EDGE OF SHADOWS: The Shadow Ops Finale (Shadow Ops, Book # 3) (25 page)

He cut a glance to Chase and then Jay, finally met her gaze, and nodded. “I have a feeling you might be right about that.”

<><><>

Billy knocked on the bedroom door, still holding Eve
’s hand. Rose answered, her wet hair bunched up, water dancing on the frizzy curls, sparking in the light. She’d changed into black cargo pants and a gray fleece top. She glanced at him, then at Eve, and gave a small nod.

She blew her breath out and sat down on the cot, patting the space beside her for Eve to join her. “You want to know about your dad.”

Eve blinked back tears and nodded, burrowing her face in Rose’s shoulder.

“I told you his name was Adam,” Rose said, her arm wrapped around Eve’s body, her hand stroking the girl’s hair. “And you know my father killed him. What you don’t know is that he died because of me.”

Billy watched through hooded eyes, marveling at how the tough woman he knew and admired had transformed herself into a protective, loving mother. Seeing Rose and Eve together, how much they looked alike, how similar their personalities were, but most of all, the tiny intimacies that only two people bonded in love shared, made his throat tighten. It had been a long, long time since anyone had looked at him that way, had cared about him that way.

“How did you meet?” Eve asked in a small voice that made her sound much younger than she was.

“He was eighteen. I was sixteen.” Rose’s voice became distant as if misted by the past. “He was an artist. He would have made a wonderful father.” Rose sighed, and for the first time since Billy had met her, he saw her back down, shy away from an unpleasant task. Usually, Rose was the first one to tackle a dirty situation, the last to complain about it.

“We lived in a small mining town. When the mines failed, the town collapsed,” Rose continued. “My father lost everything, our house, land that had been in his family for generations. After that, he poured all his energy into religion. The Old Testament kind—fire and brimstone, no room for forgiveness or disobedience.”

Eve shifted her weight, settled in, mesmerized by Rose’s voice spinning the tale from two decades before. Billy leaned against the wall, unable to not listen and be captivated as well. This was a Rose Prospero he had never known existed.

“Adam was the new kid in school, an outcast. Then, one day I cut class to go visit my grandmother. I was sneaking out through the playing fields when I saw a gang of boys beating up another boy. There were six of them to his one, but he was holding his own until one of the guys blindsided him, cut his legs out from under him, and he went down. They were all over him like a pack of hyenas.”

“What did you do?”

“Gram always said you can’t dodge trouble. The best thing is to face it head-on before it gets too big to handle. So as I ran past the field house, I grabbed one of the baseball bats and plowed into the fray, swinging it around like a battle ax and screaming like a banshee.”

Billy hid his grin; the picture of a young Rose rushing to protect a defenseless kid was so vivid. The mature Rose would have done the exact same thing—she still did, which was why they were here now.

“Were you scared?” Eve asked.

“Of course I was. I’m not dumb. But I knew if I let those guys get away with it, they’d just find another target. Then Adam was back on his feet, bleeding all over creation, but we stood back to back, and those bullies ran.”

“So how—” Eve’s voice faltered. “How did he die? I mean, I know your father killed him, but no one would tell me why. Surely not just because you were pregnant?”

Rose gazed into the distance. “I think my father had lost so much that somehow he’d come to believe that we—me, my mother and sister—were the last true things he had. As long as he had us—controlled us—he still had some sort of power in this world. He wanted to be a big man, a man strong enough to create the world, or at least his family’s world, in his image. But all he ended up as was a small, small man, too terrified to let go of anything.”

Eve frowned; she was too young to understand. But Billy knew exactly the kind of man Rose described. He’d met them in the Army and all around the world. Tyrants in their own minds. Bullies. Some were canny enough to manipulate their way into power like Grigor. Others had charisma and recruited followers, like the Preacher. In the end they all fell, victims to their own insatiable hunger.

“After I told Adam about the baby,” Rose continued. “About you.” She hugged Eve close. “We were so happy. Scared spitless—being sixteen and pregnant is probably one of the most terrifying things I’ve ever faced. But I had Adam. And my grandmother as well as Adam’s folks to help. I knew we could do it—knew you’d be worth it.

“Adam decided to talk to my father. I’d warned him not to, knew how bad my father’s temper could get, but Adam thought it was the right thing to do. The honorable thing. Only thing was, my father’s idea of honor was very different than Adam’s. He wouldn’t meet Adam at the house, instead met him down at the tavern where he had all his friends, drinking buddies, church buddies, guys who’d worked the mines with him. Adam never stood a chance. When I heard that he’d gone to meet my father, I ran after him, but I was too late.” Her voice caught the slightest bit, and her grip on Eve tightened. “Found him in the alley, dead. The police called it a mugging, but we all knew the truth.”

“So your father never went to jail or anything?” Eve’s voice was laced with anger.

Rose shook her head. “No. He drank himself to death—died two months before you were born. I was so lonely, missed Adam so very much, but then I had you, such a precious gift.” She leaned over to kiss Eve’s head. “My miracle baby.”

Eve’s mouth opened then shut again. Billy knew what she wanted to ask. He caught Rose’s eye, and she nodded her understanding.

“The hardest thing I ever did was to say good-bye to you,” Rose continued. “But I was so young, and I knew I’d make so many mistakes—and I still blamed myself for Adam’s death. After you were born, I pretty much fell apart. But my sister, Nancy, was there—she’d married a man totally unlike our father, a kind and gentle man. But he wasn’t able to have kids, and I knew Nancy would make the perfect mother. After all, she’d pretty much raised me. And you were such a gift, a blessing to us all…I guess maybe I took the easy way out, was too scared that I might do something wrong, cause you any pain, mess up your life like I had Adam’s.”

A tear escaped Rose’s eye. Billy wasn’t sure if she noticed it, her face buried in Eve’s hair, but he did. “I just loved you so much, and I knew it was the right thing, even though it hurt so very much. And it wasn’t fair to Nancy for me to stay around, to have you torn apart like that, so I left. Hardest damn thing I’ve ever done. But I wanted you to have everything, and it was the only way I could give it to you.”

Billy felt like an intruder, invading such a private moment. But as Eve turned to embrace Rose, Rose reached a hand to him, grabbing him tight. As if he were part of their family.

He closed his eyes, wishing he never had to let go.

<><><>

Rose gathered Eve in her arms, but all she could see was Adam. Eve looked so much like him. She hoped Eve understood that there was nothing Rose wouldn
’t do for her.

As Eve sobbed in her arms, Rose glanced up to meet Billy’s gaze. She took his hand in hers, needing his warmth, his solid strength to reassure her that all the many mistakes she’d made in her life had been worth it.

A tentative knock came on the door. “Lunch is ready,” Jay said.

Eve sniffed hard and broke free of Rose. “Thank you,” she whispered, kissing Rose on the cheek. Then she surprised Rose by standing up on tiptoe and kissing Billy’s cheek as well. She whispered something to him that made him look away. Then she left, closing the door behind her.

Rose stood, one hand touching her cheek, the other still holding onto Billy. She’d never felt so drained in her life. She needed—no, she wanted…

She spun into Billy’s arms, holding him tight in a no-holds-barred grip, unable to restrain her feelings. As if, after Eve had woken all those emotions, set them free from Rose’s tight confines, she couldn’t harness them anymore. Pandora’s box, unleashed, and Rose had no idea what havoc might ensue.

She raised her lips, found Billy’s for one brief, tender moment. Then she realized her mistake—no, she couldn’t risk losing him. She needed his friendship, needed him at her side. And she’d already risked that by accusing Susan Payne of being a traitor.

Rose lowered her arms, stepped back, more than a little sheepish at her lack of control. “I’m sorry. You and Susan—”

“Me and Susan, what?”

Why was he looking at her like that? As if he half expected her to pull a damn rabbit out of her sleeve? Like a kid getting ready to open his biggest Christmas present ever. And blushing. Since when did Billy Price blush?

She turned away in confusion. “You said you were ready to settle down.”

“I am.” He stepped toward her, one step, a second, until she couldn’t avoid the heat radiating off his body.

“You said you’d found the right woman.” Damn, she felt like a schoolgirl, unable to meet his gaze.

“I have.” He rested his palm against her cheek. “She’s right here in front of me.”

Rose was tempted, so very tempted to raise her face to his, to seek out his lips once more—lips she’d dreamt about. But this was no dream. This was reality, a reality where she’d been hurt too often before. Worse, she couldn’t risk hurting him.

She pushed away from him. “Then why’d you let me believe—”

“I knew I couldn’t make the first move. You’d say the Team comes first, that our friendship came first, some bullshit like that. I know you, Rose Prospero, better than you know yourself. You are a damn stubborn woman who might be one of the best and smartest intelligence operatives I’ve ever worked with, but sometimes you can be absolutely, stark raving blind!”

His eyes grew wide as if he’d surprised himself with his own words. They stared at each other, each daring the other to make the first move as if this were a sparring match.

He didn’t love Susan. He…he wanted her? Knowing everything, all her secrets, all her mistakes and screw-ups? Panic fluttered through her, leaving in its wake a feeling of excitement.

And she knew he was right. She'd been blind. She stepped into his space and took his face between her palms, bringing it down to meet hers. The kiss wasn’t soft or gentle, not at all like her first tentative try. Instead, it was fierce and bruising, fire and heat and passion unleashed in a lightning strike.

Too soon, they broke apart with a gasp. Rose reached for him again, but he took her hand, held her at arm’s length. “I wasn’t expecting that.”

“Thought you Delta guys were trained to expect the unexpected.” She teased her fingers along his rigid chest muscles, fluttering down his body, until he grabbed that hand as well.

He shook his head. “No. Wait. There’s something I need to tell you.”

She squirmed free of his grip, not liking the sudden pain in his voice, the way he wouldn’t meet her eyes. “What?”

“I know what Grigor did. In Razgravia.” The words came out hushed, soft—but that didn’t lessen their impact.

“It’s not exactly uncommon knowledge. Nineteen days in Chez Grigor—my least-favorite one-star resort.” She tried to make light of it. How could she ever have a normal relationship with any man after what Grigor and his men had done to her?

But Billy—God, how she’d dreamed of his hands on her, his mouth, of his body making her forget…

“No. You don’t understand. I know everything. I saw everything.” His voice turned urgent. Now he looked right at her, into her, as if seeing the past, and she was the one who flinched and turned away. “He made videos, Rose. We found them after…. It was my duty, searching for intel. I had to—”

She fell onto the cot, her fingers wrapping around the edge in a death grip. “You watched?”

Wordlessly, he sank down beside her. She twisted away from him, staring into the blank corner at the other side of the room.

“You never told me,” she whispered, hating the need in her voice. A need to move past this, to lock the past safely behind steel walls once again. How could she do that when every time she looked at him, she’d know he wouldn’t see her? He’d only see the woman Grigor broke.

He brushed her hair back from her neck. She didn’t flinch from his touch—felt too numb to even register it as if her body was blocking out all sensation, just as it had five years ago.

“I wasn’t sure—I didn’t know how…” Billy Price, Delta leader, uncertain? Never. Was it because he pitied her? Felt sorry for her? Had these past two years been a lie?

“And now?” Her mouth was so dry she could barely get the two words out.

“I meant what I said. I want to settle down with the woman of my dreams. I want you, Rose Prospero. Only you.”

He laid his lips on hers with such tenderness it took her by surprise.

“Please,” he whispered. “I know you have terrible memories of terrible things that no one should have to suffer. But all that made you the woman you are, the woman I love. Please.” He kissed her again when she didn’t respond. “Please, let me create new memories for you, a new future for us both. Together we can do that. I know it. If you trust me. If you can open your heart to me.”