Read Fade Online

Authors: Lisa McMann

Tags: #Juvenile Fiction, #General

Fade (10 page)

“Yes.”

“Grab the backseat. And if you get sucked into a dream that"s unimportant to the case, pull out of it. Don"t waste your strength. You

can pull out of them now, can"t you?”

“Most of the time—the regular dreams, anyway. Not always with nightmares.”

“Keep working at that. It"s very important.”

“I want to try pausing the dreams. Panning the scene. How did you do

that?”

“It"s all about focus, just as you focus to pull out of dreams, Janie. Just

as you focus to help people change their dreams. Stare hard at the

subject and talk to them with your mind. Tell them to stop. Focus on

panning first—that comes most easily. Then pausing the scene. Who

knows, perhaps you"ll be able to zoom and rewind someday—that really

comes in handy when solving crimes. And keep studying the meanings

of dreams too. You"ve read books on the subject, haven"t you?”

“Yes.”

“Your work will be easier the more you can interpret some of the strange

aspects that naturally occur in dreams. This, too, will help you immensely. Study my notes, see how I"ve interpreted dreams over the

years.”

Janie nods, then blushes, remembering Miss Stubin can"t see her.

“I will.

Miss Stubin?”

“Yes, Janie?”

“About the green notebook…”

“Ah, you"ve found it, then.”

“Yes.”

“Go on.”

“Does Captain know about it? About what"s in it?”

“No. Not the notebook.”

“Does she know anything about how dream catching works?”

“Some,” Miss Stubin says guardedly. “We talked a little over the years.

She"s certainly someone you can talk to when you need to.”

“Does anyone else understand this besides you and me?”

Miss Stubin hesitates. “Not that I know of.”

Janie fidgets. “Should I read it? Do you want me to? Is it horrible?”

Miss Stubin is silent for a very long time. “I can"t answer those questions for you. In good conscience, I can neither encourage you to

read it nor discourage you from reading it. You must decide without my

words swaying you either way.”

Janie sighs and reaches for the old woman"s hand, stroking the cool,

paper-thin skin. “That"s what I thought you"d say.”

Miss Stubin pats her gnarled hand on top of Janie"s soft one. She smiles

wistfully and slowly disappears into the misty evening. 7:54 a.m.

It"s Sunday morning. And it"s time. It"s been ten days since Janie found

the green spiral notebook.

She slips back into bed with Cabel for a few minutes. He"s just dozing

now, not dreaming, and she holds him tightly, taking in whatever she

can from him before she goes.

“I love you, Cabe,” she whispers.

And goes.

Back to her room two streets away.

8:15 a.m.

With the notebook resting ominously on Janie"s bed, Janie procrastinates.

Does her homework first.

And pours herself a bowl of cereal. Breakfast—one of the five most

important meals of the day. Not to be skipped.

10:01 a.m.

She can"t stall any longer.

Janie stares at the green notebook.

Opens it.

Reads the first page again.

Takes a deep breath.

10:02 a.m.

Takes another deep breath.

10:06 a.m.

Picks up her cell phone and hits memory #2.

“Komisky,” she hears.

Janie"s voice squeaks. She clears her throat. “Hi, Captain. I"m sorry to

call on a—”

“It"s okay. What"s up?”

“Um, yeah. The dreams…Did Miss Stubin ever show you what was in

the files?”

“I"ve read the police reports she"s made, yes.”

“What about her other notes on handling dreams and stuff?”

“I glanced at the first few loose pages in the file, but I felt like I was

invading her privacy, so I put everything away as she requested.”

“Did you two ever…you know, talk about her ability?”

There is silence.

Plenty of it.

“What do you mean?”

Janie cringes silently. “I don"t know. Nothing.”

Captain hesitates. “All right.”

“Okay.”

There is a nervous sigh.

“Captain?”

“Janie, is everything okay?”

Janie pauses.

“Yeah.”

Captain is quiet.

Janie waits. And Captain doesn"t press it.

“Okay,” Janie says finally.

“Janie?”

“Yes, sir.” It"s a whisper.

“Are you worried about Durbin? Do you want out of this?”

“No, sir. Not at all.”

“If something else is bothering you, you may say it, you know.”

“I know. I"m…I"m fine. Thanks.”

“May I give you some advice, Janie?”

“Sure,” Janie says.

“It"s your senior year. You"re too serious. Try to have some fun. Go

bowling or to a movie or something once in a while, okay?”

Janie grins shakily. “Yes, sir.”

“Call me anytime, Janie,” Captain says.

Janie"s throat is closed. “Bye,” she finally says. Hangs up.

10:59 a.m.

Janie takes a deep breath.

Turns the page.

It"s blank.

11:01 a.m.

Turns the blank page.

Sees the familiar scrawl.

Smoothes out the page.

ı

And then her stomach lurches, and she slams the notebook shut. Puts it back in the box.

Into the closet.

11:59 a.m.

Janie calls Carrie. “Do you feel like going bowling?”

She imagines Carrie shaking her head and laughing, telling Stu, coming

back to the phone. “You are such a dork, Hannagan. Hell yeah, why not.

Let"s go bowling.”

NITTY GRITTY

February 13, 2006

The names and schedules of Chem. 2 students are burned in Janie"s

brain. But the problem is, most science nerds don"t sleep in school. And

even if they did, the issue remains of how Janie can be in the same room

with them when—if—it happens. It appears impossible. And seeing how it"s winter, it"s futile to creep around outside their bedroom windows at night. She has high hopes for the chemistry fair.

It"s all she has to bank on.

Cabel tries making a connection with each student on the list. He has

more of them in his classes than Janie does. But they remain aloof,

associating him with the popular Hill crowd, because of his past ties to

Shay Wilder. He"s frustrated.

There are eighteen Chem. 2 students in all this year. There were thirteen

Chem. 2 students last year. All thirteen graduated and went to college,

Cabel discovers, some of them as far away as southern California.

Doggedly, Cabel tracks them, in case their lives changed somehow in

the nine months since graduation. He spends hours each evening on the

computer, checking their blogs, their Facebook and Myspace pages,

looking for any wild tales they may have thought they were keeping

semiprivate.

And together, they have a whole lot of nothing.

ı

The one and only lead Janie has at the moment is Stacey O"Grady from

first semester of Chem. 2. She"s in Janie"s study hall. Stacey has horrible

nightmares, if she sleeps at all. Which is rare. But lots of people have horrible dreams, and it doesn"t mean anything,

as far as Janie can tell. Even if the dream is about a rapist. Janie knows

that a dream about being chased by a rapist could possibly be literal, but

more likely it"s a hint of an underlying fear in some other part of your

life. The fear that something"s catching up to you, or that you can"t run

fast enough, or that you"ve lost your voice and can"t scream—all could

simply indicate being overwhelmed with school or home pressures or

feeling helpless to change things. Being a senior could do that to many

people.

Still, Janie wills Stacey to fall asleep in study hall again, so she can get a

better look.

ı

Six of the ten students in Janie"s Chem. 2 class are female. She doesn"t

know any of them well, although they"re friendly enough with one another. None of them are going to the chem fair. When Desiree Jackson suggests a study group night at her house before

an upcoming test, Janie jumps at it. Maybe she can get some information

that way. Several others like the study group idea too. They agree to

meet Thursday night at seven at Desiree"s.

ı

Mr. Durbin hands out the flyers for the March 4 party, and Janie raises a

question. “What do you think about inviting the first semester group to

join us? More people, more fun, I"m thinking. Or maybe you don"t have

room for so many in your house, Mr. Durbin.”

Janie has driven by Mr. Durbin"s house. Cabel managed to snag the

floor plan from the township office. She"s got it memorized. It"s a three-bedroom home with a large kitchen that overlooks the spacious

great room. With its finished basement, the house is easily large enough

for twenty or more.

Mr. Durbin scratches his chin. “I like that idea. Class, what do you think? You guys good with that?”

The class wants to know who those people would be. Mr. Durbin flips

through the eight names by memory, and the consensus is affirmative.

“Cool,” Janie says. “I"ll make some more flyers. We should get a head

count on how many are planning on coming.”

“Good idea. Sheesh, eighteen kids. You guys are gonna break my bank

account,” Mr. Durbin jokes.

Several girls offer to bring appetizers, and Mr. Durbin gratefully accepts

the offer. Janie"s puzzled now. She thought he might balk at the idea.

But he"s giving no indication of this being anything other than a cool

party for science geeks.

“Don"t let me see you bringing any alcohol,” Mr. Durbin says lightly,

and grins like he"s young enough to be hip with the thoughts of seniors

and wants to nip it in the bud. But the mere acknowledgment sets several

students exchanging mischievous glances.

He said that on purpose
, Janie thinks.
To get the students
thinking about

it.

After class Mr. Durbin stops Janie. “Good idea for the party, Janie.

Maybe a few of you girls could come early to help set it up?” He"s giving her a helpless bachelor look.

The back of Janie"s neck is prickling, but she smiles excitedly.

“Awesome. This is going to be a blast! You are such a cool teacher.

You"re just like one of us, you know?”

Mr. Durbin grins. “I try. It"s only been eight years since I was a senior in

high school. I"m not some old geezer, you know.” He"s languid, leaning

against the side of his desk, arms crossed in front of him. And then he"s reaching out his hand. “Hold still,” he says. “You"ve got

an eyelash.” He brushes lightly across Janie"s cheek with his thumb, and

his fingers linger at her hairline just a second longer than necessary.

Janie lowers her eyes demurely, then looks back up into his.

“Thanks,”

she says softly.

He gives her a smoldering look that is unmistakable. Janie hesitates a

moment, then waves her fingers lightly as she turns and hurries out the

door to her next class.

ı

In study hall, Janie finds Stacey and slides into the chair across from her.

Janie wants to be the first to announce the invitation to the party at Mr.

Durbin"s, so she can gauge Stacey"s reaction. “Hi,” she says with a grin.

Stacey looks up from her book with surprise. “Oh, hey, Janie. What"s

up?” Janie notes with a creepy shudder that she"s reading Margaret

Atwood"s
The Handmaid’s Tale
.

“You were in Durbin"s Chem. 2 class last term, right?”

“Yesss…” Stacey looks suspicious.

“And you"re going to the chemistry fair, right?”

“Oh, that. Yeah—you are too?”

“Yep. Sounds like fun. I"ll be at the meeting next week to create our

display.”

“Cool. It should be easy enough.”

“Anyway, I"m actually here to ask you about Durbin.”

Stacey"s eyes narrow. “What about him?”

“Well, he"s having his Chem. 2 party at his house, and our class decided

to invite your class to come too.”

Stacey gets a goofy smile on her lips. “Oh cool! He didn"t, by chance,

tell you guys what happened last semester, did he?”

Janie cocks her head. “No, not really. Just said everybody had a great

time.”

Stacey"s grin grows wider. She leans forward across the table, and

whispers, “Everybody got completely plastered. Even Durbin and Wang.”

Janie"s heart jumps. She controls her surprise, and speaks softly.

“Wang

was there too?”

“Yeah. Durbin and Wang are buddies. I think they play a lot of rec basketball together or something. Durbin said something about Wang

being there for entertainment and crowd control.” She laughs, and then

grows serious. “Don"t tell anybody about the alcohol, "kay? Durbin and

Wang could both get canned for it. But we chem geeks are a loyal bunch.

And we know how to keep our mouths closed,” she adds. She"s chuckling to herself.

“Of course,” Janie says seriously. “I"d never rat on him—He"s the best.”

“Yeah.” Stacey sighs. “He"s sooo hot. Wang"s not bad either, for a snooty guy who lives up on the Hill.” The girls giggle softly, and Janie

pulls out an extra copy of the party flyer. “Here"s the info. Do you think

you can make it? We"re getting a head count so we know how much

food to make.”

“Hell yes, I"ll be there. I could use a break from this crazy pace. You

want me to spread the word? Most of the others are in my physics class.”

“Sure. I"ll get you some more flyers tomorrow.”

“Sweet. And that was real cool of your class to invite us,” she adds with

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