“What do you mean she didn’t want to quit her band? Why would she have to quit her band? Did you give her some kind of ultimatum?”
“Well, no, it’s nothing like that. I told her that I wanted her to stay with me, and she said that she couldn’t because the band had gigs lined up and studio time scheduled after they were done with my tour. She didn’t think that the guys would wait for her to come home, so she said no.”
“So her only two choices were to stay with you and quit her band or go home and break up?”
“When you put it like that, it sounds pretty stupid. I wasn’t sure what to do, and I obviously didn’t handle things well. It just kind of fell apart.”
“Wow. I’m sorry, bro. What did Mom and Dad say?”
“I haven’t talked to them either. I’m afraid to tell them.”
Luke snorted. “What are you afraid of? That they’ll be mad?”
“Yeah, kind of. I know that they really liked Katie, and I screwed the whole thing up.”
“How did you screw it up? I mean, besides being an inconsiderate idiot who doesn’t call to check on a girl who went home with a brain injury?” Luke teased.
“You know, by letting her go home. She said that she would stay if I made a commitment to her or if I told her that I loved her.”
“And you wouldn’t? Because you don’t love her?”
Blake let out an exasperated sigh. “Dude, I do love her. I was just caught off guard and thought it was too much responsibility and I froze. I didn’t want to be responsible for her missing out on her career if things don’t work out between us, and I guess I just panicked.”
“Wow. Okay, so let me get this straight. A beautiful, talented, charming woman tells you that she will give up her dream job to be with you. All she wants in return is for you to love her, which you do, but for some reason you won’t tell her. So instead of trying to fix things before it’s too late, you let her go home without hearing a word from you? Am I missing anything?”
“No, that’s about right,” Blake mumbled.
“Okay, I just wanted to make sure I’ve got my facts straight before I tell you that you’re the biggest idiot I’ve ever known. Have you considered that you had everything you’ve ever wanted right in front of you and you were too stubborn and selfish to make it work? How many times have you complained that you couldn’t meet a woman who wanted to know the real you? I love you, man, but this is one of the stupidest things you’ve ever done.”
“You’re right. I’ve got to figure out some way to fix this.”
“For your sake, I hope it’s not too late. She really is something special, like once-in-a-lifetime special. If you don’t take her, I will.” Luke teased.
“Not a chance. All right. I’ve got some thinking to do. Don’t tell Mom and Dad about this. I’ll never hear the end of it.”
Luke laughed. “I know that’s right, they love Katie. I’m pretty sure Mom’s already looking for a mother of the groom outfit for your wedding. I’ll keep my mouth shut for you and save it for when I need to get you in trouble. Good luck, bro.”
“Thanks. I’ll have those tickets waiting for your friend. Talk with you soon.”
Blake ended the call and put his head back against the seat. He looked out the bus window at the scenery flying by and silently berated himself for letting Katie get away without a fight. She was right about him, and she was right to leave. He knew how hard it had been for her to find a man who valued her career and didn’t try to take her time away from it. He knew it and had the nerve to act like he was any different than the rest of the guys who weren’t good enough for her. If she never forgave him, he would deserve it. He had to find a way to make it right.
• • •
Katie had been home over two weeks before she realized that nobody from Sterling had called her. She hadn’t heard from Blake, either, but that was no surprise. She had pushed him away in the hospital and things had been so broken when he left that she’d be surprised if she ever heard from him again.
Not hearing from her band in all this time was a surprise, though. They should have returned from the tour over a week ago. She thought that they might feel distant from her since she had spent so much of the tour with Blake, but she still wanted to find out how everything had gone for the last couple of shows. Before the summer tour, she and the guys had practically been family, and surely that wasn’t beyond repair. Ties like theirs weren’t so easily broken. Why hadn’t they checked in on her? They knew that she had been discharged from the hospital within twenty-four hours, but nobody even called to see if she was all right? Did they assume that since she went home everything was fine? What was going on?
She had been a good little patient since going home to her parents’ house. She had gotten plenty of rest, she had visited her regular physician, and she had carefully watched for signs of trouble. There had been no new symptoms, her bruises had faded, and she was ready to get back to work. Everything was fine and she was getting restless. It was past time to return to her apartment, get back in the studio, put the mess with Blake Jackson behind her, and get on with her life. If the band didn’t get back on stage soon she was going to have to find a job or beg her father for work at his office. Katie had bills to pay, and she was on her own again.
A few years ago, Katie might have quietly waited for them to call her, but this time she needed answers. She picked up her phone and called Charles. She thought it was going to go to his voicemail when he finally answered.
“Hey, Katie,” said Charles.
“Hey stranger! You don’t sound happy to hear from me.” She tried to sound light and breezy, but she was afraid that her bitterness was showing.
“I’m sorry. Of course I’m happy to hear from you. How have you been?” Charles sounded contrite.
“I’m totally fine. I was released from the hospital, and I came home with my parents to recover. I’ve been resting and I haven’t had any of the symptoms that the doctors told me to look out for. Now I’m feeling great and I’m ready to get back to work. How were the Georgia shows? Blake told me that Chet Wilson was going to fill in for me. How’d that work out?”
“They went really well, kiddo. We missed you, though.”
“That’s great. I missed y’all too. It was really disappointing to leave the tour with my parents instead of on the bus. So what’s the plan? I haven’t seen a current schedule or anything. I was going to wait for one of y’all to call me but I’m getting antsy.”
Charles was quiet for so long that Katie thought the call might have been disconnected. “About that, ah, we have been trying to, ah, come up with the best way to tell you this, but, ah,” he trailed off.
“What is it?” Katie asked. “Just say it, Charles.” She wasn’t sure that she wanted to hear what he had to say.
“We’ve run the numbers a dozen different ways, but it looks like we just barely broke even on the tour. Our expenses were much higher than we thought and it looks like it’s going to be a while before we can afford to get back into the studio.”
She let out the breath she had been holding. “Is that all? Oh my gosh, I thought something terrible had happened! You scared me!” She giggled.
“This is serious. We are way behind where we should be at this point. It’s going to be a while before we can record any new material unless we come up with something soon.”
“So what’s the problem, exactly? Why can’t we just juggle our schedule, play some gigs, and save some money before heading back into the studio? Not having tons of money isn’t exactly new for us.”
“Darlin’, that’s true, and chances are good that things will work out just fine. Jeff’s having a real tough time with it though. He’s real down about it, and I guess everyone is just disappointed. We all put so much into the tour and thought that it would make more of a difference. Now that we’re home, it kinda feels like nothing has changed.”
“I’m surprised to hear this. Y’all are usually much more optimistic.”
Charles let out a big breath. “I know. We’ve just been at this for so long, and the tour was supposed to be the big reward for all our hard work. I’m sure things will start looking up once we get back at it. Maybe we’re just tired.”
“I’m sure that’s a big part of it. I feel like all I’ve done since I got home is sleep. Let’s get together soon and get back on track. Feeling sorry for ourselves won’t solve anything.”
“You’re right, darlin’. I’ll be in touch. See you soon.”
They ended the call, and Katie sat back on the couch. She needed Sterling to succeed more than ever before. The guys in the band had no idea how much she had given up to stay with them, and she couldn’t tolerate them moping around, whining about money and how much they didn’t make on the tour. Her bills hadn’t stopped coming just because she was out on a big summer tour, though, and she needed income.
Now what? Katie sat in her parents’ cozy living room, surrounded by dated knick-knacks, familiar furniture and family photos, and wondered what she was going to do with herself. No gigs meant no money. No money meant that Katie had to figure something out quick.
Her father was always willing to hire her to help out at his office, so she could do that until things turned around for Sterling. Katie usually enjoyed working in his office, where she could help with the appointments, clean the sample eyeglasses, do a little filing. It wasn’t enough of a plan for the future, though. She wasn’t an optometrist’s assistant, she was a fiddler. If Sterling didn’t get enough work soon, she would have to get out and find bands looking for fiddlers to fill in, maybe get some studio work.
She tried not to dwell on the disappointment of coming home no better off than when they had left. When they found out they were joining Blake Jackson’s summer tour, dollar signs and dreams of success had danced in her head. Now all she was left with were the memories. It was impossible to forget how Blake’s arms felt around her, how his lips felt pressed against hers, how gorgeous he looked in the soft morning light.
Katie couldn’t help but think about what she had given up to stay with Sterling. A couple of weeks ago, she had thought that her future in music was tied to these men. Now it looked like her future with Sterling was no different than her past with Sterling. With any luck, they had picked up some new fans, and maybe it would be easier to book more shows, better shows. Things probably weren’t as bleak as Charles made them sound.
Chapter Thirteen
Blake had to figure out how to get Katie back. If his conversation with Luke didn’t convince him, the excruciating emptiness in his heart did. The sickening weight of his loss stayed with him. It had landed in his stomach when he left her hospital room and it hadn’t gone away. If anything it had grown worse. Every day that he spent away from Katie brought fresh pain, new reminders of what he was missing. He thought time would heal him, that having her out of sight would make losing her easier. He had to get her back, had to make it work somehow; if it didn’t go well, he might be out of chances. He had to get it right the first time.
Chet Wilson’s mother was critically ill, and Blake knew that Chet wanted to go to her but leaving the tour early would likely jeopardize his contract. Before Katie came into his life, Blake would have worked with Chet to find a temporary replacement while he tended to family matters. Chet would be allowed to return, confident that his job would be there waiting for him when his family situation was resolved. Blake was sorely tempted to let Chet go home and replace him with Katie. It could blow back on him though, perhaps in the press, almost definitely within the band. Everyone who played for him was hired for the job; they weren’t a band in the traditional sense, but there was a family atmosphere that would certainly be disrupted if Blake let one of them go.
Blake had built a reputation in the music industry of treating the musicians who worked for him fairly, for creating an atmosphere of equality, of togetherness. So far nobody had challenged that or taken advantage of his inclusive nature. Replacing a long-time employee to suit his romantic desires could damage his reputation, but wasn’t it his right? Hadn’t he spent his entire career working to get to the place where he could pick and choose who played with him? Critical decisions require expert consultation. He picked up his phone and called Caroline.
“Hey, Caro, can you meet me in my dressing room?”
“Of course. I’m on my way. Give me two minutes.”
Blake paced the length of his dressing room and ran his fingers through his hair. He gave himself a long, hard look in the mirror and pointed a finger at his reflection. “Don’t mess this up,” he said out loud to himself. He heard the clacking of Caroline’s footsteps grow louder as she approached his room. She gave a perfunctory knock and poked her head inside the doorway.
“I’m here,” she announced.
“Come on in and have a seat.” He grabbed a couple bottles of water and joined Caroline at his table.
Caroline took off her blazer and draped it over the back of her chair before sitting down and opening the bottled water Blake offered her. She gave Blake an appraising look and he was sure that she was taking in the dark circles under his eyes and his newly gaunt appearance.
“Are you feeling all right?” she asked.
“I’m fine. I’m just tired. Have you heard about Chet Wilson’s mother?” Blake asked.
“Yes, I believe he is interested in leaving the tour temporarily if you will give him leniency with his contract. Her condition appears to be worsening, and chances are pretty good that if you don’t let him go, he’ll leave anyway.” She took a sip of her water and looked at Blake over the tops of her glasses. “I don’t think you called me to discuss whether or not you should let him go though, am I right?”
Blake laughed. “Am I that transparent?”
“I just know you too well. I think I know where this is going,” said Caroline. She gave him a sympathetic smile and put her BlackBerry on silent mode.
“So I guess I just need a voice of reason, I need you to talk this out with me. I will let Chet go, no problem. He can go tomorrow if he needs it. I can find someone to fill in, and as important as this tour is I still wouldn’t keep a man from going to be with his dying mother. I want to let him go and replace him permanently, though, and I want a second opinion.”