Falling Darkness: The second book in the Falling Awake Series (35 page)

Downstairs, in the apartment, the Christmas tree glowed warmly. It really did look good, and nearly too big for the modest sized room. I lay down on the sofa and watched the fluctuation of the lights, letting it send me to sleep. It didn’t feel like I’d been sleeping long, when warmth wrapped around me. I opened my eyes and the cover from my bed was tucked in around my body. I sat up but there was no one else in the room with me. I rubbed my eyes awake and then got up, dragging my quilt to my bedroom.

When I was small I would never have dared sleep in the living room on Christmas Eve in case I woke up early and found Santa leaving my presents. Of course
now
I know he’s not real, but the thought of waking up to him still creeped me out.

I changed into shorts and a matching cami and crawled into bed, flicking out the bedside light. I turned when the door of my bedroom creaked open.

“Ressler?” he was standing in my doorway, leaning against the frame.

“Just wanted to say goodnight.”

I sat up and brushed my hand through my hair. “Was that all you wanted?”

“I guess I wanted to see you.”

“You miss my music?” I smiled, thinking about earlier.

“I never want to hear that garbage again.”

“I can’t make any promises. There’s always next Christmas.”

“Remind me not to invite you next Christmas,” Ressler said and I laughed, grabbing my pillow from behind me, throwing it at him.

“Oh, hey,” I said, when he caught it. “I got you something.” I reached down under my bed and pulled out a small, square black box tied in silver ribbon. I patted the spot next to me. “Here.” I handed it to him when he sat down next to me.

“For me?” He looked at me like he had never been given a gift in his life.

“Yeah, for you. Open it. I was gonna give it to you tomorrow, but since you’re here,” I said, while he untied the ribbon. A grin broke out on his face when he flipped the lid on the box and I smiled, too.

He pulled out a thin silver chain with one half of a pair of wings hanging from it. He looked down at my arm and held it up with an almost identical chain and the other half of the wing set.

“You snapped my bracelet in half?”

“No,” I said, laughing. “A jeweler done it. Look on the back.” He turned over my half of the bracelet and there was an
R
inscribed on the back, then he checked the back of his, where there was the letter,
P.

“You did this?”

I nodded.

“I love it.” He put his arm around my neck and kissed the top of my head. “I didn’t get you anything.”

“You’re enough,” I said. “You can just owe me next year.”

“Deal.”

I fastened up the bracelet around his wrist. “With these, I kinda figured we’ll always have each other.”

“I like that.”

“Good. Now go to bed before Santa catches you. He doesn’t leave you presents if you’re still awake. I don’t know if anyone ever told you that.”

Ressler shook his head, laughing. “I’m going. See you in the morning.”

“Night.”

The night was long and tedious, and at three a.m., I decided I couldn’t sleep.

I knocked on Caleb’s door then pushed it open before there was time for an answer.

“I couldn’t sleep,” I said. Caleb was lying on his bed with his arms crossed behind his head, with just his sweat pants on and socks. Wow, he looked good. I swallowed down a big chunk of desire and closed the bedroom door behind me. “What are you doing?”

“Thinking,” he said, looking up at the ceiling.

I sat on the end of the bed. “About what?”

“You.”

“Me?” I choked out.

“Is that so hard to believe?”

“You
have
spent the past few months hating me,” I pointed out. “So yes,
it is
that hard to believe.”

“I don’t hate you now.” I looked over at him and he was staring at me. His green eyes were turning darker by the second. “Come here.”

I was sure my blood pressure must be sky high and I could only hope it wasn’t showing on my face. I stood up, keeping my eyes on Caleb and he kept his on me. I’d waited for a moment like this and now it was here, I didn’t know what to do with it. I would be mush in his hand the minute he had me.

I sat in the space on the bed next to his exposed chest, and tried my hardest not to look at it and only at him.

“I’ve been trying really hard to get over you,” I said with a shaky voice. “Don’t ruin it.”

“And I’ve been trying really hard not to kiss you. Would that be ruining it?” The room was growing smaller and hotter.

“That would be ruining it,” I said. Caleb hadn’t laid a hand on me and yet my insides were quivering. This boy was lethal.

“Then that’s just too bad.”

He pulled me down onto the bed and rolled over on top of me, causing me to squeak in laughter. His hair fell down around my face and his lips were on mine, shutting me up. I’d missed the feel of his warm lips, prizing every ounce of wanting from me and I kissed him back with a moan. My hands were everywhere. His neck, his back, his hair. I was greedy and I didn’t care. He sat up, taking me with him and I wrapped my legs around his waist. He brushed the hair from my face and inhaled the skin on my neck. “I’ve missed you,” he murmured, buried in the crease of my shoulder blade. He kissed me softly and I tipped my head back, giving him better access.

“I’ve missed you too.” It came out in a breathless whisper and I cupped my hands around his face so that I could look at him. “Caleb…”

His lips were on mine again, warm and soft. He was the right amount of gentle and rough and I never wanted to let him go. Every time I was with him like this I could only think about how one day he wouldn’t be here at all. The memory pulled me away from him and I stopped the kiss.

“This is too hard,” I said.

“What’s so hard about it?” he said. “It seems easy enough to me.”

“Well it’s not for me. I can’t just settle for a make out session every now and then and go back to acting like we’re just friends everywhere else. It’s all or nothing, Caleb.”

“Then I’m all in,” he said, biting down on my neck.

“I’m serious,” I said.

He brought his head up to look at me. “So am I.”

“What about your wings? What about when you finally leave and you don’t come back?”

“We’ll deal with that when we have to. I know I said you and me was a bad idea, but I’m not about to let someone else have you.”

It was a risk if I agreed to this. I would be broken when he finally left. It didn’t even seem possible to get over something like that. Saying yes was on the very tip of my tongue. I’d been fooling myself if I thought I was doing a good job of getting over him. I was convinced such a thing didn’t exist. I had nothing to lose as far as I could tell. Either way, Caleb wasn’t forever so while he was offering it, I saw no reason why I shouldn’t have all of him while I had the chance.

“Okay,” I agreed.

Caleb smiled before dropping the shadow of a kiss onto my bottom lip. “Just me and you,” he said. I answered him with a kiss of my own, long and heated. He was mine and I was every bit his, and tonight, I had no intentions of leaving his side.

Christmas morning, and I was back in my own room, fitted out in white, skinny jeans and a longline, red sweater with a sweetheart neckline. I fluffed up my freshly washed hair and dabbed on some clear lip gloss. I had laid out my presents for everyone the night before. Well morning actually, by the time Caleb finally let me go and I was ready to wake everyone else.

“You look beautiful,” Caleb said, when I walked into the hallway. He was standing in the kitchen, watching me like a hungry wolf. “Red is your color.”

“Thank you,” I said, stopping to give him a quick kiss, which quickly turned into a whole lot more when he picked me up, dropping me onto the counter and his hands found their way inside my sweater.

“Not now,” I said, pushing his hands back down, but with a prominent smile on my face. “Gracey will be here soon with dinner.”

“We don’t have a table,” Caleb said.

“So you’ll bring one down from upstairs.”

“I will?”

“You will,” I said, hopping down to the floor. I went through to the living room where Drake and Ressler were both crashed out on the sofas and I gave them both a hard shake. When Drake cracked open one eye, I couldn’t help myself and I leaned down, giving him a kiss on the cheek. “Happy Christmas.”

His response was a groan and a smile that looked more like a grimace. I gave exactly the same treatment to Ressler and then when Drake was fully awake I opened the door that lead out to the utility closet and lugged in his present. It was pretty obvious what it was, but there was no way to disguise it.

Drakes eyes widened in surprise. He stood up to tear into the silver wrapping paper. “You got me a surfboard?” he turned the white board, trimmed in orange and yellow. “How did you afford this?”

“I have savings and you’re really good. I thought maybe you could take me surfing when summer gets here.”

“Oh you get him a board and give me a second hand gift,” Ressler joked. “How is that fair?”

“Shut up,” I said. “Your gift is priceless.”

“This is great,” Drake said. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.”

I picked up a flat box from under the tree and passed it to Caleb. “For you.”

He rattled the box, before opening it. Inside there was a white and brown feathered dream catcher with patterned beads. “You got me a dream catcher?”

“I was hoping you would still end up in mine and it would be a real shame to waste them. I want to keep every single memory,” I said.

Caleb lowered his head and kissed me. I pulled away, embarrassed when it lingered too long.

“I’ll go hang it up right now, ready for tonight,” Caleb said and went through into his bedroom. There was only Leah’s gift left apart from Gracey’s but I didn’t have a clue where she was so that would have to wait.

“We got you something,” Drake said. He reached behind one of the cushions on the sofa and gave me a red gift box. I really wasn’t expecting anything.

“You bought me something?”

“Course,” Drake said. “Open it. It’s from all of us.”

I lifted the lid on the box to see a white book inside. I tipped it out and flicked to the first page. Pictures of my mom and dad filled the insides. “How did you get these?” I asked, looking between Drake and Ressler.

“Ressler found your stash and the rest was what he managed to pull out from the attic.”

I flicked through the pages. “This is perfect.” My throat was clogged with tears. I stood up and hugged Drake and Ressler at the same time. “I love it,” I said.

“I’m glad,” Ressler said, rubbing his hand over my hair. “We couldn’t really think of a better gift.”

“I think I can.”

I lifted my head up, stepping out of Drake and Ressler’s arms. Caleb was under the archway with a deadly serious expression, and before I could start to question what was going on, a grin pulled up the corner of his mouth. “Gabriel’s awake.”