His to Bear (10 page)

She turned, leaning her back against the wall and sliding down to sit on the

floor. She pulled her knees to her chest and let the tears come. It was too much. She

should have kept the past firmly locked away. Instead, it had all come spilling out,

leaving her feeling even more exposed and broken. She’d lost her family, all of them.

Some to death and some because it was the only way to keep them safe. Either way,

she’d been left alone when all she’d ever known was the chaos and love of a big

family.

Uncle Emmett had taken her in and offered her his guidance and protection, but

he’d never shown her love. He’d never truly known what a young girl craved. There’d

been no softness to him, no gentleness in dealing with her. Disobedience had been met

with swift punishment. Laughter silenced with a harsh look and verbal reminder of

who she was and what she represented—the future of their pack, of their very species.

So she’d done her best to follow every order to perfection, to complete every task set

to her with accuracy as well as efficiency.

She’d sought to please, and in the end, Uncle Emmett had died for her. He’d

never given her a hug or a kiss. Kind words had been a thing of the past. But in the

end, he’d given the greatest gift of all to ensure her safety. His life.

The sobs surprised her as they burst from her throat, her chest aching with them

as the tears poured like rain. So much death. For what? What was it the one who

betrayed them sought to prove or gain? She’d never hear her papa’s booming laugh

again. Never see her mama’s warm smile. Her youngest sister, Saphira, just a baby at

the time. Jaeda would never see the woman Saphira could have been. Lost. Murdered.

Betrayed. While she’d hidden in the den giggling, blood had been shed on the dirt just

above her head.

She sensed Holt long before she heard the door and felt him lift her from the

floor. He wrapped her in his arms and carried her to the bed, sitting down with her and

holding her snugly against him. He crooned and stroked, asking questions as her tears

eased and her breathing relaxed. Word by word she let it all spill out. Exposing every

dark secret and cherished memory to this man she’d chosen, this man she knew

someday she would love far more than any other she’d lost. She let him see every part

of her until there was nothing left to tell. His touch soothed the storm, his rain of

kisses easing the pain. Then he whispered to her, not words of love. It was too early

for those, and she knew it. Instead, they were words of honor, of trust and loyalty, a

commitment to watch over and protect her always.

“Go to sleep, darling. I’ve got you. Nothing will hurt you tonight, not while

you’re in my arms. Rest and let me hold you. Just let me hold you and chase all the

bad away.”

It sounded like paradise to her, and with a gentle sigh, she gave in and let

slumber pull her deep.

* * * *

At some point, Holt must have fallen asleep with Jaeda. He awoke to the

realization that his shirt was gone and his mate was rubbing against the smattering of

hair on his chest. He took quick inventory, not sure who’d discarded his shirt just

grateful his jeans were still on and buttoned. His little bear was fully clothed. He felt the brush of her shirt against his side, the rub of her denim-clad thigh along his own.

She’d ripped his heart out last night when he’d come looking for her. Such

sorrow and pain, and as her story had tumbled from her lips, he’d wanted to go back

in time and make it all right for her. To kill those who had taken from her. She was an

incredible woman. Young, yes, and that still gave him a bit of pause. But so fierce and

brave to have gone through all she had to still be in her early twenties. He’d known he

would have to claim her once he’d heard all Laramie had to say. Not only because

she’d marked him, but because he’d realized at some point, he’d already started

thinking of her as his. Maybe it was in response to her always referring to him as hers.

Her mate. Her Holt. It was actually sexy.

Last night, he’d held her in his arms, and with each word she’d spoken, she’d

wrapped around his heart. He’d never leave her. He needed to stop questioning

everything, stop searching for all the reasons it was wrong to accept her. Instead, he

needed to realize what a huge gift he’d been given. Out of all the men here she could

have chosen, she’d looked to him. Though bears were undeniably different than cats,

Holt knew her choice meant everything. They belonged to one another, and whether

he accepted her now or a week from now, the outcome was inevitable. They would be

together. He wouldn’t let her go anymore than she would him. Whether from a bite or

the gentle rub of a bear, mates were bonded in ways their human counterparts could

never understand unless they were chosen by a shifter.

“Good morning, darling,” he rumbled as Jaeda finally peeked up at him.

“Morning.” Her voice was whisper soft and muffled by the way she kept her

head buried in his chest.

“Feeling okay? Headache?” He’d seen what a crying jag could do to a woman

during the time his best friend Kenzie had been going through her mating.

“I’m fine.” A whisper again, this one laced with uncertainty.

He didn’t like the sound of it.

“Come here,” he rasped, tugging at her until she lifted her head to him.

He took her lips with his. He meant to be gentle, a soft kiss to start the day, but

the taste of her sent all good intentions scattering. He nipped and sucked at the bottom curve until she parted them with a gasp. He took full advantage, licking his tongue

inside and stroking wantonly against hers. He lost himself in her. The taste and smell

of her skin surrounding him. He felt burned by her, possessed and consumed, and he

only wanted more.

When he finally came to his senses, his lungs burning with the need for breath,

his hands were already cupping her ass, helping her grind her heated pussy over his

throbbing shaft. God, he wanted her with a desire that had his blood on fire. It would

take little effort to strip them both and thrust home, to take what he wanted and she

was so eager to give. Instead, he forced his hands to soften before easing her back off

his aching dick and breaking their kiss.

He immediately saw her expression change. Doubt and worry filled a gaze that

had so recently been swimming with lust and desire. He refused to let it sway him,

though. Soon, they’d consummate their bond, but not just yet.

He ran his thumb over her plumped bottom lip, still wet from their kiss.

“You’re so beautiful,” he murmured, turning his hand so the backs of his fingers

could glide over the silk of her cheek. “So soft and warm. You make me ache.”

“I could ease you,” she offered, her glance falling to the bulge of his erection,

leaving no confusion over what she was referring to.

“Soon,” he vowed. “Not yet. I want to hold you, to touch you, to know every

inch of you inside and out.” He met her gaze. “I want you to do the same with me.”

“I’d like that,” she agreed.

“Don’t confuse my desire to delay our pleasure with not wanting it, not wanting

you. I do, very much. You can see how hard you make me. You’ve felt it more than

once. Make no mistake, Jaeda. I will take you, claim you and fuck you until neither of

us can dare to think of anything outside the feel of each other.”

Her eyes lit up, her breath coming in quick pants. He enjoyed the rise and fall of

her breasts, the hard tips begging for his touch. He took a deep breath of his own and

denied them both, knowing it would only make it all the sweeter when they did give

in to the fire burning between them.

“Later, darling. We’ll get to that later. First, I want to take you outside. Enjoy

the fresh air and sunshine. We’ll grab some breakfast and head out for the morning.

Just the two of us.”

“Is that safe?”

He knew who she was thinking of. “Koby won’t bother us. I’ll make sure of it,”

he promised.

“Then we’ll come back here and take care of this?” Her fingers brushed his

swollen shaft, making him grit his teeth as his dick seemed to throb at the promise in

her touch.

He let out a shaky laugh. “Definitely.”

Damn her, she perked right up at that as if she were eager to get her hands on his

cock. She couldn’t possibly be more eager than he was. Maybe he should just say

screw it and toss her down, now. They were both obviously ready and more than

willing.

“I want to tell you about myself,” he finally said. “You shared so much with me

last night. I want to return the favor, to let you know more about me.”

She nodded. “Will you tell me about your kitten?”

He almost groaned at that and thought again how he’d like to slap Finn upside

the head for his slip in front of Jaeda. It was inevitable, though. He couldn’t tell her about himself without mentioning the woman he’d once fancied himself in love with,

the woman he still thought of as his best friend.

“She’s not my kitten,” he told her again. “But I will tell you all about Kenzie.

She’s my friend, my best friend, and she had a hell of a time with her mate the last

time I was here at the Holloways. It’s through her mate that I met the brothers, and

that meeting’s what led to me being here, now.”

“Then I’ll like her,” Jaeda decided with a firm nod. “She needs to understand

that she only gets one mate. Bears don’t share. She can have her mate, but you’re

mine. I won’t ever share you.”

Holt did laugh then. “I assure you, Kenzie and her mate have no intention of

sharing, either. I’m all yours.”

“Good. I’ll walk with you. I want to learn everything there is to know about you.

You’re mine, now, and it’s my responsibility to see to all your needs. Physical as well

as emotional. To do that I need to know what’s in your heart.”

His dick flexed as he shifted when she mentioned physical. Christ, being noble

was going to kill him, slowly and painfully. Then he met her gaze again, taking in the

eagerness and trust there. He owed her no less. She might not realize it, but she

deserved a man who would treasure her, one who would take the time to know her,

first. A man who would romance and seduce, not just claim and take. He was

determined to be that man for her. Always.

“Why don’t you take a shower while I go grab us some breakfast. Then I’ll take

one before we head out.”

“Okay!” She bounded from the bed and headed toward the bathroom with a hop

in her step. He saw the gentle sway of her hips, the bounce of her rounded ass, and

almost moaned as his balls drew tighter, sending an ache through him.

“Woo her,” he muttered to himself as he headed out the door, snagging his shirt

and jerking it over his head as he moved. “You’ll fucking woo her if it kills you.”

He reached down to adjust his dick and clenched his teeth. At the moment, it just

might.

Chapter Eight

“So tell me about your life, my Holt,” Jaeda insisted when they’d walked a ways

from the main house and only woods surrounded them.

She continued to look cautiously around, not eager to meet up with Koby despite

Holt’s assurance everything would be okay. She wondered if her mate understood just

how far she’d go to protect him. She had no qualms about shifting and spilling blood

if it was required. There was nothing she wouldn’t do to protect her Holt.

“Normal human upbringing,” Holt said. “Mom and dad have been married since

they were barely in their twenties. I have two younger brothers and a younger sister.”

“So you’re the oldest in your family?”

He nodded. “I’m thirty-five. Joined the Marines right out of high school. It was

all I ever wanted to do.” He gave her a serious look, his gaze probing as if seeking

some type of reaction from her.

“How did the reality compare to the expectation? Being a Marine?” Was that his

concern? That she might take exception to what he’d done while serving in the

military?

The corners of his mouth tugged up in a brief grin. “Met the best people there

and built a new family among them.”

“This is the shifter pride you’ve been with? They’re Marines, too?”

“Most of them. The core group of us, at least. We’ve been through hell together.

We all left within a year of each other. Kenzie and I were bouncing around together,

trying to figure out what to do as civilians, when one of our group called in an SOS.

We loaded up and left. Never looked back.”

“What about your family? Do you still see them?”

“I do, though probably not as often as they’d like. It’s hard to explain. I love

them, would do anything in the world for them. But it’s hard to slip back into that

mold they have for me, especially with all I know now. I call…try to make the

occasional visit home. It’s enough for now. My siblings keep them busy with

grandkids.”

“What about you?” she asked, holding her breath as she waited.

“Do I have kids?” he asked, and she nodded. “No, but I’d like them in the future.

You?”

She felt some of the tension leave her. “I’ve always hoped for a big family. It’s

my duty to bear children, to see to the continuation of our species. More so now than

ever before.”

“Children should never be a duty,” Holt objected. “If and when we have them,