Authors: Lyn Lowe
Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #Science Fiction & Fantasy, #Fantasy, #Epic
Part Three:
The Soldier’s Price
“Only when he is
Lost
Will he
find
Time
And there he will
Find his way forward.
Where he walks
Even the greatest
Will catch fire.”
-
Excerpt from “The Book of Endings
Sparrowfall Dynasty 44
6
2
1
st
year After the Fall
He wasn’t in the garden.
He knew that first, before the pain, before the horror, before the cold anger and mind-numbing humiliation. It was the mystery he clung to, when all those other things rolled through him. It was something to occupy his mind.
It was dim, and his eyes wouldn’t open all the way, so it was difficult to make out details that might give his location away. Kaie was fairly certain that the wall he could see was made of the strange stone, not of the white stuff of the manse. He was certain that he wasn’t on his bedroll. He was too high from the floor, for starters, and Kaie knew the press of the stone against the thin material quite well. Whatever he was laying on now lacked all of that support that came from stone underneath. He found he didn’t like the sensation of hanging over open air.
He wasn’t naked. Not anymore. Now he was in one of the white gowns all the servants wore. It was as soft and thin as a spider’s web, and every bit as cool as it looked.
He tried to sit, but discovered he was tied down. Panic surged through him. He jerked around desperately, a scream ripping loose from his raw throat. Whatever he was laying on tipped over and he landed hard. Sharp, blinding pain stole the air from his lungs.
There was gasp of surprise from somewhere on the left, and the shuffling of feet. Then he lost hold of consciousness.
When Kaie woke up again, the room was light and stifling. He still couldn’t open his eyes all the way. There was a thin coat of gunk clinging to the eyelashes of his right eye that made it hard to see.
He was upright again, though still tied to whatever he was lying on. It took some effort, but he battled down the panic this time. He needed to find out where he was. Escape would be impossible otherwise.
“Hello?”
He heard more of the shuffling, this time from the right side, and a spattering of mutters that he couldn’t make out. “Is someone there?”
A second later, a head of dark brown hair appeared over top of him. Kaie could make out general features – dark-colored eyes, pale lips – but his vision was too clouded to pick out any specifics. It wasn’t until the sigh of relief that he was certain it belonged to a woman.
“You’re awake.”
An automatic attempt to wipe his eyes clear of the goop that obstructed it caused another sharp pain in his side. Kaie remembered teeth there, like the ones on his shoulder, chewing. He blocked the image out as quickly as it came. “Do I have to be?”
His intention was to ask for some herb or medicine that would send him back into the pain-free darkness. Her snort implied she thought he was trying to be funny. Kaie lacked the energy to correct her.
“I’m sorry for the rope.” A cool hand dropped on his forehead. The touch made him flinch, but the chill was too soothing for him to push away. For a moment, Kaie closed his eyes and enjoyed the sensation. “You feel out of your cot several times. You were badly hurt, and I was worried you’d make it worse. I can untie you now, if you promise to be still.”
“Okay,” he agreed easily.
She removed her hand from his head, pausing to press the back of it against his cheek for just a moment,
then
worked on the ropes holding him down. After a moment, he felt them fall away. Kaie took a deep breath of relief, the action causing a fresh twinge of pain in his nose that brought tears to his eyes.
“Easy!” She admonished. “Your nose was broken. You should try to breathe through your mouth for a while.”
“Okay,” he agreed again, a little less enthusiastically this time.
“Would you mind if I take a look at your side? I want to see how it’s healing.”
“Not quickly,” Kaie informed her. When she didn’t move, and he felt her eyes locked on his face, he realized she was still waiting for permission. He almost laughed. She was clearly no stranger to his injuries. No doubt, she treated him while he slept, without his permission even. It seemed absurd that she should need it now. “Yeah, go ahead.”
She made a sound of approval – he thought it was approval – and moved to the left side of the cot. She tugged up his gown carefully. He flinched again, and nearly bolted as his thin protection was pulled away, but the soothing noises she made kept him in place. After a moment, he felt something peeling up off his side. Kaie strained to get his shoulders up, not wanting to disturb her by moving too much, but curious to see what she was doing to him.
His side was wrapped in
a dark
brown linen. She was lifting it off him slowly, as if she expected something underneath to jump out. Kaie caught sight of some sort of greenish paste on the underside of the linen and on his skin. Every new bit of exposed flesh brought a sound from her, one she tried to muffle. Kaie wondered if he wasn’t better off not being able to see clearly.
“This is starting to heal,” she murmured. He didn’t miss the hitch in her voice. “I was worried it would turn. Bites do, more often than not. But I think the danger is mostly past. You’ll scar, but I don’t think it will kill you.”
“I guess that’s something.” Kaie would rather she cut the whole thing out of him. He would prefer the gaping hole and risk of death than carrying the marks of the man’s teeth in him for the rest of his life. But he couldn’t explain that to her. She was already wrapping the mess back up.
When that was done, she moved on to his left arm. It was wrapped too, and splinted. He remembered a boot, heavy and covered in dust, pressing down until there was a deafening snap. Then Silvertongue’s hissing laughter as he screamed.
“This is going to be trouble,” the woman said softly. “It wasn’t a clean break. I wanted to amputate, but the Ninth Rit wouldn’t allow it. It’s setting better than I expected, but I don’t know if it will ever be the same. I suppose we’ll have to wait and see.”
“You’re a healer.” It was a stupid observation, and he felt stupid saying it out loud, but it was the only thing that came to mind to banish the reaction to that news.
She made a scoffing noise as she wrapped his arm up again. “Healers spew nonsense about the moons and auras. They’re inconsistent in their care, at best. I use medicine and science. I’m a doctor.”
“I’ve never met a doctor before.”
She placed a hand on either of his shoulders and pushed him down gently. Panic surged through him. He jerked away from her touch, and nearly shoved her before Kaie came back to himself. “Sorry,” he murmured.
She patted his other arm lightly. “You’ve had a rough time. I’ll let it slide. But I do need you to lie down.”
Kaie hesitated a moment, not really sure why he was so reluctant. This woman was clearly not intending to hurt him. But his nerves were raw and his heart was pounding. She stood over him, waiting patiently. After a few deep breaths, he did as she asked. He was tensed, ready to roll out of his cot, but he let her do her work.
Her fingers brushed across his nose, sending a fire of pain through his face, but they quickly moved to his cheeks. Again, he flinched at the touch, though this time it he could at least blame it on the pain.
“Do you want any more ointment for your eyes?”
Kaie scowled, regretting the expression even before he finished it. “Is that why I can’t see?”
She chuckled. “I believe it might be part of the problem, yes. Though I doubt the black eyes are helping much either. I can remove it.
If you promise to quit rubbing at them.”
“I guess I can do that,” Kaie conceded, just as eager to get her away as he was to be able to see clearly again. She patted his cheek, almost affectionately,
then
reached down to the side of the cot. A second later, she pressed a cold wet cloth to his temple. She stopped for a
moment, almost like she was waiting for him to object, then she dragged it over his right eye.
The cold was so nice, Kaie couldn’t help the sigh. She wiped it gently,
then
moved to the other eye. He sighed again, relieved to be free of pain he only noticed now that it was fading.
Kaie opened his eyes slowly. Details came into focus. The doctor, a rather plain looking woman with brown eyes and a pink stripe of sunburn across the bridge of her nose, smiled down at him. He returned the expression out of habit.
“I’m in the hospital, right? The house the Huduku gave us for treating our sick and wounded?”
She nodded and tucked a strand of her long brown hair behind her ear, twisting the end around her finger just a bit. The gesture made her seem very young.
“How long have I been here?”
“About four days. This will be the fifth. Your eyes are much better. I can actually see them now. They’re pretty. I’ve never seen any that dark a green before.”
“Uh, thanks.” Four days.
Five.
All the things the man did to him left him unconscious for five days.
His stomach lurched.
Kaie his head away from the doctor, to the other side of the cot, just in time to vomit all over the floor.
Cool fingers ran through his hair. They kept stroking as a broken sob followed the bile. Burning tears spilled from his pretty green eyes, and more sobs echoed the first. He tried to stop, to hold them back, but they came out regardless.
“Shh,” she murmured. “This was the worst of it. The rest, it’s healed. Do you understand? I kept you asleep for the worst of it, and now that’s passed. There won’t be any other scaring, no loss of feeling. The bruises are already fading. I can send you back to the Ninth Rit this evening.”
“No! Please, let me stay here,” he pleaded between sobs.
She stopped stroking his head for just a minute, let out a slow sigh,
then
resumed again. “I know he hurt you bad this time.
Worse than anyone should be hurt.
But I have to send you back. Besides, you’ve been with him for two years and you’ve never ended up here before. So he’s not the worst. He might not hurt you again.”
He rubbed at his eyes, despite his promise not to, and sniffled as he wiped the snot from his nose on the back of his hand. Then he turned back over again so that he could see her face. More importantly, so that she could see his. “He will,” Kaie said. “I promise you, he will.”
Her eyes took on a shiny look, like she was fighting back tears, then she turned them away. “I’m sorry. You belong to him.”
He caught the end of the Aulis in his right hand and, for a moment, he seriously considered yanking on it until the damn thing snapped. It wouldn’t break.
Just like it didn’t before.
He knew the feeling too well now, knew all the horrible ways that feeling could be used to make him weak. He never wanted it again. Not even for this.
“I’m not asking you for forever,” he said at last. “I won’t. I know you can’t go against him. Just please, not tonight. Give me tonight.”
The corner of her mouth turned up in a shaky version of her earlier smile, but she turned her eyes back to his. “I guess your arm could use another day or two of observation. But that’s all I can do.”
“I understand,” Kaie said. “It’s enough.”
Her smile gained some strength. “Okay then. I suppose I should clean up this mess. You should get some sleep.”
“I’m not tired,” he told her, sniffing again.
“No?” She smiled and stood up before he could answer. She came back a moment later with a bucket and more rags. Kaie intended to offer help, or at least to apologize for the mess. But instead, almost the same moment she knelt down beside the cot, his eyes fell closed and he was asleep again.
The next time he opened his eyes, it was dark again. At first, he didn’t know why he was up, only that something woke him. He tried to will his thundering heartbeat back to normal. It was a struggle, keeping his breathing even and his body still while he waited. Thankfully, it wasn’t long.
There wasn’t any reason to suspect it was Gregor, pacing in the shadows of the hospital. But Kaie knew it was. Even before the whispers.
“I don’t know why I keep coming here. Maybe I’m hoping you won’t be here.
That you’ll run and die out alone in that damn desert.
That I won’t ever have to set eyes on you again.”
Kaie was shaking. He controlling it, keeping it small, but it was getting harder. He didn’t know if it was anger or fear that did it. He wasn’t sure it mattered.
“I’m sorry this was done to you. You’ll never believe it, but I am. But I’d do it again. Gods help me, for her I’d do it a million times. Her being one of those things, being locked up in that place…”
The Rit dropped down on another cot, still far enough away that he was little more than
an
shadow, and let out a bitter laugh. Kaie nearly jumped at the sound. It was so alien in this place, to this man, too loud and angry and defeated.
“I didn’t give you to that man to punish you. I enjoyed that part of it, I won’t pretend I didn’t, but that wasn’t my reason. You won’t believe that either.” Gregor sighed. “I have to protect her. I know it’s not her anymore. I
know
it. But I can’t let him do this to her. He claimed her before I even knew. I begged him, offered him anything he wanted.”