Imperative: Volume 2, A Tale of Pride and Prejudice (85 page)

“He did try.  I . . . I mortified him.  I spoke of what might have been.”  She saw Elizabeth stiffen.  “I was not wishing for him . . . Mrs. Darcy, whether you realize it or not, you and Mr. Darcy display quite clearly that you are very deeply attached.  I cannot fathom it, and frankly I do not want it.  But I do want to feel . . . I want to experience . . .” She faltered and shook her head.  “I
do
care for my husband.”

“I am glad to know you were not trying to throw yourself at mine.” 

“No . . .”

“But you admire that he is . . . whole.  Unlike your husband.” 

She sighed.  “Yes.  Fitzwilliam, as horrified with the conversation as he was, gave me the male’s perspective that I needed to hear.”

“And that was?”  Elizabeth asked curiously. 

“Not to stop trying.”

“Have you?”

“I was quite satisfied until I saw you and Fitzwilliam again.”

“I will not apologize, I rather love my Will.”  Elizabeth smiled. “Stare at your own husband.  He might just like it, and want to know why you are looking, and . . . once he becomes used to it, he might try to keep you from looking away.  May I say that Fitzwilliam is the most jealous man I know?  As annoying as it sometimes is, I would be in quite a state the day that he doesn’t fix me with that stare.”   She saw Anne look down.  “I realize that the viscount cannot respond easily, but just because he cannot complete the act, does not mean that his mind does not feel desire, and his heart is unable to be opened and touched.  One of the greatest joys of our marriage has been discovering different ways to express affection.  Why not start by holding his hand?  In the same bed?”  Elizabeth got to her feet and walked to the door.  “And Lady Gladney, if I ever catch you contemplating Mr. Darcy again, I assure you; my claws are kept quite sharp.  And you know that I am no pushover.” 

“ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN, DARCY?  This is the longest we have been under the same roof since your father died.” 

“Uncle, if you care to examine the reasons for that occurrence you will understand why I did not encourage meeting more often.”  Darcy watched him walk to the bottles of port and held up his hand when a stopper was lifted.  “No, thank you.”

“To the port or the continued reunion?”  Reluctantly, he replaced the stopper and took a seat.  “I realize that I tried to use you.”

“As do I.  And now that you have the money from Rosings and Richard settled, it is time to return to the way things were?”  Darcy’s head shook.  “Not in an instant, I am not that forgiving.  Impress Mr. Kelly with your incredible welcome, but you and I have history.”

Laughing softly, Lord Matlock sat back.  “You are no easy mark.”

“I dislike that you would think me one at all, but I am grown now.” 

“Yes, you certainly are.  Your father would be proud.” 

“I wonder about that.”  Darcy looked down at his hands and sighed.   “No offense, Uncle, but . . . I appreciate the efforts you are making, and the difficulties you have recently overcome, but honestly, I am tired of not being at home.  We will hold a ball in a few months; you are welcome to come then.  Perhaps Cathy will meet . . . someone.”

“I can only hope.  She is becoming bitter, which is not attractive.”  He sighed and then started to laugh.  “I remember that ball we attended.  There she was, approaching me in the card room, dragging that hapless half-wit Walker by his buttonhole, or was it his cock?   Lord, that man thought he had found the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.  The daughter of an earl bringing him to meet her father . . . What became of your idiot tenants?” 

“My steward will be supervising their representative coming to remove their personal belongings next week.  Where they will go is not my concern.”  He stared out of the window.   “If their claims had been true, he would have been a possibility for her.” 

“She saw him for what he was and pounced on the chance to embarrass him.  She resembles her mother in that.”

“Elizabeth just described her as soft on the inside.” 

“Really?”  Lifting his chin thoughtfully he looked at the ceiling.  “She certainly harbours hopes, but she does not do well fulfilling them.” 

“What do you think of . . . no, forget it.”

“Speak up!”

“One of the Kelly boys?  Robert is heir of a fine estate, although truthfully it is Stephen who looks at her.”

“No.  She would never settle for that.  Her sights are high, and with good reason, look at her origins.”  His hand waved over the ornate room.  “Her mother would never accept it.”  

“Aunt seems tolerant of your new relations, but less so than you.”

“Your aunt, well, she is the daughter of an Earl as well.  She is rather enjoying the wide-eyed behaviour of Mrs. Kelly.”

“Has she changed?  Has near ruin humbled her?”

“Certainly, but that does not change who she is.”

“It did you.” Darcy traced his finger on the arm of his chair and spoke uncomfortably.  “Anne is over the first blush of joy in marriage and realizing that she has nothing to look forward to . . . as a woman.” 

The earl’s brow creased, “Did Elizabeth say something?”

“Unfortunately my information came directly from Anne.”

“Good Lord.  No man should be subjected to such a conversation!” 

“I admit that I nearly ran from the room, and I regret it as Elizabeth clearly needed me at that moment, but I could not remain.”  His eyes closed. “Speak to your son, Uncle. The woman needs some kind of physical demonstration of affection to help with her disappointed hopes of being a mother.  I know that Uncle Harding has become a great confidant of his, their mutual experience with the opium has bonded them in ways that I hope aids them both.”

“Yes, I have thanked him for it.  He seemed very humbled by it.  I never expected that sort of reaction.  It reminded me of a younger version of him, when he first married.  I had nearly forgotten that man ever existed.” 

Darcy spoke softly as he looked to his father’s signet ring.  “That is good to know.”

“I still fear Albert doing himself harm, you are right to recommend I speak to him about expressing affection for Anne.  With your uncle returned home, he will need a new confidant.” 

“Letters are fine, but not the same, particularly if suicide is the plan.  I am glad that my aunt no longer fears my uncle taking such a step.  Hope has given them both new purpose.”

“Yes, but a bit of the old reappeared this week.  It was odd how he seemed to almost panic when he saw you drinking the orgeat at the wedding breakfast.”  Lord Matlock rubbed his chin.  “I was certain he was going to knock it from your hand.”

“Yes, I thought so, as well.”  Darcy shrugged, “I am not particularly fond of it, not after that experience this winter.”

“That is correct!  I had forgotten about you, sick in that bookcase!  No wonder his instinct was to protect you.”  Lord Matlock smiled.  “What a time you have had.”

“Yes, sir.  And that is precisely why we will not remain.  I need to take my wife home.  She is tired.  Very tired, and has been for some time.” 

Lord Matlock’s brow creased and he leaned forward, “Is she unwell?”

“No, sir.  She is tired.”  He smiled and stood.  “As am I.” 

“I MUST ASK . . .”  Richard leaned over to Darcy while he watched his new relatives exclaim over Gladney House.  It was their opportunity to tour Sophie’s new home before they continued their journey to Scotland.  “Did you prepare that wedding gift all alone?” 

“Hmm?”  Darcy said innocently, “What do you mean?”

“Did your dear wife know the contents of
all
of the boxes?”

“The shortbread?  Oh yes, she was hard-pressed not to eat it . . .”  Grinning, he clapped Richard’s back when he moaned.  “Who do you think cut off the end of the condom?” 

“Good Lord!” 

“Did you show it to Sophie?”

“Are you insane?  And tell her what it was and why I used to wear them?”  Richard shook his head and then laughed.  “But I have to tell you, it was just what I needed at that moment.  How did you know?” 

Considering him, Darcy smiled.  “I just did.”

“Were you . . . of course, I know that your wedding night was not a real wedding night, but . . . I was grateful Sophie did not know better, if you know what I mean.”

“Was there a failure, Cousin?”  Darcy’s lips twitched.  “A misfire, perhaps?”

“Misfire?  It was as if the fuse was lit and the canon exploded instead of shooting the ball at the target!  What a mess, and poor Sophie, all braced for the impact and,” he sighed, “I knew that would amuse you.”

“Forgive me.  Has it improved?”

“Considerably.”

“Good for you.” 

“Did you ever . . .”

“No.”  Richard sighed and Darcy said quietly, “But there are times it is a miracle I have lasted more than a minute.” 

“Are we old?  Can we not hold our wads any longer?” 

“I prefer to believe that I am just so bewitched by her that I lose control. Which is likely true.”  Darcy smiled and noticed Samuel standing nearby with a grin on his face.  “You were listening.”

“I enjoy the military references.”  Strolling away, he claimed Georgiana’s arm and guided her away from Robert and Stephen. 

“He has become very adept at that.”  Richard said approvingly.  “I am glad that you allow him.” 

“It is practice for both of them, learning how to support another.”  Darcy watched them and looked back to Richard.  “Questions?  We are departing very soon . . .”

“Are you a mind-reader?”  Richard demanded.

“Hardly.”  He smiled at Elizabeth talking quietly with Sophie and then turned to his cousin.  “Well?” 

“WILL YOU BE NEEDING THESE, SIR?”  Parker asked quietly while helping Darcy to don his nightshirt.  Turning, he indicated the box on the dresser before picking up his master’s discarded clothes.  “I am afraid that I could not simply purchase one for the colonel’s wedding gift.” 

“Really?  Considering the cost and how they are reused . . .”  Darcy smiled at his man’s obvious disgust.  “No, I have no need for them.  You may discard them or . . . find a use for them, it is up to you.” 

“Very good, sir.” 

“Parker, I have been meaning to inquire, has your friendship with Judy progressed?

“Miss Orchard and I are . . . hesitant to progress on any level, Mr. Darcy.  Your gift of tolerance has cooled the flames for now.”

“I am sorry to hear that.  Or perhaps it is good if you find you are not suited for each other.”

“No sir, that is not the case at all!”  Parker said vehemently.

“All right then . . . I will leave you to your own devices.”  Darcy walked out to the bedchamber, but was still looking backwards and shaking his head. 

Elizabeth was stretched out on her stomach across the comforter and hugging her pillow.  She watched him curiously, “A penny for your thoughts.” 

Climbing onto the bed, he settled onto his side and regarded her with a small smile.  “Too many are swirling around to know which to choose.”

 “Then this could prove expensive for me.  It is a fine thing that I have a great deal of pin money at my disposal.”  Darcy chuckled and played with the hair around her face.  “I am so happy to be home.  It was only a week, but by the end it felt like a month.” 

“I know.  Too many people, with too many dramas.”  He held her eyes while he continued his gentle caress.  “Your inspired reaction to Mrs. Kelly’s references to Miss Cargill and Mrs. Dickson have, I believe, put a nail in the coffin of speculation, don’t you think?” 

“I hope so.”  Her eyes closed under the tender touch of his fingertips over her temples.  “My initial affront was purely meant as a distraction away from Georgiana.” 

“And then the lioness appeared.” 

“I do not like anyone questioning your fidelity.” 

“Ahh.”  Darcy smiled and then laughed.  “Good thing that you qualified that.  You question me constantly on one thing or another.”  Elizabeth rolled onto her side to face him and his hand moved over her shoulder.   “I suppose that we were blindly optimistic that nothing of Georgiana’s condition would be noted . . .”

“Enough people on the estate saw her; I am amazed that it did not spread while we were there.” 

“Ferguson is a good man.”

“He would be nothing without a good master.”  Elizabeth watched his eyes move from her face to his hand.  “Someday he will meet Miss Darcy.  Do you have an opinion of his admiration for Georgiana?”

“No.” 

“Stephen Kelly’s?”  Darcy’s eyes rolled.  “Samuel’s?”  Elizabeth laughed, “Now what is that look for?”

“Talk about something else.” 

“Hmm.”  She closed her eyes, his touch felt so nice.  “It is such a warm night.”

“Perhaps tonight you will learn if you mind sleeping next to me in summer.  Will you object to my warmth?”  She looked up in time to see a slow smile spreading over his face.  “Do you wish to go swimming?”

“Oh no!” 

“Time is wasting, love.  The weather will cool before you know it, and then we will be forced inside to love each other.”

“What a shame, to be private . . .” Elizabeth sighed when his mouth wandered over her throat and then suckled over the fluttering pulse.  “Ohh,” His gentle hands caressed over her breasts and paused.

“You have grown, dearest.” 

“Have I?” She said sleepily.

“mmmhmm.”  He murmured and kneeling before her, massaged from her shoulders to her hips.  With each pass, he felt her relax more, and when he saw her eyes close, he rested his hands over her belly and left them there.    Beneath his palms he felt something new, and he was afraid to move lest it disappear.  “Oh, Lizzy . . .”  He looked down, carefully lifting his hands away to stare at the thin fabric of her shift.  It was not his imagination, the swelling truly was there.  “My Elizabeth Rose . . .”  He felt emotion welling up in his chest as he bent down to kiss the precious spot. Elizabeth’s eyes opened.  Darcy smiled and laying down, kissed her.  “Sleep, love.”

“But . . . we were going to love each other . . .”

“I think that we do already.” 

“That is not what I meant, it has been so long. Will.”  Elizabeth touched his face and studied his eyes.  “Happiness radiates from you.  What has happened?  How long have I been asleep?”