Ever: The Ever Trilogy, Book One (Volume 1) (2 page)

The sudden appearance of a moving truck bothered me. I hadn’t known anyone was moving into the house next door. It had been empty since Frankie’s dad moved away … shortly after the divorce, which was shortly before his mom’s suicide, which was all very shortly after—and
due to
—the car accident we didn’t speak of. Trying to convince his father that Frankie’s ghost was still hanging around proved impossible. He thought I had a sick sense of humor, ended up hating me, and left without telling us a thing. No forwarding address, no goodbyes. After knowing me for my entire life, he’d suddenly looked at me as though I were a monster.

There had never been a For Sale sign, or an open house, or even a Realtor.

It irritated me, though I had no idea why it should matter, really. I mean, Frankie’s house was vacant. Last we’d been able to uncover, his dad lived somewhere in the mid-west with family. Frankie wasn’t going anywhere, so why should I care if another family moved in next door?

But I did. I couldn’t pretend it didn’t feel like the end of an era or something. I’d practically grown up in that house.

My thoughts were interrupted when I saw the new neighbor. Suddenly it didn’t feel like the
end
of anything. More like the beginning. Of what, I didn’t yet know. But I wanted to find out.

He jumped down out of the back of the moving truck, instead of using the ramp, and made his way toward the front of Frankie’s house.

I would have to stop calling it that.

He carried a box labeled “Toby’s Room.” I played around with the name in my mind before saying it quietly. “Toby,” I whispered. Yes. I liked the way that sounded, almost as much as I liked the way he looked. Wow.

He wore tight black Levis and a snug-fitting, faded black t-shirt, finished with a pair of worn-out black boots. I looked down at my own clothes, amused to see we looked like we could have gone shopping in the same closet this morning. Both of us in all faded black, except I had a tiny touch of red in the form of a glitter skull and crossbones on the bottom hem of my purposely-distressed black-on-black striped tank top.
So he’s a snappy dresser. Nice.

His hair was a bit long on top, and the back curled up just enough that it looked like he was far between haircuts. His bangs hung in his face, and he kept blowing the golden brown hair out of his eyes—without much success. I found myself smiling as he did so, the action making him seem distracted and innocent.

Judging by the way he carried himself, I could tell he was a bit older than me, but I was unsure of how much. Maybe a few years? He had on sunglasses, so I couldn’t see his eyes, but boy did I want to. To say that my curiosity was piqued would be a gross understatement. I glanced back at Frankie, guilt-ridden for feeling any inkling of interest in another guy, but he was busy talking to my mom in the doorway of the kitchen and hadn’t yet noticed the new neighbor. Or my instant fascination with said neighbor.

The way the two houses were lined up, I had a clear view of the front door of Frankie’s—
Toby’s
—house from my living room window. It had been a bonus for our parents when we were kids because they could easily watch us playing out front from either house.

I shamelessly watched Toby walk the length of the moving truck and enter the house. Right before he disappeared inside, he glanced over and caught me staring at him.

Shoot!

Before I could look away, I swear I saw a smile turn up the corners of his mouth. Reaching my hand up to my black hair, I remembered with horror the 1982 scrunchie holding the messy ponytail-bun-thing I had going on. My face quickly heated, and I knew I was probably bright red—my trademark blushing. I was suddenly very self-conscious, unable to think of anything but that damned scrunchie. I pulled it out, much too late for it to even matter because he was gone. To my dismay, I slowly realized that the scrunchie was the least of my worries. I still had a mouth full of brownies stored in my cheek like a chipmunk gearing up for the winter. Fan-
freaking
-tastic. Between that and the hair, I’d have to say as far as first impressions go, this one had been a complete fail.

“Ever? Ever?”

Jessie was calling me, but I was shamelessly waiting for another glimpse of him.

“Hellooo …. .Earth to Elenoaaaaaarrr!”

Oh hell no.

“
What
?”

I whipped around, prepared to bite off Jessie’s head for using my first name, but she giggled and shrank back into the couch. My glare must have been fierce. I don’t know what she expected; she knew how much I hate that name. Frankie snorted again and ducked his head, avoiding another glare from me. Instead, he diligently focused on an imaginary hangnail. He obviously hadn’t noticed what—or who—I had been staring at. Good.

“Geez, Ever. Chill. What are you looking at?”

“What? Nothing.” I glanced at Frankie, worried he’d catch my guilty tone.

“Whatever. Are you going to put in the movie? We better hurry if we’re going to watch all three of them tonight. I want to be home before Susan gets there.”

Ah yes, Susan. Jessie’s mom, in little more than the biological sense. At this moment, she was probably out on yet another date, with yet another random guy, draining yet another bottle of whiskey. If Jessie was lucky, this current guy wouldn’t end up crashing on their couch for God knows how long.

I waited a few more seconds, hoping to catch a glimpse of my new neighbor, but not wanting to draw any attention to what I was staring at. I tore myself away from the window, popped another movie into the DVD player, then curled up on the couch opposite Jessie. My scruffy little terrier mix, Gollum, lifted his head long enough for me to slide underneath it so he could resume his intense resting regimen.

My attention, unfortunately, was not on the movie, and not because I’d seen it so many times before. I couldn’t stop thinking about the hot new guy next door
.
Even more imaginative than usual, my mind started making up all sorts of different things about him, and I found myself creating and playing out scenarios in my head about how the two of us would meet and what would come next.

My fantasizing about Toby was tainted with remorse for Frankie, but the daydreams didn’t cease. And really, it isn’t like my remorse was even valid. Frankie wasn’t
actually
my boyfriend, regardless of how long I’d loved him. He didn’t even
know
I loved him in the first place.

“Whoa. Um, Ever? Who is
that
?”

“Hmm?” Still indulging in my fantasy world, I was barely able to acknowledge Jessie when she spoke.

“Dude. Look outside.”

I slowly looked up and saw Gollum staring out at the front yard, a low growl starting up in his belly. Following his gaze out the window, I saw the new neighbor again. Before I even realized I was moving, I was on my feet, making my way toward the front door. I vaguely registered Jessie’s bewildered voice calling me as I walked outside, frantically smoothing my hair along the way.

He leaned nonchalantly against the trunk of my Magnolia tree, hands in his pockets and completely at home there, as if he’d stood there like that a million times. He watched me through black Ray-Ban Wayfarers as I approached. I tilted my head to one side as I looked at him, and slowly, he did the same. I stopped a few feet from him, and we stood there, silently regarding one another. A soft-spoken voice in my head tried in vain to convince me to turn around and head back into my house, but I’ve never been very good at listening to that voice.

Up close, my earlier assumptions were confirmed. He had to be at least twenty years old. He had a little bit of scruffy beard stubble, that most guys my age still dreamed about. His mouth had the frown lines of someone who was perpetually deep in thought and the smirk of someone who thinks everything is just one big joke. The combination made him seem annoyed and amused all at the same time, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t like him instantly.

This is bad, very bad.
That silly little voice tried to warn me again.
Shh.

His arms were crossed, but the tightness in his muscles showed he was fit. He wasn’t bulky like someone who spent every waking moment in the gym lifting weights, but he was sculpted and lean like a swimmer. Matching the whole swimming notion, his skin was golden tanned.

Unlike Frankie’s ghostly pallor. Damn. Frankie.
What am I doing out here?

My body was stuck in place as I intensely examined the new stranger, and it continued to be completely at odds with the cautionary voice in my head.

He was gorgeous. Where Frankie was the all-American rockabilly musician type, always dreaming of the classic cars he’d never get to own, Toby was total badass, boots and all.

Maybe the complete lack of a normal relationship had caused me to become this crazy person who stands outside, silently examining strangers. Maybe harboring my impossible feelings for a ghost for so long turned me into a socially inept freak. I didn’t know why, but I found myself
really
wanting to touch him.

He leaned forward, like he was about to walk toward me, and startled me out of my examination of him. I stepped back a foot or so and realized my hand was outstretched in his direction.
Oh my god! I’ve actually been reaching for him!
I yanked my hand back to my side, hoping he hadn’t noticed, and cursed my own stupidity.

Settling back against the tree, an amused smirk pulled at his face. Of course he’d noticed. He probably thought his new neighbor was a complete nutcase.

I should say something to convince him otherwise
.

I couldn’t come up with anything. I stood there dumbstruck and unable to speak.
Gah! I
am
a freak.
But really, what could I say after such a ridiculous gesture as reaching out to touch a total stranger? It occurred to me, too late, that I could have pretended I was going for a handshake.

Idiot.

“Hey.”

Oh geez, he was speaking to me. “Hey.”

As he watched me, he obviously found amusement in my awkwardness. His smirk slowly curved into a full-blown smile.

Fantastic.

“I’m Toby. I just moved in next door.” He hitched a thumb in the direction of Frankie’s old house, and my stomach twisted ever so slightly.

“Yeah. Cool.”

Ah! I sound like such a tool!

“And you are … ?”

My eyes widened. “Oh. Sorry. I’m Ever.”

His eyebrows drew together. “Ever? Like, ‘
forever and ever
‘?”

“Yep. Just like that. It’s a nickname.”
Shoot!
Why had I said that? I knew he’d be tempted to ask what it was short for – people always were.
Don’t ask. Don’t ask.

“Oh yeah? That’s cool. What’s it short for?”

Damn. Um
…
“My initials. E, V, V, R.”

“Four initials, huh?”

“Yeah, well, my last name is Van Ruysdael, so two for that.”
Please don’t ask about my first name.
I was relieved when he didn’t. Maybe he saw a silent warning in my wide eyes.

“Cool. So what do you do for fun around here, Ever?”

“Um.” I shrugged, trying to figure out what to say. Did I confess, and tell him that I stayed home a lot because I was secretly in love with my best-friend-turned-ghostly-roommate who was stuck inside my house? Probably not. At least, not if I wanted to keep the freak factor to a minimum. “I don’t know … there’s lots of stuff. The mall. The beach. Irvine Spectrum … .”

“Can I take you out some time?”

Oh. Well, that was unexpected. I ran my hands through my hair. I wanted so badly to say yes. I wanted so badly to escape my purgatory. Yet I felt so guilty for wanting that. My mouth opened, and for a second, I feared that the word might actually fly out against my better judgment.
Yes.

“No. I have a boyfriend.”

Seriously? I lied instead of just saying yes and letting this hot new guy take me out? Wow. I actually was a freak. He cocked his head, and I swear I saw him look past me to my window as if he knew my “boyfriend” was actually right inside the house. I swallowed hard, hoping Frankie’s pale face wasn’t at the window.

“Huh. Really? Well, that’s a bummer.”

Toby stared at me a little longer than necessary, and I felt my heart rate increase before he shrugged casually and walked back toward Frankie’s house.
His
house. I swear Toby doubted me, though I couldn’t see how. There’s no way he could have known anything about me before today.

“See ya ‘round, Ever,” he called over his shoulder as he retreated.

I turned back to my house to see three faces shamelessly peering out the window. Below them, a fourth face, covered in fur, lost interest immediately and started staring down the street, probably looking for a rabbit to dream about chasing later. I noticed my mom’s wide eyes and enthusiastic smile, before she politely turned and pretended to be doing something else.

Jessie had the biggest, most ridiculous grin on her face that I’d ever seen. Before I could even begin to make my way back inside, she was already making her way
outside
to pester me with the first of what I was sure would be a thousand questions. She’d been trying to convince me to get over my feelings for Frankie to no avail, so seeing me interact with someone else was probably the greatest thing in the world as far as Jessie was concerned.

The other face, characteristically pale and translucent, looked even paler—as if he’d just seen a ghost. No pun intended. Frankie looked almost … broken. My heart pinched, and my stomach turned over. But why would he look that way? Why would he be … sad? Before I had much of a chance to ponder why Frankie would look so disappointed about me talking to the new neighbor, he quickly made his expression one of boredom then headed off to the back of the house. I’m pretty sure that was his way of avoiding me, though I’ll admit, I’m not sure why he needed to.

Shaking my head at the absurdity of it all, my ridiculous guilt at the top of the list, I prepared to face Jessie, who was eager to pounce on me with her newscast-worthy interrogation.