In Love and War (40 page)

They left the ambulance spanking clean and ready for next day and made their way to the walled garden, following the sound of music and singing that echoed round the grounds of the old priory, followed by enthusiastic applause.

They found seats amongst the nurses, doctors and auxiliaries who sat with their patients, some of the men lying on their beds that had been wheeled out into the grounds for the evening's entertainment.

Felicia was in the middle of ‘I'm always Chasing Rainbows', which she followed quickly with ‘Oh! How I hate to Get Up in the Morning'
,
‘I'm sorry I made you Cry', and when she ended with ‘Home Sweet Home' there was hardly a dry eye in the audience. The dancers limped through ‘Tiger Rag' but it was received rapturously, and then Felicia as a finale dedicated ‘The Rose of No Man's Land' not only to the nurses but to all the women who risked their lives at the front.

Thunderous applause drowned the rumble of the heavy artillery and Felicia, together with her troupe, took so many bows that in the end they begged to be allowed to leave the stage and rest. Boss strode up to Felicia and slapped her on the back. ‘That was inspiring and wonderful. Thank you.'

Felicia stared at her in surprise. ‘It's heartfelt, but it's what we do and have been doing since the war began.'

‘You deserve to go home,' Boss said in a choked voice. ‘I've had a word with my superiors and you and your ladies will be taken to St Omer tomorrow or the next day, depending on how many casualties need to be moved, and you'll leave on the troop train for Calais.'

Elsie had been sitting beside Rosemary and she leapt to her feet to congratulate Felicia, but quite suddenly the world seemed to spin around her in concentric circles. Voices grew louder and then faded away, and she felt herself falling into a deep, dark abyss.

SHE COULD HEAR
muffled voices that seemed to fade away into whirring silence only to return again with more insistence. Sometimes it was her mother's voice, faint and very far away, and then Guy was speaking to her in such hushed tones that she could not make out the words. She wanted to tell him to speak up and come closer but her efforts were in vain and he faded into nothingness. She was vaguely aware of faces leaning close to hers but she did not recognise any of them, and when she tried to communicate they did not seem to understand. She was swimming in an inky sea with the waters closing over her head. If she opened her eyes she could see the sunlight sparkling above her but her limbs were leaden and she could not give the push needed to take her to the surface. Down she went, sinking deeper and deeper until she hit the bottom with a bump.

‘Elsie, can you hear me?' The voice was familiar but still far away. ‘I think she opened her eyes, for a moment, doctor.'

Someone was holding her hand. Elsie forced her eyelids to open, trying hard to focus.

‘Elsie, my dear, you've come back to us.'

‘Felicia?'

‘Yes, darling, it's me.' Felicia's features were becoming clearer and to her surprise Elsie realised that she was crying. She had never seen Felicia moved to tears.

‘Why are you crying?' she murmured, mystified.

‘Me? Crying? What nonsense.' Felicia dashed her hand across her eyes. ‘You've been very ill, and I thought we'd lose you, but you're on the mend now, darling.'

A man Elsie did not recognise peered over Felicia's shoulder. ‘I think she'd better rest now, Miss Wilby. Elsie has a long way to go before she's fully recovered.'

Felicia released Elsie's hand and stood up. ‘Yes, doctor, of course. I do understand.'

The doctor took Elsie's temperature and placed his stethoscope on her chest. He listened and then unplugged it from his ears with a satisfied nod. ‘A remarkable recovery, but now it's rest, rest and more rest for you, young lady.'

‘Thank you, doctor,' Felicia said humbly. ‘I'm very grateful for all you've done, especially under the circumstances.'

‘There's little enough I can do against this terrible disease. Spanish flu has killed millions.' He picked up his bag. ‘I'll see myself out. Just make sure Miss Mead has plenty of fluids and try to build up her strength with small meals. My late mother used to swear by calves' foot jelly.'

‘I'll send Gerda to Fortnum's right away. They're sure to have stock ready for such emergencies.'

‘Good day, Miss Wilby. I'll call again tomorrow.' He lowered his voice. ‘But should her condition deteriorate don't hesitate to send for me.'

Felicia moved to the door and opened it. ‘I will, and thank you again, doctor.' She closed it after him and went to stand by the bed, looking down at Elsie with a smile of sheer relief. ‘I thought we'd lost you.'

‘Where am I?' Elsie asked dazedly. ‘The last thing I remember was being at your concert in the priory grounds, and then nothing.'

‘Don't overtax yourself, darling. You're back in your old room in my flat, and you're on the mend, that's all that matters. I'm going to tell Gerda to make you a nice cup of tea. How about that?'

‘A cup of tea would be lovely, but how did I get here?'

Felicia leaned over to plump up the pillows behind Elsie's head. ‘I insisted on bringing you home. Your formidable boss lady found us places on one of the trains taking the injured to Calais, and we returned to England on a troop ship. Now no more questions. You heard what the doctor said: you must rest.'

‘Just one thing,' Elsie said weakly. ‘How long have I been like this?'

‘Two weeks – two long and exhausting weeks when we didn't know whether you'd pull through. Gerda and I have taken it in turn to sit up all night with you, but now we can relax and help you regain your strength.'

Elsie lay quietly after Felicia had left the room. She had lost two whole weeks of her life but she knew that she was extremely lucky to have survived the vicious onslaught of the killer disease. She dozed off, and awakened for long enough to sip a cup of sweet, milky tea before sinking into a deeper and more natural sleep.

For several days Elsie drifted between waking and sleeping. On a diet of calves' foot jelly laced with sherry, chicken broth made especially for her by Gerda, and milk puddings that normally she would have refused, she gradually regained her strength to the extent that after a week the doctor allowed her to sit out of bed in the afternoons. Felicia read excerpts from the newspapers, keeping Elsie up to date with the progress of the war, and a letter arrived from Rosemary making light of their trials and stressing the fact that Elsie was missed by everyone.

‘Is that from your friend Rosie?' Felicity asked casually. ‘She was very distressed when you were taken ill, but I've been sending reports of your progress. I just hope they reached her.'

Elsie looked up from the crumpled letter with a misty smile. ‘I don't know, because this one has taken nearly two weeks to get here. She says she hopes I won't be away too long.'

‘Don't even think of returning yet,' Felicia said severely. ‘The doctor told me that you'll take weeks, even months, to recover your strength fully. You wouldn't be much use to them in that state.'

‘Yes, of course you're right.' Elsie felt the ready tears stinging the back of her eyes. She knew it was just weakness that made her cry at the slightest thing, but she missed her friends and she felt like a fraud lying about all day while they risked their lives on the front line.

Felicia delved in her pocket and pulled out another grubby envelope. ‘Cheer up, darling. I've kept the best 'til last. I suspect that this is from Guy. You kept calling for him when you were delirious.'

Elsie's hand shook as she opened the envelope, taking care not to tear it. ‘I haven't heard from him for months.' She scanned the brief letter with tears running freely down her cheeks. ‘He's safe, or he was when he wrote this. It's taken nearly three months to find me.'

‘It's hardly surprising, Elsie,' Felicia said in a bracing tone. ‘It's a wonder that post gets through at all. As long as you don't receive an official telegram you know that he's survived.'

‘Yes, of course. I know that, but I can't help worrying, especially with all this time on my hands.'

‘The doctor said you can get up for longer but you mustn't overdo it, and as soon as you feel stronger we'll go out for a carriage ride in Hyde Park. We'll wait for a nice day, and the fresh air will work wonders. Anthea is coming home at the weekend so you'll have young company for a change.'

Elsie reached out to touch Felicia's hand. ‘I'll be delighted to see her, but you've been wonderful. I don't know why you've been so good to me when we're not related in any way, but I am grateful.'

‘Don't be silly,' Felicia said, her thin cheeks flushing with colour. ‘Of course I've looked after you: you're practically one of the family. If I'd had a daughter I would have been proud to have had one just like you.'

‘You'll make me cry again,' Elsie said, sniffing. ‘You must have better things to do than sit with me. What about your stage work and the concert parties?'

‘The girls and I have earned a brief respite, darling. As to the stage, I've been offered a part in
Chu Chin Chow
at His Majesty's because one of the female leads is leaving. The show has been a terrific success and will probably run and run.'

‘But you're undecided?'

‘We've done so much for the boys on the front that it feels as if I'd be letting them down by staying in London.'

‘I'm sure the theatre gives pleasure to many of the men who've come home on leave, and you've done more than your fair share in Flanders.'

Felicia gave her a searching look. ‘What would you do in my place?'

‘I don't know, but the war can't last forever, although I feel much as you do in that I ought to hurry up and get better so that I can return to France to see this thing through.'

‘We'll see,' Felicia said vaguely. ‘Anyway, what does Guy say? Just spare me the romantic bits.'

‘He begs me to keep out of harm's way, which is rich coming from a man who didn't have to put himself forward and could have stayed safe in a desk job.'

‘We do what we feel we must do,' Felicia said, sighing. ‘Marianne has put herself out of action by getting pregnant. Life goes on, I suppose.'

Suddenly Felicia looked her age and her former glamour seemed to have deserted her, leaving her looking thin and frail. ‘I think you should take the stage part,' Elsie said slowly. ‘You've been a heroine, Felicia. Let someone else take over now.'

‘You mean I'm looking old and past it,' Felicia said with a wry smile. ‘Don't deny it, darling. My mirror tells me the same thing every morning, and to be perfectly frank I could do with the money. Voluntary work is all very well but it doesn't pay the bills.'

‘And I should be thinking about going back to work.' Elsie rose unsteadily to her feet. ‘I can't sponge off you forever.'

‘I'm not on the breadline yet, so you mustn't worry. It's just that I'm used to a certain standard of living when I'm at home, and I have to think of my future.'

Elsie leaned over to brush Felicia's cheek with a kiss. ‘You're a wonderful woman and I love you.' She straightened up, steadying herself with one hand on the back of the sofa. ‘I'm going to try to make it to the bathroom on my own, even though my legs feel like jelly. If I can't return to duty in France, maybe I can go back to my job in Room 40. I'm lucky to be alive and I know it.'

Felicia stood up. ‘I'm right behind you. Sing out if you need a helping hand, darling.'

‘Thanks, but I'm determined to make it this time.' Elsie reached the door and clutched the lintel, taking deep breaths. ‘I can do it, Felicia. It might just take a bit of time, but I'll get there in the end.'

It was Friday afternoon when Anthea arrived at the flat in Cromwell Road. She breezed into the drawing room, taking off her leather helmet and gauntlets and tossing them onto a chair by the door. Elsie had her feet up on the sofa but she swivelled round with a cry of delight. ‘Welcome home.'

Felicia looked up from the script she was studying and smiled. ‘Yes, welcome home, darling.'

‘Thanks, Auntie. It's good to be home.' Anthea hurried over to the sofa and sat down beside Elsie, giving her a hug. ‘It's a relief to see you looking well. You gave us all a terrible fright.'

‘I owe it all to Felicia. I don't know what would have happened if she hadn't brought me back to London.'

Felicia rose from her chair and tugged at the old-fashioned bell pull. ‘This calls for a cup of tea, or would you prefer something stronger? I managed to secrete several bottles of Chambertin in my luggage when we returned from France.'

‘A glass of wine would be lovely.' Anthea bent down to unlace her boots. ‘I've ridden all the way from Norfolk and I'm absolutely whacked.'

Felicia tugged again at the bell pull. ‘Damn. I forgot that I gave Gerda the afternoon off. I won't be long, girls. You can catch up but save the best bits for when I return with the wine.' She strolled out of the room leaving the door open as if afraid she might be missing something.

‘Dear Felicia,' Anthea said with an affectionate smile. ‘She never changes.'

‘You should have seen her in France. She was a different person there, Anthea. But for her I might have died.'

‘I know. She kept me posted and I'm jolly glad she did. I was worried about you and so was she.'

‘Well, as you can see now, I'm very much better.' Elsie leaned back against the silk cushions. ‘That's enough about me – what about you? You certainly look a picture of health. The outdoor life seems to suit you.'

Anthea leaned closer, waving her left hand under Elsie's nose. ‘I want you to be the first to know.'