Having Faith (12 page)

Out of this initial introduction to the Callaghans and their kinsmen, several things became blatantly clear.  One, they were every bit as close as Lacie made them out to be.  Two, they were loud and boisterous.  And three, they were a prolific bunch. 

Everyone seemed nice enough, offering smiles and welcomes.  No one grilled her beyond asking how she was settling in and what she thought of the area so far, but Faith sensed their curiosity.  Kieran remained in close proximity, his hand lightly behind her shoulder or lower back, and she drew a lot of strength from that.  Lacie seemed to pick up on her discomfort and stayed relatively near as well.

“Hang around for a bit?” Kieran asked Faith hopefully when the men started gathering for their annual football game.

“We really should be going,” Faith said, aware of the curious glances being cast her way, no doubt wondering exactly what her relationship was with Kieran.  He had been very considerate in his introductions, though even she had been a bit surprised by the constant contact, thankful though she was for it.  It was making them wonder, too, and she was sure that it had to do with the fact that of this huge clan, Kieran was the youngest, and only single, male.  Any woman in which he showed even the slightest interest was fair game for analysis and inspection.

“Please?” he asked, his face so hopeful that she found herself nodding.  She chastised herself vehemently – and silently – as she watched him walk away with that devastating half-smile plastered on his face.  If she had any hope of retaining her sanity, she was going to have to work on developing an immunity to such things.

A few minutes later, she found herself wandering over to watch as ten men took to the field, seven Callaghans and three Connellys, five on each team.  Around the perimeter of the field, Faith noticed that others were gathering to watch as well.  It was no surprise, really.  When you had that many gorgeous, muscular men concentrated in one small area, it was bound to draw some attention.  She had to admit, she was enjoying the show herself.

She kept a close eye on Kieran, inwardly cheering whenever he managed to break free of a tackle or take someone down.  He was one of the biggest of the bunch.  There were two or three that were about his size – a golden-haired blonde and his brother from the Connelly side, and the one she thought might have been called Jake – but only one that was bigger.  Kane.  She had no trouble remembering his name; that man was intensity personified.  When introduced to him earlier, she’d had the odd sensation of standing next to a thunderstorm.

Regardless, they all moved with a fluid, masculine grace that was mesmerizing to watch.

At one point Kieran looked over at her and waved.  The next moment he was hit so hard the gathered crowd moaned for him en masse.  Faith flinched and winced as he went down.  Within seconds, though, Kieran was back on his feet and shouting back at Kane. 

“Be ready, old man!” he taunted, earning himself several chuckles and head shakes from the others.  Kane smiled and beckoned him with two fingers.  “Give it your best shot, pup.”

“Boys,” laughed the woman called Rebecca.  Faith had a hard time imagining how such a small, soft-spoken, gentle woman could end up with a force of nature like Kane.  Several other women joined her in knowing nods. 

One of the men not participating in the game – Lacie had introduced him as her brother Brian – was talking with Matt.  At least her son seemed at ease, she thought with some comfort. It wasn’t that they weren’t nice – she couldn’t imagine a nicer group of people.  Faith just couldn’t shake the feeling that she didn’t really belong here.  The sense that she was being discreetly inspected didn’t help, either.

The men returned from their game, sweaty and dirty but grinning like idiots as they allowed their wives to tend to their various scrapes and bruises. 

“This is their favorite part,” confided Maggie to Faith with a smirk.  “Tough guys, all of them, but they love for us to pamper them.”  She winked.  “Almost as much as we love doing it.”

Faith watched as the men made their way to their wives.  All except Kieran.  He walked over to one of the many water coolers, grabbed a wet rag and attempted to clean himself off.  Faith wasn’t sure if she should offer to help him or not, but the sight of him trying to reach a spot in the middle of his back made up her mind.

“Come here,” she commanded, taking pity on him.  Faith swung her leg up and over, balancing on the railing of the pavilion so she could reach between his shoulder blades.  Kieran grinned and handed her the wet cloth.

“Thanks,” he said, gratefully.

Faith suddenly became aware of the interested looks of his family.  She blushed dark red and handed the cloth hurriedly back to Kieran before leaping from the railing.  “You’re welcome.” 

She shoved her hands in the back pockets of her jean shorts, cursing the fact that they still tingled from where she had run her hands across his back.  Talk about awkward.

Matt chose that moment to approach her.  “Mom!  Ian says I can help with the fireworks, but only if you say yes.  Can I?”

Fireworks
?  “Oh, Matt, I don’t know about that,” she hedged, biting her lip.  She didn’t want to embarrass her son in front of everyone.  “What do you know about fireworks?”

“We won’t let him do anything too dangerous,” Ian said, joining them.  He had a mischievous glint to his eyes and Faith instinctively knew he was the smooth-talking trouble-maker.  Every family had one.

Faith raised a doubtful eyebrow, giving him her full-fledged mother glare that let Ian know that she knew he was full of shit.  His response was to grin even wider.  Maybe it didn’t work as well on grown men who towered a foot or so over her and had families of their own.  Go figure.

“I won’t let anything happen to him, Faith,” Kieran promised quietly.  “You have my word.”

Against her better judgment (she seemed sorely lacking in the willpower department today), Faith nodded. 

“Don’t worry, Faith,” Ian said, sharing a fist bump with Matt.  “We’ll bring him back with all of his parts.”

“And if we don’t,” the one called Sean added over his shoulder, “Mick can reattach them.”

Faith paled, despite the fact that she knew they were teasing.  “He really will be alright, you know,” assured Lacie.  Nicki laughed, and Faith was almost hypnotized by her super light silvery eyes.  “You know men.  Explosive incendiaries are like a rite of passage.  A male bonding ritual, if you will.”

Unable to watch, Faith excused herself to visit one of the fairground’s restrooms.  The port-o-potties would have been closer, but she welcomed the chance to walk for a bit and stretch her legs.  It felt good to be swallowed up by the crowd, just another anonymous face.  The intense scrutiny at the pavilion was starting to wear her down.

It was clear to see that they were very protective of Kieran, and she couldn’t blame them.  Lacie had already warned her how desirable Kieran was, and Faith had seen enough with her own eyes to substantiate that claim.  What none of them seemed to understand, however, was that she was not trying to “catch” Kieran.  She was simply his friend, and wanted nothing more from him.

Liar
, her conscience scolded as she slowly made her way back to the pavilion, keeping to the shadows as a force of habit.  She did want more.  Just as she wanted a lot of things she knew she could never have.  It didn’t make a difference, though.  She’d made her bed a long time ago, and now she had to lie in it, as her father had so often said.

A pang of disappointment went through her, but she stifled it immediately.  She had no cause for self-pity.  She was blessed with a wonderful son, a steady job with good benefits, and a roof over their heads.  They were healthy and happy, adjusting to their new life and making new friends.  She should be grateful for all of the gifts she had been given, instead of longing for those she hadn’t. 

“K
ieran said she works for the Goddess,” Taryn said to Lexi, looking out toward the walkway where Faith had disappeared into the crowd.  “Do you know her?”

“No,” Lexi said, sipping her tea as her baby daughter Kate snuggled in her lap.  “But then I wouldn’t unless she was part of the kitchen staff.  Aidan?”

Lexi’s longtime friend and business partner, Aidan Harrison was the owner and CEO of the Celtic Goddess chain.  “I hadn’t met her personally before tonight, no,” he answered carefully.

Lexi looked at him, her surprise evident.  Aidan made it his personal business to meet with everyone who worked for him.  “Why not?”

He shrugged.  “Marco’s been handling it.  She’s a transfer from our Georgia location.”

“Marco?” Lexi mused, trying to put a face with the familiar name.  “Head of Environmental?”

Aidan nodded.  Lexi frowned.  Something didn’t sound right.  “Kieran thought she was hired as an interior design consultant or something like that.”

“No.”

“Then what does she do, exactly?” Nicki asked.

“Environmental handles upkeep and maintenance.”

“You mean she’s a maid?” Taryn blurted out.  Aidan, looking slightly uneasy, nodded.

“So what?”  Lexi asked.  “What difference does it make what she does?  Lacie said she’s really nice and Kieran likes her and her son.”

“I’m still having trouble processing that,” Taryn said, outspoken as usual.  “How could she have a son that old?  I mean, she looks so young.  What was she, like, ten when she had him?”

“Fifteen, actually.”  Faith’s quiet voice spoke up from behind them, startling them all.  “Though I was fourteen when I got pregnant, so you’re not too far off.”

Expressions on the faces of those in the pavilion ranged from embarrassed to mortified.  Taryn was the first to speak.  “Faith, I’m so sorry.  I didn’t mean to - ”

“Don’t worry about it,” Faith said with a tight smile.  She’d had more than enough practice at this over the years, and had heard far worse words spoken in conjecture over her and her son, sometimes right to her face. 

It had taken longer for someone to say something than she’d thought, and they had been quite polite about it, all things considered.  It still hurt.  It always did.  Maybe some small part of her had hoped that things might be different here, but human nature was the same everywhere, it turned out.  At least there was some comfort to be had in consistency. 

Regardless, Faith had no desire to remain any longer.  The lighthearted, fun atmosphere had taken a decided downturn, and her presence was making things awkward for everyone.  “When Matt comes back, will you tell him to meet me at the car?”

“You can’t leave now!  You’ll miss the fireworks!”  Lacie said, jumping to her feet. 

But Faith was already walking away.  Lacie jogged to catch up to her.  “Faith, please don’t go.  Watch the fireworks with us.  Kieran will wonder what’s happened to you.”

Kieran was a smart man.  He’d figure it out.  And it was for the best.  For the past few hours, Faith had felt out of place, and now she was just ready to go home and put it behind her.  “Thanks, Lacie, but no.  Please tell everyone I said goodnight, okay?”

Faith disappeared back into the darkness, the pavilion silent behind her.

* * *

“W
here’s Faith?” Kieran said, jogging up to the pavilion and looking around after the phenomenal display had gone off without a hitch.  Matt, smiling broadly, and proudly still sporting every one of his fingers, came up beside him.

“Matt, Faith said you should meet her at the car,” Lacie said quietly.  Matt’s smile faded and a dark look came over his features.  He nodded, said a quick thanks to Kieran and the others before taking off toward the parking lot.

“What’s going on?” Kieran asked.

“She’s gone,” Lacie said, gratefully stepping into the protection of Shane’s arms.  It was impossible not to note the tension in the pavilion.

“I can see that,” he said impatiently.  “Why?”

Lexi bit her lip, shifting the now-sleeping Kate over to her daddy.  “I’m sorry, Kier.  We messed up.”

“Messed up?  How?”

With help from an apologetic Taryn, they explained what happened.  Kieran remained quiet, but his features grew uncharacteristically hard.  By the time they finished, Kieran looked at each of them.  “Funny,” he said, his voice even softer than usual.  “I never figured any of you for snobs.”

“You know better than that, Kier,” Jake said warningly in his deep voice, but Kieran ignored him.  He stalked off toward the parking lot, pulling out his mobile before they could say anything else.  He didn’t want to hear it.  The only person he wanted to talk to was Faith. 

He dialed Faith’s number, not surprised when it went right to voice mail.  Good thing he had an ally.

“
Where r u?
” he texted Matt.

“
On r way home
,” came the immediate reply.

“
Ur mom ok?
”

This time there was a slight pause in the response.  “
idk
”. 
I don’t know.
 

Shit
.

––––––––

“F
aith, it’s Kieran.  Please open up.”  Kieran waited patiently at the front door.  He hadn’t planned on driving up to her cottage tonight.  His logical side told him to give Faith time to cool down first.  His illogical side – the side that reminded him that she was his
croie
, said “Fuck that.”

The door opened part way.  Even in the muted light of the porch he could see that she’d been crying.

“May I come in?” he asked softly.

“Matt’s already gone up to bed.”

“That’s okay.  It’s you I wanted to talk to anyway.”

After a brief pause, she stepped back and opened the door wider so he could enter.

“You okay?” he asked. 

Her chin lifted.  “Of course.  Why wouldn’t I be?”

So it was going to be like that, was it?  “Faith,” he breathed.  “Talk to me.”

Faith took one look at him and exhaled.  She wasn’t happy about it, but she was smart enough to sense that he wasn’t above planting himself on her porch until she agreed to talk to him.

“Would you like some coffee?” she asked resignedly.  Her arms were crossed protectively in front of her, something she did when she felt a little uncertain, he’d noticed.  He didn’t like seeing her this way, especially not when he was around.  He wanted her to feel safe and secure in his presence.  The fact that she didn’t bugged him, and made him want to fix it.