Huh. I guess I never thought of it that way. But the fact is I learned it all from watching my parents, from watching them fail at the whole idea of love and family.
“
I actually could say the same to you,
”
I reply.
It
’
s true. Within these couple of hours I
’
ve spent with him today, he doesn
’
t feel like the twenty-four-year-old kid that I saw before. He
’
s different. Most thirty-year-old men aren
’
t as put together as him.
“
My parents divorced when I was a teenager. I
’
ve learned some through watching them. I don
’
t have very many good memories, but I do like to take the positive out of it. I know what I don
’
t want in a relationship, and I know who I don
’
t want to end up like. I
’
ve made a conscious effort to
not
be anything like them.
”
“
I
’
m sorry for that. That must have been hard for you, but look at you now
—
look at all you have overcome. I admire your strength in not playing the victim.
”
I blush. I
’
m not too sure why the praise feels so good coming from him, but it does. Cody praised me a lot, but it just didn
’
t feel the same as how I feel now. How is that possible? I loved Cody. I really did, but years in our relationship together doesn
’
t even compare to five minutes with Kyle.
“
Thank you, really.
”
We both clean up the mess. I wash the dishes and he dries. We naturally become comfortable as we sync into a rhythmic flow. He splashes me with water, and I splash him back. He has bubbles hanging off his chin, and I can
’
t stop laughing. My stomach hurts. I feel as though I
’
ve just done a thousand sit-ups. I haven
’
t laughed this hard in such a long time.
It
’
s now quarter past eight. Our laughter settles into a calm silence. I walk around the couch as he stands on the other side. We stare at each other for a moment, a buzz of energy ignites, but I am the first to look away.
It
’
s taking everything in me not to walk straight over to him, slide my fingers through the back of his hair, pull him to me, and kiss him. Every button in me is being pushed, every limit I have made for myself is being tested, and yet I somehow am able to find the control to stop. Just barely.
I don
’
t know what I
’
m so afraid of. Maybe what his brother said is sinking in. Or maybe it
’
s because I have just ran from one relationship, and I know I shouldn
’
t even consider jumping into another.
Or
maybe it
’
s because I know the moment he touches me, all hope of keeping control will be lost, and I will come completely undone at the seams.
I walk over to my wrapped artwork to get some distance. I bend down and take a peek inside. It doesn
’
t matter how much of a distance I put in between us, I can still feel him as though he is directly behind me. My stomach flutters and the hairs on my arms stand straight up. My body feels euphoric as though it
’
s not even mine.
I stand and quickly turn to say something, but I run straight into him. My hands are now on his chest. I can feel the beat of his heart thoroughly pounding through his shirt. Heat now rushes to every inch of my body and in between my thighs is now pulsing. Everything inside of me is screaming for more. I look up at him, and he gazes into my eyes, scalding me with an intense desire. I almost stop breathing. I almost follow my feelings and give in to my need. But I don
’
t. I just can
’
t.
I back away from him, removing my hands to disconnect from him completely.
“
I think it
’
s getting late.
”
He clears his throat, obviously out of sorts.
“
Okay.
”
He claps his hands together, grabs my coat, and holds it open for me. I hesitate for a moment and then realize how stupid I am being. I push my hands through my sleeves, and he turns to slide his on.
“
Button up. It
’
s gonna be cold out.
”
“
This is going to be one tough thing to get used to. Rochester
’
s weather definitely keeps you on your toes,
”
I tell him.
“
You ain
’
t lying. This place can get downright depressing. The winters are way too long, and the summers are barely existent.
”
He holds the car door open for me.
“
And here you are, possibly moving here,
”
he teases.
I snicker. He walks around and jumps in the driver
’
s seat.
“
I can definitely understand why you might want to move somewhere warm,
”
I say,
“
but
if
I do decide to move here, maybe we can do this more often. It sure does pass the time.
”
He grins ear to ear. He is unbelievably adorable. I reach for his face. I can
’
t seem to stop myself this time. I slowly caress my fingers down his cheek to his jawline. His eyes don
’
t leave mine. The stubble from his five o
’
clock shadow tickles in a hot, rough sort of way.
“
Thanks for today. I really had a good time,
”
I admit.
His voice is scratchy.
“
You
’
re welcome.
”
I remove my fingers from his skin. The rest of the ride back to the hotel is quiet and full of sexual tension. I
’
ve never felt anything of this magnitude before. It
’
s the ultimate foreplay without the play.
Kyle pulls up to the front of the hotel and parks.
“
Thank you for allowing me to be the one to show you around a little. I know we didn
’
t go too far, but I
’
d like to take you out on the town again sometime. Maybe next weekend if you
’
re up for it?
”
he asks.
I thought he would never ask.
“
I would love that.
”
I open the car door and step out halfway.
“
I
’
ll see you Monday.
”
I shut the door and watch him pull off.
Today was an exhilarating day filled with surprises. In the last couple of hours, I have experienced a multitude of emotions I never knew were in me. I
’
ve also realized that while my self-control can be my downfall, it was my savior tonight for stopping me from doing something that I could possibly regret in the long run.
I change into my night clothes and check my phone to remove it off of vibrate. I have missed six calls and have four unopened text messages, all from Cody. The last one fills me with guilt.
“
Why did you leave me?
”
CHAPTER THIRTEEN
Kyle
I lay in bed for hours last night, just thinking about Max. I couldn
’
t get her out of my head: her smile, gorgeous blue eyes, the way she smelled, the sound of her laugh, but most importantly
—
she made me feel alive. Not the kind of feeling a guy gets when he scores. She made me for once consider my future, wanting something more than just a career and the bachelor life. And to be honest, this scares the shit out of me.
I never wanted to be the guy that gets swooped up in a fairy tale. It just isn
’
t me. And for a while, I just thought it wasn
’
t in my DNA. Some people are just wired differently; I thought I was one of them, and I was okay with that. But something has changed. The earth has shifted somehow, and it is Max that has bumped it off track. Now I just need to figure out how to get it back into alignment.
“
What
’
s up, bro? You look like you just got ran over by a Mack truck,
”
Jeff says.
I feel like it too.
“
Thanks, man. Nice to see you too.
”
Every Sunday, Jeff and I meet at the gym for an early morning workout. We work all the demons out from the weekend so we can start fresh on Monday mornings. It
’
s a regiment we
’
ve had since we were teenagers.
We stretch and then start out with cardio to get our juices pumping.
“
I didn
’
t sleep much last night.
”
Jeff smiles proudly.
“
Nice! Who
’
d you hook up with? Tell me it isn
’
t that girl Trish from accounting
—
I see the way she looks at you. You
’
re like a God to her,
”
he says, rolling his eyes.
Man, is he freaking serious right now? He thinks I
’
m going to hook up with one of Beth
’
s friends?
“
Dude!
She
’
s Beth
’
s friend. Come on; I
’
m not that desperate. I
’
m trying to get Beth out of my life, and that sure wouldn
’
t help,
”
I argue, half out of breath.
“
Yeah, but she
’
s hot!
”
“
Then
you
do her. The last thing I need is any more drama at work. My mom would kill me,
”
I tell him, out of breath.
“
Yeah, the whole office was talking about what happened in Junior
’
s office. They said you two were going at it. What was that all about?
”
he asks.
Damn, I knew everyone would be gossiping about it, but I was being optimistic and hoping they would forget. With my luck, they
’
ll probably still be talking about it on Monday. If it was anyone else in the company, the buzz would have dwindled down, but since it
’
s me, the boss
’
s son, it
’
s big news. That shit drives me nuts.
I shake my head. We move on to the weights.
“
He
’
s up to his old shit again. I don
’
t know what his problem is. He told Max about my past. I wanted to kill him!
”
I growl. I pick up the fifty pounders and start taking it out on my triceps.
“
I just don
’
t understand why he does that,
”
Jeff says.
“
He
’
s such a dick! He
’
s supposed to have your back.
”
“
Yeah. I know, man.
”
I see Julian walking toward us.
“
Hey! Whaddup, Kyle?
”
he says, slapping me up.
Julian is Jeff
’
s younger brother. He just turned twenty-one a couple of months ago. He could almost pass as Jeff
’
s twin except for the fact that he
’
s on the scrawny side. Jeff
’
s swollen with muscle. No steroids, just pure hard work. He looks like a juicehead that should have grown up in New Jersey. They both have dark chocolate brown eyes and wear their hair short but long enough to slick back with some gel.
Julian looks up to Jeff
—
has ever since we were younger. When we took him out on his twenty-first birthday, he was ecstatic to finally be able to hang with us. He
’
s now on the same playing field. Once you can legally drink and go anywhere you please, life levels out
—
age no longer matters. At least that
’
s how I see it.