“I could eat.”
“All right then. What would you like? Denny’s or Friendly’s?”
“Going for the big time, huh?”
He laughed, and my breath caught when he leaned in and bumped his nose against my temple.
“Two of my favorite restaurants,” he informed me. “If there’s someplace else you’d like to go, I’m more than happy to take you there.”
“No,” I said, choking on my words. “Denny’s is fine.”
“All right then.” We made it to the car, and he opened the door for me, grinning brightly when I raised an eyebrow at him. “This is still a date, Anna.”
“You take all your dates to Denny’s?”
“No.” He chuckled. “You’re just special-er than the rest of them.”
I laughed and smacked his arm.
“Mm-hm. Sure.”
“I mean it! Half the time, we don’t make it to the restaurant.”
“So you just leave them there after the movie?”
“No. We get a bit distracted.”
“Distracted?”
He shifted uncomfortably.
“With . . . lips and—”
I held up my hand to stop him. “Got it. No more explanation is needed.” I looked down at the front seat of the car before eyeing him questionably. “Maybe a little more explanation is needed.”
“It was always the backseat.” He chuckled nervously.
“Well, as long as the front seat is safe.”
“Totally safe. I promise.”
“Okay then.”
I finally slid into the seat and placed my hands on my knees, looking up at him as he continued to stand there and look down at me.
“You take things like that so . . . easily.”
I leaned forward, splaying my hands out on my knees and shrugging.
“Should I freak out or something?”
“Most girls that I’ve taken on dates would’ve.”
“Well, I’m not most girls,” I said. “You’re going to have to get used to that.”
He licked his lips and crouched down, balancing on the balls of his feet. “I want to take you out again.”
“Really?”
“Really. Are you okay with that?”
“Uh . . .” I looked down at my lap and pressed my lips together. “Yeah, I guess so.”
“Are you sure? I’m not going to do a single thing to make you uncomfortable ever again, Anna.”
“I’m sure.” I barely hid my smile. “Thank-you.”
“All right.” He stood. “Denny’s, here we come.”
I laughed as he closed the door and leaned back in the seat, running my hands through my hair.
I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. I can do this. I will do this. Hell, I am doing this.
“So . . . ,” Evan said as he parked in front of my house and placed his hands in his lap, “I have plans with my family tomorrow but, uh, if you want to, you know, hang out later? I could . . . I’d like that.”
I blinked at him. He sounded nervous.
We’d spent the entire dinner learning new things about each other; he liked sci-fi novels and old black and white movies. Soft jazz relaxed him, which surprised me beyond words because it was my favorite type of music to listen to when I needed time to sort through everything in my life; and while he enjoyed going to parties sometimes, he mostly liked just hanging around his house.
He was kind of playful when he was relaxed, and he had a habit of throwing fries at me when I wasn’t looking at him. He even built a fort of sorts around his bacon cheeseburger with them. And he hadn’t been the least bit nervous since we’d indirectly talked about the action the back seat of his car had seen. At least, not that I’d noticed. So him fidgeting and staring down at his lap as he asked to see me tomorrow was not something that I really expected.
“Yeah, that’d be nice,” I said, looking down at my lap as well. “My dad will be golfing most of the day so . . . maybe I could make us something for dinner, too? If you want, I mean.”
“I’m completely up for that.”
I laughed as I saw him smirk in the dim light from the dashboard.
“Thank you for tonight,” I said, taking a deep breath and looking back down at my lap. “I really appreciate it.”
“You don’t have to thank me, Anna. I had a good time.”
I inspected the back of my hands. “Okay. So . . . I’ll see you tomorrow then.”
“Do you want me to call before I come over just in case you go out or something?” He laughed. “Christina mentioned something about seeing you tomorrow.”
“Ah.”
“I’ll call you.”
“You better.”
He grabbed my hand, bringing it up to his lips, and his eyes never looked away from mine the entire time as he pressed a gentle kiss against my knuckles.
“Promise.”
“Then I’ll talk to you tomorrow.”
“Okay.” I squeezed his hand before he let go and got out to open my door, my legs not altogether steady as I let him help me up.
I’d never had anyone open my door for me before. I’d never had anyone kiss my hand at the end of the night before. Hell, I’d never believed that Evan Drake would be the one to do any of that in the first place, and I’d never had the chance to really feel like maybe I wasn’t such a social outcast.
I jumped down the last of the stairs, bypassing my dad as I lunged for the door and looked at him over my shoulder. He held his hands up and walked back into the living room, mumbling something I was sure I didn’t want to hear to begin with.
It was Sunday, and last night when I’d talked to
him
on the phone, Evan had said that he would be coming over early the next morning so that we could hang out for the whole day. We would’ve done something on Saturday, as we’d planned, except that Christina had held me prisoner all day yesterday and wouldn’t let me out of her sight until her mother called her home at eight thirty.
“Hi,” I said to him as I pulled open the door.
“Hey.” He grinned, shoving his hands in his pockets. “How’s it going?”
“Not too bad, I guess. You?”
“Better now.”
I rolled my eyes and he laughed, pushing hair off my forehead. I turned to look as Dad yelled something at the television, and I laughed nervously and grabbed my keys.
“Going for a walk, Dad!” I yelled.
He grunted in response, and I slipped out the door.
“So, we’re walking?”
“Would you rather stay in the house while my father screams at the television?”
“We could always go up to your room . . .”
“Excuse you?”
“Not for . . . I didn’t mean . . .” He laughed nervously and cleared his throat, looking away. I tried not to laugh at him. “Just to hang out.”
“Not a good idea,” I said. “Come on.”
“Where are we going?”
I hopped down the porch stairs, rounded the side of the house, and waited for him at the fence that blocked off the backyard from the neighbors that didn’t exist.
“For a walk.”
“In your backyard?”
“Maybe.”
I pushed through the gate and looked over my shoulder to make sure that he was still following, and I smiled brightly as he closed the gate behind him.
“Is this a top secret thing, Anna?”
“It could be if you wanted it to.”
“You’re . . . kind of nuts, you know that?”
I reached the back end of the fence, waiting for him to catch up to me. I pulled back two of the wooden boards, motioning for him to go first.
He stared, then blinked. “We couldn’t have just walked around?”
“You wanted to know if it was a top secret mission. What’s a top secret mission without a secret passageway?”
“I . . . guess you have a point.” He laughed, bending down and crawling through the open boards.
I followed him, replacing the boards before standing by his side and motioning to a well-worn path that I hadn’t used for some time.
“Seriously, where are we going?”
“It’s just a shortcut to a place where I go when I need some time to myself.”
“Oh, well then.” He grabbed my hand, interlocked our fingers, and waved in front of us. “By all means.”
I laughed and then walked ahead of him, pulling him along with me. A few minutes and one hilarious episode later when Evan screamed like a little girl when he thought he saw a snake, we came upon the local playground. Kids were scattered on the jungle gym or the merry-go-round and ran around the slide to go down one more time, and their parents sat on the benches closest to the entrance to talk about the things their children did on a daily basis.
“You come here to think?”
I pulled him toward the entrance and led him over to a second set of unused swings in the back, letting go of his hand as I plopped into one and pushed myself off.
“There’s something about hanging around kids that clears my mind. Everything is so innocent with them.”
He plopped down into the swing next to me and gripped the chains as he looked around. Most of the kids had congregated around the wooden playhouse in the middle of the playground. They screamed and laughed as they ran from one end to the other using the swinging bridge.
“It was so much easier when we were kids, wasn’t it?”
“It sure was.” I swung as I watched a little blond-haired boy run in our direction as a redheaded girl chased him with her arms stretched out.
“I’m gonna kiss you!” she screeched, laughing.
“That’s gross! Girls have cooties!” he yelled back, ducking underneath a portion of the playhouse and catching her off-guard.
“Yeah. If that was our only problem, life would be a cakewalk.”
“I wonder where that expression came from,” he said, looking over at me. “Who really wants to walk on a cake?”
“Well, that’s like saying something is as easy as pie. Making pie from scratch is anything
but
easy.”
He laughed and leaned his forehead against the chains, digging his toe into the dirt below him and pushing himself back and forth.
“Have I always been an asshole to you?” he asked.
“You remember playing together when we were younger, don’t you?”
“Well, yeah, but I mean after that.”
I let my toes drag in the sand as I swung. “Yeah, you have.”
He reached over and grabbed my hand, once again linking our fingers together and squeezing.
“I haven’t made it easy for you, have I?”
“No,” I said, sitting up straight and squaring my shoulders. “But I’ve learned to deal with it as best I can.”
“You shouldn’t have to go through life like that.”
“I won’t have to in a few more months. I’ll be off to college and starting over. It’ll be different.”
“Where are you going?”
“NYU.”
“I applied there.”
“Have you heard anything back yet?”
He looked away, toeing the dirt a little more forcefully.
“Not yet.”
“What would you go for?”
“Journalism.”
“You want to be a writer?” I asked.
“I’d love to be some kind of columnist or feature writer for the
New York Times
.”
“That would be really cool.”
“What are you going for?”
“Child psychology.”
“You’d be good at that.”
I smiled and ducked my head, swinging a little more forcefully and pulling him with me. He laughed and picked up the pace until we were both forced to let go for fear we’d pull the other one completely off the swing. Finally, we both slowed down, dragging our feet in the sand as we came to a stop.
“Wow! You guys went high!”
It was the kids we’d seen running around before, only now they were holding hands and staring up at us with an expression close to awe. I laughed and hopped off the swing. There was a woman with fire-engine red hair, watching closely. I pointed to the little girl and then to the swing, indicating I wanted to push her on it, and she nodded, smiling at me.
“Come on,” I said to her, holding out my hand.
She grabbed my hand and abandoned the little boy, who was pouting and crossing his arms over his chest. I looked at Evan, and he jumped up, holding out his hand to the little boy, who smiled, bounced over to Evan, and grabbed his hand as well. I laughed and walked the short steps to the swing I’d just abandoned, picking the girl up to place her on the swing.
“Hold on tight, okay?”
She clapped enthusiastically and wound her little hands as far around the chains as possible, and I smiled as I walked behind her and placed my hands on her shoulders. I pushed her, and she squealed, kicking her legs out in front of her. I looked over to find Evan doing the same with the boy, who hadn’t quite gotten the hang of pumping his legs to go faster. He had the basic idea, but there was no rhythm, and he was going too fast for it to make much of a difference.
“What’s your name?” the little girl asked, tilting her head back to look up at me.
“Look straight ahead, sweetie, or you’ll fall backwards,” I instructed, placing my hands on her back and pushing her again. “My name’s Anna. What’s yours?”
“Ella. That’s Hunter.” She pointed to the little boy Evan was pushing before grabbing the chain again. “He’s my boyfriend.”
“Oh really?”
I stifled a laugh and saw Evan’s sly smile, the little boy making gagging noises.
“Yep! Is that guy yours? He has pretty hair.”
My eyes widened, and I looked back down at the top of her head, clearing my throat nervously and pushing her again.
“We’re just friends, sweetie.”
“Oh. Well . . . friends are good.”
“Yes, friends are very good.”
“Ella! Hunter! Come on! It’s time to go!”
I grabbed the chains and stopped the swing as she jumped off.
“Thanks, Anna! Bye!”
“Yeah, bye!” Hunter yelled as he chased after Ella.
I looked over at Evan to find him kicking the sand, and I plopped back down into my swing and pushed myself back and forth. He slowly did the same, staring straight ahead, as he slowly swung back and forth.
“You okay?” I asked, dragging the toe of my sneakers in the dirt and looking at him.
“Yeah.” He smiled at me. “I’m just thinking.”
“Anything you’re willing to share?”
“You’re good with kids, you know?”
Looking down at my lap, I said, “Thanks. I love kids.”
“I never really thought that I wanted kids.”
“No?”
He stared across the park as he pushed himself off the ground and started swinging in earnest. “Too much responsibility . . . not being able to give them back to their parents when they start crying and all.” He chuckled, looking over at me. “But maybe it wouldn’t be so bad after all.”
“You’ve just gotta find the right person.” I shrugged and looked away, staring down at my feet as I pushed myself back. “Anything is possible then.”
“You’re a romantic, huh?”
“Maybe.” I glanced at him and said, “Have to have something to believe in, right?”
He abruptly stopped swinging; I followed suit as he stood stiffly and walked behind me. I tensed, closed my eyes tightly, and waited for the worst to happen. His arms slid around my shoulders before I felt his breath on my ear as he bent down. I relaxed, opening my eyes and cautiously leaning back into him.
“I hope one day that you’ll trust me, Anna,” he whispered into my ear, his arms tightening around my shoulders. “I know it’s not easy.”
“I
am
trying.”
“I know. So am I.”
“I know that, too.”
He kissed my cheek before standing, and I blushed, blinking at my feet before I felt his hands on my back, slowly pushing me forward.
“Tell me something.”
“Like what?”
I crossed my ankles as he continued to push me.
“Ever snuck out before?”
“No,” I snorted. “You?”
“All the time.”
“Rebel.”
“Maybe. Ever gotten drunk?”
“Once with Christina and Vince at her house when we were in ninth grade.”
“Now who’s the rebel?”
“Still you,” I said, trying to hide the smile as he pushed me a little higher. “Ever not been able to talk your way out of something?”
“Only with my mom.” He chuckled. “It’s like she can see through me and read my mind. Ever been in love?”
“No.” I sighed. “How about you?”
“I thought I was once,” he said. “Turned out that not everything ends the way it’s supposed to.”
“What happened?”
“She broke up with me for someone else.”
“Who was it?”
“She moved away a few months after.”
I dug my heels into the dirt and turned to look at him. There was only one person that he could possibly be talking about. They had been the power couple, the king and queen of Collins Point High during freshman year until out of the blue, she showed up at school holding hands with Dane McKinley, a senior and star of the basketball team.
“Laura Crest?”