Divine (7 page)

“Being a doctor will do it for you?” Cadence
sipped her coffee and tilted her head. “No nursery or petting
zoo?”

A gorgeous genius, Cadence already did a
kick-ass job as an allergist. She possessed an air that kept her
world on a similar level, fun yet annoying. With the potential to
see the truth within a person, to see what they needed, she
questioned them until they admitted it! Relentlessly! Like now!
Trina couldn’t let her know the doubts she had concerning her
decision to become a doctor. Hell, who changes up after investing
so much time into their future? “Yes, really. The brain fascinates
me. Can I study yours?”

“Don’t think you’d want to see what’s hiding
in there. It’s scary!” Cadence giggled and covered an ear with her
free hand.

She laughed.

“I don’t get it. Can you look me in the eye
and tell me you didn’t go after your childhood dream because of
your parents’ brainwashing? Come on. I know they forced you into
doing things, just like they try to force everyone to do their
will. I mean, think about it. Would you have gone out with Cal
without your mother’s persistent nagging?”

She didn’t want to think. She wouldn’t have.
He kept her busy, a nice distraction. Sweet and caring, he provided
her with plenty of attention. When he pushed for intimacy, she
discouraged it. Then one day she’d blurted, “I’m saving myself for
marriage. I want my husband to be my one and only.”

The declaration had held him off.

Until… now.

“I wished I had said no immediately.”

Cadence rolled her head backwards then slowly
brought it forward. “Yep!” she said, emphasizing the ‘p’ sound.
“You’re a horrible, incorrigible person and I love you. You have to
come clean to Cal and Matt. More importantly, to yourself.” She
pinched her lips together. “You’re in love with Matt, not in lust.
He’s not your buddy. He’s the guy you’ve always wanted. It’s about
time you face it and act on it.”

She stared into her coffee cup, tears
streaming down her face. Messed up, dating the wrong man. An ache
penetrated every inch of her skin. The exact reason she couldn’t
become a Marine’s girlfriend nipped her in the butt anyway. She
couldn’t handle it. Yet, she had gone and done exactly what she
feared. She fell so deeply in love with Matt, she became his
girlfriend without him asking. No other man had a chance.

“Sweetie, I’m not sure what you’re doing or
if you even know, but you need to take Cal’s ring off. It’s wrong,
it's just wrong. You can’t lead a guy on this way.”

The alarm in Cal’s features when she didn’t
accept it immediately ratcheted more guilt. She stupidly allowed
him to slip the sparkling two-carat diamond on her finger.

Explaining her feelings toward him with an
audience wouldn’t have been fair. She didn’t love him, but he
didn’t deserve her rejection in front of others. Their discussion
didn’t need outside input. Her mother wouldn’t have let her say
much before she stuck her nose in the middle. “Wait!” She set her
cup on the table near the couch, wiped her cheeks, and shot to her
feet. “I didn’t tell Cal I’d marry him. I’m giving him my answer at
lunch today. I would have said no last night, if—”

“If it hadn’t been for your mother,” Cadence
finished for her. “She threw you under the bus. At every turn, she
dictates what you should do. Sweetie, you have to stop allowing
her. I know you want to be a good daughter, and you fought this
good daughter-bad daughter image for years, but it’s time. Be
honest and set Trina free.”

Her friend was right. She broke free in so
many ways. She wore lounge clothes of cotton, not silk, not lace,
or from an expensive designer store. No crystal, fine china, or
status-packed figurines lined her furniture or shelves of her
shared apartment, and no items screamed ‘look at me, I’m rich.’

The furry pillows with flowers on them, the
‘I love animals’ blanket tossed on the arm of the chair. The
hand-carved end table she purchased from a store in Pennsylvania,
she loved these things. They put her on the happy bandwagon.
“Putting those accusations on me about my mom is wrong. I don’t
live under my parents’ thumbs anymore.”

Cadence grumbled and set her coffee cup on
the table.

Not a good sign. She never relinquished her
coffee except for…a lecture.

Cadence grasped hers shoulders. “You’re the
sister I never had. I love you and I will always be here for you.
You can’t lose me, but you can lose the only man you’ve ever cared
about. Matt is in Afghanistan. He can’t control when he can or
can’t contact you, but you know in here,” Cadence touched a finger
to Trina’s chest, “that he’s there. You’ve always known. My fear is
Matt will somehow find out you put another man’s ring on your
finger. You’ll ruin any chance you might have with him.”

“That’s ridiculous. How will he find out?
Besides, plenty of people changed their minds. They get engaged,
then call it off, get divorced, and find the one person they should
have never let go.”

“Sweetie, I’ve seen Matt. I’ve seen the way
he watches you, the way you watch him. If half of what you’ve
voiced about him is accurate, which I don’t doubt for a second,
then he won’t.”

She listened, believed her, but… “What if
he’s moved on? He hasn’t contacted me. What if,” she paused to
gather her thoughts. “What if all I’m supposed to have is nice? Cal
is a good guy, a nice person. I have to wonder if I’m blowing my
chance for a complacent life for something which may never happen.”
Even as the words came out, a feeling crept over her telling her
she was wrong.

“Let me ask you something. Will the woman who
had to be at the top of her class, the woman who chose one of the
hardest professions in medicine, be okay with complacent? Will you
be content with okay sex and never feel the big bang of love?”
Cadence released her shoulders, dropped to the couch, and grabbed
her coffee. “I sure as hell wouldn’t be.”

No, but Cadence didn’t rely on facts, and the
facts were she hadn’t heard from Matt. “Which is your decision.
Matt and I haven’t agreed to wait for one another. We never said
we’d be together. We made no promises.”

“Didn’t you, though? Didn’t he say next time,
there would be no stopping?”

“Meaningless words from a man going into the
military,” she said offhandedly.

“Was it?” Cadence, the voice of honesty,
plucked the last bit of her doubt.

Nearly choking on the emotion clogging her
throat, she rubbed a hand against the ache. “Cadence, he hasn’t
contacted me in a year! If he was interested, he would have
called.”

“Not necessarily. You’re giving up too quick.
Losing faith, hope. This is not the person I know.”

Oh, God, did she give up too soon? Matt’s
words had been so earnest. Was the distance over the ocean to blame
for them not talking to one another? Still, it didn’t make sense.
For the first three years, they communicated every week, then poof,
he stopped. She’d checked the website every day for fallen men. His
name wasn’t there, so why hadn’t she heard from him? Still, she
shouldn’t settle. Shouldn’t allow her parents to push her into
something she didn’t want. She managed to get out from under their
grasp some, but she had a ways to go. “You’re right.”

“And the ‘aha moment’ arrived!” Cadence
stood. “Finally! I worked up a sweat. I need a shower.”

Trina sat at a table on the outdoor patio of
Molly’s café, tapping her foot against the brick floor and
breathing in the aroma of hamburgers. She ran her hands over her
lap, smoothing the nonexistent wrinkles in her dress for the fifth
time.

Right thing or not, ending a relationship was
nerve-wracking.

The bright January day, mixed with her
disobedient thoughts, landed her with a headache.

A few tables filled a quarter of the patio
with parties of two. She’d chosen the most isolated table in the
corner, the least conspicuous.

“Hi!” said Tiffany, a twenty-something
server. Her white button-down shirt with brown spots and the faded
black pants had seen better days.

The last time she and Cal visited the café,
Tiffany had flirted with him.

The server glimpsed the empty chair in front
of the other place setting. “May I get you something while you—”
she stumbled as her attention landed on Trina’s hand, “wait for
your guest?”

Hell!
The ring did a walk-about on her
finger and now instead of the diamond facing her palm, hiding, it
flashed everyone. If she only had the damn box, she wouldn’t have
put it on so not to worry about losing it. She slid her thumb over
the stone and swung it back toward her palm. “Yes. A Cosmo,
please.”

“Sure thing.” The server left as Trina’s cell
rang.

On more than one occasion when she arranged
to meet Cal, he canceled because of an emergency at the hospital.
Hopefully, he wasn’t calling to postpone. Getting the courage to
return his ring tried her resolve. It wasn’t that she couldn’t. She
didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

Relieve her brother’s picture flashed on the
screen, she pushed the talk button. “Hi, Bradley!”

“H-e-ey,” he drew out the word low and rough,
the timbre he used when saying something she wouldn’t want to
hear.

She clasped her elbow to the hand, holding
the phone, and hugged her arm against her stomach. The beveled
glass top table held her gaze. “What?”

“I didn’t think. He was so excited.”

Blood pounded behind her ears.

“I couldn’t help but to jump in with both
feet and tell him.”

Afraid she now lived Cadence’s prediction,
she asked, “Who, Bradley?”

“Please don’t get mad. We hadn’t talked in
ages and I lost it. I don’t even know how he got my number.”

“Bradley.” Groaning, her impatience dug under
her skin.

“I told him you scheduled a lunch meeting at
Molly’s Café. I didn’t think before I said it.” A long sigh came
across the line. “I didn’t mean to cause problems. He tried calling
you, but your cell went straight to voice mail.”

“Bradley, no,” she said in a long breath.
“You didn’t tell Ma—”

“Hi, Trina!” The low, seductive voice came
from beside her.

Her muscles tensed. Excitement and dread each
fought for a stance. Matt’s voice zinged her body, excited her
nipples to beads, and caused her to squeeze her thighs together.
“Matt,” she breathed.

He looked good, too good. His worn jeans
clung to his muscular thighs. The navy blue pullover brightened his
heavenly eyes. Dreamy. His tanned face and five-o’clock shadow sent
her gotta-have-it alarm screaming off the rails. Gorgeous, more
striking than she remembered.

She sucked in a hard, deep breath, and tried
to reign in the excitement of seeing him, while battling the fear
Cal would arrive any minute.

“I owe you,” she whispered, instead of
yelling into the phone, and ended the call.

“You’re a sight.” Matt’s face brightened, his
grin infectious.

She wanted to rush into his arms but
refrained, afraid any moment Cal would show.

“Man, you’re beautiful,” he said, his tone
left no room to doubt his sincerity.

Her mouth watered and her head whirred. Matt
was hot. He’d always been, but he’d filled out even more. His
youthful features hardened into a man, a warrior, one that could
protect and would do so at any moment. She drooled.

He sent her the kind of appreciative glance a
guy gave a woman he held in admiration, not necessarily by her
beauty but for what he felt. Tingles raced over her body and forced
her feet to move. He engulfed her into a bear hug. A hug so tight
she didn’t think he’d let go. “I’ve missed you,” he said, his
whispered voice tight.

Ohmygod!
Her pebbled nipples relished
against his hardened chest. He didn’t just have a body that would
do any poster justice. No, it wasn’t just that exiting her. It was
him. He was her Matt. She slid her hands around him further,
squeezed tighter. “I’ve missed you so much!”

His chuckle vibrated her breasts, her hands.
The smart move would be to step back before they became any more of
a spectacle. She brushed a kiss to his jaw, ready to accept it may
have to be enough, when his lips captured hers. His taste and scent
filled her senses. She leaned into the kiss, her body ready to
shatter. His tongue slid into her mouth. Like the night by the
river, the time she didn’t act on what her body craved. Her panties
moistened.

“Are you wearing panties?” he whispered next
to her ear and his hands sliding down over her backside.

The last time she saw him, he’d asked her not
to wear any. That had been four years ago. “If I’d known I would
see you, I wouldn’t have.”
What am I doing?
She pulled her
lips inward, tried to keep the panic from registering on her face,
and eased away.

Matt tugged her chair out, and she returned
to her seat. She cradled her phone in her left hand, hiding the
band of the engagement ring.