“You don’t have a pit bull,” I said.
“And you ain’t got no sense of humor, ’eah?” she said. “You want a glass of tea?”
“No, thanks, I gotta hustle my buns to Mount Pleasant to grocery shop. We have about seventy-five people coming tomorrow.”
“You want me to keep Mavis at home?”
“Heavens! No!”
“All right then. I’ll bring two pound cakes. I had a dream you were going to a funeral.”
“No!”
“What’s the matter with you? Girl? Don’t you know that means out with the old and in with the new? Shuh! How long you been living ’round ’eah?”
“All my life!” I threw my arms around her and hugged her tight. “You’re wonderful! Thanks, Miss Angel! Everybody will faint when they taste your cake!”
“You’re right,” she said, “I expect they will do that. Better invite a doctor, ’eah?”
“We did. Three in fact. That I know of anyway. I’ll see you later.”
Two hours later Lucy and I had barbecue, baked beans, coleslaw, and biscuits ordered to be delivered in serving containers with warming candles from Mr. B’s, the best barbecue place on this earth. Our trunk was filled with paper plates and napkins, plastic cups and flatware, cases of soda, beer, and wine, and enough bug spray to wipe out every bug in the Amazon. I was getting excited. It dawned on me that besides Jim’s, I hadn’t been to or given a full-scale party in years. I couldn’t wait.
By one the next afternoon, my backyard was in celebration mode. Daddy was outside hanging the twenty-five strings of lights Jim had bought at Pottery Barn. There were ten lights to a string and each one was covered in a miniature Japanese paper lantern.
“You need a deck,” Daddy said. “A deck would be perfect out here because the ground is so uneven. If you’re gonna have these cookouts all the time, you need a deck. We could build in the grill with a little refrigerator and sink. You could have nice counters and outdoor storage. Then you could put benches and planters along the other sides and people would have a place to sit.”
“You’re right,” I said and gave him a kiss on the cheek, thinking there was a deck in my future. “If you want to build me a deck for my thirtieth birthday, I wouldn’t object.”
“You were thirty a long time ago.”
“And, what did you give me?”
“I don’t remember.”
“That’s the point.” I giggled and he laughed with me.
“You’ve got the devil in you, Anna. Maybe we’ll go to Home Depot or Lowe’s next week and have a look around.”
“I’d love that, Daddy, I really would.”
“You could have a hot tub too, you know.”
“Get Lucy a hot tub. What would I do with it? Sit in there by myself and read
Salon
magazine?”
“Lucy? Actually, that’s not a bad idea!”
I groaned at the thought of Daddy and Lucy in a hot tub together and then thought, well, why the heck shouldn’t they do whatever they want?
But at that moment, there was no hot tub and no deck. Jim and Frannie were arranging the tables. David was bringing heavy clay pots of flowers from all around our house and Lucy’s to help decorate the back stoop and the tables. That kid was a doll, always pitching in. Emily was spraying the bushes with bug killer to hold the mosquitoes and no-see-ums at bay.
“I’m getting eaten alive!” she complained.
“Keep spraying!” I said.
I heard a truck out front and went to see who it was.
It wasn’t the delivery van from Mister B’s Barbecue. It was another van. On the side it read TAYLOR SLACK’S BEACH MUSIC UNLIMITED. A good-looking young man got out to greet me.
“Are you Mrs. Abbot?”
“Is my husband responsible for this?” I couldn’t stop shaking my head.
“I believe so, ma’am. Is he here?”
“Come on around to the backyard, Taylor,” Jim said and looked at me with his best bad-boy face. “Well? Are we having a party or aren’t we?”
“You’re incredible,” I said.
“I came early to put down the dance floor, sir. Is there someone who could give me a hand with the risers?”
“No problem, son, just come with me.”
Dance floor?
The next truck to arrive was from Margaret Egan’s Nursery. I went outside with Jim on my heels.
“I’ve got forty red and yellow hibiscus bushes and twenty palms. Where do you want them?”
“What?” I was shocked.
“Don’t worry,” Jim said, “they’re rented. Where are your Christmas lights?”
“I don’t have any,” I said. “But Lucy might.”
By five o’clock, I had showered and changed into the lethal dress I wore the night Arthur and I sailed the River of Sin.
“Damn, sister, you look fierce!” Jim said.
“Thank you!” I said and did a little spin. “Don’t you want to feel the goods, big boy?”
“At moments like this? Yeah.”
“Come on!”
“Ahem!” Jim said, clearing his throat, “but rather than mangle a perfectly good platonic relationship, whadaya say we check out the party scene?”
“Right!” I said and gave him a
Charlie’s Angels
handgun shot, blowing off the tip of my smoking finger. “Let’s go!”
As always, Jim had worked his magic. My yard looked so amazing with all the twinkling hibiscus bushes and palms I thought we were ready for a wedding. The dance floor was only twelve inches off the ground, but the risers were adjustable, so even though my yard was uneven, the dance floor was level. And, it had steps to get to it so people didn’t kill themselves getting on it. Young precious Taylor, who Emily had half an eye on, put skirting around the sides with a staple gun and Jim placed the lit plants along the sides, creating walls. Citronella tiki torches were everywhere, lit and doing their job.
“Doesn’t it look incredible?” Lucy said. “I gotta go change in a minute, but what do you think?”
“Jaysus! She’s been bossing me around like Sister Torture teaching me times tables!” Frannie said, on her way to the house. “I’m needing a shower!”
“I thought she was Greek,” Lucy said.
“Her mother was Irish,” Jim said.
“Ah,” Lucy said. “Come on and let’s check this all out, then I gotta go do my face and all.”
The deejay had his own generator, which was a good thing. I had visions of losing power and all these people bumping into each other in the dark, getting black eyes and going to the emergency room. But this guy was prepared for everything. He had boxes of maracas, leis, straw hats, crazy sunglasses, and glow-in-the-dark necklaces. Jim was so crazy and fun—he’d probably start a limbo contest. I would not encourage them.
Mr. B’s had delivered and the food was all in place. The beer was iced down in a giant garbage can and the soft drinks were in another. Everything was ready.
Just then, Brigitte appeared with a carved watermelon basket in her arms.
“It’s déjà vu all over again,” she said to Lucy and me.
“I’ve got six men coming to meet you,” Lucy said.
“Well, that’s a start,” Brigitte said, completely deadpan. “Here, take this. I’ve got two more of these babies in the car.”
Bettina was pulling up with Bobby when we got back to Brigitte’s car.
“I’m so excited!” Bettina said, slamming the door of the Yacht as Bobby winced. She had on white capris with a pale blue chambray shirt over a white halter and she looked radiant. That girl was as cute as a bug. “I got a bucket of salsa! Only five ninety-nine! Such a deal! And I got six bags of Doritos, ten dozen brownies, and a sheet cake with an American flag on it—think that’s enough? Wait till you see the cake! It’s gorgeous!”
“This party is all she’s talked about all week,” Bobby said. He gave me a kiss on the cheek. “Same drill? Food out back?”
“Yeah,” I said, “thanks.”
People arrived, the music started, and our guests wandered back and forth from Lucy’s widow’s walk as the sun went down. Our party took on a life of its own. Lucy’s blenders whirred while she stood back and shimmied. Yes, Lucy was wearing one of her fringed “outfits.” Daddy watched her in fixated fascination.
Miss Angel and Miss Mavis slipped through the oleanders with platters of sliced pound cake. I went to greet them.
“Oh! Miss Angel! This looks so delicious! Thank you so much! And Miss Mavis! You look so pretty!”
“Hush, girl, take this platter and find me a place to sit. At my age I could drop dead any minute.”
“She hasn’t been to a party in years,” Miss Angel said.
“What did she say?” Miss Mavis said.
“I said that the dress you’re wearing is my favorite too!”
Miss Angel said.
“Oh! Well, thank you, Angel.”
I took the platters from them, Emily took them from me, and I sat the two women at the table with the umbrella.
“Can I get y’all something to eat or drink?”
“Don’t fuss over us, Anna, go be with your young friends. We’ll be fine and
I’ll
take care of Mavis,” Miss Angel said. “Hey! I like this music!”
“Under the Boardwalk” was playing.
“What’s that?” Miss Mavis screamed.
Miss Angel shot me a look of loving exasperation and turned back to Miss Mavis.
“I said, This music makes me feel like dancing!”
“Well, you go on and dance then. I can’t! Can’t afford to break a hip, you know.”
I left them to their squabbling and looked around. The yard was filling with people I hadn’t seen in ages and people I hadn’t ever seen. Probably Lucy’s friends, I thought. Everyone seemed to be having a wonderful time and I was thrilled.
I spotted Carla Egbert, the receptionist from Harriet’s House of Horrors, and worked my way over to talk to her.
“Carla!”
“Hey! God! What a night for a party! Anna! I love your house! Thanks so much for inviting me!”
“I’m so glad to see you!” I was. “So, how’s it going? Old Harriet still mad at me?”
“Anna, I caaan’t staand her another minute! Gimme a job!”
The very words I had waited to hear.
“When can you start?”
“Are you serious?”
“You bet! Wanna run the place?”
“I’ll do
anything!”
“That’s the whole point, Carla, you
can
do anything! Tell Harriet to kiss my big fat pink fluffy behind and come in tomorrow!”
“You mean it?”
Was she kidding?
“Uh, yes. I mean it. I open at nine.”
“Deal!”
We hugged and I thought, Okay, this is going to be a truly wonderful night.
Everyone was dancing and the blistering heat of the day became one of those famous Lowcountry balmy nights. You could smell salt and even over the music—which was pretty loud—you could hear the ocean’s roar. True to his word, Jim was teaching Bettina to shag and Frannie was teaching Bobby. They were all wearing sombreros and laughing, having fun.
David was running around with Lucy’s digital camera, with Emily by his side. I have to say this again. This David was an excellent influence. His plan was to fill the memory stick, download it, erase it, and continue taking pictures. All the prints would be in the salon next week for everyone to claim. What a great idea! I looked up a few minutes later and saw Daddy doing a slow fox-trot with Miss Mavis. Miss Mavis was in heaven.
“Get a picture of
them!”
I said to David and he went off and snapped a dozen, knowing it was important to document it.
Trixie had arrived, wearing a pale yellow linen sleeveless dress. She worked her way around the crowd, arriving at where I was standing after some time.
“Hello, Anna,” she said, offering me her cheek.
I gave the old goat a little peck and said, “Oh, Trixie, I’m so glad you could come.”
“Ah understand my son had a little setback,” she said as though Jim had clipped a bothersome hangnail.
I could smell gin. I wasn’t serving gin. And, I wasn’t sure if she meant Gary’s death or not. “Do you mean Gary?”
“Of course Ah mean
Gary,”
she said with noticeable discomfort.
She was snockered. “Well, yes. Gary was a great friend to Jim for many years. I’m just glad Jim was with Gary and his family at the end. I think it made it easier for all of them.”
Trixie looked at me like she had no earthly idea what I was talking about and I worried for a moment that I had given her some information that Jim didn’t want her to have.
“Ah see,” she said, “Ah’m sure it did. My son is a very compassionate man.”
“Your son hung the moon, Trixie, and he’s spent the better part of his years teaching our daughter and me how to arrange the stars.”
“
Our
daughter? Come now, Anna. When are you going to let go of that little fantasy?”
I stared at her. “Give me your car keys.”
She opened her purse and handed them to me. “Why? Am Ah blocking somebody?”
“Yeah, the rescue team from Betty Ford. Don’t even think about driving, okay?”
“How dare you! Why! Of all the
crust!”
“Emily is our daughter and you don’t know shit, Trixie. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.”
I walked away before I hit her. She wasn’t going to ruin this fabulous night. She could take her anger to a counseling center and stew in it for all I cared. I managed to get about ten feet away from her when I bumped right into Jack Taylor.
“Well, hi!” he said, “this is some great party!”
“Hi!” I said, trying to recover my good humor. “Hey, I never got a chance to thank you for the plant, but it was awfully nice of you. Not necessary, but very nice. Where’s Caroline?”
“She’s around. You want to dance?”
“Why not?” I said. I tossed the car keys to Jim and said, “Hang on to these!”
The deejay was playing “Carolina Girls” but we’d danced for about two seconds when he switched to the Righteous Brothers’ “You’ve Lost That Loving Feeling” and the next thing I knew, Jack Taylor had his arm all the way around my waist and I could smell his aftershave. I liked it and I liked the way he held me too.
Oh-oh. No, no, Anna. Don’t go there!
I straightened up a little and he looked at me.