Hush (6 page)

“Fuck!” someone yelled followed by the sound of something heavy crashing to the floor. “Ow! That hurt!”

I sat up startled. I tried to stand up but fell to the floor. Somehow in my sleep, I had wrapped the Siva scented blanket around my body. I quickly turned the TV off and tossed the blanket back onto the couch.

“Oh
shit, I think I’m bleeding.”

I ran out into the hall looking for the source of all the commotion.

A slumped form leaned against the
door.

“Siva!” I exclaimed.

Jacob came running from the downstairs bedroom. He was only wearing a pair of sweatpants. His body was extremely muscular and well built. But my concern was all for Siva.

“Siva?” asked Jacob. From the expression on his face I assumed he had never seen Siva like this before. I certainly hoped this wasn’t a regular habit.

Siva began to laugh. “’
What would you think if I sang out of tune. Would you stand up and walk out on me? Lend me your ears and I'll sing you a song. And I'll try not to sing out of key. Oh I get by with a little help from my friends. Mm I get high with a little help from my friends. Mm going to try with a little help from my friends,’” Siva sang. He began to laugh again. “I don’t have any friends. I’m all alone. All I do is push people away. Push, push,
push
. Just like I did with you,” he said getting to his knees. He put his arms around my waist and buried his head in my stomach. I gently stroked his soft black hair. Moisture began to soak my shirt. “Nobody’s ever cared about me. I try so hard to be good, to work hard, I just want someone to be proud of me,” he cried like a small child. “I’m never good enough.”

“Siva, you’re drunk,” I said.

He rubbed his head against my white cotton shirt.

“I know,” he said softly, “and I need a cigarette. But I promised myself I would stop for you.”

I looked pleadingly at Jacob.

“Can you help me get him to his room?”

“Certainly,” said the clearly shocked man. “Come on Siva,” he said pulling Siva’s arms from around my torso. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

Jacob and I managed to get Siva up the stairs and into his room.

His bedroom screamed luxury but with the very drunk man passed out on the bed I didn’t have the time to take in the details. I pulled off his shoes and turned to Jacob.

“Did you know about this?” I snapped at Jacob.

He looked at Siva and then at me. “No,” he said softly.  Jacob sighed and rubbed his head. “Siva asked me to stay with you. He said he had a meeting and wouldn’t be back until late. He’s never done anything like this before so I believed him.”

“Well clearly,” I said putting my hands on my hips, “he didn’t go to a meeting.”

“Clearly,” said Jacob eyeing my shirt.

“What?” I asked.

“There’s blood on your shirt,” he stated.

“Blood?” I asked and looked down at my white shirt. There was indeed blood on my shirt where Siva had rubbed his face.

“Siva,” I said.

He moaned drunkenly.

I turned on the light beside his bed so that I could see his face.

Several cuts lacerated his face.

“Siva,” I said softly. I turned to Jacob. “Help me get him to the shower?”

Jacob draped Siva’s arm across his shoulder and dragged him into the bathroom. His bathroom was much like mine, only bigger, and beige. Jacob deposited Siva on the bench seat in the shower.

“Thanks,” I said turning to the man. “I’ve got it from here.”

“You sure?”

“If I need you I’ll yell,” I smiled kindly at him.

He lingered a moment longer before disappearing.

Siva leaned his head back against the beige tile.

“What have you done?” I asked taking in his ragged appearance.

He moaned in answer. His eyes were closed and he looked miserable.

I grabbed a washcloth before I climbed in the shower and unbuttoned his shirt tossing it onto the bathroom floor.

I gasped at what met my gaze.

Siva’s perfect body was riddled and marred by many, many, little white scars.

I put my hand to my mouth to stifle my gasp of surprise.

“Oh Siva,” I whispered into my hand.

He did not stir.

I unbuckled his belt and slid his black slacks off and tossed them onto the floor with his shirt. I left him in his underwear and turned the water on. Cold.

“What the fuck?” he said coming awake.

“Language Siva,” I scolded.

“That’s fucking cold!” he cried.

“I’m aware of that,” I said, “I am in here with you.” I was also aware that my white shirt was now drenched. I crossed my arms over my chest.

“What happened to your face Siva?”

He groaned.

“Tell me,” I said. The cold water of the shower was beginning to make me shiver but I was scared to leave him in here by himself.

“Can you turn the hot water on at least?” he asked.

I gladly complied.

“So what happened?” I prompted.

Siva rubbed his face. “I was pissed.” He said. “At myself, at you, at the world,” he laughed cynically. “So, I did what I always do. I drink. I was even more on edge because I desperately needed a cigarette. So, I was sitting there in the bar drinking when that man from your work came in.”

“Mac?” I asked.

“I don’t bloody know,” he hissed. “The fucker started talking about you. He said some things… I’ll spare you the details. I didn’
t like it so I confronted him a
nd there you have it,” he said motioning to his face. He suddenly grinned. “On the bright side he looks a whole lot worse.”

I shook my head.

“So, you were what? Defending my honor?” I asked.

“Exactly,” he said.

“Siva, you don’t need to that,” I said.

“You didn’t hear what he said,” growled Siva.

“He’s still my co-worker,” I whispered. “I have to see him every day.”

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled.

“Are you?” I asked.

“No.”

“I didn’t think so,” I whispered.

Siva rubbed at his face and the dried blood.

“Here let me help you,” I grabbed the washcloth and wetted it before dabbing gently at his face,

“Are you mad at me?” he asked softly.

“Furious,” I said but I couldn’t help my smile.

He laughed gruffly. “I really shouldn’t drink. Or smoke. Or breathe for that matter.”

“Siva,” I scolded. “How could you say something like that?”

“Sloane,” he said. “You know those stories that little kids read. The ones where the princess always falls in love with the handsome prince despite the bad
guy’s
effort to thwart it?”

“Yeah,” I said wondering where he was going with this.

“I’m not the handsome prince. I’m the bad guy.”

“I don’t think that. I think that you, Siva, are the handsome prince. After all, you did rescue me from the bad guy,” I laughed lightly.

“I’ve never been the good guy. Why would I start now?” He suddenly bent over at the hips and put his head in his hands. “Ugh, my head hurts,” he moaned.

“Let me finish cleaning you up and then we’ll get some medicine in your system, deal?”

“You don’t have to do this, Sloane,” he said quietly.

“I know.”

“Then why are you?” he asked.

“Because Siva,” I said staring into his violet eyes, “sometimes people do things because they
want
to.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh,” I said wiping the dried blood from his face.

He closed his eyes and his tense muscles relaxed.

“What is it with us and showers?” he suddenly grinned.

I laughed. “This
has
been a very eventful two days. But Siva,” I said and he opened his violet eyes to meet my gold ones. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

“Good,” he smiled and closed his eyes again.

I added some sort of fancy body wash to the cloth and began to scrub his body. Seeing all those scars crisscrossing his body broke my heart. I wanted to ask him about them but I figured I could wait. I didn’t want to push him too far.

I was scrubbing his very, muscular, chest when I noticed a tattoo over his breast bone.

Saia.

Jealousy bubbled like a
hideous monster in my chest. I
was thankful that he had his eyes closed so he couldn’t see my face.
I was sure it was contorted in some form of
jealousy.
What
could this girl have meant to him if he had her name tattooed on his chest? She had to mean something to him.

I knew then that I wanted to mean something to him. I wanted to hold a special place in his heart. Even after only two days he already held a special place in mine.

“Do you want me to wash your hair?” I asked.

“Please,” he said.

I grabbed the bottle of shampoo and lathered it onto my hands. I dug my fingernails into his scalp and gently massaged.

He moaned. “That feels great.”

I smiled. I scrubbed his scalp for a couple more minutes and he hummed pleasantly in the back of his throat.

“Can you stand so I can rinse the soap out?” I asked.

“Yeah,” he said and stood up from the bench.

His muscular chest was suddenly directly in front of my face and I swallowed thickly. He was gorgeous. Model gorgeous. Siva had to be the most handsome man alive. I wanted to run my fingers over the contour of his abs, over his muscular arms.

Siva was tall.
Really
tall compared to my five foot three inches. He had to be six foot four of tall, lean, perfect, man.

Sloane,
scolded my conscious.

I swallowed and climbed up on the bench so tha
t I could reach his head better.

He smiled at me, his perfect white teeth gleaming.

“I’m short,” I shrugged.

The soap suds gradually disappeared from his thick, black, hair.

“All done,” I smiled.

“Thanks,” he said.

I turned the shower off and opened the glass door. I grabbed a towel and tossed it to Siva and then grabbed one for myself.

“Aspirin, and antibacterial ointment?” I asked him.

He grinned and pointed to a closet door. I opened it up and found a little mini pharmacy inside. He had
a surplus supplies
of everything. I grabbed the bottle of aspirin and ointment. He had a cup beside his sink and I filled it with water and handed him two pills. He chugged them down and handed the cup back to me.

“Anything else Dr. Campbell?” he joked.

“Sit,” I said motioning to the toilet.

He put the lid down and sat eyeing me.

I squirted some of the ointment onto my finger and gently dabbed at his cuts.

“I don’t like seeing you hurt,” I whispered.

He jumped as if startled.

“Really?” he asked.

I shrugged my shoulders. “I worry about you. Even more so now,” I said motioning to his face as I put the cap back on the ointment.

“No one’s ever worried about me before,” he said and sounded like a lost little boy.

“I don’t believe that,” I said.

“It’s true,” he laughed cynically.

I put the ointment and medicine away and turned back to him.

“I think you can manage to get your own clothes on,” I said and started to shiver from the cold.

“Are you sure you don’t want to help me?” he grinned.

“I’m sure,” I said shaking with cold.

His face turned concerned. “You better get some dry clothes on before you get sick.”

“Yeah,” I said turning to leave. I looked back. “You’ll be okay?” I asked.

“I’m not as drunk as I looked,” he said softly.

“Really?” I asked with a quirked eyebrow.

“No,” he grinned. “I’m completely wasted but unlike most people I can hold my liquor.”

“Sure,” I said not sure if I believed him. Had it all been an act? I didn’t know.

I left his room and headed down the hall to mine. I stripped myself of my dripping wet clothes and pulled on a pair of lavender shorts and a white button down shirt that had once belonged to Dev before I claimed it as my own.

Exhausted I climbed in the bed and turned off the light.

Just as I was about to drift off asleep the door to my room opened.

Siva stood there in gray pajama pants and a white long sleeved shirt. His caramel skin and black hair looked striking against the white shirt.

“Siva?” I asked.