Authors: Sylah Sloan
He shrugged, but he still had that pink tinge. “It was nothing. Dorian had that coming for a long time.”
“Yeah, I’m sure he looks a lot worse.” Nik chuckled and walked towards the couch. He sat down and breathed out, wearily. I walked over and sat next to him, turned towards him and tucked my foot under my other leg. I stared at him, wanting to make this less awkward for him.
“Listen, you have nothing to be embarrassed about.” I don’t know if that was the best thing to say, seeing how guys didn’t like their wounds to be noticed. I wanted to make him feel better though. “You were pretty amazing.” He turned and looked at me with a small smile. “I knew your ego needed a little stroking.” He turned and faced me, and that was when I felt it.
It was the smallest of emotions, but when I looked in Nik’s eyes I could feel what he felt for me. It wasn’t anything supernatural or anything like that, but the way he looked at me made me feel like I was a goddess. I swallowed and shifted in my seat. He lifted his hand and picked up a lock of my hair, running the strands between his fingers as he looked in my eyes.
“You’re so beautiful, Meadow.” His voice was low, but filled with emotions. He looked so vulnerable, and when he slowly moved towards me, I was too stunned to move away.
His lips pressed against mine, and I stared at him, wide-eyed. His lips were firm yet smooth, and although I admit it was nice, I didn’t feel any of the things I felt when I kissed Cadeon. That was when my stunned brain finally kicked on. I gently pushed at his chest. Nik, being the gentleman that he was, didn’t give me any kind of resistance.
“I’m sorry. It’s just … I couldn’t help myself. I’ve wanted to do that for a while now.” He reached up and stroked my cheek, but I didn’t push it away. “You’re worth any cuts or bruises.”
Oh shit. This was really not good. Although I thought Nik was gorgeous, I loved Cadeon. I didn’t know what to say, so I just stared at him with what I knew was surprise. “Nik…” I didn’t know how to proceed, but I knew I needed to be honest with him. I took his hand in mine and looked into his eyes. “What you feel for me isn’t what I feel for you.” I expected to see shock register on his face, but he just sighed heavily.
“It’s him, isn’t it?”
Did he know? He must, but how was that possible? “What? Who?”
“Cadeon. I should have known, when I saw the way he looks at you, when you aren’t looking. I should have also realized as much by the way you look at him.” He ran his hand across his jaw and leaned back on the couch, resting his head on the back of it and staring at the ceiling. “I don’t know, I guess I just thought you felt something for me. Obviously I was wrong. I feel like an ass.”
I squeezed his hand, and he looked over at me. “I love him.”
“Love is such a strong emotion, Meadow.”
Anger seeped through me. “I know what I feel, Nik.” I hadn’t meant for my voice to betray my emotions, but I didn’t want someone telling me what I might and might not feel.
“Whoa. I didn’t mean anything by it, but you’re so young and he’s … well, he’s not.”
“He’s only twenty-one.”
“He’s been twenty-one for like ever.” Nik took his hand from mine and stood up. He walked over to his window and stared out. Frost covered the windowpane with white crystalline designs. I walked up to him but didn’t touch him. We stood there, just staring out the window in an almost comfortable silence.
“I do like you, Nik, it’s just…”
“You like him more. Or more so, you love him.” He turned and faced me. “I understand, really I do. It just blows.” He smirked, which made the situation a little less weird. “I hope I didn’t ruin our friendship.”
I smiled and play punched him in the arm. “Of course not.” Even though he smiled, I could see the emotions in his eyes. I really hoped we could be friends and none of this would be weird, because I didn’t want to lose my relationship with Nik.
****
I had a dreamless night, and I woke up seven hours later. I knew the sun was high in the sky, even though my room was still dark. Everyone would be asleep now, and though I should stay in bed and try to get more sleep, I couldn’t. I got out of bed and grabbed a set of clothes, before heading into the bathroom for a shower. After my shower, I piled my hair up in a damp, messy bun and ventured out of my room. The halls were dead quiet and the only sound permeating through the open space was the sound of the grandfather clock, down the hall.
My feet didn’t make any noise on the plush floor runner, as I turned the corner towards the staircase. Although there were no clear windows at the Manor, the light did shine through the stained glass, casting a cacophony of color across the floor and walls. I stopped before I reached a slash of light. I kept my body in the protection of the shadows, as I stared at the window, a scene of Angels and Demons fighting. I really shouldn’t have been doing this, and I knew both Mikhail and Cadeon would be pissed if they knew what I was about to do, but I wanted to know for myself.
I reached my hand out into the light, so slowly it was like everything stopped around me. I swallowed, my fingers the first part of me to touch the light. I thought maybe I would burst into flames or something, but when I felt only the slightest of tingles from the contact, I let out a breath of relief. This was probably not my brightest idea, but the excitement inside of me was too much to ignore. I ran up the stairs, feeling excited at the prospect of going outside. It had seemed like forever since I had been in the sunlight, and as I gripped the handle of the front door, I paused.
I started to think of what could happen to me and thought maybe the side effects of the sun on my new vampire body needed time to take effect. As those thoughts raced through me, I quickly pushed them aside, knowing if I let myself think too deeply about them, I would chicken out. I took a deep, steadying breath and turned the knob, pulling the heavy door open, and closed my eyes as sunlight washed through the main foyer. I felt warm all over and slowly opened my eyes, the snow sparkling all around me, like millions of tiny diamonds on the ground.
It was too cold, and with the sun shining brightly, it seemed warmer than I’m sure it was. My skin felt like it had fallen asleep, tingling all over but not uncomfortable or painful. I took a step onto the stone porch, holding my arms out slightly, and closed my eyes again. Soon the tingling subsided, and I was left with the glorious warmth, which seemed to wake my cells.
I felt arms wrap around my body and air leave my lungs, as I was pulled back forcibly into the house. My feet slipped on the floor, and I tumbled backwards, strong hands grabbing hold of my waist and keeping me from falling. The front door slammed shut, so loud I thought it would come off the hinges.
“You shouldn’t have done that, Meadow.” His voice was deadly calm, but I didn’t miss the way it made me feel very aware of my surroundings.
I turned my eyes to the side and saw a large shape pressed against the corner, light slashing through the stained glass, making a crisscross effect in front of him. Even though I couldn’t see who it was, I knew by the voice it was Cadeon. He sounded so angry with me, like I was a child who hadn’t listened to her parents.
“What?” I looked around, hoping no one was around to witness this, because I was getting embarrassed. “Why did you do that?”
“Why would you be so stupid as to go out into the sunlight?”
I squared my shoulders, his tone making me angry. “Excuse me?”
“You heard me, Meadow. You are acting foolish.” Although he still had yet to raise his voice, I could tell from his tone he was getting angrier.
“You told me I could go out into the daylight.” My face felt like it was on fire, my embarrassment rising with each passing moment.
“You know better than that. You know I told you we weren’t really sure yet. Look at yourself in the mirror and tell me if it’s safe to go out in the daylight.”
I had no idea what he was talking about, but I listened to him and walked over to the large mirror by the front door. My mouth hung open slightly, as I saw my red face. No wonder my face had felt like it was on fire. I had assumed it was from my embarrassment, but I was sunburnt. “I don’t understand.” I ran my fingers over my skin, my face almost immediately going back to my normal color. “It felt wonderful outside. There was no pain or anything.” I turned around and heard Cadeon sigh.
“The sunburn might have been the worst of it, but I don’t know. Any other vampire would have burst into flames, if they stayed out in the sun as long as you did, so I can’t dispute the fact that you are definitely a daywalker.”
He stepped out of the darkened corner, still staying away from the streams of light, but coming close enough, so that I could see his face and arms. I covered my mouth and stepped closer to him, seeing the awful third degree burns that covered his skin. One side of his face was bright red and had blisters covering it, along with both of his arms.
“Oh my.” I took I step closer, and he took a step back. I dropped my hands, feeling guilty. “Why did you do that, Cadeon? You’re hurt now, because of me.” He shook his head, and I watched in awe as the burns and blisters started to heal on their own. In a matter of minutes the only thing left from his injuries was a light pink coloring to his face and arms.
“It isn’t your fault. When I came to see if you were up and saw the open door, my worst fears came to life. I pictured you a pile of dust on the front steps, like some morbid gift someone left.”
I took another step towards him, until he was backed to the wall. I lifted my hand, and he didn’t flinch. I trailed my fingers over the side of his face. My heart clenched that he had gotten hurt because of me. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to feel the sun on my face again.” He breathed out heavily, reaching up and cupping my cheek. We stood like that for several minutes, his fingers brushing against my cheek while mine brushed against his arm.
“Promise me you won’t do anything like that again.” Cadeon spoke softly.
As I stared into his crystalline eyes, I wanted to promise him whatever would make him safe, and, even as I nodded my head, I knew that part of me was lying.
It was nearly Christmas, and everyone at the Manor was busy preparing. There went my whole belief that vampires didn’t like anything religious. Many students and teachers were busy setting up a huge blue spruce in the front foyer corner. It was ten feet tall, and the smell of the fresh needles and wilderness clinging to it put a smile on my face. I sat on the stairs and watched them, and, although I wanted to help put the ribbons and decorations on it, I didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. I was content enough to just sit and watch and when they were finished and everyone stood back to admire their handiwork, my heart broke a little at the memory of Marie and the kids.
Christmas had been the kids’ favorite holiday, mine too. Marie made fresh cookies, and I helped Cecile, Toby, and Mack build gingerbread houses. They were never great, but it had always been fun trying to recreate the masterpiece on the front of the magazine Marie had given us.
Everyone scattered, but I stayed and stared at the tree, the lights like millions of little stars, twinkling and bright. Someone put on Christmas music, and the soft notes filtered through the air. I turned and looked as Nik came and sat beside me, his ever-present NY cap on, his bright blue eyes a stark contrast to his pitch black hair. We hadn’t talked about the fight any further, and I preferred it that way. No one knew about what happened—the whole thing of freezing people in place and Rhyker reaching out for me. That was something I didn’t share with anyone besides Mikhail and Cadeon. They still hadn’t found anything new, and every time I sought them out, they were busy thumbing through ancient books, looking in the texts for the answers.
I leaned into Nik’s shoulder, smiling up at him as he started to sing along with the music. “What are your plans for Christmas? Are you going to spend it with your family?” He shrugged, not stopping his serenade to me. I had a feeling I shouldn’t have brought it up.
“My parents are going to Europe for the holiday, something about a romantic get-a-way with just the two of them.”
I leaned my head on his shoulder, feeling so bad for him. I wanted to tell him everything would be okay. “That means I get you all to myself.” I smiled up at him and even though he returned the smile, I could see how sad he really was. “It’s just going to be us anyway, Violet is spending time in
Aspen with her family.” I saw Cadeon walk into the foyer, his eyes already on me. His face drew into a scowl, which quickly disappeared as soon as it had come. I lifted my head from Nik’s shoulder, suddenly aware of how close we were. Our legs were touching, and I knew it must look pretty intimate. Although Cadeon and I were on better terms, we certainly weren’t in a relationship, and I shouldn’t have felt bad for how close Nik and I were. I thought about how I would feel if I saw Cadeon like this with another girl. Jealousy spiked inside of me, but I shoved it away.
“Hey.” I smiled. Cadeon returned the gesture, but I didn’t miss how his eyes kept going back to Nik. “What’s up?” Lately, Cadeon had been immersed in his work, and seeing him now made me realize how much I missed him.
“I’ll talk to you later. Maybe I’ll swing by with a movie after dinner?”
“Sure, make it something scary.” Nik smiled down at me, his gaze going to Cadeon and his smile vanishing. “Okay, see ya later, Meadow.”