HellKat (6 page)

He scanned across the street. Then she rounded the corner. His nervous pacing halted as he slid into the shadows and onto a bench sitting under a burnt-out lamppost.

The pressure mounted in his throat about how this night would end.

The beautiful couple held hands, laughed, and cozied up to one another in the cool night air. Tucker’s stomach tightened and his lungs stopped midbreath from the sight of her, like the other times, and like the first time six months ago. His eyes roamed to her long, shapely legs, teasing and tormenting him with the memories of having been wrapped around his body. Then his attention traveled higher. Her hair longer, layers bouncing. The evening breeze kicked up, swept some strands across her face, and her date tucked the flyaways behind her ear. Tucker’s heart squeezed into a hard knot. He knew
that
guy was Kat’s type—not him—or at least that’s what she believed. He sighed, knowing he had his work cut out for him.

He hoped six months had been enough of a cooling-off period for her. Hoped she would at least hear him out now. He hated like hell what had happened between them. Well, only hated what had happened the next day. He wasn’t expecting a warm reception tonight, just a chance, an opportunity to say his peace, and see if it made any difference, any at all.

He would man-up tonight. He would be the man he should’ve been the first time.

At forty-one, Tucker had been around the block a few times. A serious relationship or two, girlfriends here and there, but not one of those women had stood out like Kat James. Not one had left the impression on him she had, and he wanted to know why. The last time he’d left the Big Apple, he’d had his tail between his legs. This time it wouldn’t end that way.

However it ended.

Kat and her date wrapped themselves up in each other, kissing and hugging. Then the guy shuffled her back into the shadows for some privacy. Things had heated up. Tucker white-knuckled the bench seat. He closed his eyes and dropped his head.
Don’t let him up, Kat. Don’t. Not tonight
. After holding his breath for a bit, Tucker glanced up at the sound of her voice. The brake lights of a taxi flashed, then a door shut. Kat stood across the street by herself, watching the cab as it pulled away from the curb. She stayed rooted for a moment, her fingers brushing across her lips as if she questioned her decision, and then shook her head.

He pushed to his feet as she headed up the stairs to her third-floor walk-up.

With long, purposeful strides, Tucker made quick work of crossing the narrow street. His heart raced, but his mind cleared the closer he got to her. Keys rattled as she readied to unlock the door.

“Kathryn James.”

She stiffened, dropping the keys in a loud clatter on the concrete stoop.

Tentatively, he moved up a few steps. She knelt to retrieve her keys and then swung around to glare down at him. The sway of tree branches mixed with the dim streetlight painted animated shadows across Kat’s face, cloaked the mood harbored in her eyes but not in her self-assured posture. He climbed a few more steps toward her. She appeared calm, passing cool judgment.

She scrutinized him from head to toe.

“Is this a bad dream? Or a bad joke?”

He flinched at her harsh tone, knew he had it coming—and a lot more. Now he wondered if six months had been long enough. Maybe there was no such thing.

“I was hopin’ we could talk, Kat. Maybe you’d let me buy you a coffee or ...” He stopped short. Thought it best to hold his words based on her unfavorable expression.

“Why would I do that?”

“Well, I’m sure there’re things you’d like to say to me. And I deserve every one of them.” He slid his hands into his back pockets. He stood strong against her unrelenting stare, determined not to break away from it or cower underneath it. “I owe you at least that. I’m not in the habit of hurting women. It’s never been my style. There’s nothin’ good to be gained from it.”

“Right, Tucker. Nothing to be gained—except maybe a sweeter deal for you. Is that what you were after? A higher return on your investment? A bigger piece of
my
company? What?”

“I didn’t even think that far ahead, Kat. I knew you’d be pissed when you saw me that morning, and rightly so. But I was going to leave it up to you that day whether we moved forward with a deal. I’d done my homework. I already knew your company was a sound investment before the meeting. But I was more interested in you at that point than your business.”

She remained silent, the wheels in her head clearly grinding. Then her eyes softened, unless it was just wishful thinking on his part.

“What’re you doing here, Tucker? Really? Are you here on business?”

Before he could answer, a tenant shoved through the door, sidestepping them and bounding down the steps as a chatty group pushed by to enter the building. Her eyes continued to bore down into his. He decided to move up the last couple steps so they were level. Equals.

“Before you knew who I was, before I earned your contempt, weren’t you the least bit curious about me? Didn’t you want to know more about me?” Her features tightened in reflection. He chose to take her silence as progress. He knew damn well if she disagreed, she wouldn’t hold back.

“It doesn’t matter now, Tucker. There’s nowhere to go from where we started. We both know that.”

She was curious. He could hear it in her voice, see it in her eyes. His heart raced. He leaned closer and now he could smell her clean, sweet scent.

“Who says? We get to decide that, Kat. Nobody else.”

Her face remained placid, impenetrable.

“You never answered me. Are you here on business?”

He wanted to touch her, kiss her. Make her believe him.

Make her see him.

“No. I’m here for you.”

****

The moment his low rumble and distinct cadence rolled through her like thunder, her body had remembered, had unleashed the memories of him. Kat’s knees had almost buckled from the initial impact. Now, staring into his eyes, breathing in his masculine scent, feeling the heat from his body, she made a silent vow to remain focused and not act like a fool. Her head had a firm grip on the reins this time, not her hormones. She’d spent the last month getting to know a terrific man. A man for whom she had not once felt the hot spark of electricity, the sizzle of chemistry licking at her skin at this moment, and from the moment he’d said her name.

Her full name.

No one called her Kathryn, except her mother. For some reason, when he’d said it, she liked it. Wanted to hear it again. It’d all left her feeling angry and confused.

Why was life playing this joke on her?

“Why?” The one-word query asked as much to herself as to Tucker.

“Because I can’t forget you. I know I probably should, but I can’t. I’m tired of fightin’ it, Kat. I want to know why I can’t forget that night and everything leadin’ up to it.” Hope flickered in his eyes. “Can we go somewhere? A coffee shop, a diner? Hell, I don’t care, a park bench. I just want to talk to you. I want you to know who I am, and I want to know you.
Please
?” His whisper held a hint of desperation.

The truth in his words was evident in the emotion crisscrossing the rugged planes of his face. He’d laid his cards on the table. There’d be no harm in hearing him out, right? She could speak her peace too. Maybe then she could move forward with Grant.

She looked away, cleared her throat, and nodded. “There’s an all-night diner around the corner. We can go there.”

His face shaded in relief. “That sounds great.”

He stepped aside and allowed Kat to lead the way.

They walked side by side, silent, Tucker with his hands dug down in his front pockets, Kat with her arms folded. Now they sat in a booth opposite one another, sipping their coffees, strangers more now than six months ago.

Not knowing what to say, Kat sat quiet. The burden of proof belonged to the man across the table anyway. Since Tucker had initiated this face-to-face, he could start the ball rolling. She leaned back against the padded booth, holding his stare with her own determined one.

Finally, Tucker approached the minefield of his making. “I am sorry about what happened, Kat. It’s not what I wanted. I ...” His eyes flicked away and he shook his head. “You don’t remember seein’ me that day before I talked to you at the bar, do you?” She thought about it and then shook her head. “I didn’t think so.” He scratched along his jaw, and sighed.

“Well, I saw you. I saw you up the street, runnin’ and dodgin’ people.” He smiled at the memory. “I still don’t understand how you women run in heels.” He shook his head in disbelief, and maybe even a little awe. “Your legs, I noticed immediately. Your umbrella lifted up a few times and I saw your face, stopped my heart for a beat or two. Then I saw where you were headed, knew right then I had to get to the door before you did. Had to find a way to get your attention.” His eyes dropped. “But it didn’t work. You looked right past me, like I wasn’t even there. I heard your name when you checked in, and then I knew I had a decision to make.” He looked down at the coffee mug squeezed between his large hands.

“We can argue all night about me not comin’ clean on who I was. But the truth, for me, is once I knew you didn’t recognize my name, didn’t know I was the one you were waiting for, I decided then and there to be Tucker Williams—the man, not the
pompous venture capitalist
.” He paused, searched for recognition. She rewarded him with the hint of a grin at the echo of her own words. “I wanted a chance, Kat. I wanted you. I wanted you to flirt with me the way you did that pretty boy behind the bar.”

He chewed at the inside of his cheek and waited. Kat glanced down at her lap, attempted to hide her smile.

“I’m not the sorta guy you usually go for, am I?”

“Not even close.”

“So why did you, Kat?”

He seemed to need an answer as much as she did.

“I’m not sure, other than,” she glanced away, back in time, “I just wanted to ... I wanted you.

“I haven’t done anything like that since I was in college—a lifetime ago. I’m a grown woman now with rules. I exercise good judgment, and I certainly don’t have one-night stands with strangers. I can’t even blame it on alcohol. It was all me, sober, lucid ...” She looked away, a hint of anguish in her expression.

“I’m glad it was all you, Kat, and nothin’ else.” His hand stretched closer to hers, near enough to touch her, but he didn’t. “And I’m damn glad you broke your rules with me. Makes me think you need to change your rules, about who your type is and all. I’m sure you have one of those lists, don’t you?” She tried to hold her grip on the veil he’d begun to lift away. “I was pretty sure I didn’t make the cut from the get-go. And after what happened, you probably decided you were right about me all along. I’d like the chance to prove otherwise, Kat.” His confidence now boosted, optimism shimmered in his eyes.

She tried her best to come up with reasons why it would be a terrible idea. Kat had Googled him after the meltdown at her office; she knew a lot more about him now. Like his investments in and commitment to alternative energies and the environment, and his philanthropy in Helena and the communities surrounding it. The horse ranch he lived on in Montana, and how he’d come to run Diamond Industries. After her Internet snooping, she’d felt like a pretentious shit. She’d behaved no better than the rest of her snooty family, with her condescending misjudgments based on his appearance and pronunciations.

This man had real depth, heart.

However, she still stood by the conclusion she’d drawn.

“Tucker, like I already said, there’s nowhere to go—”

He cut in, his impatience clear. “Who says, Kat? Some book? Some magazine you read? Who? Because that just doesn’t fit my way of thinking. Why can’t we start from right here?” His finger tapped the table. “Right now. I know we didn’t have an ideal start, but we can change that. We can make whatever we want out of this.”

He settled back against his seat while she tossed around his proposal in her head. Time to cut to the chase. “I don’t think you love that guy you were with tonight.”

Her demeanor stiffened.

“You don’t know anything about him, Tucker,” she said, her words barbed.

“I know you didn’t invite him up the last three nights.”

“You’ve been following me?” Her mouth fell open in shock.

His admission came without hesitation or remorse. “Wanted to make sure you didn’t have a boyfriend before I talked to you, that’s all.”

“And if I had invited him up tonight, what then?”

He stared at her for a few seconds, obviously mulling the possibility over.

“I’m not exactly sure. I’m just glad you didn’t.”

A befuddled puff of air blew past Kat’s lips. “Okay, this is just nuts, Tucker. You don’t even live here. What you’re suggesting isn’t even a remote possibility.” She angled closer. “If your conscience demanded you come back to apologize for what happened, to make yourself or me feel better, then fine, mission accomplished. Okay? You can go back to Montana with a clear conscience now.” She sat back, arms crossed, chin lifted in a challenge. “I’ll even take the pins out of your voodoo doll when I get home tonight.”

His eyes ignited with awareness, a newly stoked fire apparent in them. A slow grin pulled across his face, then he eased across the table.

“Got a voodoo doll of me, huh? You been thinkin’ about me too, darlin’?”

Kat’s mouth opened in a mute reply. Her pulse quickened, blood sizzled, from that one damned word uttered from his made-for-sin lips.

“Good to know.” He retreated to his side of the table, picked up his mug, and took a slow drink, his lids creasing further over the top of the ceramic cup.

She pushed aside the rush of hormones in an attempt to refocus on his earlier comment about Grant. “You don’t have a clue what’s going on with the man I was with tonight, Tucker. I’ve been seeing him for a while now. It’s serious.”

She didn’t even sound convincing to herself.

“Then why are you sittin’ here with me?”

Kat huffed. “You asked to talk. I obliged. My mistake—
again
.”

He seemed to ignore her dig and instead plowed further into his fantasy world.

“Let’s do things right this time. Go out with me, Kat. We’ll do whatever you all do here in New York. Can’t be all that different from back home. I can stick around here in your neck of the woods for a while and then,” he shrugged, “you can come back to Montana with me for a while. We’ll get to know each other that way. How’s that sound?”

“You
cannot
be that thickheaded. Did you not just hear me say I’m already in a relationship? We’re serious, Tucker.”

He appeared not to hear her, or believe her.

“And I’m sure there’ll be rules. You’ll no doubt set those and make them as challenging as possible.” His lips twisted in a hard-to-control grin.

“Oh, there’s going to be rules, all right. For starters: no sex.
Period
. I don’t even want to hold your hand.” Oh, hell no, she did not just say those things! What was it about this man that made her lose all good sense?

And what about Grant?

There was the bucket of cold water she’d needed.

Kat’s stomach tightened as images of Grant flashed in her mind. They really were a picture-perfect couple. Her family and friends loved him, insisted he was the ideal man for her. She hadn’t yet found a reason to disagree with their assessment. However, as picture perfect as Grant appeared, Kat couldn’t shake the feeling they lacked a certain vibe in the chemistry department. But lack of sizzle with Grant was no excuse to make the same mistake twice with the mountain man who now sat across from her.

She closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and tried to shake off the Tucker Williams curse.

Her hands sliced through the air with her decision. “Forget it. Forget I said
any
of that. It’s
not
happening.”

Tucker shook his head, the hint of victory written on his face. “Can’t take it back now. It’s a done deal, sweetheart. I’m in it to win it.” He angled his chin down, his broad smile and dimples highlighting the determination in his blue eyes. “There’s nothin’ I like more than a challenge. So you can either tell this guy you were with tonight he’s out, or I can do it for you. I’d like it to just be you and me. That’s how I’m leanin’. How ’bout you?”

She gawked at him, then snorted with indignation. “That’s how you’re
leanin’.
” The nerve of this man! Kat shook her head in annoyance and scanned the bustle in the café before her troubled eyes roamed out to the busy street beyond.

Why? Why did her heart race, her body explode with desire at the mere thought of acting on Tucker’s suggestion? The possibilities thrilled her. She must be certifiable, right? This could only be about sex, though there
wasn’t
going to be any, she reminded herself, even as raw lust nibbled and teased at her flesh. Sometimes in life a person had an undeniable, primal, chemical reaction to another—
lust
, pure and simple; it didn’t mean there was anything else, anything to keep them warm once the fire lost its oxygen.

Kat settled her wary eyes on the rugged man before her, replayed their encounter from all those months ago. His provocative words. His blond hair, loose and wild. His eyes with their promise of satisfaction, and maybe something more. His scruffy jaw as it had scraped along every inch of her body. His hands. The hands of a man accustomed to hard work. The feel of them against her skin …

Life was short, too short to go without answers to the most important question: what if? She allowed the memories to wash over her. Then clarity gripped hold of her conscience, refocused her mind, and presented another possibility. One she hoped she could live with, one she hoped she wouldn’t soon regret. But if she did, she would at least have her answer.

And that she could live with.

“Despite the impression I undoubtedly left you with, I
do
have impulse control, and I intend on exercising it—
rigorously.
” Her words served a stern warning. She did not want him to mistake her concession as anything casual. “So, if you’re really here for a repeat
performance, then just get up and leave now. It’s
not
happening, Tucker. And I don’t want to waste my time, especially when I have a good man in my life right now.”

Tucker considered her words. Then he eased across the table again, his expression serious. “You won’t be wasting your time, Kat. Scout’s honor. And considering how things ended last time, I don’t want a repeat performance myself, just so we’re clear.”

He rested his hand next to hers. “Just you and me, right? So we can get a fix on this.” He gestured between them.

She stared like a love-struck schoolgirl.

“Until we get a fix,” she whispered, as butterflies took flight in her belly.

His expression triumphant, he winked. “Oh, this is gonna be fun, sweetheart. How do you want to start? Can I take you to lunch tomorrow and then dinner after work?”

She cleared her throat, back straightened, at the reminder of what lay ahead tomorrow.

“I already have lunch plans.”

“With your
ex
-boyfriend?”

Kat scowled. “Yes, Tucker. I’m at least going to have the decency to talk to him in person.”

“Oh. Thought maybe you could just text him or somethin’.” He tucked his lips together in a grin.

“How long are you even going to be here?” she asked, holding her breath. She recognized the faraway look, the dreamy state, his eyes lingering on her lips. He’d gone back to
that
night, their night. The powerful vibe from him was unmistakable. He wanted to kiss her, to touch her. He appeared stuck, at war with himself. Kat flushed with intense heat at her own memories melding with his, drawing her nearer. Then she shoved the thoughts aside, determined her brain would rule this time, not the impatient throbbing between her legs.