Duality: Vol 1, Melancholia (A New Adult Paranormal Romance) (22 page)

Rae and I laughed.  She looked at me and then quickly turned away.  For the brief moment that our eyes met, I noticed surprise.  Like she was shocked to find me back there with her.  I worked pretty hard at staying invisible, but it kind of burned my chest a little to know I was doing that well at it with her.  I shrugged the feeling away, knowing it was for the best.

“No, you don’t have a zit, idiot.  But if you keep saying clueless shit like that I’m gonna nail you with a boulder like you did to me when I was just a baby and give you another eye socket.”

“First of all, it wasn’t a boulder for chrissake.  And second, you weren’t a baby, you were fully grown with the same big butt you have now.  And third, you guys heard her.  Threatening me with physical violence.”  He pointed a finger near her face.  “That’s assault.”

“No,
this
is assault,” Jasmine said, grabbing his finger and bending it backwards.

“Ahh!  Back, you gnarly beast, back!”  He yanked his hand away and ducked to the left, barely paying attention to his driving as he waved his elbow in her general direction.

“Eyes on the road,” I reminded him.

“Yeah.  Eyes on the road,” Kootch said in a bratty voice to Jasmine.  “Leave me be, wild woman.”

“All three eyes,” Jasmine mumbled.

Rae snorted.

“So where is this party?” I asked, sneaking a glance at Rae.  She kept her eyes forward.

“Just a few blocks away,” said Kootch.  “Two minute countdown to party time.”  He started banging his hands on the steering wheel, keeping time to some music that must’ve been playing in his head.

“Are either of you guys sore from the accident?” Jasmine asked, twisting in her seat to look at us.

I shook my head.

“No, I’m fine,” said Rae, looking at me for a second before facing Jasmine again.  I hated that she was purposely not looking at me, and I hated even more that I cared.

“That’s good,” said Jasmine.  “I wonder what Brody’s doing right now.  Probably crying in his sleep over his stupid penis car.”

“Hey, what accident?  What are you guys talking about?”  Kootch slowed down, looking at Jasmine.

“Brody’s car got smashed when they were in it,” she explained.

Kootch stopped altogether, several feet before the upcoming stop sign.  “What?!  How do you know this and I don’t?”  He turned to face me.  “Dude, what’s your problem?”

“What?  What’d I do?”

“You’re supposed to tell me major shit like that.  It’s Dude-Code.  Total fail, man.  Total fail.  Someone tell me why he’s in my car.”

Before I could respond, Jasmine butted in.  “Dude-Code?  Oh, God, please don’t share.  It doesn’t matter anyway.  They’re fine, see?  Let’s just go to the party, and I’ll drink some beers for you, okay?”

“No,” said Kootch, putting the car in first and pulling up to the stop sign.  “If I can’t drink, neither can you, Butts.  You’re the co-pilot.  Co-pilots can’t drink.”

“Eff that.”

“No, not eff that.  Drink and you find another ride home.  My car, my rules.  Besides, you’re supposed to be Miss Cool Straight-Edge.  You can’t drink.”

Kootch pulled into the intersection, going slow as he reached the other side, his eyes swinging left and right.  “The place is here somewhere.  Can you guys see the addresses?”

Jasmine pointed out the windshield.  “Any chance it might be up there were the ten thousand cars are parked?”

Kootch frowned at her before downshifting and giving the car more gas.  We went two blocks before he parked and responded.

“Arrive alive, that’s my motto.  Now everyone out so I can lock my baby up.”  He threw the door open and yelled, “Wooo hooo!!  Party time!!”

“Shut up, asshole!” came a voice from across the lawn.

We all snickered as we got out of the car.

“What’s his problem?” grumbled Kootch.  “Just trying to have a little fun.”

“Maybe they want the party to last a little longer.  You know, not piss off the neighbors?” suggested Jasmine.

“Oh. Yeah.”  Kootch walked with his head down for a few paces after locking up the car.

“Don’t worry about it, Kootch,” said Rae, walking a step behind him and just in front of me.  “A party’s not a party until someone’s whooping it up, right?”

Kootch smiled big at her.  “Exactly what I was thinking, right?  Fuck that guy.”  He opened his mouth to yell again, but Rae’s hand on his arm stopped him.  The shout came out as a burst of air followed by a weak whine at the end.

“What the hell was that?” asked Jasmine, laughing.

“Uhhh … I don’t know,” said Kootch, staring at the place where Rae’s hand had been.

I tried not to be jealous of the fact that she was making such an effort where he was concerned and was so obviously doing the opposite with me.  Had my question freaked her out?  Did I push too hard? 
Probably
.  I had zero experience with girls other than to run away from them far and fast.  The one time I hadn’t was more than enough to feed my nightmares for years to come.  Why was I trying to start another nightmare?   I slowed down to put more distance between us.

“Come on, Cy, let’s go find some Coke.”  Jasmine grabbed Kootch’s sleeve and pulled him down the sidewalk.

“Coke?  I thought we were straight edge tonight.  And don’t call me Cyclops or I’ll call you something worse.”

“First of all you can’t be straight edge just for a night.  And second, I’m talking about the drink.  Stop being a dumbass, would ya?”

Their voices faded as the distance between us grew.  I didn’t want to stay too close, preferring to hang back and watch.  Rae seemed to be doing the same thing, although she was making sure to stay ahead of me.

Kootch’s response to Jasmine’s comment was lost in the sounds spilling out of the door that had just opened ahead of us.  Apparently, we’d reached party central.

Kootch turned around and walked backwards, holding up his arms.  “Party people in da houuuuse toniiiight!”

Rae stopped walking.

I came up next to her and stopped too.  “You okay?” I asked, not looking at her.  I didn’t want to spook her like I had with my text. 
Play it cool.  Act like you really don’t care.

“I think so,” she said, not sounding very sure at all.

“Just stick with me and you’ll be fine.”  I wanted to take her hand so badly.  My fingers tingled with the need.  But I didn’t.  I stayed right where I was, not looking at her.  Sweat broke out at my temples.

She laughed nervously.  “I’m not so sure about that.”

I turned my head to look at her.  “I’m not going to bite you, you know.  I’m not a vampire.”

She looked at me, a grin creeping out.  “That’s too bad.”

I raised an eyebrow.  “You want someone to suck the life out of you?”

She shrugged, the humor disappearing from her face.  “Sometimes it sounds like a really good idea, actually.”

Damn it all and everything she might be thinking. 
I was going to do this.  I sighed heavily, reaching down to grab her hand.  “Believe me, it’s a bad idea.  Come on.”

She didn’t resist, but she didn’t hold on to me either.  “What do you know about vampires and death?” she asked, staying even with me as we walked up the front steps to the door.

“I know enough about darkness to know you don’t want to go there.”  We stepped through the entrance behind Jasmine and Kootch, the blast of noise immediately pouring over us and shutting out any chance of a normal conversation.

I quickly lost Jasmine in the mix, but I could still see Kootch’s head and arms lifted up to the sky.  He was very determined to make sure everyone knew the party prince had finally arrived.

I pulled Rae through the throng of kids, most of whom I didn’t know or even recognize.  There were people here from another school district, competing colors all over the place.

“Come on,” I shouted, “let’s go out back.”  The pressing need of all these kids, some of them very unhappy people, was already making me nervous.

Rae offered zero resistance.  She pressed into me when the crowd got too thick and moved behind me, putting her other hand on my back.  I twisted my arm around so we could keep contact while we pushed our way through.

The thrill that buzzed every nerve ending in my body over touching her made me feel like a goofy jerk, but I didn’t care.  I hadn’t been this close to a girl in a long time, and I’d never been close to someone like Rae before.  Ever.

We finally made it to the back door and went outside, joining about fifty other people around a totally decked-out pool area.  There was a built-in barbecue with accompanying outdoor kitchen, colorful awnings, a tiki hut bar, and several tables and chairs set up around in groups.  No one was in the pool yet, but I could tell it wasn’t going to stay empty for long.  People just needed a little more alcohol and clothes were either going to come off or get soaked.

I brought Rae over to the outskirts of a lighted area, near the back part of the yard and the fence that went around it.  We could see everyone inside the house through the back windows and all the kids hanging around the pool with no obstructions.  One of the famous kegs was off to our left near the grill with a huge group of guys around it and a few girls busy flirting for more beer and attention.

“Wow,” said Rae, pulling her hand away from mine.  “That was … interesting.”

I was sad that she’d broken contact, but it probably would have been weird to keep holding hands when it wasn’t necessary anymore, especially since she’d been working so hard at not even looking at me earlier.

Questions burned in my brain.  The one from before and now one about why she was suddenly so afraid of me or not interested.  I didn’t ask her though, because I wasn’t sure I wanted to know the answers.  Not yet.  There was plenty of time for hurt feelings later.  For now I’d pretend we were friends who might be considering something else.  The fantasy shouldn’t be too hard to keep going for an hour.  That’s how long I was planning to stay.  An hour tops.

“So … you okay?” she asked me, looking at the pool.

“Yeah.  I’m fine.  You?”  I had no idea what she was talking about, so I just rolled with it.

“I’m fine.  No problem.  The accident wasn’t that bad.”  Her eyes were roaming around the backyard.  She was doing such a good job of acting like she could care less about our conversation that I was starting to believe I’d imagined any kind of connection before.  It made me sick to my stomach.

“Nah,” I agreed.  “Not bad for anyone but Dan and Brody, I guess.”

She dropped her gaze to the ground.  “Yeah.  Sucked for them.”

“Lucky for us Mr. Holder was there, right?”  It was a loaded question.  It didn’t feel lucky by the end of it.  More like really unlucky.

“Yeah.  Lucky.”

I held my breath for a few seconds, wondering if I should risk it.  “And weird, too, right?”

She stopped looking anywhere but her feet.  She just stared at them for a long time.  After a while it started to freak me out.

I let the breath out that I’d been holding in a big gust.  “I’m going to get a beer.  You want one?”  I had to get away from her so I could stop making a fool of myself.

“Yes.  Please.  Make it a double.”  She finally looked up and gave me a lopsided grin.  It made her dimple appear, and I felt like punching myself in the face when I saw it.

“Be right back.”  I took off.  I couldn’t bear to be near her for a single second longer.  She was a nice girl, and she didn’t want to acknowledge the darkness I brought with me.  She was just feeling sorry for me or something.  Why was I trying to force it on her?  Was I trying to turn her into some kind of fantasy savior?  It was the most ridiculous idea I’ve had in a long, long time.  Almost as ridiculous as the bullshit story I told the social worker about moving in with a friend.

I shoved that out of my mind as quickly as it appeared to taunt me.  I had a day and a half to figure something out that didn’t involve running away.  Right now, I was just going to spend the next forty-five minutes being confused by a girl who I had no hope of figuring out in the short time I’d be around her.  Maybe she’d already be gone by the time I was done getting our drinks.

I grabbed two big plastic cups as soon as my turn came up, shoving them under the spigot held by a football player.

“You pay yet?” he asked.

“Uh, no.  How much?”

“Five each, unlimited refills.  Give it to him.”  He pointed with the black nozzle at the skinny kid next to him holding a wad of cash.

I reached into my pocket and pulled out the last ten bucks to my name. 
I guess I’ll be drinking my next few meals tonight. 
“Fill them to the top, man.  I gotta drown my sorrows.”

He laughed, pressing the trigger and letting the yellow liquid flow into the cup.  “Any guy standing over there with that girl and drowning sorrows has gotta be gay.”  His head bobbed up and down slowly as the foam rose to the top.

I shook my head.  “Not me, man.”  I took several long pulls off the first glass, putting it down to join the second after I’d drained half of it.

He filled the second cup and then topped off the first.  I walked away, taking another huge gulp of my drink, thinking maybe if I got a buzz on I wouldn’t feel so shitty about what a complete loser I am.

“Thanks,” Rae said when I handed her the second cup.  She took several long swallows, wincing when she finally pulled it away from her mouth.  “Ew.  I hate beer, I think.”

I laughed a little.  “I can tell by the look on your face.  Why are you drinking it if you don’t like it?”

She shrugged, holding the cup with both hands at chest-level.  “I’ve never tried it before.  But I hear it’s an acquired taste, so I’m going to finish this before I make my decision.”  She lifted it to her lips and chugged a few more times.

“Better slow down or you’ll find your decision tainted by your buzz.”

She glanced up at me for a second before looking back at the beer.  “That’s what I’m hoping.”

We stood there and drank in silence for a few more minutes.  When she was done, I took her cup and went back to the keg, filling both of them up again.  I took the time to chug a full glass down while hers was being refilled, so I got two more instead of just one for myself.