Authors: Shanora Williams
But this is my new start and I might as well make the most of it. If I think about it too much, it won’t be fun. Another techno song plays loudly as I push through the crowd until I see him. I spin him around and he stares down at me, his eyes wide with a spark of confusion.
“I’m Natalie,” I breathe. “Dance with me?”
He tilts his head softly. “Nolan,” he murmurs as he leans in to place his lips against my ear. Unexpected heat drowns my entire body as he pulls back but grabs my hand to turn me around. The music seems to get louder, my mind is swimming, and here I am with a really sexy
Nolan
guy. I start to dance like I never have before. The drinks are really getting to me now. I’m not Sober Natalie that would usually tell this Nolan guy to fuck off or to leave me alone. Right now, my broken heart no longer matters. All that matters is if I’m having fun. And I am.
Nolan leans his head down as I tilt mine back, still grinding and moving with the music. My hips are glued between his as his hardness presses into me, turning me on even more. At least I can still make someone want me.
“What made you change your mind?” he asks, his voice buzzing against my ear again. He places his hands around my waist as I continue to move, twisting and dipping my hips with the bass of the music.
“Life’s too short.”
His chuckle rumbles from the heart of his chest. He then spins me around to face him. We both stop moving as we stare into one another’s eyes. “What do you say we go talk over some drinks?”
I nod then turn and stand on my toes to look over the crowd for Harper. I see her, dancing with some guy that I’m sure she doesn’t know. Nolan grips my hand and leads the way through the crowd. I bite back on a smile as we reach the stairs and he begins to walk up, still holding my hand. Why is this so exhilarating? I can’t believe I’ve actually caught his attention. This guy wants to chat and drink with
me
. I have to do this. I’m having too much fun to try and stop it and for once, I could give a shit less about Bryson. Bryson can kiss my ass.
Nolan continues to lead the way through various leather couches. The lights are still dim and I have to admit that I’m feeling every shot that I’ve taken. I’m getting lightheaded, giggly. All I want to do is dance, move with the rhythm of the beats. I shut my eyes briefly, enjoying the bass and letting it drum through my blood as I bob my head. It isn’t until Nolan has squeezed my hand that I realize that we are sitting.
“Are you okay?” he asks, chuckling.
I giggle. “You want me to be honest?”
“As honest as you want to be.”
“I’m beyond okay. I feel great. I feel
free
.”
“Am I making you feel that way already?” he teases. He leans in closer with his hand still glued to mine.
“Maybe.”
“A “
maybe
” is good enough with me when it’s coming from someone like you.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” I ask, trying to hold back on a few giggles.
“It means that you have thick skin. For a second, I felt like giving up. That’s never happened to me with any woman before.”
“So you’re saying that you pick up a lot of easy women from clubs?” I look him over this time, narrowing my eyes playfully.
“Not as many as you’re thinking, I’m sure.” He gives a charming smile and my heart stumbles over the next beat as another hot wave of heat works its way between my legs again.
“How do you do that?” I try to murmur to myself.
“Do what?” he asks quickly. I blink repetitively as I pull my hand away. If there is one side of being drunk that I don’t like, it’s the fact that I don’t hold my tongue. I always say what’s on my mind and do what I feel is right. I’m careless when I’m drunk. Nolan looks at me, his clear grey eyes confused. “What am I doing?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. When you smile I feel all girly and weird . . .,” I pause as he flashes another smile and once again I liquefy. “See!” I shriek over the music. “That!” I point out.
He chuckles again while holding his hands out innocently. “I’m not doing anything!” he pleads. “I’m just being myself.”
“Yourself?”
“Myself,” he says coolly, smirking. “Would you like another drink?”
“Sure,” I nod. He stands from the silver sofa quickly.
“I’ll be back. It will literally take me like two seconds. Please, just don’t leave.” His face grows serious and his eyes harden just a bit. He thinks I’m going to bail on him? Maybe he really is into me. But I don’t need him to be into me right now. I don’t need him to feel anything towards me. I just want a one-night-stand. I don’t want any feelings involved. I prepare my lips to speak on it but he’s already making his way towards the bar, his hips swinging in a manly, seductive way. Sighing, I slouch back against the leather sofa.
What have I gotten myself into?
Chapter Four
As soon as Nolan unlocks the door to his apartment, our lips lock and we barge in, not giving a damn about who sees. He groans, slamming the door shut behind us. He stumbles over a few things on the floor while reaching to pull my shirt over my head. Reaching to yank his up, I allow our lips to fall apart for only a few seconds before devouring them again as soon as his shirt is off. He stops abruptly as his body is forced to fall down and land on the sofa behind him. I climb on top of him, raking my fingers through his hair as he presses his fingers against my bare skin.
“Hey,” he breathes as I begin to kiss his neck.
I ignore him. Right now, I’ve never been so turned on. Outside of us making out, I really can’t think about anything else and that’s exactly how I want it to be. He switches rolls by picking my body up effortlessly to lay me down on his sofa. He dips down, placing his lips against mine before dragging feathery touches to my cheek, my ear, my neck. I moan, grazing my fingernails through the creases of his muscular back. I reach to unbutton his pants but he reaches down to stop my hand.
“Hey,” he says again, this time through a soft chuckle. “Are you sure about this?”
“Yes,” I whisper, nodding my head and still trying to unbutton his pants. His hand remains gripped around mine. I pull away and place my hands against his warm skin, deciding to breathe his fresh scent in instead. I pull him down against me and he grunts as he chuckles again. His lips hover above mine and I lean up, wanting to let our lips touch again, but he pulls back. “What are you doing?” I snap impatiently.
His face shines from the thick slits of moonlight coming in through the blinds of his balcony window. He smiles, his teeth flashing and causing my skin to melt against my bones. “I can’t, Natalie.”
What the hell?
Just seconds ago we were making out. He was enjoying this—every part of it. What man wouldn’t want to have sex with a drunk girl? Isn’t that what he kept buying me drinks for? I sit up quickly to pull away from him. “Why not?” I ask defensively. Am I really that hideous that he wanted to change his mind? Does my breath smell bad? Am I not perfect enough for him? I thought I had him in the bag.
“Don’t take it that way.” he perks himself up to sit down beside me. “I just feel something for you that I haven’t felt for anyone before.”
Oh no.
“What do you mean? You’ve literally just met me.” I inch away from him a bit, my face in a tight grimace.
“Exactly, I’ve just met you and, yet, I know nothing about you,” he says, shaking his head. “Look, if I sleep with you tonight, I know you will consider it a one-night-stand and never answer my calls in the future. You will regret meeting me. When I call, you will only think that all that I want is sex and I don’t want you thinking like that.”
What?
But that’s exactly what I was aiming for. No feelings, just sex. “So what are you saying?” I ask. “Because that’s kind of what I was going for.”
He tilts his head as his eyes narrow. “You only wanted
sex
from me?”
“Yeah,” I say through a forced, breathy laugh.
“You think that’s all that I wanted from you?”
“I was hoping that it was.”
Nodding his head, he sighs as he leans against the sofa. He folds his arms across his broad chest and faces forward, not bothering to look at me. I sit back with him, confused on what else to say. Why would he expect more from me? I don’t need more right now. I just need to be myself—to be free.
“I take it that someone has hurt you before. That’s the only reason that a girl would want “
just sex
”. If she’s been hurt or if she’s a prostitute.” He turns to look at me, his mystic eyes sparkling from the streaks of moonlight again. “Which one are you, Natalie?”
My heart pounds heavily as I look away from him. I squeeze my hands together, feeling the tears that are begging to be shed. But I won’t release them. I won’t let the memories of Bryson take over me and my emotions and ruin my night. I turn to face Nolan again whose eyes are soft and begging for an answer. “I shouldn’t have come here,” I mumble quickly before standing to snatch my shirt from the floor.
“Whoa—
what?
” Nolan stands from the sofa quickly to get to me. “What do you mean? You don’t have to leave, Natalie.”
“I know but you want more and I can’t give you more—” I break off as I tug my shirt over my head. I stare into Nolan’s eyes and a swarm of guilt overwhelms me. “Nolan, I can’t give you more right now. To be honest, all I wanted tonight was to forget about my problems—to just have fun with someone else for a change.”
“You can still have fun with me,” he pleads. “I can provide those feelings. You don’t have to leave.”
“But with that, there comes a price. If I give you more right now, I’ll possibly have to give you my heart and when I do, I won’t feel free anymore.”
His mouth opens again, as if he wants to speak, but after a moment it snaps shut. Although Nolan and I did hit it off tonight, I can’t do that to myself. He’s a great person, inside and out. Before we had ended up coming to his apartment, we went for a walk on the beach. Harper had ditched me for the really hot guy that had come with Nolan so we bailed from the club as well. I know I said things that I shouldn’t have that probably led to why he wants more with me but now I regret being so drunk and stupid. Now I regret chasing after him.
I grab for my shoes then head for the door. “You’re not from here, Natalie.” Sighing, he reaches for his keys that he’d tossed on the coffee table. “At least, let me take you home.”
I turn to face him with a slight nod.
He marches through the living room, still shirtless as he steps past and opens the door without eyeing me. He makes his way down the hall with his head down, raking his fingers through his hair before he meets the stairs. With a groan, I clutch my keys in my hand before shutting the door behind me.
Chapter Five
A banging noise startles me and I’m not sure if it’s my throbbing head or something else entirely. The banging thuds again and I groan, removing the white sheets from over my face. The sun blazes through the window, blinding me at first sight. I can’t believe I’d gotten that drunk last night. I can hardly remember a thing—well except the part where I’d pretty much destroyed Nolan’s heart.