Getting His Way: Sapphire Falls Book Seven (20 page)

He looked at her for a long moment, heat and electricity zapping back and forth between them.

“Yes,” he finally said. “Because watching your face the other night was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen, in part because of our long history and all the memories of all the times I’ve seen different looks on your face. And if I was fucking you from behind, I wouldn’t have been able to see that.”

Tess barely resisted squeezing her knees together. Okay, so
fucking
from Bryan was really hot.

She swallowed. “So yeah, beer pong. Good move.”

He nodded, as if the change in topics was totally expected. “Thanks. I’m getting more into the idea of changing things up, in the context of the familiar things I’ve always loved.”

Definitely not talking about beer pong.

“You’ve always loved the Lawn Yawn?” she asked lightly. Or tried to. It seemed like her chest was too tight to even take in much air.

Because if
fucking
was hot from Bryan, then
love
was equally so.

She was such a sucker.

“The Lawn Yawn is something I’ve appreciated more than I realized. Being gone and coming back makes you realize how much you depend on some things to always stay the same. When things start changing, you understand how much it means to count on certain things that you’ve taken for granted.”

Tess looked at him closely. Meeting his eyes was tough because she felt the impact all the way to her toes. But she saw more than heat and seduction in his eyes.

“Sapphire Falls was what you could count on after your accident,” she said. “Everything in your life changed suddenly, and you needed Sapphire Falls to be the same.”

“And you. You and Sapphire Falls go hand in hand for me.”

She could tell he meant that, and it made her heart flip, in spite of herself.

“So for a year and seven months, you just needed to assume everything was how it always was,” she said.

“Until I got on top of the other changes, in my body and routine and job.”

Tess nodded. That made sense. “And now?”

“Now I’m ready for the next change. The change in our relationship. Going from friends and crush to more.”

“And I—”

“I’m sorry I assumed you were exactly who I thought you were and that you were still waiting for me,” he interrupted. “Who I
assumed
you were because it was easier for me. I just
needed
you to be that girl as I adjusted. That girl helped me get through a lot of it.”

She frowned, her chest feeling tight. “How? I didn’t do anything.”

“You thought
I
could do anything,” he told her. “Or I assumed you thought I could do anything. And it helped me think it too. I’ve seen over and over how much it can matter just to have someone believing in you.”

“But—” Tess started, thinking that through. She loved the idea that she had somehow helped him through everything. “You must have suspected I wasn’t exactly who you thought, since you never really came to me with any of this.”

He nodded again. “Maybe. Or maybe I was worried about not being who
you
thought
I
was. I couldn’t lose godlike status with you while I was working my way back.”

She couldn’t help her smile. “I didn’t think you were godlike. Exactly.”

He lifted a brow. “Didn’t you?”

Tess propped a hand on her hip. “Ego intact.”

“Thanks to you.”

She took a breath. If she’d really had something to do with his recovery—that meant something. A lot. He’d changed her by inspiring her to try running. If she’d done the same for him…yeah, that was big. “And now you’re not worried about losing godlike status?”

“I’m back.” He gave her a grin. “I’m new and improved.”

“I may not survive,” she said drily.

Though she couldn’t argue. Bryan was still him—funny, optimistic, self-deprecating while totally confident. As if something had sanded the sharp point of his ego to a more subtle edge. It was still there, but it was as if he now knew he could back it up. His cockiness before the accident had partly been an act as he’d been figuring himself out. Now he knew himself.

“I’ll help you through it,” he told her. “Need you to survive it—and thrive. With me.”

Even after the other night, when she’d turned him down and given him a pep talk about finding someone else, he was here on her porch, wanting to be with her.

A trickle of sweat between her breasts suddenly brought her back to her messy post-run condition.

“I’ve changed some too,” she told him honestly.

He nodded. “I’m getting that.” He looked her up and down. “You’re jogging?”

There was something funny in his voice, but she couldn’t put her finger on it. She nodded. “Yeah.” Though the word
jog
made her cringe. That was far too easy a term for the way she’d tortured herself this morning. Thoughts of mountains and beaches had been on a constant reel…interspersed with pictures of Bryan.

But
yeah
was all she was going to say about that. She wasn’t ready to talk about her running with Bryan. Which was so crazy, considering she wouldn’t be doing any of it if it wasn’t for him.

“How long have you been running?”

How could she tell him without him assuming he was the reason?

Okay, it was a straightforward question. She could answer it casually, not give anything away and move on to another topic. “A little over two years.”

He hesitated. “How far did you go this morning?”

Crap. She paused again. She knew other people who ran for exercise and because they enjoyed it. Or so they could keep eating cupcakes or drinking beer. But most of them went no more than five miles and most did more like one or two.

She coughed and looked at the ground.

“Hey,” Bryan said gently. “It doesn’t matter. I’m just curious. No judgment.”

Her head came up. He was used to coaching high-level, serious athletes, and she could tell from the look he was giving her that he thought she was embarrassed to tell him because she hadn’t made it very far.

Tess straightened her spine and met his gaze. “Ten.”

He gave her a little confused frown. “Ten?”

“Miles

His eyes traveled over her again, more slowly this time. “Ten miles?”

“Yep.”

“How fast?”

She was proud of her pace. Very proud. She’d worked hard to get there. But the minute she told Bryan her time, he’d know that she’d been training. Hard.

Tess took a deep breath. “An hour and thirty-three minutes.”

She just couldn’t lie about that. She’d worked for every one of those minutes. And no one else, besides Ty, would understand that was a great pace.

Bryan looked surprised for a blink. But his expression quickly morphed into something else—almost anger.

“It appears there’s even more about you that I don’t know,” he said tightly.

She snorted at that. Which didn’t make him look
less
irritated.

“Really, Bryan?” she asked, in the face of his annoyance. “You really think there
aren’t
things you don’t know about me?”

“I thought you were a pretty open book, I guess.”

Tessa put a hand on her hip. And he’d counted on it. He’d just told her that. He’d wanted her to be the same. But he’d also just said he was okay with change in the midst of the familiar. Well, she was still her, but, yeah, new and improved too.

She needed water. And a shower. But she didn’t feel like they were done here. Or that she could just walk away this time. She’d done that a couple of times with him already. She’d made
him
walk two nights ago.

Her running wasn’t pathetic. Her twenty-plus years of loving this man who barely knew her was. And maybe starting running because of wanting to bond with him was. But what she was doing now was something she was proud of.

“I run,” she said. “A lot. I’m working up to fifty miles a week.”

That made him sit up. “Fifty?”

“Yes.”

“You’re training,” he said. It wasn’t a question.

“Yes.”

“For what?”

“The Colorado Marathon.”

Bryan gave her a little frown. “You already missed it.”

“Next year.”

He nodded, clearly processing that. “Have you done a half?”

He didn’t seem quite as stunned as she would have expected. She shook her head. “That’s the plan this year. There are a few I’d like to do.”

“Such as?”

Okay, fine. She could tell him all of this. Why not? He couldn’t change her mind. She had a plan, she was well into it, in fact, and she loved it. Bryan Murray was…everything she’d always wanted.
Before
she gotten a life of her own. She didn’t need to live vicariously through him anymore. She had done the training, she had—or would have—the money to enter and travel to the races, and to pay Jake Elliot to get her to the next level.

“There are a couple of Rock ’n’ Roll halves,” she said. “And an oceanfront run. And a covered-bridge half marathon in New England I’ve got on my list.”

He still looked irritated, but he also looked…amazed. “I had no idea you were into this.”

She nodded, not trusting what else she might confess.

“Is this what Denver is about?” he asked.

Tess pressed her lips together and nodded.

“You want to go out there to train for all of these.”

She swallowed. “Running the flat countryside here isn’t challenging me anymore,” she said. “I need to do more if I want to keep getting better.”

He nodded, though he did still seem amazed. “You’re really serious about this.”

“I am.”

Bryan stretched to his feet on the second step of her porch. From there, he was looking down on her from a significant height. He didn’t look happy. He didn’t look shocked either. And he wasn’t laughing at her. “If I still lived in Denver, would you have asked me to train you?” he asked.

For some reason, the phrase
train you
made her stomach flip. He didn’t mean it sexually. She knew that. But she couldn’t help but respond to the low timbre of his voice. And there was something about how he was watching her now.

Tess cleared her throat. “Maybe,” she fudged.

He shook his head. “I wouldn’t have let anyone else do it,” he said. “If I found out you were in Denver and hadn’t been in touch, and were letting someone else train you, I would have tracked you down and not left you alone until you let me do it.”

“You—” She had to clear her throat again.

There was something about Bryan being so insistent that made her stupid heart swell. And it
was
stupid. This was just about his ego. He was widely known as one of the best trainers. He would have definitely wanted to be involved with someone from Sapphire Falls. She’d like to think that
she
would have been the reason, but honestly, this was Bryan’s passion. He would have wanted to train anyone he personally knew.

“I guess I hadn’t thought about it,” she finally said. Flat-out lied, actually. She’d thought about it but had quickly dismissed it. She couldn’t have Bryan involved in her running—anymore than he already was. She needed to do this on her own. Well, with Jake. But that was different.

Bryan knew she was lying. She could tell. He didn’t laugh in her face, but he definitely looked plenty skeptical.

“No? I didn’t occur to you for one second in the process of thinking about going to Denver to train for marathons?” he asked.

“Well, okay, I might have thought about it once or twice. But I wasn’t ready for it when you were living there and then you…moved home.”

“Right. I moved home.” As if it was a simple life change—moving home like lots of people did.

But all of the real reasons he was here were right there between them.

“Right.”

“And now you’re ready? For the training?”

She nodded. “I will be. I, um—” She coughed.

She was completely nervous and excited about the news she’d gotten via email just that morning. She’d figured it would be a couple of weeks before she even heard back, but Jake Elliot’s answer had been in her inbox that morning. He had agreed to meet with her and discuss taking her on as a client. He wanted her to run the half marathon in Steamboat Springs in two weeks, and then they would meet while she was there.

Jake wanted to see what her time was in the half and where she placed before he accepted her. She kind of hated that. She wanted to improve compared to herself. But she understood that the race would be an objective measuring stick for Jake.

So she was going to Steamboat Springs. The same weekend the festival was supposed to start.

She
really
hated that.

“You what, Tess?” Bryan asked, his voice low.

She lifted her chin when she realized that she was focusing on the middle of his chest instead of meeting his eyes. “I’m running the Fourth of July half marathon in Steamboat and then I’m meeting with Jake Elliot.”