A shiver raced up Tucker’s spine and he opened his eyes. Jesus, Micah was so tight. There was no way this was going to last. Tucker should take charge but all he could do was lay there and feel as Micah began to fuck him in a slow, steady pace.
Grasping Micah’s hips, Tucker held on and watched the slim body ride him. The tight grip of Micah’s body had Tucker gasping for breath in no time. “Come on, baby.” Tucker grabbed Micah’s cock and tightened his hand, letting Micah push up into it then sink back down on his cock.
“
Dios mio.
” Micah hurried his pace. His head dropped back and a ragged groan tore from his throat seconds before hot spunk spilled over Tucker’s hand and on his stomach.
That was all it took. Tucker thrust up, pulled Micah down and came. Tucker’s whole body shook as Micah collapsed on top of him.
After several seconds, Tucker wrapped his arms around the slim back and stared up at the ceiling, listening to their panting breaths. Running his hand through Micah’s hair, Tucker kissed Micah’s forehead. It was hot but Tucker would rather gouge his own eyes out than move the precious weight on top of him.
Feeling like his bones had melted, Tucker lay there until Micah’s breath evened out.
Asleep.
Good, Micah needed it.
Tucker didn’t want to sleep. As long as he could, he was going to hang on to this feeling. Tomorrow was only going to bring questions he couldn’t answer. He knew without a doubt Micah loved him, but what the hell could they do about it?
Chapter Nine
Granddad was dead and it didn’t seem real. Tucker watched with a heavy heart as the coffin was lowered into the ground. Maybe he’d deluded himself into thinking that his grandfather would live forever, he didn’t know, but he felt guilty for not spending more time with him. Tucker couldn’t let this happen with the rest of his family. No matter what, he wasn’t staying away so long again. Shaking himself out of his daze, he focused on Micah.
Micah sat next to Tucker, tears brimming in his eyes and his hands clasped in his lap. It hurt to see him this way. Tucker had been doing his best to protect Micah from any kind of pain, physical or emotional. It made Tucker feel helpless knowing he couldn’t protect Micah from this. The ulcer pain was very infrequent lately and somehow Tucker had managed to distract Micah when he started thinking about their relationship, but this? Tucker couldn’t shield Micah or himself from this. He glanced over at his dad, AJ and Juan. He couldn’t shelter them either.
Swallowing the lump in his throat, Tucker turned his head toward the preacher, not really hearing what he said. The graveside service was brief and before long they were tossing carnations on the casket and leaving the cemetery. Now they’d have to put up with guests. What idiot came up with that tradition? Did anyone really enjoy guests with tons of food tromping through your house after losing a loved one?
The hair on the back of Tucker’s arms stood as he walked to the limo hand in hand with Micah. People were staring. Tucker knew he probably shouldn’t show affection in public, but he needed the connection to Micah right now. Just knowing Micah was so close made the crushing sadness of losing his grandfather not quite so stifling. Tucker was being unfair though. There were going to be questions. Too many people had noticed them together. Some damage control would be in order, but Tucker didn’t know what to say. What would be less of a hassle for Micah? He had to live here in small-town Texas, Tucker was going back to Dallas. Tucker’s stomach tightened, tying in knots at the thought. He opened the door and let a silent Micah precede him. Damn, he was going to miss this. Miss the closeness they’d shared the past few days.
Micah scooted across the bench seat and turned to face Tucker. A smile lit Micah’s face and he patted the seat next to him. “Come on.”
AJ, Dad, Juan and Duncan all slid in from the other open door. AJ sat beside Micah, while Juan and Dad took the seat next to Duncan on the opposite side of the car.
After getting in, Tucker shut the door and studied his family. They were holding up pretty well. But then they’d had more time to get used to Granddad dying, hadn’t they? Guilt swamped Tucker. He should have been here too.
“It was nice. Ferguson would have liked it.” Tears filled Juan’s eyes before he averted his gaze out the window.
Dad smiled and patted Juan on the leg. “No, he wouldn’t have. He’d have been bored to death and half drunk already from taking discreet nips from the flask he’d hidden in his suit jacket.”
Everyone laughed except Duncan.
Tucker refused to let the SOB get to him today. He staunchly ignored his uncle just as everyone else was doing.
“Granddad didn’t do sad.” Tucker smiled, remembering the man and his crazy antics. Even at Grandma’s funeral he’d managed to remain in good spirits. If Tucker remembered correctly, Juan and Granddad had passed the flask back and forth between them in church. “Granddaddy was one of a kind.”
AJ nodded. “Yup. They broke the mold after they made him.”
Dad laughed. “Thank God.”
Again, everyone laughed but Duncan, who stared out the window, ignoring all of them.
It got quiet for a few minutes then Micah looked around at all of them. “I say we all have a drink tonight after everyone leaves. You know, our own celebration and remembrance.”
“He would’ve liked that.” Juan smiled.
Tucker started to remind Micah that he shouldn’t drink with his ulcer, but decided against it. Tucker would do something about it when the time came. There was no use getting into an argument now. He patted Micah’s leg, and then for the hell of it leaned over and kissed his cheek. When Tucker turned back to the front, everyone was watching him. Juan and Dad were smiling, AJ and Micah looked confused and Duncan was openly glaring.
After that, no one said anything. They rode back to The Bar D in silence, but Duncan’s look disturbed Tucker. It’d felt like the most natural thing in the world to kiss Micah, but Tucker knew that not everyone felt that way. There were always going to be men like Duncan around.
When they pulled up to the front door of the ranch house and stopped, everyone bailed out. AJ unlocked the front door with Micah and Juan hot on his heels. Duncan trailed behind at a slower pace and Dad stood at the other side of the car. He shut the door and stared across the car at Tucker. “Wanna talk while they get things ready for the horde that’s about to descend?”
Tucker closed his own door and frowned. “Sure, what’s up?”
Dad shrugged and walked around the car and up on the porch. “You just look like you have a lot on your mind.”
Following Dad around the side of the porch to the back, Tucker wished he already had the drink Micah proposed they all have. “I’m okay, are you?”
After pulling off his suit jacket, Dad laid it on the porch rail. He leaned his elbows on the jacket and looked out at the pasture. “I’m fine. Guess I dealt with it already. I miss him, sure, but living like he was the past couple of months is no way to live. I’m a little worried about Juan though. We’re gonna have to keep him busy.”
Tucker nodded and joined his dad, resting his forearms on the railing. “I think we can manage. I’m going to be putting money into the ranch.”
His dad looked at him and Tucker suddenly remembered that he didn’t know about Tucker and Micah’s arrangement.
Damn.
“If y’all will let me. Micah mentioned a breeding stock and I want to invest.”
Looking back out to the field where a couple of calves loped along playing not far from their mamas, Dad chuckled. “Want to tell me what’s going on?”
“What do you mean?”
“I know you and I know Micah. Why did you really marry?”
It was strange. Even though Tucker had gone into this marriage planning for this moment, he’d hoped it would never happen. Now that it had, he owed his dad an explanation. Tucker groaned and spilled the truth to his dad.
“I thought so. Well, I like the idea. I like you being home.”
Tucker dropped his head, feeling about two feet high. He hadn’t planned on staying. Could he? Would there be enough work here on the ranch to keep him busy? Truthfully, he didn’t need the money. An ache started deep in his chest. “Do you regret it?”
Dad looked at him, his black eyes serious. “Regret what?”
“Leaving the rodeo for our mom?”
“I don’t regret leaving the rodeo, but I regret her. I love this ranch and I love you boys, the rodeo just couldn’t compare. I got to chase my dream for a while, see what it’s like, but this—” He stood and swept his arms wide. “This, and my family, is worth any price. Even putting up with your mother’s desertion and losing my brother.”
Out of nowhere tears sprang to Tucker’s eyes and he dashed them away. The sunshine warmed his face, but his chest felt empty. Had he made the wrong decision in leaving to follow his career? He’d told himself that Micah was better off without him, but it wasn’t just Micah. Tucker missed his family and his…life. The ranch had been his life.
Dad touched his shoulder. “Don’t do this to yourself. You can’t change the past. You can only move on.”
Swallowing hard, Tucker nodded and fought back tears again.
Geez.
He was emotional today, but then why wouldn’t he be? It wasn’t every day he buried his grandfather.
“And don’t worry about the ranch. It’ll work out. Your granddad wouldn’t leave us high and dry.” He headed toward the door and stopped once he had the screen door open. “Don’t be too long. From the sounds of it we’re already receiving guests.” He opened the door, leaving Tucker alone with his thoughts.
Could he just come back? Was it that easy?
Something vibrated against his chest, startling him.
What the—?
Oh, his phone. Tucker extracted it from his suit jacket and looked at the display. He had an email. It was probably from his secretary. Tucker had neglected his work the past few days. He’d spent most of his time following Micah around in the guise of learning the ranch again. True, he’d been discussing the ranch decisions with Micah, but he’d also been keeping an eye on Micah. It had worked. Micah had let Tucker help, taking some of the load off Micah’s shoulders.
Tucker pushed the touchscreen to bring up his email. The mail was from the P.I. Tucker had looking into Duncan. Tucker scanned it quickly, learning that Duncan was broke. He’d filed bankruptcy a few years back, and Tucker’s mother had left shortly after. Tucker winced. That woman was a piece of work.
A soft breeze knocked his hair into his eyes and Tucker brushed it out. A nervous flutter settled in his stomach. It looked like Duncan was after money, which meant he’d fight their claim on the ranch. Could Tucker’s and Micah’s wedding of convenience hold up in court? If it didn’t, could they contest it in Dad’s favor? Would Dad’s living and working on the ranch all these years count? He wasn’t the oldest son. Maybe Duncan would allow Tucker to buy him out. Tucker’s heart sank. Dad, AJ and Micah would never allow Tucker to buy them the ranch…especially Micah. He’d think Tucker was abusing the power of money. Micah might want the ranch, but he was all about fairness and not using money to get one’s way. Which Tucker supposed he understood given Micah’s past.
“What’re you doing out here?” Micah appeared around the corner of the porch. He’d removed his suit jacket and tie and had his shirt sleeves rolled up.
Tucker swiftly put his phone away and held out his arm. “Nothing. Come here.”
Micah nestled himself against Tucker’s side and wrapped his arms around Tucker’s waist with ease.
Tucker’s heart leapt as he hugged Micah tight. Tucker didn’t want to lose this renewed closeness he had now with Micah, but could he keep from it? Even if he stayed, could he keep the ranch? He kissed the top of Micah’s head, marveling at the change in their relationship these past few days. It was almost too good to be true.
“
Dios
, I love it out here. Think anyone would notice if we don’t go back in?” Micah mumbled against his chest.
Tucker inhaled the fresh scent of Micah’s dark hair and glanced out over the pasture. He could almost see his granddad sitting on Cherry Blossom, a wad of chewing tobacco in his mouth. What would Granddad want? Tucker knew he wouldn’t want the ranch to go to Duncan. He knew that as sure as he breathed.
If only you’d been more specific in your wishes, Granddaddy.
The image in his head smiled.
“Fix it, Tucker. Do whatever it takes.”
Tucker squeezed Micah, making him yelp a little. Whatever it took, he’d keep the ranch where it belonged, even if Micah didn’t approve. To Tucker, his family’s and Micah’s happiness was worth more than his own.
Chapter Ten
“This is horse shit. You”—Duncan pointed at Micah—“you little— You knew about this. You knew what was in the will.”
Tucker raised a brow at Duncan, trying for intimidation, but the man stayed focused on Micah. It was probably in poor taste to have the will read so soon following the funeral, but Tucker wanted his uncle gone. Duncan’s presence was wearing on Dad.
Tucker had hoped that Duncan would let things go when he heard what was in the will, but the flutter in Tucker’s stomach and Duncan’s outrage attested to the futility of that.
Leaning back in the chair, Tucker propped his booted feet on the desk and hoped like hell Micah didn’t commence to pounding the shit outta Duncan. From the looks of Micah, he was running low on patience. And Tucker hadn’t helped any by taking the seat behind the desk. Micah was used to being in the place of power, and why not? Dad and AJ encouraged it, but Tucker was now in control of the situation, so Micah was going to have to get used to it. “Duncan—”
AJ bolted from the chair, banged his fist on the top of the old oak desk and glared at Duncan. “You’ve no right! Just who the fuck do you think you are? You aren’t even part of this family, you back-stabbing bastard. And speaking of which, where’s your whore?” AJ slammed his fist down again, making the penholder bounce and topple. Pens and pencils spilled off the front of the desk.
In rapt fascination, Tucker watched Duncan flinch at AJ’s outburst. It was a spectacular show of pique, but it wasn’t getting them anywhere. Whooping Duncan’s ass might actually be fun, but it was counterproductive. Tucker wanted the man gone and the easiest way to do that was to make it clear there was nothing else for him here now that Granddad was gone. Although maybe intimidation would keep Duncan from contesting the will.
Jumping out of his chair, Dad made a grab for the pens. “Damn it, AJ, sit your ass down and stop the hollerin’. Just because Duncan’s an asshole doesn’t mean you have to be.”
“Fuck you, Jeff.” Duncan turned his glare from Micah to Dad, but the statement had very little heat behind it. He sighed, some of the tension leaving his shoulders. He looked tired too.
Standing from the fireplace hearth, Micah smiled and helped Dad pick up the mess AJ had made.
“But, Daddy—” AJ started.
“Don’t
but Daddy
me.” Dad rose from picking up a pen and pointed it at AJ, ignoring Duncan altogether. “Sit!”
AJ shut right up, dropping back into the beat-up brown leather desk chair with a groan.
“Your mother left me several years ago. Found some other sap with a bigger bank account.” Duncan glanced up at Jeff. “Go ahead, say I told you so, and crow about how you were right.”
“What good would that do?” Jeff raised a brow. “I’d say from the looks of it, you figured that out.”
Ouch.
If Tucker hadn’t been so worried over the outcome of the ranch, he might have laughed at the non-confrontational jab his dad threw at Duncan.
Tucker cleared his throat to gain everyone’s attention. “Duncan, my marriage is none of your business, but I’m the first to marry and the ranch is being put in my name, end of story. From now on if you’ve something to say, you’ll say it to me, not Micah.”
Micah’s head popped up from behind the desk. He scowled at Tucker then went back to picking up the clutter on the floor.
Tucker noted the warning gleam in those baby browns. Irritated or not, Micah looked much better these past few days. He had his contacts in instead of glasses, so the lack of bags under his eyes was apparent. Now, if Tucker could just keep him from overworking himself again…
AJ whispered something else Tucker couldn’t make out, and Micah chuckled. Micah’s mirth shot right through Tucker. He liked that sound. That was the Micah Tucker was used to. Tucker grinned. That was the Micah he loved, not the tired, grouchy—
Oh damn. A lump formed in Tucker’s throat. He swallowed, trying to push the thought away, but he couldn’t. He
did
love Micah. He always had. At first, it was just a brotherly kind of love like he felt for AJ, but now it was different. The realization shook Tucker to the core. He’d wanted Micah ever since the first night Micah had given himself to Tucker. He’d tried to convince himself he’d never gotten close to anyone because of what he watched his dad go through when his mom left, but it was a lie. No one had measured up to Micah, even when Micah had been too young. But he wasn’t now.
“This is bullshit, Tucker. We both know you’ve no need for this”—waving his arms, Duncan motioned around the room—“place. You pretending to be a fag is a waste of your time. I’m the oldest. The ranch should go to me. When’s the last time you were even here?”
“None of your fuckin’ business who any of us sleep with,” AJ mumbled.
Micah pinched AJ’s thigh as he stood and placed the last of the pens back in the penholder. “Quit antagonizing,” he whispered.
Ignoring them both, Tucker dropped his feet and sat straight. “Duncan, when was the last time you were here? Don’t pretend to know anything about me. I’m only going to tell you this one more time. You’d better cease with the name-calling. If anyone has a right to be upset over this, it’s my dad, not you. The ranch is mine now and that is that. I’ll do with it as I see fit. Micah and this ranch are none of your business. So I suggest you pack your bags and be out of here within the hour.”
Tucker stood. Glancing at AJ, Tucker jerked his head toward the door. He needed to think, somewhere away from Micah, and he had a feeling if he didn’t get AJ away from their uncle, Tucker was going to end up replacing office furniture. “Goodbye. You’re welcome to take a few mementos, but you’ll clear them with my dad first.” He walked around the desk and motioned for AJ to follow.
“Nice speech, big brother.” AJ slapped him on the back as they reached the back door.
Tucker tried to smile, but with all that was on his mind it fell short. “Thanks.” He’d missed his family something fierce. He should have been here all this time instead of in Dallas. Sure, he’d made a name for himself and a lot of money too, but family was what mattered. It was a damn shame it took his granddad dying to drive the point home.
They headed out toward the corral, walking side by side. It was a companionable silence, one Tucker and AJ, and Micah too for that matter, always shared. Tucker had missed this time with his brother as much as he’d missed the time with Micah.
Damn it.
He was a selfish bastard, but he wanted Micah permanently. Tucker regretted leaving the way he did, even if it was for the best at the time.
“Think he regrets it?”
“What?” Tucker glanced at his brother. What was AJ, a mind reader now?
AJ stared out into the west pasture, his brow furrowed, looking a little worried. “Duncan. You think he regrets hightailing it outta here with our egg donor? Think he misses his family?”
Tucker shrugged. “Don’t know. Maybe. I doubt it. But he burned his bridges. He was a fool. Did he really think he could make a relationship work with her? Hell, he should’ve known what she was like when she cast Dad and us aside so easily.” He suspected the only thing Duncan regretted was going bankrupt.
“Yeah, what kind of man falls for a woman who’d leave her children? Don’t know what he has against Micah, but it’s pissing me off.” They arrived at the corral fence, and AJ leaned his arms against the top rail and put his booted foot on the bottom. “Speaking of the brat, what’s up with you and Micah?”
“I wish I knew.” Tucker mimicked AJ’s pose, staring out at a calf and its mother.
“He looks better. He’s been running himself ragged. Don’t know what we’d have done without him. I hate doing the books. Dad sucks at it and well, Micah hates it too, but he’s good at it. Problem is Granddad’s hospital bills nearly did us in. Did you know Micah used that fifteen grand he got as an inheritance to pay stuff off?” AJ glanced over at Tucker, making eye contact. “He doesn’t know that I know.”
Well, son of a bitch.
It sounded exactly like something Micah would do. Tucker growled at the reminder of how badly Micah had been treated after his parents’ deaths. If it wasn’t for Juan, Micah probably would have gone to a foster home. “I’ll make sure he gets every penny back.”
“He won’t take it.” AJ looked back at the silver pipe fence. He started picking at the silver paint. “I wouldn’t insult him by trying to pay it back.” He shrugged. “You gotta pay him back without him knowing. He’s part of this family. Paying him back would seem like we didn’t think so.” AJ flicked a piece of silver off the rail with his thumbnail. “I just hate to see him going back to worrying over the finances. Not surprised he has an ulcer. He works harder than two men. We had to let go of the hands and Micah has single-handedly tried to take all five of their places, plus Granddad’s.” AJ was silent for several moments, and when he spoke again it was quieter, almost a whisper. “He’s happy. He doesn’t like turning over things to you, which I guess is understandable, but he’s glad you’re back. We all are.”
Tucker leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand that rested on the fence. He could understand why Micah didn’t like turning things over to him. Micah had made a place for himself here and he saw Tucker as a threat to that. Micah thought Tucker was going to take over his spot. Funny, Tucker hadn’t realized it before, but Micah had taken over the spot Tucker left when he moved to Dallas.
“What’re you grinning at?”
“What?” Tucker turned his head, looking at his younger brother. “Just thinking that Micah took over my spot when I left.”
“Nah. There’s still room for you. Micah’s always had his own spot.”
“Yeah. I guess he has.” Micah belonged with them…with Tucker. Deep down he’d always known it, but he’d tried like hell to deny it. He couldn’t have stayed. It wouldn’t have been fair to Micah. Micah had needed to find his own way…to grow up. Hell, in the back of Tucker’s mind he still felt like he wasn’t giving Micah much of a choice. Tucker wanted Micah to want him for him, not because of some childhood crush.
“Yeah.” AJ chuckled. “He has. Is it sinking in?”
“Is what sinking in?”
“The fact that Micah has always been yours.”
Tucker started. “What do you mean by that?”
“I mean you can run but you can’t hide. It’s time to come home, big brother. Micah needs you. We all do.”
“It won’t work.”
“Why not?” AJ scoffed. “And don’t use our dad’s relationship as an excuse. He didn’t love her any more than she loved him. You and Micah don’t have that problem.”
Tucker stood and climbed up on the top post, sitting. Put that way, it made perfect sense. “Well shit.” Tucker’s mood lifted, leaving him damn near giddy. Staying and making Micah his for real was still a gamble, but not near as scary after talking to AJ. “I guess I’m staying. Or commuting at the very least.”
“Now that that’s out of the way, what’re we gonna do about the ranch? Something tells me Duncan isn’t going to let things rest.”
“Yeah, something tells me that too. I had hoped mine and Micah’s marriage would take care of it. I have lawyers looking into it, but—” Tucker glanced over at his brother, wondering if he could trust AJ with what he was thinking. Tucker knew Micah and his dad would be opposed to his idea, they had way too much pride. And Micah had a skewed view of this sort of thing because of his past. Not that Tucker could blame him. “Can I trust you to keep your mouth shut and let me do what’s best?”
“Something tells me your plan isn’t going to be very popular.”
“Probably not, but I’ll be damned if I let you, Dad and Micah down. It’s my job to take care of Micah, and losing the ranch isn’t in his best interest. But he wouldn’t want me to contest the will.” Tucker ran his hands down his face, regretting what he was thinking, but knowing it was for the best. He’d just have to keep Micah from finding out. “So, I’m going to buy Duncan out. It’s the lesser of two evils.”
There was a gasp behind them.
Tucker’s heart plummeted to his feet, and he turned to find Micah standing no more than four feet away.