Authors: Unknown
“I know nothing of sin?” Stephen asked curiously.
“Have you ever fucked a man?” Jonathan responded snidely. “Or fucked anyone for that matter?”
“No to the first, yes to the second,” Stephen replied blithely. “Do I pass the test? Do I get to join some club?”
“So the man of God isn’t so godly?” Jonathan could hear the bitter anger in his voice, but he couldn’t control it.
“You said it yourself, man first.But yes, still godly, as much as I’m able.”
“Have you ever killed a man?” Jonathan’s voice was a mere whisper.
Stephen stood and walked over to him. “Yes.” His simple answer shocked Jonathan.
“I was there with you, Jonathan. It was war.” Stephen wrapped his arm around Jonathan and steered him back to his chair.
“But as a vicar, you stayed behind the lines.” Jonathan looked at him and suddenly knew him differently.
“I could have. But how could I help you and all the others if I didn’t know what you were going through? Did I intend to kill someone? No, but it happened. Do I pray for their souls every day? Yes.”
He sat down and pulled his chair close to Jonathan’s, leaning forward companionably. “And I still believe God loves me, Jonathan. He was with me on that battlefield and did not forsake me.Just as he was with you in the woods. Have you thought that perhaps he sent Phillip and Maggie to you to help heal those
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wounds?”
Jonathan shook his head adamantly. “No, what I did was not an act of war, Stephen, it was murder. I murdered an innocent boy.”
“In a time of war, a time of confusion, and fear, and panic.”Stephen took Jonathan’s shoulders in his hands and gave him a gentle shake. “It’s not God who won’t forgive you, Jonathan, it’s you who cannot forgive yourself.”
* * * * *
Freddy left in an unmitigated flurry. “You have kept me from Brett for nearly two weeks, Jonathan. I may never forgive you. Do not expect to see me for at least a year.” Jonathan merely snorted skeptically.
He knew it had only been eight days. And it was well known that Brett and Freddy couldn’t keep their noses out of other people’s business. They seemed to do nothing but make the rounds of all their friends’
houses, prying into their affairs and trying to fix the unfixable. And usually succeeding, Jonathan had to admit wryly, but not this time.Freddy had one more thing to say before he left. He gazed sternly down at Jonathan from his magnificent mount—dukes seemed to have the best horseflesh, Jonathan thought irreverently. “Do not slit your throat or drink yourself to death after I leave. Brett would be quite put out.”
With that he swung his horse around and raced off.
Ian and Derek were waiting to take their leave as well and heard Freddy’s last remark. Ian laughed, but Derek just scowled. Inwardly Jonathan sighed again. Freddy had been right, Ian’s marriage was weighing heavily on Derek. He would place a wager that he knew where Brett and Freddy were headed next.
“Go ahead and kill yourself,” Derek said contemptuously. “I shall come back and beat your corpse to a bloody pulp.”
Jonathan couldn’t contain his bark of laughter. “Yes, but I’ll be dead, so it won’t matter.”
Derek barely cracked a smile. “I shall beat it so hard you’ll feel it in hell,” he growled, lightly stepping down the stairs. Derek was a tall, heavily muscled man, but he was grace itself when he moved. It was disconcerting, since he was also a ruffian and a bully. He looked as if he should be floating above the ground when he walked. Derek nearly went out of his way to alienate people, but there was something so vulnerable about him, you wanted to clasp him to your breast and protect him. Then he punched you in the jaw, and you saw what folly that was.
Jonathan’s musings were interrupted by Ian who pulled him into an embrace. Jonathan appreciated Ian’s gesture. He didn’t want to admit how good it felt, the physical comfort of a simple hug.
“Well, I too have been kept too long from London,” Ian said jovially. “I have yet to see my betrothed. I wrote and requested that she be there last week. This shall be a true test of her character. Will she react as a shrew or a martyr, hmm?”
“What?” Jonathan asked, shocked. “How could you keep her waiting, Ian? You knew I would be fine.”
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Ian looked at him seriously, something Ian usually avoided. “You are far more important to me than some vaguely remembered chit, Jonathan. She’ll recover as she awaits me in my palatial London townhouse and contemplates how much this will cost me.”
“She sounds lovely, Ian,” Derek commented snidely. “How delightful your married life should be. I can see why you’re in such a rush to get to the altar.”
Ian ignored him. “And I’m still not sure you are fine, Jonathan,” he continued. “We are all deserting you en masse. Perhaps Derek and I should stay for a while longer?”
“Oh so I’m still included in your life then?” Derek said coldly. “Please feel free to arrange my schedule as you see fit.”
Ian sighed. “Derek, can we please focus on Jonathan for a few more minutes? Then you can harass me all the way to London.”
This time Derek ignored Ian. “Goodbye, Jonathan,” Derek said, mounting his horse. “Stop punishing yourself. You’re being an idiot.”
“I can always count on you to speak your mind, Derek,” Jonathan said dryly.
Derek looked taken aback. “Andwhose else would I speak?” he asked.
Ian walked over and slowly mounted his horse. “If you need anything, just send word. My new bride, I’m sure, would appreciate our absence.” The last was said with an amused grin. Then he turned his horse and rode off, Derek following in his wake.
Maggie rolled over and saw that Phillip was awake as well. He wasn’t touching her, hadn’t tried since the attack nearly three weeks ago. He was being characteristically considerate, she knew. She actually had been afraid he would try to make love to her at first and she hadn’t been ready. Her head knew it was Phillip but she’d still panicked at the thought. She truly thought she was past that now, however.
He’d also been very careful about what he told her—about the search for Robertson but especially about Jonathan.
It was time. She needed to know where Jonathan was, not just that he was all right. And she wanted Phillip. She wanted him to make love to her, to hold her. She needed it. She rolled the rest of the way over so that she was on her side facing him. He turned his head to look at her.
“I want you,” Maggie whispered.
Phillip closed his eyes as if in pain. “Are you sure?” he whispered back. The whispers created an intensely intimate atmosphere.
Maggie couldn’t stop her smile. She felt like a child exchanging secrets in the dark. Only the secrets she wanted to share were anything but childlike. “Yes, I’m sure. I want you inside me now, soon. Please.”
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Phillip immediately rolled over, pushing her down on her back under him. Maggie could feel the tension inhim, she could tell he was holding himself rigidly in control. She waited for the panic tocome, only it never did. She hadn’t realized how worried she was about the fear coming back until itdidn’t , and she felt crashing waves of relief. Her arms went around Phillip and she hugged him close.
“Maggie,” Phillip’s voice was ragged, “I need you so much. I hurt, Maggie, I hurt.”
Maggie ran her arms up until she could place her hands on Phillip’s face. “Let me make it better, Phillip, let me,” she whispered as she spread her legs wide, wrapping them around him in a true lover’s embrace.
She pulled his mouth to hers and kissed him, the kissmore tender than passionate, more healing than arousing. Still the taste and texture of him, the responsive heat of his mouth had Maggie wet and aching in a matter of moments.
As if reading her mind, Phillip adjusted his hips and his cock found her throbbing entrance. He didn’t push into her immediately however. He pulled his mouth away and rested his forehead against hers. “I don’t want to hurt you.” The difficulty of restraining himself was revealed by the fine trembling Maggie could feel throughout his body held so intimately against hers.
Maggie pulled his head down again and set her lips against his ear. She flicked his earlobe with her tongue then ran it along the outer rim.Phillip groaned, his breath ragged. “I want to fuck, deep and hard, right now,” she whispered. “Is that clear enough?”
“Yes,” Phillip responded, his voice harsh. Without further ado, he rammed his cock in her to the hilt, and Maggie cried out with pleasure.
“Like this?” Phillip’s voice was still harsh, and Maggie felt the familiar thrill of his rough handling singing in her veins. She grabbed a handful of his hair and pulled hard, forcing his head back, his neck in a graceful arch. “Yes,” she groaned, and then sank her teeth into the tender flesh exposed there.
Phillip laughed breathlessly, pushing his head back down, fighting the grip of her hand in his hair until she knew it had to be painful. He forced her to let go of his neck and then grabbed her hands, effortlessly bringing them over her head and holding them with one hand.
“Hell cat,” he whispered as he pulled his rigid length out of her. Maggie purred like a cat, and Phillip laughed again, this time ruthlessly. “Pussy needs to be taught a lesson,” he told her, bending down and latching onto her shoulder with his teeth as he drove into her hard and deep again.
“Oh God,” Maggie screamed, already feeling the beginning of her orgasm rippling inside her, threatening to hurl her off the edge of the world.
Phillip let go of her shoulder with a guttural groan. “God, you love it, Maggie, hard and rough.” Phillip began pounding into her, his thrusts fast and rough. The hair on his muscular chest abraded her tender nipples with each thrust as his cock tore through her sensitive flesh, pleasure forced into her until she was overflowing with it.
Maggie screamed again as her orgasm hit with the power of a sudden, thrilling storm. She sobbed as it continued, Phillip’s cock hitting the sweet spot inside with a perfect rhythm. Too soon he grunted harshly and she felt his cock explode inside her, washing her pussy with his scalding hot seed, reigniting the climax that had started to subside.
Phillip collapsed on top of her after they had both spent their passion. He was breathing fast and hard, as
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if he’d run uphill for several miles. Maggie realized she was doing the same. They had rushed to climax, both of them straining toward it as if seeking the Holy Grail. It had been so long and she’d needed it so badly, the mind-numbing, intense pleasure that only Phillip and Jonathan had ever given her. It was here, lying with them passionately, that Maggie felt she could truly be herself. She could be demanding and wild, even violent, in pursuit of her pleasure. They pushed her to it and they relished it.
Phillip began to chuckle softly against her shoulder. “What?” she asked, still slightlybreathless. At the sound of her voice, Phillip raised himself up slightly, his weight on his arms. “Better?” he asked, leaning down to kiss her temple. She nodded, and he pulled back again to look in her face. She saw his gaze rove from her hair to her chin and finally to her eyes.
“Why were you laughing?” she asked him quietly, reaching up to brush a wayward curl from his forehead.
He smiled wickedly. “I don’t think I’ve fucked you that quickly since the early days of our marriage.”
Maggie joined her laughter to his. “No, I don’t think you have, although now I know what to do when you are. Believe me I got as much pleasure from it as you did.”
Phillip rolled over to lie next to Maggie and pulled her over until she was cuddled against him, her head on his shoulder. “Again?” he asked wickedly, nuzzling the hair on top of her head.
Maggie laughed the low seductive laugh she’d never known she possessed until Phillip had shown her what sex could be between a man and a woman. It no longer surprised her to hear it. More and more she felt like that woman with them, even when they weren’t in bed. She felt so free sometimes, she just wanted to laugh out loud and spin around with her arms thrown wide to embrace the world.
“Soon,” she told him and cuddled closer, throwing her leg over his and nestling it high between his thighs.
“Keep that up, and it will be very soon,” Phillip growled into her hair.
Maggie laughed again and ran her hand across his chest, rubbing his nipples and combing through the blond curls there. She kissed his shoulder. “Tell me,” she said simply.
Phillip went still. He knew what she meant, she could tell. “Tell you what?” he hedged. “How much I want you again?”
“Phillip,” she admonished, her tone gently chiding.
He sighed. “I suppose you’re talking about Jonathan,” he said resignedly.
“I need to know. I miss him.” Unexpected tears came to her eyes and fell to Phillip’s shoulder.
“Christ,” Phillip grumbled, turning Maggie’s face up to his. “Please don’t cry, darling. He’s fine.”
“Then why isn’t he here?” she cried. “I need him. Doesn’t he want me anymore?”
“What?” Phillip’s voice was loud with consternation. “How could you even think that? He loves you, Maggie, of course he wants you.”
“He isn’t here.” That seemed the most damning piece of evidence to Maggie. If he still loved her and
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