Authors: K. S.,Megan C. Smith
I held her at arm's length and rubbed her arms. "You can bet your sweet ass we do."
I spent the car ride home telling Jake all about our day after we'd left him and Josh. "It was so nice having the old Brooke back, even if she was just putting on a show."
His hand slid over to me and laced our fingers together.
When we got home, all I wanted to do was go for a quick run before settling down for bed, but Jake was in no way going to allow me to head out at that hour of the night, "Tomorrow morning. I promise I'll wake up early with you, and we'll run as long as you want."
I shook my head. "Brooke is right. I'm getting fat. I haven't told anyone this besides her and one of the models, but the other night I had to wear a size
two
because the zero wouldn't fit." I lifted my shirt up and pretended to shake my belly. "Do you see what these squatters are doing to my figure?"
Jake leaned back, a boisterous laugh ripping through him. "You're ridiculous. Your body is perfect. You get even more beautiful every day."
I shook my head and slipped out of my dress, rifling through my closet for my yoga pants and hoodie. "You won't be saying that when I've got two basketballs shoved underneath my shirt, and I can't see my toes. You realize that I have the potential to get so big I won't be able to properly manicure my nether regions."
Jake stepped into the closet with me and wrapped his arms around my hips. Leaning down, he kissed my lips. "I volunteer. I'll shave anything and everything you need shaved when you get fat." He winked at me, and I couldn't help but laugh at him.
I bent over and pulled on my socks and then my running shoes, and Jake slapped my ass.
"I see I'm not getting out of this?" he questioned as he reached for his workout gear.
"Not tonight. But I promise when we get home I'll repay you in wild-crazy-baby-momma sex." I stepped out of the closet and left him to change as I headed into the kitchen and began filling our water bottles.
The light breeze made for a perfect run as Jake and I discussed the babies the entire twelve miles. "You think your wish will come true, and we'll get a boy and a girl?" he asked.
I picked up the pace a bit. "I hope so, because I don't think I'm going to do this again. Two babies are enough for me. After I deliver, you can just have the nurses wheel me into the operating room for liposuction, a boob job, and a tummy tuck."
Jake's head turned fast, and he shot me a nasty look. "Now you're just talking out of your ass."
I grinned and winked up at him.
Back at the house I'd showered and was now lying comfortably in our giant bed, waiting for Jake to get off the phone so we could go to sleep. I could hear him talking with Josh, discussing work. We'd all been so preoccupied lately that all of our responsibilities had fallen to the wayside. I heard Jake respond.
"Amber will take care of it. You just need to focus on Brooke. If we need to, we can pull one of the girls from the shop to help out at the office." Their call lasted a few more minutes before he made his way to bed.
I snuggled up next to Jake, and he kissed me goodnight and turned out the light on the bedside table. "Brooke had a great time today. Josh is really glad the two of you got some one-on-one time."
He kissed the top of my head, and I mumbled, half asleep, "Me too."
The next morning I was awake with the sun, gearing up for my day of shopping with Brooke. Coffee was brewing in the pot when Jake emerged from the bedroom in nothing but a pair of boxer shorts.
"You still owe me wild-crazy-baby-momma sex."
I filled his coffee cup, added cream and sugar, then placed it down in front of him. I began to rub his bare back and admired his beautiful body. "Oh, I haven't forgotten."
I kissed his neck, and my free hand slipped into his boxers. "Tonight, this is all mine."
He sucked in a deep breath. "You better go before I take you right here in this kitchen."
I rushed off toward our bedroom and finished getting ready. Then I called Brooke, surprised when Josh answered the phone.
"Hey, Sav, she's still in bed. Yesterday was pretty exhausting for her. I don't think she is going to be up for a full day of shopping."
I racked my brain, doing my best to figure out how I could bring the shopping to her. "You think she'd be up for company?" I asked, hoping he'd say yes as a perfect plan popped into my head.
I could hear him talking softly to Brooke before he answered. "Yeah, company is fine. She just wants to stay close to home."
"Perfect. Tell her I'll see her soon."
I hung up the phone with Josh and dialed the local baby boutique that just so happened to be owned by an Hourglass client. "Stacy, this is Savannah Worthington. I need a favor."
Three hours later, I allowed Brooke to come out of her bedroom and escorted her into the living room of their house, which had been transformed into a replica of the baby boutique. Two sales consultants stood there ready to give us the rundown of everything they had to offer from bibs to baby beds.
Brooke sat down on the couch and looked over at me as I plopped down beside her.
"If you can't take the girl to the store, bring the store to the girl."
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Brooke
T
HE THUMPING AND
humming of the MRI machine was literally driving me insane, as the table I was lying on sent chills to my bones. It was as hard as concrete, making me even more uncomfortable than I had imagined I would be.
"Almost done, Brooke. You're doing great," the technician called through the speaker by my head. Silence descended on the room for a moment, before the grind of the table took over. Slowly, I was pulled from the narrow tube I'd been stuck inside and was greeted by the friendly woman. I'd forgotten her name. I'm not sure if that was pregnancy brain or the cancer. What if it had spread everywhere? I could feel my heart rate accelerate as the fear took hold of me.
"You okay?" she asked, genuine concern in her eyes as she rubbed my arm.
All I could do was nod my head, words failing me as they sat in a lump in my throat. She knew why I was there, so I hoped that would suffice. I re-dressed and walked out of the room to my husband's waiting arms.
Dark circles lay under his eyes as he dealt with this all internally, trying to balance his cancer-ridden pregnant wife and keeping his business afloat.
Dr. Rothchild was at the hospital waiting on the images and had asked us to remain on the grounds so he could discuss them with us. I supposed it had been a blessing in disguise, unsure how much longer I could wait to hear more bad news. Every passing minute was brutal, so I couldn't even imagine waiting days. After a quick lunch, where I mostly shoved my food around under Josh's scrutinizing glare, his phone rang.
"This is Josh." It must have been a new number for such a clean-cut greeting. That was usually the voice he used on business calls. I relaxed back into my seat, picking up a French fry and chewing on it to appease my worrisome husband. "We'll be right there."
Suddenly I wished I'd listened to the rest of the conversation, realizing that must have been the doctor.
"What did he say?" I asked, analyzing Josh's expression, but it was blank. It was clear the doctor had told him nothing. His only response was running his hand over his face, tugging the skin down with the force.
"Nothing. He is waiting till we get to his office." We both stood up and emptied our trays into the trash. As we walked down the hall hand in hand, I could feel my pulse thrumming through me, the beat drumming in my ears with each step closer to the conference room.
When we stepped inside, Dr. Rothchild was already waiting for us. Black and white pictures displayed on some light boxes on the wall behind him. Upon a closer inspection, I figured out they were my breasts. Well, this had just become officially awkward; never did I think I'd be having a conversation with two men, while my boobs were on display as artwork in the background.
A maniacal laugh bubbled out of me, growing louder by the second. I couldn't even control it at this point, tears soon joining the party as they streamed down my face. Both men looked at me like I'd officially lost it, and maybe I had. Finally composing myself, I took a few deep breaths. "Sorry, it's just that…" I couldn't voice why I'd just laughed like a banshee as I looked at both their concerned faces. Instead, I just waved a hand at the images on the wall and casted my eyed down in embarrassment.
"Alright then, so the images weren't much of a surprise. You have stage three breast cancer. What that means is the cancer has spread to both breast as well as the lymph nodes. We will need to work fast to fight this. I am recommending a double mastectomy as soon as possible, as well as chemo or radiation."
I felt my face contort to disgust. There was little known about radiation treatment while pregnant, and I just wasn't willing to take that risk. This was supposed to be the happiest time of our lives, and instead I was facing cancer.
I was so tired of being sad, and now I was just plain angry.
This isn't fair!
"Excuse me?" Dr. Rothchild asked, making me realize as both his and Josh's eyes looked at me that I had spoken out loud.
Figuring I had already blurted out my last thought, I unleashed. "This isn't fair!" I pushed out of the chair and shoved it back, the wheels carrying it until it bounced off the wall with a thud. "How is it this bad, this fast? I don't understand. There is
no
family history of breast cancer, I called my mom and checked. I get my yearly doctor appointments and breast exams. I am about to be a mother. How am I supposed to feed my baby with no breast? What is my husband supposed to tell my son or daughter if I'm gone?" Tears trickled down one by one as both men continued to watch me. Seriously, a man with a straight jacket was bound to come in soon.
"Mrs. Worthington, I can assure you we will fight this. You have an amazing support team, and remarkable women such as yourself beat this all the time."
"But they lose the fight too." I said very matter-of-factly.
"Sadly they do, but you can't lose hope, Brooke. Let's reconvene after you've had a few days to process this all."
Josh stood up beside me, taking my hand and holding on to it so tightly I thought I was losing circulation. We walked out in silence; it seemed to be the new trend in our lives.
The car was only filled with the sound of the radio as I stared out the window. At each passing car or person, I would peer inside and try to figure out their lives. Decide if they were happy or sad. The vibration of my phone inside my purse buzzed against my leg. After digging in my bag a moment, I tilted the screen so that I could see the caller. Savannah. Ugh, she'd be wondering how the doctor appointment went.
I slid the button to answer the call. "Hey, how is your day going?" I prayed she'd have some saga tale to break the depression taking hold. Anything to brighten my day or change my train of thought. Savannah and Josh deserved so much better. Especially after bringing the boutique to me the other day and helping me get excited for this baby.
"You answered. Hey," Savannah stammered out.
I had that coming; I ignored a lot of calls these days.
"I'm good, getting bigger by the day. How about you?"
I could hear the hesitation in her voice; she knew it was a dangerous line to walk with me. Just one toe out of line, and I'd inevitably go off and hang up.
"You know… same old. My belly is getting bigger too, and he or she is moving around like crazy lately."
"So it wasn't good?" she choked out.
I shook my head as tears welled up in my eyes. My God, they had to be almost out of tears by now. I felt cried out.
"Well, I won't need bras anymore, so you'll have to hit up the semi-annual sale solo this year, and I have a like sixty-percent survival rate since I'm pregnant, as long as I do the radiation or chemo."
"Brooke."
I knew she was crying from the sound of her voice. I looked at Josh and mouthed the word Jake; she needed him to hold her up. What kind of screwed-up pyramid was this? I needed Savannah, Josh, and Jake. Savannah needed Jake, and so Jake needed Josh. But Josh needed Jake. And in the end, they all needed me. That's not even mixing in the three babies involved in the diabolical mess.