In the Kingdom's Name (Guardian of Scotland Book 2) (10 page)

William sat in the dark chamber—dark like the black scourge spreading through his heart. Two days ago he’d retreated into solitude and hadn’t emerged since. Without a candle or lamp, and the furs pulled across the window, the only hint to the time of day was the regular tolling of the chapel bells. All the while he sat in there as his heart sank deeper into the abyss of self-loathing.

Only he was to blame.

He’d lost not only a patriot, but a true friend.

And he’d lost Eva, the one woman he’d ever loved.

After Eva’s disappearance, William had removed the bit of lead from Andrew’s shoulder himself. But his efforts were for naught. He even doubted such a small piece from the arrow tip would cause so much illness to an otherwise healthy man in his prime. Regardless, Sir Andrew Murray died that eve and there hadn’t been a damned thing William could do to prevent it.

Aye, Murray’s death was a devastating loss for the Patriotic Party, but that wasn’t why William sat motionless in his unlit chamber. Once he’d searched every corner of Dirleton Castle, he’d realized his deepest fears had been realized. She was gone for good.

Faster than he could blink, she’d vanished. He’d only averted his eyes long enough to collect the lancet from the floor. But just as she’d warned him time and time again, by his insistence, Eva had tried to do something that was meant to alter events already written in the stars by God Almighty.

William touched his cheek where a wee puff of air had skimmed past—his last hint that she’d existed—the only hint that something grave had happened. There were no footsteps, no creaks, or banging of doors. Eva had made no movement whatsoever.

She’d vanished.

Mayhap it was Satan’s magic that brought her
.

But William’s heart told him differently. It ached like someone had reached through his rib cage and crushed his heart between the jaws of a vise.

“Whatever happens, I love you.” He recounted Eva’s last words.
I was too embroiled in my own bloody anger to acknowledge her. I just glared at the woman like a damned, ox-brained bastard
.

A rap sounded at the door.

William did nothing but blink.

The door creaked open and the blinding light from a torch shone inside. “Willy, are ye in here?” It was John Blair’s voice.

“Leave me be.”

The priest stepped inside and closed the door. “I have for near two days.” He strode to the hearth and used the torch to light the peat and the candles, then snuffed it.

All the while William stared at the floor.

With a grunt, Blair sat in the chair opposite at the small, round table. “All men die. And ye ken as well as I, every time a man picks up his sword, he places his life in peril. Sir Andrew will be remembered for his service to Scotland.”

A fire flared in his gut. “Aye. There’s no need to lecture me.”

“Ye’ve been holed up in here for days whilst the Kingdom in your care crumbles about our ears.” Blair pulled a flagon from his belt. “Have a tot. It’ll set ye to rights.”

William licked his chapped lips and raised his chin. He didn’t want a blasted thing, especially a sermon from a damned priest.

Blair poured and pushed the cup across the table. “Now put this into your gullet.”

William stared at the cup for a moment.
Did I hear Blair right? Is something amiss? Why couldn’t the monk have just left me be?
He groaned.
Damnation, I have a responsibility to the Kingdom of Scotland to wrench myself away from this miserable melancholy. But Lord in heaven, I dunna want to.

With a sharp nod, he pursed his lips, grasped the cup, and sipped.

Blair rocked back in his chair. “I’ll wager that’s better already.”

The whisky burned a fire down William’s throat and sloshed in his stomach like it was still ablaze. William watched the remaining amber liquid swirl.

“What happened to the woman?” Blair asked.

Clenching his fist, William looked up. “Why should ye have a care? Ye never favored Eva overmuch.”

“’Twasna a matter of whether or not I liked the lass. ’Tis just I ken when something’s amiss and nothing ever seemed right with that one.” The priest shook his head. “She spun a thick blanket of wool across your eyes for certain.”

The whisky twisting around his stomach shot through to the tips of his fingers. “I ought to plant my knuckles in your flapping jaw for that.” William held up his fist. “She only tried to help. Though she was unfamiliar with our ways, she was always willing to learn and do what she could—far more than most of the men in our garrison.”

“But ye just said it—she was unfamiliar with our ways. I always thought there was something sinister about her—something
unholy
.”

“Och, ye daft friar, that wasn’t it at all. Ye didna appreciate her for her efforts.”

“Oh?” Blair’s eyes grew wide. “Then confess to me, your personal chaplain. Show me the error of my ways. What are these secrets locked in your heart that are eating ye from the inside out?”

William turned the cup between his fingers before tipping it up and sculling the rest. “Ye’d never believe it.”

“Och aye? I’m a man of faith. I believe that Jesus walked on water and Moses parted the Red Sea. Come, lad, have out with it.”

Hell, William would probably never see Eva again. What would it hurt to share the truth with his closest friend? “I trust ye more than my own kin.”

“I reckon that’s why I’m sitting here and not your brothers Malcolm or John.”

Reaching for the flagon, William poured himself another tot. A larger portion this time. “She came from the future.” He snorted. “Sent here to write my story.”

Blair gaped. “Now I’ve heard some tall tales in my life, but that one’s got to be taller than the highest peak in Scotland.”

William pounded his fist on the table. “I said ye wouldna believe me. Worse, she told me over and over that she couldna do anything to affect the outcome of events already foretold, but I forced her into Andrew’s chamber—forced her to attempt something to help him. I only averted my eyes for a moment, and the next thing I kent, she’d vanished. Just like she’d warned would happen.”

“Vanished?” The priest’s jaw dropped like a simpleton.

William batted his hand through the air. “Believe what ye like. I ken what happened and I’m sick to death that I forced her to do something that would rip us apart.”

Blair narrowed his eyes. “Ye’re serious?”

“I should have kept my mouth shut.”

Clutching the wooden cross at his chest in his fist, Blair shook his head. “But ’tis not like ye to believe such sorcery—that which can only be from Satan himself. ’Tis a good thing she’s gone. The woman was a temptress, I kent it in my verra bones.”

“Ye’re wrong about her. Have been all along.” Clenching every muscle in his body, William glared back at Blair, personal chaplain or nay, the man was dead wrong.

“I suppose that doesna matter now.”

“Aye?” William slammed his fist on the table. “I’ll not stand for ye sullying her name. Eva MacKay was a good woman. She had a kinder heart than ye or me, and I’ll not tolerate an evil word against her.”

Blair jolted upright. “Bloody Christmas, I think ye need a slice of roast mutton with your spirit.”

“Nay, ye’ll not skirt around it. I’ll have your word right here and now, ye will not speak out against her.”

“Och, ye ken I wouldna, and it vexes me ye feel ye have to ask.”

“Then we’ll not speak of her again.” William took another sip of whisky and blinked to clear his watering eyes. He’d been wallowing in his misery long enough. No commander ever held his ground by hiding in the dark. “What was it ye said about the Kingdom falling to pieces?”

“Reports have come in about plundering all along the border. Word spread of your chasing the Earl of March out of Scotland and everyone is raring for a piece of it.”

William sat a little straighter. “’Tis good to hear.” And there he’d expected news of another English invasion.

“Aye, but they’re looting churches and monasteries.”

William frowned and drew his fingers down his unkempt beard. “I say we join them. The only way we can ensure the English stay out of Scotland is to invade and attack the very heart of the lion that attempted to oppress us.” He stood and swayed a bit. “Assemble my lieutenants at once.”

Blair hopped to his feet and snatched the flagon. “I’ll have Robbie bring up some food as well, else ye’ll be in your cups afore ye reach the solar.”

Cranked up to the fastest setting, the wipers beat a relentless rhythm, sweeping away water from the windscreen, but still could not keep pace with the driving rain. Eva gripped the steering wheel in her fists and leaned as far forward as possible. She strained to focus on the stretch of road in front of her as she punched the brakes for the turn at the unmarked road at Fail.

She hadn’t been behind the wheel for months. Everything seemed alien. The car fishtailed until it came to a stop sideways on the B730. Thank God no other vehicles were in sight.

“Shit,” she cursed, frustrated with the weather and everything else that had delayed her.

Having attended high school and college in the United States, she’d only driven with the steering wheel on the right side of the car for a couple of weeks before ending up in 1297. Driving in such bad weather, her instincts took over and she’d already ended up on the wrong side of the road twice.

Downshifting in to first, the gears ground as she let out the clutch and proceeded onto the unmarked road until she reached the ruin on the Fail Water. Shrouded in the colors of autumn and darkened by pelting rain, the remains of the old monastery looked completely different than they had the last time Eva parked outside the abandoned rubble.

When she clicked the handle, the wind caught the door and yanked it from her grasp.

She snatched her hand to her chest and peered through the windscreen up at the dark grey sky. “You’re really mad, aren’t you?” A gust of wind yanked back the door further as the car shuddered.

With a shiver, Eva reached inside her shift and pulled out the medallion. Running her thumb over the Latin inscription, she translated,
truth is like a beacon
. Turning it over, she digested the second part of the axiom,
but few choose to follow
.

I have always built my life upon the foundation of truth.

From the look of the dark clouds hanging low above, it could be days before it stopped raining. And in no way could she allow herself to be flung into the thirteenth century with an umbrella or a rain slicker. If anyone besides William saw her, she’d be in deep shit.

A little rain never hurt anyone
.

After she hid the keys under the passenger seat as she and Walter had discussed, she took in a deep breath and made a mad dash for the center of what once would have been the nave of the ruins. Grabbing the outsides of her arms, Eva hugged herself against the instant cold and wet from the driving rain.

As she’d done on the two other occasions when she’d time traveled, Eva stared up at the rose window embellishing the only complete wall left standing. “It’s me again.” Her teeth chattered as rain pelted her face and dribbled down her chin. But she forced her arms down and stood completely straight. “I know I let William push me too far, but how on earth would I have saved Sir Andrew? He was so sick. I’ve never seen anyone suffer so badly from a wound. But I still stand by my point. I couldn’t have saved him. For goodness sakes, I have absolutely no medical training whatsoever.”

Nothing happened—no lightning overhead like the last time, just the downpour continuing to soak through her kirtle and shift.

“Please, the truth is my beacon and I will always follow it.” She held up the medallion. “Just as it is inscribed right here. You wanted me to have this—encouraged Walter to put me on the dig team last summer. I know it wasn’t fate.”

She stared at the rose window and watched heavy droplets of water streak from the ledge twenty feet down to the ground. “This cannot be over.”

Rain streamed into her eyes, but she wasn’t about to give up. “Why did you send me there in the first place, if you intended for me to be hurled back without my writings? What was the purpose of my visit? You knew I would fall in love with him. You knew I wouldn’t be able to take losing him—at least not yet. Dammit, I planned on a year. Couldn’t you give me that? One lousy year of happiness with him?”

She walked in a circle, rubbing the outsides of her arms. “I tried so hard not to change anything—to be helpful—to prove that I could survive. Do you know how difficult that’s been for me? I’m from a wealthy family that takes luxurious vacations on private islands in Fiji. But did I complain about bathing in a river? About sleeping in a cave when William’s rebels were just getting started? No! I accepted everything thrown my way without complaint.”

All the memories from the past six months hit her in the gut like the force from an iron hammer. “Jesus Christ, I’ve even overcome my fear of knives…well, almost. Sharp objects will probably always make me squeamish, but I haven’t freaked out in months. I’ve hung in there. I stood by and watched the horrific Battle of Stirling Bridge and was on hand to assist Brother Bartholomew. I helped Paden and Adam, and especially Robbie—stood in as their surrogate mother. And I’m only twenty-seven fucking years old!”

Eva slammed her fist into her palm. “Come on. I’m pleading. I’m begging. I cannot walk away from William right now. I’m not ready. I need him. He needs me. We need each other.”

She stamped her foot so hard, pain seared all the way up to her thigh. “I’m a widow for Chrissake. The first love of my life ended up stabbed to death in a New York subway, and now you cut short the fleeting bit of happiness I had with William? How can you do this to me? I’m. Not. Ready. Goddammit!”

Shivering, her gown soaked through, Eva stood in the center of the ruin and glared at the rose window while unrelenting rain pummeled her body. Her throat thickened while the rain commingled with her tears.

“I’m not leaving.”

Distant thunder rumbled, and Eva finally gave in and rubbed the outside of her arms and bounced her legs to keep warm. “Please, send me back.”

Her teeth chattered and she stole a glance at the Fiat. She could turn on the engine and run the heater, but that would be like giving up. “Please,” she whispered. Closing her eyes, she pictured the monastery with walls and a solid roof as it had been when she’d arrived in the midst of a battle in 1297. She saw William’s face—the intensity of his crystal blue eyes when he stared at her from across the fire.

Eva rocked to assuage the cold. “Please.”

She dropped to her knees and curled into a ball. “I have no other place to go. William is my home. I can’t just leave it like this. Please, please, please, send me back.”

***

By the time the headlights of a car bombarded her with blinding light, Eva had grown numb to the icy cold of the pelting rain, though her teeth refused to stop chattering. The car door slammed. Eva squinted and shaded her eyes against the brightness. The outline of a man moved toward her, carrying an umbrella in one hand and a torch in another.

“Eva?” It was Walter’s voice. “Come, I’ll drive you back to Glasgow.” As he walked forward, the torch blinded him—the battery-operated kind. Then his car drove off.

Eva stared at the black galoshes that stopped beside her. “I-I’m n-not going.” So wracked by excessive tremors, she could hardly force the words out.

“You can do what you like, but you’ll most likely have pneumonia by morning.”

“I h-have to find a way back.” Water streamed into her mouth.

“I’m afraid that portal has been closed, just as it was for me—and I only spent a matter of minutes in the past.” He held the umbrella over her, though it didn’t make much difference. “Come, let’s see you dried off. Do you have a place to stay?”

“N-no. Hotel, I guess.”

He gave her arm a gentle tug. “It’s time to give it up, lass.”

She yanked away. “Never. Not g-giving up.”

“Well, at least come with me for tonight. Chrissy has gone to see her parents and I’m here to take your car as you asked. You may intend to die of exposure out here in the driving rain, but I assure you, I’m planning on having a long life.”

Eva didn’t budge.

“Look, I reckon you’ve been out here at least five hours. The magic would have worked by now. It’s not only dark, it’s cold, and I’m not about to leave you in the midst of this downpour.”

With a shudder, she looked up at the wheel-shaped window. “I might concede defeat for today, but I’m not about to give up.”

Walter offered his hand. “There’s a good lass.”

He led her to the car and helped her climb into the passenger side. “Do you have anything dry to change into?”

She crouched forward, gripping her arms tight to her body. “I might have a blanket in the back.”

The gravel crunched under his feet as he went around and opened the hatch. “You’re in luck.” He tossed up the plaid she’d left there when she’d first joined the dig team.

That seems like an eon ago
. Eva pulled the wool around her shoulders and used the edge to wring out her hair while she still shivered.

Walter revved the engine and cranked up the heat. “It’ll be toasty warm in here in a minute.”

Her lips quivering out of control, all she could do was nod.

“Tell you what.” He put the car in gear and headed north. “I’ll let you stay in my spare room until you can find a place of your own.”

She gave him a sideways glance. She had no intention of staying anywhere for long.

“How does that sound?”

But still, he’d gone out of his way to pick her up. “T-that’s very kind. Thank you.” The warmth from the heater brought back the feeling in her toes.

“Do you have any money? I might be able to find you a position at the university until you can find a job.”

“Are you serious?” He knew she was loaded. Nonetheless, she shook her head. “I have the money from the insurance settlement.” She snorted with a smirk. “Unless someone cleaned out my bank accounts while I was gone.”

Walter chuckled. “Well that’s good, then. You can start in on writing the articles about your time there—I’ve no doubt they’ll sell.”

She nodded and stared out the window.

“Have you any ideas for a title?” he asked as if he seriously believed she’d be staying more than a day.

She blinked and studied a stream of water as it trailed sideways on its way down the glass. “No.” A tear leaked from her eye and slowly dribbled down her face—just like the rainwater she watched.

He clicked on the blinker and proceeded through a roundabout. “You know, this is probably for the best. If you’d stayed much longer…well, it would have been that much more difficult.”

Eva’s gut clamped into a knot. “Look, I gave myself a year. That means I’ve got six more months.” She pulled the blanket tighter around her shoulders. “I’d give anything to spend that time with him.”
And maybe a wee bit more
.

“And then what?”

She whipped her head around. “What are you doing? Are you trying to talk me out of going back? Because if you are, you can stop it right now. I do appreciate that you came after me, but I never felt for anyone the way I feel for William, and God dammit, I’ll take every moment I can with him. I don’t think about the future.”

“No?”

“No. I do not. All that exists for us is the now.”

Walter pursed his lips and drove on while the wipers hammered a morose rhythm.