His Darkest Salvation (28 page)

“You boys hungry?” Cracker nodded toward the galley. “There’s plenty of food back there.”

Declan stretched out his long legs and smiled. “Cool, I’m fucking starved. But the real question, my friend, is do we have a nice dark ale? I’m thirsty as all hell.”

Jaden rose and walked past Julian, her head turned to the other side. She was doing everything in her power to ignore him. He knew the truth. He felt the pull as much as she did.

He groaned, slid deeper into the soft leather, and closed his eyes hoping that sleep would come. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d actually slept.

Down below, sleep brought nightmares, the kind that you could feel, the kind that left you bloody and banged up when you awoke.

“A bitch, isn’t it?”

He ignored Declan.

“You asleep?”

Julian exhaled loudly.

“Didn’t think so.”

“What is it that you want?” he asked roughly, his eyes still closed, though he knew any thought of sleep was nothing more than a far-fetched dream.

“I want . . .” Declan’s voice trailed off, and Julian cracked an eye open. He was astounded at the raw display of emotion that blanketed the sorcerer’s face. It was etched into the depths of his eyes.

Declan turned to him, and, in an instant, it vanished, leaving nothing but the cold, calculating man he’d become in its place.

“I want peace,” he said simply, “and I’ll get it.” He turned away, his face half-hidden as he gazed out the window. Julian saw his long fingers tremble as the sorcerer grimaced. “The moment I rip Cormac’s heart from his body, that’s when I’ll have it.”

Julian said nothing. He closed his eyes once more. For the sorcerer’s sake, Julian hoped like hell Declan would be able to find his peace, that revenge would fuel his road to recovery.

His gut told him otherwise. He had a feeling that even when it was over, it would never end.

Chapter 20

T
hey landed in Canada in the middle of a snowstorm. It was mid-December and to be expected, but after spending the last nine months in either the hot jungles of Belize or the burning fires of hell, the cold and snow were not really things Julian was excited to experience.

A blast of frigid air greeted him as he exited the plane and kept his head low, trudging through slippery snow as he followed Cracker and the others. Jaden was still avoiding him and kept close to Nico. Their whispered words had ticked him off the entire trip. He’d pretended sleep but in reality nearly lost the battle to smash his fist into Nico’s cranium.

The thought alone brought a half smile to his face.

The wind was cutting, lashing at his skin with snowflakes that felt like bullets. His shoulders were wound so tight, he winced in pain as he stopped in front of a large SUV.

The door flew open, and he stepped back as a set of lean legs encased in skintight jeans and tucked into boots—which were totally inappropriate for the weather—slid from the truck. The small, trim woman who stared up at him was something fierce to behold, her long, amber waves billowing around her delicate face. Her pale skin was a dramatic contrast to the crimson shade of her lips, and a glimpse of fangs could be seen as she smiled.

She squared her shoulders and nodded to him as her focus shifted to the man at his side.

Julian glanced at Declan, then slipped past Ana before disappearing into the truck. He slid into the far corner, his eyes drawn to the driver. He didn’t recognize him, but the smell of otherworld clung to his frame.

Cracker slid into the passenger seat up front, and Julian watched in silence as Jaden climbed in. Her dark eyes caught his, and for that one brief moment, the craziness inside him subsided, like the layers of noise and pain had suddenly been peeled back.

She paused in the doorway, her body still, though he could see her pulse beating fast against the crook of her neck. He wasn’t aware of anything but Jaden, her long hair, the small tilt of her nose, and the generous curve to her lips. Her dark eyes glistened eerily in the late-afternoon gloom, and he focused on one solitary snowflake that lay against her cheek.

It was perfect, the design brilliantly displayed against her golden flesh, and he envisioned his tongue licking it from her. The taste and smell of Jaden invaded his nostrils, and they flared as his heart sped up, and his breaths came in rapid spurts.

Slowly, her hand reached for her face, and she wiped away the snowflake, as if she knew exactly what he was thinking. Her eyes widened, ever so slightly, and she looked away, cleared her throat.

“Jaden, I’m freezing my ass off, so it’d be great if you could get that pretty butt of yours moving.” Declan’s sarcastic voice ruined the moment, and Julian looked away as she slid into the seat behind him, Nico and Finn following suit.

Ana stepped in and sat next to him. “Damn, Julian, if your board of directors could see you now, they’d be crapping their pants for sure.”

Julian glanced at Ana but remained silent.

He noticed the tense set to Declan’s lips as he closed the door and sat on the other side of the vampire.

“Seriously,” she murmured, “as much as I’m sure it totally sucked hanging in the demon realm, you gotta admit . . .”

“Admit?”

“It’s made you one hell of a badass, and you weren’t exactly pleasant before.”

“More like asshole.” Jaden’s whisper surrounded him, and he saw Ana smile.

“Is Father running Blue Heaven?” he asked suddenly, his thoughts turning to the company that up until several months ago, had meant everything to him. Under his care, Blue Heaven Industries had tripled in growth. It was the premiere manufacturer of communication devices in the world, and he’d brokered several huge contracts with the military.

“Your father has made sure that the family business stays afloat. No worries. When this is all over, you can return to your old life.”

Ana’s words sank in, and he settled back into the seat, his eyes drawn to the window and out at the swirling snow. The wind continued to howl, pushing the flakes into a chaotic dance of white. It looked as confusing and frenetic as his life. Return to his old life?

What a fucking joke.

Julian closed his eyes and rested his head against the seat. It would never happen. He was forever changed, and he knew it wasn’t for the better. He was ruined, damaged beyond repair, with a hole inside him that even if he was able to patch, would never fully heal. How could it?

Bleakness sat heavy in his chest, and he felt the burn of his scars bleed through.

“Where are we?” he murmured, caring enough for the first time to ask.

“A few hours north of Toronto. Jaxon has set up his new headquarters near a town called Gravenhurst. It’s a vacation hot spot for the Canucks in the summer. Lots of water, cottages, money.”

“Lots of fucking snow,” Declan observed dryly, and Julian felt a smile tug at his lips. The Irishman was bang on.

The rest of the ride continued in silence, all of them deep into their own thoughts. Twenty minutes later, they turned off of the main highway, and the truck plowed through a snow-covered road that was barely more than a path.

They passed several homes, all of them expensive, large. Some were lit up with colorful display of lights in honor of the impending Christian holiday, most were empty. Julian sat straighter in his seat and gazed ahead, his eyes fixed on the large structure that could barely be seen over the thick stand of trees that blanketed the entire area.

They were weaving along a twisted lane, the elevation dropping, and he assumed they were headed toward a large body of water. He could smell it in the air, the cool crispness of ice. Though the wind continued to howl and throw snow at them, making visibility nearly impossible, the driver had no problem navigating his way through. He was obviously familiar with the area.

A few minutes, later the truck slid to a slow crawl as they made a left and approached a massive gate. They came to a full stop, and he watched with interest as they were approached by two guards.

The driver’s window slid open and after a few words were exchanged, the gate retreated, and they were able to drive through. They took a sharp turn to the right, and several moments later, the trees thinned until they disappeared, and a large home came into view.

It was massive, and he saw several smaller buildings scattered on either side. Julian was impressed. Jaxon had managed to make his new headquarters both a home and a state-of-the-art base of operations.

They pulled in front of the main house, and, as he slid from the interior of the truck, he tried to ignore the nervous energy that pulled at his gut. He blew out a harsh breath, and was startled when he felt Jaden at his side.

“Guess it’s been a while since you saw your family,” she said simply, her voice husky and low.

She looked up at him, her dark eyes like pools of black licorice, and his hand moved before he even knew what he was doing. She flinched when his palm touched her cheek, and as her energy mixed with his, the biting wind and driving snow disappeared, and there was nothing but the two of them.

He stared down at her, hoping the intense need he felt wasn’t reflected in his eyes. He wasn’t used to this, these feelings of want. They confused the crap out of him.

“It’s Jaxon.” Nico’s rough voice cut through whatever the hell it was that held him in his grip, and his hand fell away as he turned from Jaden and glanced up at the house.

Several silhouettes could be seen, their dark outlines eerie shadows against the light from within the house. The two tall ones in front were his brothers. This he knew, yet, there was nothing inside him. No joy. No anticipation. Just . . .
nothing.

Julian frowned as he followed the rest of the group up the stairs until he was inches from Jaxon and Jagger. The two brothers stood shoulder to shoulder, united, linked on a level he couldn’t understand anymore.

Jagger smiled, a wide sweeping grin that transformed his handsome face into that of the young boy Julian remembered. He was enveloped in an embrace that was rough, genuine, and still he felt nothing.

“Christ, it’s good to see you again,” Jagger whispered into his ear before letting go. The youngest Castille laughed at him as he pulled away. “Damn, Julian, don’t be so serious.”

Julian arched an eyebrow, his expression wooden. “Well, Armageddon is pretty fucking serious, don’t you think?” He ignored Jagger and turned to Jaxon, nodding curtly before he spoke. “I hear you have intel. Time’s running out, so I suggest you get us up to speed.”

His abrupt manner, the harshness of his words, clearly shocked his brothers, yet he didn’t give a shit. He had no need for hugs and well-wishes or deep conversations where he bared his soul.

He looked away from them, frustrated and pissed off. A blond woman caught his eye, her smile was tremulous, but it was the child at her side, staring up at him, that stopped him cold.

He knew instantly who it was: Logan. Jaxon and Libby’s son.

The dark eyes looked at him with no fear, and he broke from his mother, ignoring her protest. Julian felt a spark of admiration for the child. The kid had spunk, he had to give him that. The youngster stopped in front of him, his dark eyes surrounded by the Castille eyebrows and high cheekbones.

His hair was longish, dark waves that caressed baby-soft skin.

Julian sensed the energy that surrounded the boy, and it was surprisingly strong. His signatures were not wholly shifter. There was something else. Something powerful. Magick.

Julian frowned.

The little hand reached for him but hesitated in the air, inches from his own. Julian was aware of all eyes upon him. He knew that Jaden was close, inches from his back, and that Declan and Ana stood several feet away.

For a second, he nearly turned. The need to disappear was overwhelming, and he thought how easy it would be to lose himself in the cold and snow that surrounded the compound. How easy it would be to let his soul slowly break apart until there was nothing but darkness inside him.

He could give in, say fuck it, and let whatever happened lead him to wherever the hell that road would take him.

And yet as he gazed down upon the chubby cheeks of the small boy in front of him, he felt a glimmer of hope. A touch of heat inside him that was gone just as fast.

The little boy’s hand moved, and Julian did nothing to stop him from clasping his large index finger. The child pulled at him gently.

“Come on,” he said simply, his face breaking out into a shy smile. “I want to show you my doggie.”

Julian let the boy lead him forward, and he nodded to Libby as he passed her.

“Hey,” she said softly, the merest whisper of a smile gracing her face.

His throat felt tight, and he kept silent as he walked into the house, very much aware that everyone was still watching him. It made him uncomfortable, the attention.

“Well, holy Christ, what about me? My ass was burned just as bad if not worse down there, ya know. A little tender lovin’ would be much appreciated.” Declan’s sarcastic comment followed him inside.

Julian cracked a genuine smile and shook his head.