GRIT (The Silver Nitrate Series Book 2) (22 page)

“She wants all of us, right? Not just me?” He hated how his heart beat a bit faster at the possibility that the shit was happening all over again.

“Yes…every single one of you. She spoke highly of all of you but she didn’t say what they were going to do, if anything. This is all second hand,” Silver said, shrugging, “from Courtney… but from the way the woman was looking, and paying attention, it seems at the very least, she was impressed.”

Javier and Zenith nodded in unison.

“Both of you jerks owe me money for all this running around I had to do and all of this damn stress!” Silver huffed. “All the work I had to do to make you two act right—ridiculous!” They all laughed at her outburst and he hugged Silver tight before placing a firm kiss on her cheek.

I don’t know what’s going to happen; it kind of doesn’t even matter. I needed my best friend back. I needed to play. And this made all the difference in the world…

He was certain he and Javier would be having an in depth conversation soon. What that would entail, he wasn’t certain, but at least the ice was broken now, and healing could begin. And the reality was simple; they needed one another. One of them without the other simply didn’t work, and like heat to metal, rock to roll, hip to hop, they created something picturesque… something he could drum a hard beat upon, and something Javier could sing out loud, hold a note to, so they could make the entire world around them come alive once again…

…A few days later

W
hen I was
a little boy, my grandfather told me that if you awake suddenly in the middle of the night, that means God is preparing something important for you and the angels want you to know it’s coming. I’m not sure what caused it, but the angels woke me up at four in the morning. Yet, what God prepared for me was something I sure as hell didn’t want… and I hated Him for it…

Zenith sat at Paw’s side, a solid grasp on his hand. The hospital smelled of ointments and pads with strong medicinal odors, soaked in the antiseptic that promised health, but could cure little of nothing. Paw mumbled incoherently every now and again, and then nodded off every so often. Earlier, Denise had called him, crying on the phone; he’d never seen or heard the woman become this emotional since he’d known her. He knew then; if a nurse, who sees death come and go most of her professional life, was falling apart, he couldn’t well venture into a land of denial, could he? No matter how tempting it would be. No, what Dr. Phillips had told him was correct, and the truth was simply the truth.

The nurse on duty re-entered the room and gently took Paw’s wrist. Tubes of oxygen ran through his nostrils like freeway traffic, making him appear like some strange alien, a science project of sorts. His long, silver hair with sporadic with jet black streaks stretched across the white, flat pillow, and his eyelids would move around every now and again, as if he were dreaming of something peaceful and wonderful. Zenith wondered how much of Paw was left inside, and how much was disconnecting, leaving, right before his eyes. Paw’s heart was failing. There simply was no turning back.

The doctor wasn’t certain if Paw only had a few weeks or a few months, but him lasting another year was highly unlikely. How ironic that Mawmaw’s heart had given out, too. Zenith drifted in his thoughts. The entire day had been horrific, surreal…

That morning, at 4:03 a.m., Zenith woke up. He got to his feet and immediately walked into Paw’s room after a dream about his grandmother. It was as if she were rousing him, telling him to go seek him out. He pushed the door wide open to find Paw unconscious, halfway slumped out of the bed and his mouth gaping. He could hear himself screaming, but he felt as if he were moving in slow motion, having an out of body experience. He called out, shrieking at the top of his lungs, shaking the man with a brute grip. Though he hated to act that way, desperation set in. He even slapped him one time across the face to try and rouse him, but the
old man wouldn’t budge.

He rushed to grab his cell phone and called 911, almost tripping over the rug in the old man’s room. Denise was due over to the house in about an hour to start her shift, so he simply sat there alone, panicking, needing answers and assurance that his Paw would be okay. He hugged the man, held him close while talking to the dispatcher, and giving updates on Paw’s condition every few seconds or so.

The ambulance soon arrived. He sat there in the back of the thing with the man, losing his mind, going a bit crazy. He hummed low as he held the old man’s hand, only soothing sounds and no word spoken. Every now and again, he felt a faint squeeze. He hoped and prayed it was a conscious act and not some involuntary reflex.

Once they arrived, they took Paw away, and he stood alone. He called Denise. Before he could finish letting her know that Paw was still breathing
but unconscious, she
blurted that she was on her way to the hospital, and hung up. He looked at the time, figuring Silver was up and getting ready for work. He called the woman, not even sure what he was going to say, how he’d say it, and if he could get through the damn call without falling apart.

She answered on the second ring.

“Hi, baby. Good morning.”

“Silver, I got some… bad news.” He unraveled immediately as he gripped the skin between his eyes and pinched it. “Paw is in a bad way. We’re at the hospital.”

“Oh God, no! What’s going on? Where you at? Crouse?”

“Yeah… on Irving… Not sure what’s happening yet.”

“I’ll be right there, baby… Hold tight, I’m coming.” And then she, too, ended the call.

He sat down, rocking himself, trying to convince his bones to continue to carry his own weight. His heart had grown so heavy. How would he be able to stand, let alone walk and talk? One tear, and then another, streaked down his face.

I should’ve spent more time with him…

I should’ve never let him go into that home in the first place…

I shouldn’t have been so disrespectful, no matter how much he got on my nerves sometimes…

I should’ve…

I should’ve…

I should’ve…

He sobbed loudly, so much that a nurse approached him with a box of Kleenex. The older white woman with short, reddish blond hair sat beside him, her light blue eyes friendly and her expression soft and mild. She tapped his back, and said nothing. That was all he needed… just a tissue, and a touch.

“Thank you,” he mumbled before blowing his nose.

“You’re welcome.” After a few minutes, she got up from her seat and vanished from his sight. He sighed, finally getting to his feet, and stretched his arms. His cell phone buzzed, alerting him to a new text.

SILVER:
I’m here… I just asked what floor Paw is on. Where are you?

ZENITH:
The main lobby on the fifth floor. They have him in an examination room.

SILVER:
Okay. Don’t move. Less than a minute away.

He sat back down and tried to clean himself up, to no avail. Soon, the woman burst through the doors, gripping what appeared to be a black and gray striped, crocheted tam hat in her hands. Her hair sprang out in wild, untamed, fuzzy plaits. She had on a long, black jacket, a wrinkled ‘Minions’ button down pajama top, and blue jeans. He smirked, a little amused as well as thankful for how the woman had literally left the house when she said she was without regard to her appearance, just simply wanting to be close to him and give comfort. When she ran to him and pulled him in her arms, he about lost his shit right then and there.

“Silver… if I lose him… if I lose him…nooo!”

“Ohhhh, baby! Come on now, come on now. It’s okay!” She held tight to him as his body went weak and the tears began to pour again. He sprawled his fingers against the fabric of her jacket, bunching it in a tight grip. His nose dribbled with snot and his eyes watered over and over again until the entire world became one big blur.

Wrapping an arm around his waist, she walked him back over to the lobby chairs pushed against the wall, painted the color of oatmeal. Some children’s show played on the television. They sat down next to one another, fingers locked, becoming one as they clung to each other. Then, he rested his head against her shoulder. He was exhausted. Not due to lack of sleep, but because his body had gone through such exertion. He felt as if he’d run a thousand miles.

Every now and again, she wiped one of his many tears away with a sideswipe of her free palm, and kissed his lips. Then, he began to shake.

“Have you eaten anything yet, Zenith?” she whispered.

He shook his head. “No. But I’m not hungry.”

“You’re going to need to eat something soon. I’ll get up and get us both coffee and a muffin in a little bit.”

He nodded, resting comfortably against her once more.

“You know, I knew… I knew one day Paw was going to die. We’re
all
going to die…” He sat up a bit straighter, his gaze fixed on their joined hands. “I mean, he’s up in age, he’s got some health problems. But somewhere deep inside of him, I wanted to believe that, as crazy as he’d become, he’d live forever…like, because he was acting so baby-like sometimes, this meant he had a new lease on life. That’s stupid, right? I’m so stupid!”

“Stop it, Zenith! You’re not stupid. You love him and you and he are friends… Of course you want him to live forever, don’t do this to yourself.” She ran a soothing hand down his arm as he looked off into space.

“He taught me everything I know.” Another tear fell, and another kiss landed against his cheek.

“He taught me… how to be… a man. He taught me… how to play the drums, how to shave. He even taught me how to put on a damn condom, using a banana.” He smiled sadly. “He taught me… how to take care of myself and be productive. He
raised
me… When Mawmaw died, it was just me and him, and he did a damn good job. I was fed, clothed, loved. He took me to some of his council meetings, encouraged me to be myself and not give a damn what anyone thought. He said I was talented, and I’d go somewhere in life. He was all I had, Silver…all I had…

“I could’ve ended up in foster care like so many others that lose their parents, but no, he took me in and he and Mawmaw treated me so well. And I couldn’t ask for much more. I shouldn’t want to keep him here with me. But I do! God,
please
don’t take my Paw away!!!” His mind and body were slipping, doing things he had no control over. “PLEASE! I’LL DO
ANY
THING, GOD! PLEASE GIVE ME MORE TIME!” he cried out. Silver grabbed him tight in her arms, brought his face down to her chest and rocked him, caressing the back of his head.

Rocked him just like Mawmaw used to do when he’d had a nightmare…

Rocked him just like Paw sometimes would while playing the drums, in order to put him to sleep…

Rocked him just like a baby… a sweet, newborn baby…

When Zenith awoke, it was over an hour later. A bit disoriented, he was hoping it had all been a bad dream, but when he saw Silver sitting there, her tam now on her head, her hands holding a cup of coffee, and Javier sitting by her side, the man’s eyes swollen and red, he realized that his nightmare was his new reality.