Exchange Rate (21 page)

Another man showed up from the bottom of the opposite tower. He jogged to reach me. “Hey, what do you need?”

I pointed toward the forest. “I’m from the medical clinic. I need to check and see if there’s any wild ginger or mint yet. I’m short in my stores and I need some.” My nausea hadn’t gone away and if I didn’t have some tea around ten o’clock, I found myself throwing up in the clinic. I’d hesitate to tell anyone the reason our stock of the natural remedies was almost gone was because of me. No one needed the details.

“I’ll come with you. You don’t want to be out there by yourself.” He smiled and waved his hand at the other tower guy.

Another man stepped from the base of the tower. “It’s okay, Ben. I’ll take her.”

His voice. I froze. How had I gone so long without seeing him and then the one day I needed to leave the safety of the walls, there he was? Where was my grace?

Instinctively I reached for my stomach. My stiff smile didn’t bend even as he approached, waving off the clearly disappointed guardsman. “Thank you, but I really don’t need a guard. I don’t even leave the view of the towers.” I clenched my fingers around the wicker handle. What was I going to do? I wanted to scream. To run.

But I held my ground.

He closed the distance between us, a finger pressed to his lips. “Shhh. Relax, Kelly. Let me hold your basket for you. I’m not going to hurt you. Not in front of all these men. And not when you’re expected at the clinic in an hour.”

His smile pierced me and a wave of nausea roiled upwards. But I fought it off. I had to keep my control. I had to hold my breath. I had to do this.

I didn’t say anything, I didn’t comment, just passed him my basket, careful to keep my shoulders hunched forward to hide the baby bump as much as possible. “Why do you want to hurt me so bad? Charlie wasn’t anyone special to you.” I stepped forward as the gates opened to let us out into the woods. Then I realized I didn’t need to go out there as badly as I wanted. Even if I was completely out of ginger or mint, I would rather throw up all day long than go. I didn’t need to leave the walls. Not right then. Not with Shane.

Definitely not with Shane.

I stopped, turning to face him with my arms loosely crossed over my baby. Mine and Bodey’s baby.

His sickening smile brightened. “Charlie was my brother. And you’re going to pay. He told me about your mom, used to obsess about her before taking her at the camp. Then you took her. So he wanted you.” Shane stepped closer to me, reaching out and fingering a stray strand of hair beside my cheek. “His constant talk about you made me want you, too. And before this is over, I’m going to have you.”

A shiver of fear spiraled through me. “Then why were you with that other guy? Why’d you have to kidnap my mom? You brought this all on yourself.” Brave words from a desperate girl. My heart beat quickened and my breathing shallowed. Forget about perspiring, I was sweating bowlfuls.

“We needed women to trade. Charlie had this idea we needed more than just
stuff
to trade. Women would be the most sought after commodity and he was right. That other guy was just another dude working for Charlie and me. He died, by the way, thanks to your shot.” He touched his forehead with his forefinger, like a jerky salute.

“You know how sick that is, right?” I turned and waved at the tower guard and called out. “Thanks, guys, but I forgot something at the clinic. I’ll go another time.” The guard nodded and the gate immediately in front of me closed. I turned back to Shane. “I’m not going anywhere with you. At least here you can’t touch me.”

His chuckle chilled me. “Why? Because Rowan’s boy wants you? That doesn’t worry me, little girl. You’re so cold to him. He’ll lose interest as soon as one of these other chicks after him gets his attention. You’re forgettable. As soon as he moves his attention, you’re mine.” He narrowed his eyes, licking his lips.

“If I’m forgettable, then why haven’t you moved on?” Where was my brazenness coming from? I wanted to throw up. “Excuse me, I’m going to the clinic. I don’t feel well.”

“Oh yeah, is that because of the baby?” He watched me, not deviating from his stare.

I caught my breath. “What baby?” What was going on? How did he...

He stepped close, pushing his torso toward me. “I was the one who killed that sniveling woman and her husband. I wanted information though, too. So I worked on her until she gave me something. Apparently, you’re pregnant. And Rowan doesn’t know.” He lowered his gaze to my bump. His smirk burned like acid. “If you play your cards right, maybe you can convince me to keep the secret.”

Gathering saliva in my mouth, I jerked my head back and spit as much as I could in his face.

Shane didn’t pull back or even react beyond wiping his hand down his face. His tight voice told me I got to him though. “My bet is you don’t even know how much I watch you. How much you’re mine. I’m going to get revenge, Kelly. It’s only a matter of time.” He rubbed at a scar along his hairline, the same spot Bodey had hit him over the head with the gardening tool. “Do you remember your friends at the cabin? The ones you had blown up?”

I nodded, slow, unsure where he was going with his questions.

“It didn’t take long to torture information from them. We dropped their bodies just past the end of their porch. I’m surprised you missed it as you ran like cowards from the flames.” He licked his lips and reached out to touch my stomach. “I wouldn’t mind experimenting with you and the baby.”

The baby. Darkness in his gaze promised more than just pain to me, more than just death. He would do unthinkable things to get his point across and simply because he wanted to for his own enjoyment.

I broke the gaze war we were having, bent over and vomited on his shiny black boots.

Take that, you prick.

He danced away. “That’s sick.” The spit hadn’t gotten his attention, but my morning sickness was hard to ignore.

I backed up, hands in the air, speaking loud enough the guards could hear me. “I’m so sorry. I need to go. I don’t feel well.”

Turning, I broke into a modified jog which resembled more of a spastic scramble for my bunker. Not even the clinic would get me that day.

I slammed the door shut when I broke through. Panting, I cradled my belly in my arms. Oh, what was I going to do? Three faint rules my mom had recited to me over and over drifted to my memory. I hadn’t thought of them for so long.

Don’t trust anyone.

Pray.

Survive.

My mom’s voice in my head as I remembered all the times I’d rolled my eyes at her worry, her constant preparation, her need for me to be safe. I turned to the side, sliding down the support of the wall, my lips twisting and my eyes shut tight. I missed her.

I hadn’t missed her so hard in so long. I hadn’t allowed myself to feel in so long because the emotions were so overwhelming. A friend of mine in high school had popped anti-anxiety meds left and right because she couldn’t handle the pressures of her dad’s suicide and her brother’s disappearance. She’d walked around in a mild blur while life had passed her by.

Those pills couldn’t be more appealing right then. Pain wracked me as worry pounded through my blood. I clutched the denim belt loops at my waist, tugging at the material. My butt hit the ground and I leaned my head against the wall.

How did I pray when everything I’d done was wrong? I hadn’t expressed any faith. What God there was, wouldn’t want to hear from me so late in the game. I wasn’t worth anything. My value diminished daily.

Rowan would know and he’d kick me out – kill me. Kill my baby. Kill Bodey. Kill John.

My keening sobs broke from me, bursting free. I gasped and panted. The pressures from the last few months to not be discovered caught up to me and emotions exploded through me.

Arms pulled at me from both sides as John and Bodey lifted me from the floor and moved me to the couch. Bodey sat on the cushions beside me, laying me across his lap and encircling me in his arms. John sat on my other side and held my hand.

“What’s going on, Kel?” Bodey murmured. The moisture from my face felt like I’d just walked in from a rainstorm. I spilled everything, the meeting with Rowan eight weeks before and getting discovered by Shane. While I couldn’t breathe because of the stress, unloading on them brought an amazing amount of relief.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” John jumped from his seat and paced in front of the couch.

“Because you’re already stressed out with finding a way out of here. Bodey has to deal with these men all the time. And, quite honestly, I’ve been too tired to stay awake and see Bodey so the very few times I’ve seen him, I haven’t wanted to spoil it with this... information.” I pushed myself to a sitting position. I crossed my arms over my belly and my baby kicked me, hard.

I shifted to relieve some of the discomfort as the child stretched against my ribs and pelvis. My dad used to tease me about not having birthing hips. I finally understood what he meant about not having room to carry a child, even if my mom had shushed him and told me I’d be able to bear children fine.

I couldn’t even identify the fear that I wasn’t supposed to have babies and what might happen if I did. Shrugging, I wiped at my face and sniffed. “What do we do?”

John pushed at the air around him with flattened hands. “Let’s just take a breath and think this through. Shane hasn’t told Rowan up to now, maybe he won’t. There’s really no reason to, that we know of.”

A knock at the door echoed through the small chamber.

Our heads whipped in that direction and fear clenched my thighs and shoulders. I inhaled sharply, grabbing at Bodey’s arm and dragging my feet up under me.

Bodey and I turned our gazes to John. He stared at the door.

Another knock, this time more insistent, followed our momentary shock.

John glanced at us and then crossed to the door. “Don’t move.” He swung open the panel. “Rowan, nice to see you. What can I do for you?”

“Something pretty serious has been brought to my attention, John. Can I come in and clear this up?” Rowan pushed through, not waiting to be welcomed and pinned me with his stare. He glanced from my face to my rounded belly. He pointed at me. “Stand up, Kelly. I want to verify something.”

I glanced at Bodey and John, petrified would Rowan would slice off my stomach or something. They met my gaze, fear in their wide eyes.

I swallowed. And stood straight, not slumping.

Rowan’s eyes narrowed and he stared at my protruding belly. I wasn’t large, but with my slim frame, the belly made itself known without much effort.

Shane stepped inside, a large shotgun slung over his shoulder. He smirked.

I lifted my chin. If they were going to kill me, they’d better do it fast. The threats and promises for revenge were old.

Chapter 19

Pointing at Shane, I tilted my jaw. “Does he have to be in here?”

Dragging his gaze from my stomach to Shane, Rowan jerked his head toward the door. “No. I got all I need from you, Shane. I’ll be out in a minute.” He returned to focusing on my stomach, his dismissive attitude not lost on anyone.

Shane scowled, his stare dark and brooding. He turned, sweeping out to stand guard over the doorway. Even if I escaped Rowan, Shane would make sure I didn’t make it far.

Red heat flushed Rowan’s face. His mouth worked, but nothing came out. He clenched his fists at his side. “Do you understand what population control means?”

I nodded, silently, frightened by his obvious anger.

“When you came in to Freedom Pass, you agreed to the two-hundred residents rule. That’s two-hundred people who carry their weight in this community. This is a tightly controlled number for a reason. I didn’t pick it for fun. Is that what you think? That I reached into a hat and randomly pulled out two-hundred?” He waited for me to answer, his lips quivering.

“No.” I refused to be cowed even though my insides shook.

“You didn’t consult with me or even register your
marriage
. Your disrespect in this community doesn’t go overlooked.” He waved his hand toward Bodey, but held his gaze on me.

John spoke up. “But we’re at one-hundred-and-ninety-nine. This shouldn’t ruin your plans.”

Rowan slid his gaze to John, then back to me. “No. Two-hundred people who carry their weight. What do you think a child will be able to do? They don’t have a lot of value. Not in this small community. We can’t afford free-loaders.” He squinted at me, studying me. “And for your information, we took on another member two weeks ago. She makes two-hundred.” He sighed, slapping his thigh. “Why didn’t you control this? You knew the rules. It’s like you
want
me to discipline you and your entire family.”

“Control a pregnancy? How do you even do that? We barely have medicine in the clinic for scrapes and cuts.” I clamped my mouth shut at a look from John.

“You don’t have sex, little girl. That’s how you control pregnancy. I have specific couples picked out for reproduction. They’ve been paired and will be given the go-ahead once I secure a larger compound. They’ll receive the
go-ahead to have sex
. No one here is performing, like you apparently are.” He glared between Bodey and me. “I guess, Bodey, I haven’t kept you busy enough with your hours.”

“You have.” Bodey’s tight voice suggested slim control.

I didn’t look his direction, but pressed my leg imperceptibly against his knee. I hadn’t moved far when I’d stood. I needed his nearness more than I needed to speak.

Rowan didn’t say anything for a moment. He tapped his foot on the ground, contained rage ticking in his jaw and in the squared shape of his shoulders.

Suddenly, his face cleared and he relaxed his neck so his head shifted back to a complacent angle. “Because your baby will be a worthless community member as well as raises the number above two-hundred, that nullifies your family from residency here. You’ll have to leave.”

John stepped forward. We all knew leaving meant death, if we went when Rowan wanted us to and how he wanted us to. “Kelly has to stay here. She won’t be able to deliver the baby on her own. You can’t kick us out for this.”

Rowan rounded on John. “You betrayed me. After everything I’ve done for you and your family and this is how you repay me? I brought you in, when I didn’t have to. I kicked out a lovely family in exchange for you.”