Forsaking All Others (From This Day Forward Book 2) (4 page)

Seeing him did more than cut my heart. It made ribbons out of it. With my head down, I mindlessly thumb through a women’s magazine, silently willing the tears to stop.

I know it’s stupid, but for a split second, when I saw him standing there—I thought he was there for me. And in that moment, I was ready to throw myself on him and tell him the divorce papers were a mistake. That wouldn’t have been a desperate move…nope, not one bit. My inner romantic is so worked up, she’s breathing into a paper bag.

“Elizabeth Greene?”

I look up at the nurse who is scanning the crowded waiting room, obviously searching for me.

I grab my purse and try to put thoughts of hooking up with my soon-to-be ex-husband out of my head.
What the hell is wrong with me?

Once we arrive in the back, the nurse has me set my things down so she can check my weight. I wince, afraid to see how much I’ve already gained. The number I see shocks me though. I’ve lost weight, a lot of it. I’m fifteen pounds lighter than I was in the hospital right after the wreck.

The nurse enters the information into her computer, seemingly unconcerned by this development.

I clear my throat, “Um, excuse me? Is this scale accurate? Because my weight is a lot lower than normal and with me being,” I make a gesture of a round belly. I don’t know why I’m now unable to say the word “pregnant.”

She looks bemused, “Have you been experiencing a lot of morning sickness?”

“You mean, ‘all day sickness?’ Yeah, lots of that happening over here.”

She laughs, “I’ll let Dr. Harper know. She might be able to prescribe you something to help alleviate some of that.”

After going over any questions I might have for Dr. Harper, she hands me a gown and leaves the room so that I can change. I change and try to get comfortable on the exam table. The paper lining on the table crinkles under me as I try to get comfortable. It’s then that I fully notice the pictures lining the wall in front of me. Babies.

The babies all appear to be newborns and they are in the most adorable poses. One is dressed like a little fairy, she’s even got a wand in her hand. Another is wearing a teeny-tiny football jersey and is sleeping inside a football helmet. I find that I’ve been absentmindedly stroking my stomach while lost in thoughts of infant photography.
I need the name of this photographer.
An emotion I don’t quite recognize comes over me just as Dr. Harper comes in.

“Good mornin’ Elizabeth, and congratulations!”

“So, it’s real. I’m really pregnant?” I smile as I say the words.

“Yes ma’am. The lab work and urine sample both confirmed that you are indeed pregnant. Your hCG levels place you around seven to eight weeks, but I’m going to confirm that with an ultrasound.”

“You mean I’ll get to see my baby today?”

“I’m going to do a pelvic exam and then we’ll see what’s going on.”

She does her exam, while asking me questions regarding diseases that may run in our family. I answer her questions as best I can, but I’ll have to figure out a way to find out more from David’s side of the family.

She finishes up and a nurse wheels a cart into the room and begins placing what looks like a condom on the wand connected to the machine. I am trying to figure out why they need a condom on something they’re putting on my belly when Dr. Harper sees my face.

“Elizabeth, you’re not far enough along for us to do a normal ultrasound on you, so we’re going to do a transvaginal one instead.”

My eyes must be as wide as saucers, “Okay, great,” I manage to squeak out.

There is so much I don’t know about all of this. The nurse squirts lube onto the wand and has me lie back. I focus on the little screen and not the fact that the most action I’ve had in six weeks is coming to me courtesy of an ultrasound wand.

The black and white screen is empty one second and then there it is. It looks like a gummy bear and it’s moving around like crazy. There’s also a sound like a washer on spin cycle.

Dr. Harper smiles at me, “You hear your baby’s heartbeat? We should be able to get it with the Doppler at your next visit.”

I nod and place my hand over my mouth, completely overcome with emotion at the sweet little creature grooving on the monitor. The thought that David is in a nearby exam room, doing this very same thing with Jess, brings me back to reality.

They print out pictures for me to take home and slightly dazed, I head for the elevators after making my next appointment. If I were paying more attention, I wouldn’t have run smack dab into my former best friend.

I apologize for bumping into the woman before realizing it’s Jess. She tries to hug me and I step to the side, avoiding her at all costs.

“Lizzie. God, I am so sorry.” Gone is the cool, calm, and collected Jess who couldn’t be bothered to walk over to me in the waiting room. In her place is a nervous and weepy mess. I think of that song by Gotye and realize how true his words were in that song. She is nothing more than somebody I used to know.

I walk over to the other elevator and push the down arrow, willing the doors to open soon. Never mind that it’s already lit up. Maybe if I push it a few more times, it’ll come quicker. She places her hand on my arm and I tense up, ready to lay into her.
Stress isn’t good for the baby.
I take a deep breath and try to clear my mind. It’s funny, but I haven’t had a panic attack since that night, and I refuse to have one in front of the elevators at my doctor’s office.

I keep my voice calm, “Not here, Jess. I have nothing to say to you. You got him—and I’d really appreciate it if you could just leave me the fuck alone now.”

She starts openly weeping again, but I refuse to look at her, instead focusing on the metallic elevator doors.

Her voice cuts through the tears, “I never wanted to hurt you. I didn’t want it to affect us. I just—“

Forgetting that I was not going to engage her, I turn towards her and unleash my fury. “You just what, Jess? Thought you and I could remain friends while you slept with him? We aren’t sister wives—this isn’t some normal thing between friends!”

The elevator doors pop open at that moment and as I step in, I see quite a few shocked faces staring back. I hit the button to close the doors and focus on my breathing again. “Sorry, little bean,” I rub my stomach. I need to remain stress free and probably eat more vegetables while I’m at it—growing a little human is hard work.

I’ve just made it to my car when my “sister wives” comment hits me and I cannot help myself, I double over in laughter. My head against the driver side window, I laugh until I’m crying. These pregnancy hormones are out of control right now.

“Elizabeth.”

His voice effectively stops any sort of outburst from me.

I turn to look at him, standing with his hands in his pockets, waiting for me to say something.

“Landon—what are you doing here?”

He gestures toward the large building behind me, “I had an appointment. What are you doing here?”

“Same, actually.”

“You seem upset. Bad news?”

He’s fishing for information and while a part of me remembers how caring he was toward me when David wasn’t around, a larger part of me is very much on guard.

“No—nothing like that. Just being emotional.” I wave my hand as I speak as though that will better illustrate my point.

He runs his hand through his hair, seemingly at a loss for words. I’ve just opened the door when he regains it. “Coffee. I mean—do you want to grab coffee? There’s a place nearby.”

The thought of trying to ingest anything at the moment makes my stomach turn. “I’ve actually got to get back to work. Maybe another time.”

He nods sadly and I turn back toward my car.

“I saw, Elizabeth.”

I freeze, all too aware of the sonogram pictures in my purse.
How did he find out?

Seeing my wide eyes, he clarifies, ‘It was in the paper.”

My heart is pounding so hard, I fear it may come right out of my chest. “It was in the paper? Why?”

“It’s public record.” He’s looking at me like I’ve lost my head.

Public record. Public recor—the divorce.

I let out a breath, “The divorce. You’re talking about the divorce.”

“What else would I be talking about?”

I laugh shakily.
Think, Elizabeth, think.
“I thought you meant the whole ‘me having an affair while he was having an affair’ thing.”

He laughs easily, “I don’t think that makes the paper unless you’re a celebrity. I thought you might want a friend to talk to during this time.”

I suddenly became interested in asphalt underneath my feet.

“Landon—”

He interrupts me, “Look, I get it.  You’ve got a lot to sort through,” He touches my arm, “Just know that I’m going to be here—waiting for you whenever you’re ready.”

I mutter a quick thanks before jumping into my car.
Why am I so awkward around him?

I’ve been sitting in my truck for the last half hour, making calls and answering emails. I’ve tried to do anything, but think about what just went down with Jess. I feel like I’m fucking up at every turn. I’ve just finished up a call on my current job site when I see Beth come out of the medical building.

The breeze catches the little strands of her hair that aren’t pinned up, and I’m fucking mesmerized by it. I had to park in the lot across the street so I’ve got a great vantage point. I can see her and make sure she gets to her car safely, but she can’t see me.

I watch as she gets to her SUV and dissolves into full-blown laughter. She’s leaning her head against the window and I wonder what the hell happened in there. I’m just as thrown when her laughter suddenly switches over to tears and without a thought, I’m out of my truck headed her way when Landon pops up behind her.

What the fuck? Is he stalking her?

I’m ready to interrupt when I see her facial expression change.
She’s afraid of him.
I know my wife, inside and out, and her eyes always give her thoughts away. I don’t want to rush in to the situation and face her wrath, but I want to be nearby in case she needs me.

They continue talking for a few minutes before Beth climbs into her SUV and leaves. Landon watches her drive away before heading to his vehicle. I’m tempted to confront him, but I need to be patient. I’m going to need concrete evidence before taking him down.

I make it through the workday, in spite of the thoughts of Beth spinning in my head. I’ve yet to discuss the divorce with her, but as I leave the last jobsite, I think that conversation is overdue. I’m not a passive man, so I’ll be damned if I just cave and agree to divorce. She and I messed up—there’s got to be a way that we can come back from it though. Blake Shelton comes on the radio and it damn near breaks me. It’s like he’s singing about the situation I’m in, if I’d done more to show her how important she was to me, maybe she wouldn’t be gone.

Once I get to the house, I try to get my emotions under control. I can’t go in there guns blazing and demand that she take me back. I’ll be out on my ass before I even get the words out. No, I can’t lose my temper. I did that in those first few weeks after she kicked me out and I got a door to the face each time.

I knock on the front door of my own house and I find it slightly amusing that my heart is beating just as fast as the first time I went to pick her up for a date. She still has this effect on me, I just took it for granted before.

Beth opens the front door and I’m blown away just by the sight of her. Her unruly hair is finally down and she’s just in a tank top and shorts.
I want her so badly.

“David? What are you doing here?”

“I needed to see you. We didn’t get a chance to discuss much earlier. I want to talk about the divorce.” I’ve succeeded in keeping my voice calm, even though the anger is bubbling just under the surface.

“Okay.” She gives me a resigned look and holds the door open for me to come in. She isn’t throwing it shut in my face, so I’d say we’re making progress.

I look around our house and notice boxes sitting on almost every available surface. “What the hell is this?” I gesture at them with my hand. Okay, anger is definitely becoming more pronounced.

She looks up at me from where she’s sitting in her chair. Her face is the picture of innocence, but her eyes blaze at my tone. “I’m moving, David.”

I sigh, “Is this because of the divorce papers, because I’m not fucking signing them. We were good together and we could be good together again.”

She laughs and it takes me by surprise. “Good together? You mean when we were cheating on each other? Is that the definition of a good marriage to you? Geez, you think that’s how it was for your parents?” The venom in her words is enough to bring the rage I feel at this entire situation to the forefront.

I snarl, “Do not bring my parents into this. Answer the damn question. Why are you moving?”

She jumps up off the chair and comes to stand directly in front of me. Looks like I just lit her fuse.
So much for a productive conversation.

“Look around you, David. There are reminders of us everywhere in this house. I know that you’re living in a hotel right now—it’s just not right. Not when you’re expecting a baby with her,” her face puckers as she says the word ‘baby’ and I’m afraid she’s going to be sick, but she stoically continues, “I’m thinking of moving in with Lauren, she needs a roommate. I thought you’d want to be a family, and I know Jess won’t stand for living anywhere but here.”

“Fuck Jess!” I don’t mean to shout the words but I do.

Beth leans over, clutching her knees, her shoulders heaving. I’ve done it. Now, she’s crying. I place my hand on her shoulder just as she pops her head up, I narrowly avoid getting my nose broken. She’s got tears running down her face, but she is laughing! Laughing at what, I have no idea. “What’s so funny?”

She catches her breath long enough to enlighten me. “Fuck Jess? Didn’t you already do that, David?”

She immediately begins wheezing with laughter again and I worry she’s lost it. All the stress from the accident and finding out about the infidelity has done it. She’s snapped.

“Are you okay, Beth?”

She straightens up, wiping tears away with the back of her hand. “I’m fine, David. I’m just trying to add some humor to all of this.”

I take a step toward her and she backs up. I continue doing so until her back hits the living room wall. I cage her in, my arms on either side of her head. “Beth, none of this is funny—” I plan to say more, but her heaving chest and wide eyes take me under. She’s staring up at me, waiting to see what I do next.

I lean down and press my lips to hers. She’s so soft and sweet. I nip at her lower lip, drawing her in further. I’m a selfish bastard, I know that. I should let her go and maybe later, once I’ve had a few drinks, I’ll agree to do just that. At this moment though, I’m going to savor the feel and taste of her.

I expect her to stop me when she brings her hands up, but she surprises me. Her hands lock around my waist, pulling me even closer to her.
If she’s gone mad, I don’t know that I want her to regain sanity.
My tongue makes its way inside her sweet mouth and I feel that I am quickly losing control.

I pull away reluctantly, “Beth—I gotta stop,” her face falls, “Baby, if we don’t stop, I’m going to pick you up and we’re going to bed. Believe me, I’d love nothing more, but I want us to talk. I need to know why you filed.”

Beth bites her bottom lip, which is swollen from my assault on her mouth. “David, I didn’t know what else to do. We hurt each other badly and obviously we weren’t enough for each other,” she hesitates and her voice is almost too quiet to hear, “More than that though—I can’t help raise a child that you and Jess made. It would be this forever reminder every time I looked at him or her.”

Her words crush me. I knew the situation would be hard to manage, but I never looked at it from her standpoint. Raising a child that was the product of infidelity—I don’t know that a saint would take that on. I run my hands over my eyes, as if that will give me a clear mind. Instead, it dredges up anger again.

“What about Landon? I saw you two today in the parking lot. Are you going to start seeing him?”

She glares at me, “First of all, that’s not any of your concern and secondly, why were you staking out the office parking lot?”

“I wasn’t staking out the parking lot, but I do find it interesting that Landon just so happened to be there today. I don’t trust the guy. I think he’s stalking you.”

She laughs without humor, “That’s interesting, coming from the guy who was camped out in the same parking lot, watching me.”

“I saw the way he looked at you, Beth. Jesus, you think I’m just going to consent to a divorce so you’ll be free to go to him?”

“You have no right to contest this, David. No right!”

The anger has now taken over, “That’s where you’re wrong. I have every goddamn right. You are my wife! I fucked up, I’m well aware, but I’ll be damned if I let you go without a fight!”

She’s crying now and I feel like the world’s biggest asshole. Her voice is just above a whisper due to her tears, “Please, David. Please don’t make me relive it. I don’t want to see Jess every time I look at you—just like you don’t want to look at me and see Landon. We’re poison to each other, you and me.”

Her words are like a knife to my chest. “Beth, I love you. I love you so damn much and I’m not signing the papers. I’ve got sixty days, the way I see it. Sixty days to make you see what a mistake this is.”

She sinks down the wall until she’s sitting, “You’re really going to fight me? You want to go before a judge to settle this?”

I nod, “If that’s what it takes. In the meantime, be prepared to see a lot of me, baby. Because I’m not going anywhere.”

“Get out, David.”

I push the anger down and try to lighten the mood, “So, I guess you’re taking a raincheck on sex tonight or is that still on the table?”

Her mouth falls open in shock and I grin at her, even though smiling is the last thing I feel like doing. “Should I alert the media that I’ve rendered Beth Greene speechless?”

She frowns at me, but her gaze is heated and I know I’ve gotten through to her, at least physically. “Good night, David. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on your way out.”

When I get back to the hotel, I immediately reach for the bottle of Pendleton. I’m ready to get lost in the bottle when I think of her words.
I’ve got to change
. I can’t numb myself to this anymore. As much as it’s going to suck, I need sobriety to fix all of this and get her back. I dump the rest of the bottle down the bathroom sink and prepare for the hangover from fucking hell.