Getting Over It: Sapphire Falls Book Six (25 page)

“Why not, honey?” Kathy asked, her scowl gone and her tone gentler now.

Hailey swallowed hard. “I liked being his perfect woman.”

Kathy’s eyes lit with understanding. “And you think the ADHD and your anxiety makes you imperfect.”

“It does,” Hailey said. “Trust me. I mess things up all the time. Things that take someone else an hour to do can take me all afternoon.”

“We
all
mess things up,” Kathy said. “But you’ve been made to think that it makes you a bad person.”

“Ty doesn’t mess things up,” Hailey said. She smiled at Kathy. “Okay, here and there, but he’s the most organized person I’ve ever met. He likes things a certain way. He thinks everything through and plans it out. I know he comes across as this laid-back, spontaneous guy, but that’s an act. Underneath, he’s so on top of things.” She paused and shrugged. “If he learned local policy and got up-to-date on current issues, he could be a really good mayor.”

“Being a good mayor is about a lot more than being organized,” Kathy said. “It takes passion and love for the community.”

“Ty has that.”

“No one has it like you do,” Kathy said. “I’ve lived here all my life, and listening to you talk makes me love this place even more each time.”

Hailey felt a tiny heart flip at that, but she asked, “Listening to me tonight?”

“Anytime,” Kathy said. “You have an enthusiasm in your tone that always makes me look around and think this town really is amazing. And tonight, finding out what you really have to do to be so good at your job, makes me admire you all the more.”

Now her heart did a full three-sixty flip. Kathy Bennett had listened to her and been positively affected. Kathy admired
her
.

“It’s all stuff I
have
to do,” Hailey said, trying to resist the urge to throw her arms around Kathy again.

“No, honey. You want to. Or you wouldn’t put yourself through all of that,” Kathy said. “You love this town enough to triple-check things and come down in the middle of the night to make sure everything is done right. If you didn’t, you would have found another job that caused you a lot less stress and anxiety. I’m sure every time you have to prepare for a meeting or read a report or any of the other things that are difficult for you, you’re reminded all over again of Angela pointing out your shortcomings and that feeling of not being quite good enough. And I am so sorry you had to go through that growing up.”

Hailey pressed her lips together and nodded. Kathy had nailed it. There wasn’t a day that went by that Hailey wasn’t reminded she would never get it all right or do a great job. So she overcompensated and did four times the work. And never felt fully satisfied with it.

“And if Tyler makes you feel that way,” Kathy said, her eyebrows pulling together over blue eyes that looked exactly like her youngest son’s, “then you’re better off without him.”

Hailey stared at the other woman. She was admitting Ty might have done something wrong? And she thought Hailey would be better without him?

He’d openly adored her for fourteen years. He’d actually been a balm on the wounds that Angela’s constant criticism had caused.

That was why Hailey had kept stringing him along for so long. Because if anyone or anything made her feel unworthy or like a screw-up, all she had to do was bump into Ty in the hallway and he’d give her a big grin that said clearly he was happy to see her, and a compliment that would make her smile for hours.

The years she’d been away at college, she’d been eager to run into him in town over her breaks or weekends home. And the years after he went to Colorado and before they reconnected had been long and noticeably less happy than when she was seeing him from time to time.

She’d fallen easily into his bed—or onto his desk, more accurately—because she’d missed how much he liked her.

Hailey blew out a breath. “It’s not Ty,” she told his mother. “He’s never made me feel anything but like he thinks I’m perfect and amazing.”

“Good.” Kathy actually seemed truly relieved by that.

“But that’s made me really work on being that perfect woman,” Hailey said. “I’ll drive him crazy if we’re together all the time.”

“Your sticky notes haven’t driven him crazy yet,” Kathy pointed out. “Your need to triple-check everything hasn’t bothered him, right?”

“He doesn’t know about all of that. Or, he didn’t,” she said, realizing it was all blown wide open now. “He’s never seen my sticky notes.”

Kathy nodded. “And why is that?”

“I’ve hidden all of that from him. It’s silly, I suppose, but the things that keep me on track and organized—the planners and sticky notes and highlighters—are also constant reminders that I need all of that to be effective, and they make me feel bad. So I leave them behind when I visit Ty.”

“But you don’t need them when you’re with Ty?” Kathy asked.

“No. He takes care of everything when we’re together.”

Kathy didn’t respond at first. She just watched Hailey’s face.

The words replayed in her mind. Ty took care of everything when they were together. Which was true. She let go of a lot of her anxiety when she was with him because she knew he was in charge.

“I want to be his partner, not someone he needs to take care of,” she said softly.

“And that right there is probably the only mistake you’ve really made in all of this,” Kathy said.

“What is?”

“Not letting people take care of you.”

Hailey glanced at the three women standing behind Kathy watching their exchange. Adrianne, Phoebe and Lauren. They had always been there. They’d loved her in spite of her being scattered or bitchy.

And they had jumped in to take over the campaign for her. She hadn’t had to worry about a single detail at all. She’d shown up where they’d told her to and done what they’d told her to do. It had all worked beautifully.

But she’d never asked them for help with anything else.

“When people love you, they
want
to take care of you, Hailey,” Kathy told her. “Yes, Ty will want you to be an equal partner in the relationship. But being an equal partner doesn’t mean you don’t lean on the other person—it means that you’re there for them to lean on when they need it too.”

Hailey took a deep breath and then blew it out.

People didn’t lean on her, didn’t ask her for help outside the help that a mayor needed to give. Adrianne, Phoebe and Lauren hadn’t. Ty hadn’t.

And, yes, that had hurt. She would have gladly been there to visit him in the hospital or to help him out around his house when he’d first gone home.

She hadn’t given it a lot of thought until now, but thinking about Ty hobbling around his house, hurting, frustrated and scared and worried about his future in competition made her heart clench.

She definitely would have been there if he’d told her.

But he hadn’t.

“I need to go talk to him,” Hailey said. “Thank you so much,” she told Kathy. She stepped back and lifted her eyes to her friends. “Thank you all too.”

“Believe it or not,” Adrianne said. “You can be quite lovable.”

Hailey smiled and turned away before she started crying again. She wasn’t used to hearing that kind of stuff, and it was going to take some work—and some sessions with Lena, no doubt—to get over the knee-jerk urge to deny it.

But Ty Bennett had loved her for fourteen years. At least part of her. The idea of her.

Maybe she
could
be quite lovable.

Chapter Eight

Ty threw his cap against the kitchen table as he banged into his house. But the cap hitting the wood wasn’t nearly satisfying enough. He picked up a half-empty bottle of water and threw it against the lower cupboards across from him. That too was less than satisfying. So he stomped into the living room. But other than lamps and books, there wasn’t really much to throw around.

It wasn’t like he left plates and beer bottles lying around.

Now
that
would feel good—to heave a beer bottle against his stone fireplace.

But he wouldn’t do that. That would be a damned mess to clean up after.

But that didn’t mean he couldn’t drink one.

He stalked back into the kitchen, yanked the fridge door open and grabbed two. He put the lip of one cap against the counter and banged the top with his hand, flipping the bottle cap off and sending it skittering across the wood floor.

He tipped the beer back, swallowing three times before lowering it.

Then he thought back to the moment when he realized that he’d been having a fake relationship with a fake woman for the past almost four years.

Two beers weren’t going to be enough.

He grabbed a third from the fridge and headed back into the living room.

He stood in the middle of the room and turned a slow circle.

The living room he now owned because he’d packed up his imperfect, fucked-up life in Colorado to come to Sapphire Falls and have the perfect life with the perfect woman in the perfect town.

All of which was fake.

Well, the town wasn’t fake. But, hell, maybe it wasn’t perfect either. That was pure blasphemy to even
think
, of course. Everyone who lived here thought Sapphire Falls was as perfect a place a guy could be while still on earth. But what did he know about it? He knew Colorado had skiing and better enchiladas. That’s what he knew. He hadn’t lived here in eleven years, and he wouldn’t be here now if his knee hadn’t crapped out on him.

It was that thought that made him slump onto his couch and drain the rest of beer number one.

He’d had the perfect life. For a while.

Everything had been mapped out. He’d had a
plan
, dammit. He’d known what he was working for and had daily, weekly and monthly goals. He’d known how long he was going to compete, who his sponsors would be, when he would move into coaching instead and settle down.

The training center had been his plan, but just…not yet.

He’d played with the idea of putting the center here. But not yet.

He’d planned to get married and settle down and have a family. Just not yet.

But nothing was going according to that plan anymore.

He’d had an amazing career, been at the top of his game, on track for the gold. The fucking Olympic gold medal. His lifelong dream.

And he’d had Hailey. The perfect woman—gorgeous, smart, sharp, sassy. She didn’t let men close easily, didn’t date them for long, didn’t rearrange her schedule and travel eight hours to see anyone. Except him.
That
had felt perfect. Everything from her hair to her ass to her toes was perfect.

He’d had Bryan—coaching him and pushing him and telling him when he was slacking and when he wasn’t being realistic. Or when he was plain being an ass. Bryan definitely kept Ty’s jackass tendencies in check. That had been the perfect setup too. Lord knew, he needed someone keeping his jackass under control.

Now his knee was messed-up, his relationship was messed-up, Bryan was messed-up.

And the jackass who was never far from the surface was starting to rear his head a lot more regularly.

But Bryan
was
messed-up and couldn’t focus on Ty and tell him when he was veering way off course. Bryan couldn’t make Ty the center of his attention anymore. So he’d come to Sapphire Falls to Hailey.

He tipped his head back and stared at the ceiling.

Fuck, was that really what he’d done?

Yes. Ty couldn’t deny that was how it felt. He’d had his entourage in Colorado, and when the leader of the band was out of commission, it hadn’t been the same.

But when in Sapphire Falls, Hailey couldn’t revolve around him either.

And when had he become the ass who expected all of that anyway? About the time he’d moved to Colorado and no longer been
one
of the Bennett Boys, the younger brother of three great men who everyone liked.

He’d liked having the spotlight. There was no denying that.

So, yeah, he’d come to Sapphire Falls looking for a spotlight. Not even a big one. He’d wanted one woman to make him the center of her time, energy and attention like she did when she came to Colorado. Hailey not only relaxed and had fun in Colorado, but when she let him dictate every minute of their time together, that made him feel as though he was the center of her universe, and he really liked being there. That wasn’t realistic for Sapphire Falls. She was in charge here. Other things were priorities to her and had to have her attention. Her
full
attention, according to what she’d spilled tonight. She didn’t have time or energy for anything else—or
anyone
else—demanding attention in Sapphire Falls.

Denver had worked for them. It had worked
well
. Things had been perfect.

Ty pushed himself off the couch.

He needed to go to Colorado. He needed to see Bryan. He should have been checking in as it was, but he’d gotten wrapped up in his own stuff—typical—and hadn’t called in days. And now he could use an eight-hour drive alone to think things through.

But one thing was already clear.

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