's more that i just don't wanna see her get in trouble again. like with chive.

zoegirl:

vincent's not chive, though

zoegirl:

i think you give her a hard time about vincent cuz she gives you a hard time about logan. that's what i think.

SnowAngel:

WHAT? plz.

zoegirl:

well … whatever

zoegirl:

will jana be at this party?

SnowAngel:

probably. yikes, i didn't think of that.

SnowAngel:

she confronted maddie in the hall today, did you hear? she said, “i know you did it, bitch,” and maddie said, “no, but i wish i did. that's priceless.”

zoegirl:

she quoted jana back to jana? oh great—so now jana's doubly mad. i *told* maddie not to do anything!

SnowAngel:

well she did

SnowAngel:

ok, i'm off. gonna go call ian!

SnowAngel:

oh, ma-a-a-a-die! i is here. where u b?

mad maddie:

den. near tv. come!

SnowAngel:

kk. i haz small pressie for u. well, small-medium. well, medium-medium. medium-large? can I bring?

mad maddie:

if it's a drink, hell yeah!

zoegirl:

angela, i need to talk.

SnowAngel:

*stretches luxuriously and remembers evening of decadence* last nite was a blast, wasn't it? even with jana lurking in the corners and giving us murderous glances. i almost peed my pants when maddie made that comment about her being a witch, cuz it was so true. like she was muttering incantations and putting curses on us with her evil mind.

zoegirl:

can we not talk about jana?

SnowAngel:

apparently she's got some “plan” up her sleeve to get back at maddie. mary kate overheard her talking about it, but she shut up as soon as she realized mk was listening.

zoegirl:

seriously, i don't wanna talk about jana, k?

SnowAngel:

righty-o *f1icks jana into little witchy-poo trash can*

SnowAngel:

omg, i've got “just give me a reason” totally stuck in my head. *sings soulfully with hand to heart: “just give me a reason, just a little bit's enough!”*

zoegirl:

you and andre were so cute dancing together.

SnowAngel:

i LOVE andre. i should kidnap him and make him live in my closet, and just take him out to hold every nite like a teddy bear.

SnowAngel:

he said i could be his fag-hag, did i tell you that?

zoegirl:

yes, about 1,000 times

zoegirl:

what does logan think of that?

SnowAngel:

of what? of ANDRE?

zoegirl:

it kinda seemed like you weren't hanging out with him much. logan, i mean.

SnowAngel:

we hung out plenty—what r you talking about? and if maybe we're still working on things, so? it's like the song says: “we're not broken, just bent.” we'll fig it out.

SnowAngel:

anyway, how would YOU know, miss disappearing act? maddie and i looked all over for you when “thrift shop” came on so we cld belt it out together. you were nowhere to be found!

zoegirl:

well, that's why i wanted to talk. i'm feeling kinda weird about life, but i don't *want* to be.

SnowAngel:

yesssss? tell auntie angela all about it.

zoegirl:

well, doug and i somehow ended up alone in vincent's brother's room. at 1st we were just fooling around, but then things got … pretty involved.

SnowAngel:

“pretty involved”? that's such a zoe-way of putting it.

SnowAngel:

kinda skanky that you used vincent's bro's room, tho.

zoegirl:

i know!

zoegirl:

and then right in the middle, doug stopped and said, “do you want me to put on a condom? i've got one.”

SnowAngel:

*shrieks*

SnowAngel:

little dougie had a condom? he actually went out at some point in time and bought A CONDOM??? zoe, that is SO cute!

zoegirl:

it wasn't *cute*, it was awful! it means that he's been thinking about it 2. you know—about having sex!

SnowAngel:

well DUH

SnowAngel:

what did you say?

zoegirl:

i handled it completely wrong. i said, “now?!” and he said, “why not? it's as good a time as any.”

zoegirl:

after that i pretty much stopped interacting, and eventually he got the point.

SnowAngel:

have you told him about the pill?

zoegirl:

no, i couldn't make the words come

SnowAngel:

zoe …

zoegirl:

why do i act this way?! WHY? i *love* doug. i should be able to talk to him about anything!

zoegirl:

i just didn't wanna have sex with him right that second, in vincent's brother's room, with me afraid the whole time that someone was gonna come in.

SnowAngel:

sweetie. listen. you did the absolute right thing.

SnowAngel:

you and doug will figure it out … and until then, there's plenty of other things you 2 can do to keep yourselves occupied.

zoegirl:

i start tomorrow, btw. the pill.

SnowAngel:

i hope you don't get “spotty dark spots” or whatever.

zoegirl:

gee, thanks

SnowAngel:

just lookin' out for ya

SnowAngel:

so r you good? you feel less weird about things?

zoegirl:

yeah. thanks for listening!

mad maddie:

a word plz, angela

SnowAngel:

*she awakens! she rises! celestial chorus fills the air*

mad maddie:

now that i've had time to sober up, would you mind telling me when you invited ian to vincent's party???

SnowAngel:

omg, that was so fantastic, wasn't it? i was like, “ian, wow! what a kawinkidink!”

mad maddie:

a kawinkidink. uh huh. u told me u had a pressie for me, medium or medium-large, and then u brought IAN to me???

SnowAngel:

now, maddie, no need to get hung up on details. he was there, you were there, you guys had fun …

SnowAngel:

you DID have fun, didn't you?

mad maddie:

it was good to see him, i suppose

SnowAngel:

did you talk about margo?

mad maddie:

no, we didn't talk about margo. why wld we talk about margo?

mad maddie:

mainly we talked about college. he thinks santa cruz sounds cool—i liked the way he looked at me when i told him that's where i want to go. like he thought i was brave for marching off so far.

SnowAngel:

i wish you WEREN'T so brave. i wish you would just go to UGA with me—athens is only an hour away!

mad maddie:

ian's gonna be in athens, you know. he applied to UGA's honors program.

SnowAngel:

i applied to the dumbshit program. i need to leave time for my busy social life.

mad maddie:

i wish we would hear already. i mean, you and ian have nothing to worry about—you'll both get into georgia. but what if i get a really skinny letter from UCSC and it's a rejection?

SnowAngel:

then like i said: just come with me! and ian!!!

mad maddie:

go dawgs! woof woof!

SnowAngel:

u think i'm joking, but i'm not

SnowAngel:

u did apply, didn't u?

mad maddie:

as a back-up, sure. but i'm not going to georgia

SnowAngel:

but why not???? just think how much fun we would have together. and if we could only get zoe to come, things would be absolutely perfect!

mad maddie:

zoe? at georgia? zoe's not going to georgia. zoe didn't even apply to georgia.

SnowAngel:

which is stupid, cuz doesn't her mom know the president of the university? she'd be a shoo-in.

mad maddie:

she'd be a shoo-in anywayz.

mad maddie:

nah, zoe's gonna end up at princeton, cuz that's where her mom went.

SnowAngel:

i thought her top choice was kenyon.

mad maddie:

it is, but she's gonna end up at princeton, that's my prediction. the pressure from her parents will be 2 strong.

SnowAngel:

oh hush. lemme live in my fantasy-land until the very last minute.

SnowAngel:

anyway, how'd we get started on college? i thought we were talking about vincent's party.

mad maddie:

vincent is wacked. last nite he pulled me aside and offered me a vicodin tablet “to smooth things out.” then he changed his mind, saying, “nah, i better not corrupt you.”

SnowAngel:

doesn't he know yr already corrupted?

mad maddie:

not in that way, i'm not

SnowAngel:

where'd he get the vicodin?

mad maddie:

from his bro, who i'm pretty sure does some farming on the side.

SnowAngel:

farming?

mad maddie:

as in pharmaceuticals. and i think you should be proud of me for not being tempted.

SnowAngel:

i AM proud of you. i'm also proud of you for not letting vincent be your fuck-buddy.

SnowAngel:

i wanted to apologize for that, actually. for assuming you were after him.

mad maddie:

i'm NOT after him. i never have been after him. god.

SnowAngel:

well, yeah, i realized that after watching y'all last nite. *gulps and sucks it up* i realized that maybe i wasn't being very fair toward him. or you.

mad maddie:

thank u! i've been wondering what your deal was!

SnowAngel:

he's cool, i admit it! *lashes self with rope of thorns*

SnowAngel:

when he and i were in the kitchen, he was totally cracking me up. AND he had only good things to say about you. he thinks yr a good influence, poor guy.

mad maddie:

a good influence, right. that's why he offered me vicodin.

SnowAngel:

well, we'll just gloss over that bit.

SnowAngel:

you and vincent r pals, just like me and andre.

mad maddie:

amazing, isn't it? turns out i AM capable of being pals with a guy and not jumping his bones …

SnowAngel:

a HOT guy at that, who doesn't happen to be gay.

SnowAngel:

can i ask a question, tho? why is his brother white, when vincent is tan-colored?

mad maddie:

ha! vincent says they get that all the time.

mad maddie:

frank is irish–puerto rican, and vincent is puerto rican–irish

SnowAngel:

???

mad maddie:

their mom is light-skinned, their dad is dark-skinned. i guess each kid came out looking different.

SnowAngel:

oh. ok.

mad maddie:

so did you talk to zoe, find out where she disappeared to?

SnowAngel:

just as we suspected—off with doug.

mad maddie:

doin' da freak between da sheets?

SnowAngel:

omg, where do u come up with these expressions???

SnowAngel:

ALMOST doin' da freak b/w da sheets. doug pulled out a condom, and zoe froze up and put an end to things.

mad maddie:

zoe, zoe, zoe

SnowAngel:

it's only gonna make it harder, you know. once they have sex, it's only gonna make it harder for them to split up in the fall.

mad maddie:

who says they're gonna split up?

SnowAngel:

well PHYSICALLY they will, cuz neither of them applied to the same schools. that's what i mean.

mad maddie:

which in all likelihood means they WILL split up, cuz of the whole long-distance thing. they'll break up … and then they'll get together during christmas break … and then they'll break up again …

SnowAngel:

stop, yr depressing me!

mad maddie:

or who knows? maybe they'll be the couple who proves everyone wrong.

mad maddie:

holy moly, i've gotta piss like a racehorse.

SnowAngel:

oh, now that's lovely

mad maddie:

it's a hangover pee. it was worse this morning, and i sooo didn't wanna crawl out of bed to go to the bathroom.

mad maddie:

i found myself thinking, if only i was wearing a Depends …

SnowAngel:

delete! delete! *erases image of maddie in diaper*

mad maddie:

that would turn ian on, huh?

mad maddie:

peeing now, fyi. la la la.

SnowAngel:

maddie! TMI!

mad maddie:

oh, whatev. everyone pees. i, however, am now pee-free!

mad maddie:

i realized we hadn't discussed the j-word, and i have a new example of her ridiculosity to share.

SnowAngel:

uh oh, did she put into action her EVIL PLAN? *cues special effects guy for thunder and lightning and a shower of hoppy toads*

mad maddie:

i suppose—altho it was so stupid it just made me laugh.

mad maddie:

me, megan, vincent, and vincent's bro were standing around talking, right? and vincent and frank were giving megan hell cuz she kept doing that phlegm-clearing thing cuz of her cold.

SnowAngel:

she was doing that all night! it was driving me crazy!

mad maddie:

frank was like, “i know—yr a hooker. THAT'S why yr sick!”

SnowAngel:

huh?

mad maddie:

it was mildly funny at the time. megan said no, she wasn't a hooker, and frank goes, “ohhhh, then yr a slut!”

SnowAngel:

ok, vincent may be cooler than i thought, but i am SO not impressed with frank. *makes disapproving granny face*

mad maddie:

anywayz, jana had been lurking about during this whole exchange, and when frank said that, she inserted herself into the convo and goes, “WHO'S the slut? WHO'S the slut?”

SnowAngel:

and who WAS the slut?