Hold Me (20 page)

“Everyone is friendly. There’s a really great group of women,” Destiny said. “I’d be happy to introduce you, if you’d like. I’ve gone to lunch with them a few times already. It’s a fun way to meet people and find out the real scoop.”

Cassidy grinned. “I do love small-town gossip. It’s a flaw, but one I can live with.”

Before Destiny could respond, her cell phone rang. She pulled it out of her cargo pants pocket and glanced at the screen. The area code was local, but the number unfamiliar.

“Hello?”

“Destiny?”

“Yes.”

“Hi, I’m Dakota Andersson. I run End Zone. I’m sure it’s nothing, but Starr never showed up this morning, and no one called to let us know she was staying home sick. I wanted to follow up with you and make sure she was all right.”

There was a lot of information in those few sentences. That the camp took its responsibilities seriously. That they made sure the kids were where they were supposed to be. And that Starr was missing.

Destiny went cold all over. “She’s not sick,” she said slowly. “Not that I’m aware of. We talked this morning. She said she was getting a ride to camp with Abby. She was very clear about that. I know because I know Abby and like her. I’ve met her mom and everything.”

On the other end of the call, Dakota paused. “She’s not here. We’ve checked twice. Starr never arrived.”

There was an edge to panic. A sharpness. Destiny had never felt it before. Not like this. Not with a combination of horror and fear. Anything could have happened. Something had. But what? Where was Starr?

“How can we help?” Dakota asked, obviously expecting Destiny to take the lead. To handle the situation.

In the back of her mind she was aware that given her job description she was possibly the best person to find a missing teenager. But honest to God, she didn’t know where to start. She felt hot and cold and knew she was seconds from throwing up.

The office door opened, and Kipling stepped inside. Destiny lunged for him, grabbing his arm and squeezing hard.

“Starr’s missing,” she said, her throat tight as her heart pounded in her chest. “She never showed up to camp.”

Kipling grabbed her phone and identified himself. He spoke calmly but quickly. When he hung up, he handed back the phone and took her hand.

“You have my cell number,” he told Cassidy. “Phone me if you hear anything.”

“I will.”

He turned to Destiny. “Starr has a cell phone, right? Call her.”

With trembling fingers, Destiny did. “It went straight to voice mail.”

Then he was pulling Destiny out the door, toward his truck.

“Where are we going?” she asked. “I don’t know where to start. She hasn’t been here very long. I thought she was fine. What if something awful happened? What if we can’t find her?”

“We’ll find her. It hasn’t been that long. She can’t have gotten that far. Call the mom. See if she took Starr up to camp. We’ll go by the house to make sure she’s not there, then go up the mountain and talk to her friends.”

Right. A good place to start. Destiny got into the truck and fastened her seat belt. After scrolling through her contact list, difficult to do with her hands shaking, she pushed the talk button and waited for the call to connect to Abby’s mom, Liz. Two minutes later she had her answer.

“Starr lied.”

The words weren’t real. At least they didn’t feel real. They couldn’t be. How could Starr have done this? Lied to Destiny about being taken to camp, then disappeared? How could her sister be gone?

They arrived at the house and hurried inside. Starr wasn’t there. Destiny followed Kipling back to his Jeep. Her eyes burned as the fear thickened. She could barely think, barely breathe.

“I don’t know her well enough,” she said, fighting tears. “It’s only been a few weeks. I should have tried harder. I was busy with my job and other stuff. I left her alone too long. I wasn’t there for her.”

Kipling kept his gaze forward as he drove up the mountain. “How long have you known your sister?”

“Six weeks.”

“Not long enough to screw her up. Destiny, this isn’t your fault.”

“I’m responsible for her. There’s no one else to blame.”

“How about all the stuff that happened before she moved in with you?”

She thought about the call from their shared father, celebrating a birthday that wasn’t Starr’s. And the boarding school her sister didn’t seem all that excited to return to. And her longing to get involved with music, while Destiny resisted as best she could.

“You’re saying there’s plenty of blame to go around,” she whispered. “Fine. I’ll have that conversation when we find her. But right now all that matters is getting her back.”

They arrived at the camp in record time. Kipling had barely slowed before Destiny jumped out and headed for the main office.

Dakota Andersson was waiting for her with two of Starr’s friends. Both girls looked scared.

“I’m sorry,” Abby said, tears filling her eyes. “She said she wanted to go to Nashville. She’s taking the bus. We both gave her money.”

Dakota put her hand on the girl’s shoulder. “I’ve already called the sheriff’s office. They’re sending a patrol car to the bus station. Small towns have some advantages. Only one bus has gone out this morning. I’m expecting they’ll find her waiting at the station.”

Destiny felt the ground shift beneath her feet. “Nashville?” Because Starr was running away. That was how bad things were. She’d taken in her sister, had agreed to be her guardian and less than two months later, Starr would rather take her chances on the streets than live with Destiny.

How had everything gone so wrong so fast?

* * *

D
ESTINY
DIDN
’
T
KNOW
if she should scream, cry or take up drinking. She could make a case for any of those actions, along with several others.

Dakota’s prediction had been right. Starr had been found on a bench in the bus depot. She’d missed the earlier Greyhound that went to Los Angeles and was instead heading to San Francisco. From there, she’d told the deputy who’d found her, she was planning on taking a plane to Nashville.

She’d had five hundred dollars in cash, a small suitcase and her guitar. Destiny couldn’t get over the terrifying thought of an innocent fifteen-year-old girl on her own in the world.

Kipling had driven them both home and left them to work it out. He’d promised to drop by later, to check on them. Destiny had wanted to beg him to stay—she didn’t know what on earth she was supposed to do or say. But she’d let him go and now had to deal with the aftermath herself.

She and Starr sat across from each other in their small living room and tried to figure out what to say. She supposed the good news was that nothing awful had happened. Maybe they’d both learned a cheap lesson. She just wasn’t sure what it was.

She studied her sister. Starr stared at her hands or the floor. Her red hair hung down, covering her face. Or maybe keeping the world at bay, Destiny thought.

The room was quiet. Somewhere a clock ticked. A car drove by. Aside from that, there was nothing. Not even the sound of their breathing.

Indecision pulled at her. What was she supposed to say? How did she make this right? She supposed the bigger issue was she hadn’t known there was a problem—certainly not one that warranted running away.

She drew in a breath. “Starr, I—”

Her sister’s head snapped up. Her green eyes narrowed. “Yeah, I lied. Get over it. You would have done the same if you were me. What was I supposed to do? Just wait for you to get tired of me? I’m not going back to that boarding school. You can’t make me.”

So much anger. So much energy. And so much pain. Destiny felt her heart flinch as she realized how Starr had been suffering. And she’d never guessed.

“You think I don’t know,” her sister continued, coming to her feet. Her hands were tight fists at her sides. “I know. It’s not hard to figure out. Nobody wants me. Not you, not my dad.” Tears spilled from her eyes. “He doesn’t even know when it’s my birthday. I’m his kid. How come he doesn’t know that?”

Destiny stood and crossed to her. She tried to pull Starr close, but her sister shrugged away.

“Don’t pretend you care now,” the teen snapped.

Destiny took a step back. “I care. I took you in. I brought you here. I thought we were doing well together.”

“Oh, sure. It’s great. You’re counting the days until school starts and you can get rid of me. We talked about your job before. About how it was better for me to go back to boarding school. Because you can’t wait to get rid of me.”

While that wasn’t true, Destiny had been thinking she would only have Starr in the summers. “My work,” she began, only to realize that wasn’t the point. “Can we talk?” she asked. “Just sit and talk?”

Starr wiped away her tears and sank back onto the sofa. Destiny took the chair opposite and tried to figure out what to say.

“You scared me,” she began, thinking it was the truth. “When Dakota called from camp and said you’d never arrived, I was so afraid of what had happened.”

“I didn’t think they’d call,” Starr grumbled.

“So you’d have all day to get away? And then what? Didn’t you think I’d totally freak out?”

Her sister shrugged.

“Starr, you have to know I care about you.”

“Do you?” the teen asked. “Do you really? Can you honestly say you were thrilled when you got that call from the lawyer? Because you’d just been sitting here thinking if only you had some kid sister you’d never met, then your life would be perfect?”

“I was surprised, but I didn’t hesitate. I wanted you to come live here.”

“Whatever. I don’t believe you. You don’t care about anything, ever. You’re like a robot. You never get mad, you never get happy. You’re the same all the time. Regular people don’t act like that.”

People who never wanted to deal with the mess of highs and lows did, Destiny thought grimly. Because she knew the price of feeling too much. Only until right now, she’d never considered that there was a price to trying not to feel anything. The price of Starr not knowing she belonged.

“I’m sorry you think I don’t care,” she said quietly. “I do. I care a lot.”

Her sister’s mouth pulled into a straight line. Disbelief radiated from her. “Sure you do.”

Irritation battled with concern and started to win. “You’re going to ignore the truth because it’s not what you want to hear,” Destiny snapped. “Just like you were going to run away without thinking about the consequences. You’re fifteen. You’re not ready to be on your own. Life is complicated. You can’t hide from your problems. They follow you wherever you go.”

“You should have let me figure that out on my own. That would have made it easy for you, and isn’t that what matters?”

“You’re not making any sense.”

“You know what doesn’t make sense?” Starr demanded, glaring at her. “You. You don’t make sense. You tell me not to run away, but you’re doing it every day. You run away from your talent, from who you are. I’ve heard you sing, Destiny, and you’re better than all of us. But you won’t perform. You won’t even admit that you have any ability. What’s up with that? I want to write songs and sing and have music in every part of my life. You want to hide away from it.”

“This isn’t about music,” Destiny told her. She could feel her sister’s pain, her confusion, and didn’t know what to do about it. Kipling had been right. Starr had been delivered to her a nearly grown person. Whatever was going on, Destiny was only part of the problem. But she had to be all-in for the solution. “It’s about us.”

“There’s no
us
,” Starr snapped.

“I’d like there to be. You’re my sister, and I want us to be a family.”

“Until school starts. Then you want me to go to boarding school. Well, I’m not. Not ever. And you can’t make me. I’ll just run away and live on the streets until I’m old enough to get my trust fund money. I can do it, too. I can go to where you can’t find me.”

Not if today was any indication, Destiny thought with irritation. Starr was fifteen and didn’t know how to take care of herself, let alone survive on the streets. What if she
had
gotten on the bus and had disappeared? A thousand horrible things could have happened to her.

Images flashed through her brain, each more awful than the one before. Starr could have been beaten or raped. She could have been terrorized by some crazy person. Taken drugs, gotten sick. She could have been hurt and suffered, and she could have died.

Unexpected tears filled Destiny’s eyes. Fear returned and with it determination.

“No,” she said loudly, then repeated the word again. “No. You’re not running away. I will not lose you. Do you hear me? I don’t care what it takes, but by God we are going to make this work. I’m not giving up on you, and I’m not giving up on us. You’re my sister. You’re my family. Our parents are totally screwed up, and that means we’re messed up, too. But so what? We have each other.”

Starr stared at her. Color stained her cheeks and for a second, there was hope in her eyes. Then it bled away.