“Yes, it’s over,” Marie said firmly.
“Tucky!” Laura’s eyes flew open. “Is Tucker all right?”
Tears were rolling down Tucker’s face. “I’m all right, you silly girl. But you scared me half to death!”
Laura’s eyes remained wide open. She reached up her hands to grasp something. Marie took them in hers. A frightened look came over Laura’s face.
“What is it?” she whispered. “What happened to me?”
Holding tightly to Laura’s hands, Marie bent close to her face and peered into her eyes.
“Is it night?” There was panic in Laura’s voice.
“What makes you ask, Laura?” Marie asked calmly.
“I don’t know. It’s different! It’s not dark!” She was beginning to tremble.
“It’s all right. Shut your eyes for a minute and open them slowly. Don’t be afraid and try not to move your head.”
“I’m afraid! I can see something! Am I dreaming? Am I dead?”
“Do you see something moving?” Marie moved her hand back and forth in front of Laura’s face.
“Yes! Is it my hand?” The words came with a sob.
“No. It’s my hand. I’ll take it away. Now do you see anything?”
“I see white. Everything is white!”
“You’re seeing the white cover over the wagon.”
“I can see your face! Oh, Lord! Marie, I see your face!”
“Don’t panic,” Marie said calmly. “And don’t cry. Tears will keep you from seeing. Lie still and blink your eyes.”
Marie moved and made room for Tucker. Tucker grabbed Laura’s hands. There was such a different look to the eyes that fastened on her face.
“Tucky! Oh, Tucky, I can see you! I really can. I can see your face and your hair like fire . . . you look like I thought you would only . . . prettier! Oh, I’m so glad I got to see you! Please . . . I’m afraid it will go . . . before I see Buck! I want to see Buck! Oh, Tucky, will it go before I see Buck?” Her voice was a wail of plaintive longing.
Tucker stumbled to the end of the wagon. “Buck!” she screamed. “Buck!” Her almost hysterical cries reached into every part of the camp. “Buck, come quick!”
Buck reached the end of the wagon in seconds, his face white, his heart pounding with dread. He was inside the wagon and on his knees beside Laura before Tucker could say anything. Laura’s eyes were open and her hands reached for him.
“Laura!
Mi vida!
Thank God!” He held her hands to his lips.
“Buck! My darling Buck,” she whispered. Freeing one of her hands she held it against his cheek. “You’re . . . beautiful!” Buck leaned closer and
looked at her eyes. “I can see you! Something wonderful has happened and I can see you!” She tried to smile. “Oh, Buck! I was so afraid it would go before I could see you!” Her lips quivered as if she would cry, but she held back and refused to let the tears dim what she was seeing. Buck’s lips moved, but no words came. He looked at Marie and she smiled.
“She’s right. Something wonderful happened. The blow she received today seems to have undone the damage she suffered long ago. I’ve heard of such a thing, but I never thought I would witness it.”
“Will she be all right?”
“I think so. The fact that she came out of the coma so quickly means there was no permanent damage.” Marie stepped out of the wagon.
Tucker bent down and kissed Laura’s cheek. “Laura, I’m so happy. Oh, honey, it’s so wonderful I can hardly believe it! I’m going to leave before I bawl. I don’t want you to see me all red-eyed and sniffling.” She kissed her again and hurried away.
Left alone with Laura, Buck gripped her hands and smoothed the wet hair back from her forehead, being careful of the wound on the side of her head. She smiled at him palely, her eyes open wide and clear—smoke-fringed blue eyes miraculously come back to life and seeing him, truly seeing him. He felt suddenly shy.
“Buck.” Laura spoke quietly. “Everything seems so . . . strange.” An age seemed to pass before she said anything more, an age of tense uncertainty for Buck. Her eyes were fastened on his face, steady and
intently probing. “There were many things I wanted to see, but I wanted to see you most of all.” She blinked, trying not to cry. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen a man, I pictured you as . . . older.” Her lips quivered and she lifted her hand to his cheek. “You’re so handsome! . . . I never thought I’d see your . . . dear face!” Buck didn’t know what to say. “It seems like I don’t know you, you’re so beautiful,” she whispered. “I think I want to shut my eyes and listen to you talk to me so I’ll know it’s you!” Her face crumbled, the effort to hold back the tears failed. “Now . . . I’m scared you won’t want me, even if I can . . . see!” There was pain, anguish, pleading in her voice.
A growl of protest came from his throat. “Won’t want you?” He bent and kissed her tenderly on the mouth. The kiss lasted a long time and was full of sweetness. “You’re the only thing I have ever loved. I didn’t know what love was until I met you. You are my heart—my soul—my everything!” His humbled voice vibrated with emotion.
“You’re . . . sure?” she asked shakily.
“I was never so sure of anything in my life!” His voice was a soft purr of happiness, and he bent to kiss her again.
Laura closed her eyes for only a second. She wanted to look and look at him. Gently she lifted his face and cupped it in her two hands.
“Darling Buck, I’m just now beginning to believe that I can see,” she whispered. “Oh, Buck! Just think . . . I’ll see the mountains and everything
between here and California. And Blue! I’ll see Blue and . . . Lucas and Lottie, and . . . I’ll see a tree! And . . . I’ll see myself! Tucker said I was pretty, but I never believed her.” She began to cry.
Sobs caught in Buck’s throat. He swallowed repeatedly.
“You can believe me,
mi alma
! You are more than pretty. You are beautiful! When I first saw you, I thought you were the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. Even if you were not, you are my life. You will see everything with me beside you, loving you, taking care of you.” He lowered his head, not wanting her to see the tears in his eyes. He kissed her gently again and again and whispered to her about the life they would share.
* * *
The day was spent in celebration. At intervals during the day every member of the train was allowed to climb into the wagon so Laura could see them. There was much laughter from tear-streaked faces as she greeted them and exchanged some bits of chitchat with them. Through it all she held on to Buck’s hand as if he were the only solid thing in her reeling world. His face, weary and haggard only hours before, was relaxed and smiling. And his eyes, when they rested on Laura, were adoring.
The train would not move until Marie decided it would be safe for Laura and the wounded men to travel. With that in mind, the camp settled into a new routine. The stock was moved to fresh grass, wheels were repaired, bedding aired, wagons cleaned and
rearranged. Laura and Tucker would take over Marie’s wagon, and she and Billy would move in with Rafe. It seemed the natural thing to do.
Later that night Tucker and Lucas stole away for a few quiet minutes alone.
“Should you be walking on that leg, darling?” Tucker put her arm around him and lifted his arm to her shoulders.
“I’d walk on a stub to get out here alone with you,” he said as he pulled her into his arms and kissed her for a long, exquisite moment. He raised his head and she saw the love glowing in his eyes. She felt as if she hadn’t been in his arms for months, hadn’t kissed him in years. This was the man she loved, the other part of herself. She snuggled her face into the curve of his neck so her lips were against his skin.
“I love you, you . . . wild man, you! I was never so scared or so proud as when you charged that . . . bunch of—”
“Bastards?” he whispered with a chuckle. “You can say it, just this one time.”
She laughed and wrapped her arms around him, hugging him fiercely to her.
“Just one time?”
“As I’ve said . . . you need a firm hand, Tucker Red.”
She looked into his face with undisguised hunger. Their love glowed in unspoken communication. Each could read what was in the thoughts of the other.
“I love you,” she said suddenly, unable to hold the words back any longer.
Smiling into her sparkling eyes, Lucas ran his hand down her body in a soft caress. His wandering fingers found the buttons on her shirt and his hand slipped inside. Passion flared. He found her mouth, and his kisses became hot and bold.
“Talk, talk, talk! There’s only one way to stop you,” he said with tender rebuke. His mouth came down again and seized hers in a crushing, consuming kiss. “Good Lord, how I love you,” he rasped.
Laughing with ebullient joy, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “I love you, too,” she whispered against his lips. His hands came up to frame her face and he searched the depths of her eyes. She repeated the words with all the passion of a woman truly in love.
“I don’t know if I can wait till we get to El Paso,” he whispered between snatches of kisses.
“Why El Paso?”
“That’s where I’m going to marry you. I want you in my bedroll so I can love you every night.”
“What’s wrong with soft prairie grass?” she whispered innocently.
“You mean . . . now?”
“Why not? You’ve already introduced me to the wicked pleasures of the flesh!” Her eyes twinkled to match the stars above. She gave him a cheeky grin.
“But . . . those damned britches!”
“You’d be surprised at how easily they come off.”
“Then get to working on it, woman,” he growled. “I can’t wait much longer.”
June 3.
Yesterday, June 2, 1859, we arrived in El Paso. The town is made up of small adobe houses, most of which lie across the Rio Grande River in Mexico. On the north side there are several settlements. Two days ago we passed Fort Quitman, but didn’t linger because a company of soldiers offered us escort to El Paso. I record these events first, but they seem unimportant compared to the entries that will follow.
All those who were injured in the fracas one day out of Fort Davis have recovered. Laura Foster, who regained her sight, is doing well. She will continue to wear the smoked glasses Doctor Hook designed and Mr. Blanchet made for her.
Three weddings will be performed this afternoon. Laura Foster will wed Buck Garrett, the wagon train scout. I, Tucker Houston, will wed Lucas Steele, the wagon master. Doctor
Marie Hook and Rafe Blanchet informed Mr. Steele this morning that they also wish to wed.
I have to add a personal note here, because to those not on this journey, and perhaps even to us looking back someday, things may seem to have happened very quickly. But out here on the prairie, fighting for survival, each day stretches into forever, and life becomes more precious as it becomes more precarious. It gets easier, somehow, to distinguish the essential things in life from the unimportant.
July 14.
Almost three months from the day the wagon train left Fort Worth, Texas, it arrived in Coopertown, California. The little town is located in a lush valley between two tall mountains. Mr. Steele stopped the train for a day outside of town, and all the women bathed, washed their hair, and put on dresses, the first they had worn since the weddings in El Paso. The group was obviously excited after having traveled hundreds of miles through the wilderness in search of a dream. But they are all stronger, surer women now, with their hearts full of joy but with their feet planted firmly on the ground.
April 15, 1860.
This is the final entry in this journal. I have waited a year to record these events. When the
prospective wives arrived in Coopertown, they were housed in barracks put up temporarily for that purpose. Several social functions were arranged in order for the single men in the community to meet them. There was no pressure put upon the women to choose husbands; however, within a month there was not an unmarried woman left in town. Emma Collins married a farmer who loved children. Mrs. Shaffer also married a man who accepted her child. It was believed that Mustang was in the running for Lottie’s hand, but she married a big German who wanted to start a freight line. Coopertown gained a teacher in Rafe Blanchet and a doctor in his wife, Marie. The Taylors built a fine new house, and Mr. Taylor plans to go into the banking business.
Laura and Buck Garrett were called to the ranch of Buck’s grandfather. The old man was frail and dying. Buck Garrett inherited the vast holding and is now a rich and influential man in California.
Lucas Steele and I, Tucker Steele, bought land next to the Rancho Lauralita, as Buck renamed his grandfather’s ranch in honor of his wife. We are building a home. We have only a cabin at this time, but plan to have the two-storied log structure complete by the time our baby arrives a month from now. We see Laura and Buck often. Laura is looking forward to the birth of her own child in the summer.
We are planning a reunion of all the people who made the trip west with us. At the reunion I will read this journal and relate events that I have, so far, told only my husband.
Tucker Houston Steele
April 15, 1860
Coopertown, California