Divided against Yourselves (Spell Weaver) (45 page)

“You know where Merlin is?” asked Stan. “But I thought—”

“No,” I corrected, “
I
don’t know. The Order does, though, doesn’t it?” I looked at Nurse Florence and Vanora. Neither answered immediately, presumably because Merlin was a highly classified subject.

“What makes you think Merlin could help?” asked Vanora evasively.

“You mean aside from the fact he is the only one I know, not counting high-level Annwn faeries, who might know more about magic than I do? Because of his unusual dual nature. His father was a demon, remember. In fact, Merlin told the original Taliesin once that Satan had intended Merlin to be an Antichrist, or at least so his mother told him. She thought she foiled that scheme by having him baptized, but Merlin knew better. The baptism helped, but he told my earlier self often that keeping his demonic side in check required constant self-discipline on his part.”

Nurse Florence nodded. “I’m not as expert as you are at interpreting this kind of thing, but looking into you, I can see the darkness. It looks to me much the way the past-life personality looks in Stan and Carla. Aside from being at the other end of the spectrum, it also looks like Jimmie inside of you—a totally separate personality.”

I did a quick check myself. “You’re right—and that may explain why my case is different from most. When I was first struggling with the chaos in my head following my awakening, Taliesin 1 appeared to me and told me, among other things, that my brain, not knowing what to do with all those memories of past lives, was interpreting each set of memories as a separate personality. What if my brain, having had that kind of experience already, is interpreting the darkness, which would just be temptation in most people, as an entirely separate personality?”

“Or your high power level is endowing the temptation with personality,” suggested Vanora. “Either way, it sounds as if it might be worth consulting with Merlin.”

“I agree,” said Nurse Florence, and then each looked at the other as if both were surprised to find themselves on the same side.

“There is just one problem,” continued Vanora.

“Only one?” I said facetiously.

“Yes…but it’s a big one. As you guessed, the Order does know where Merlin is, though we aren’t supposed to reveal that location. In this case, however, I think the urgent circumstances would justify our doing so.”

“That doesn’t sound like much of a problem.”

“Oh,
that
isn’t the problem. Bear with me. I’m sure you recall that it was Nimue, a renegade lady of the lake, who imprisoned Merlin. She used a combination of a confinement spell Merlin created himself and some of her own touches to trap him. No one has ever been able to figure out how to break the spell, and frankly the Order no longer tries, their assumption being that Merlin is probably insane by now and too dangerous to be let out.”

“That’s actually two problems,” I said dejectedly.

“Count them as you wish,” said Vanora. “Actually, I believe that healers as accomplished as Viviane and I, aided by your unique insights into mending shattered minds, could probably cure him if he proved to be insane. That still leaves us with the problem of getting him out in the first place.”

“Well,” said Gordy. “What’s the old expression? ‘The impossible just takes a little longer.’”

“I don’t know,” said Shar. “The problem is, Gordy, it sounds as if we don’t have much time.”

“Where and how is Merlin imprisoned?” I asked. “Let’s at least see if the situation provides any clue. Even if people have worked on it for centuries, it can’t hurt to have some fresh perspectives.”

“We can only have one, I’m afraid—yours!”
thought Vanora.
“The Order might understand why I have to tell you about Merlin, but they won’t understand my telling a large number of civilians, even if some of them are your men.”

“OK, then. Tell me what you can,”
I said reluctantly. I would have like to share the information with everyone, but I knew better than to try to argue Vanora out of her caution, and I was getting little jolts of pain from Jimmie, a potent reminder of how limited our time might be.

“The physical location tied to the trap is Bryn Myrrdin, to the east and a little to the north of Carmathen, where Merlin was born. He is said to be trapped in a cave there, but the cave is just a portal to Annwn, where the real trap is: an enormous tower of unbreakable glass, utterly without any imperfection through which Merlin could have escaped by shape-shifting.”

“When you say ‘unbreakable,’ what do you mean? What have people used on it in the past?”

Vanora gave me a laundry list of every destructive force known to humankind.

“
What? No one tried to nuke it yet?”
I thought.

“You know perfectly well that complex technologies don’t work in Annwn,”
replied Vanora.
“But as you can see, pretty much everything except weapons of modern warfare has been tried on the tower.”

“I can get magic to work on technology; perhaps I can get technology to work in a magical realm. It might not even take a nuke. For all we know, a machine gun might do the trick. Anything Nimue didn’t anticipate could conceivably—”

“Don’t even think about it,”
thought Vanora so vehemently that the connection between us almost broke.
“That is the very thing some of Annwn’s leaders are worried you might try. One of the great protections of Annwn is that technology doesn’t work in it, and they are not about to give up that advantage. Even contemplating such a thing might be enough to have one or more of them send assassins after you.”

“OK, OK, I won’t try that, but let’s make a quick trip to Carmathen and at least see where we stand.”

Making a quick trip with Nurse Florence or Vanora whisking me through Annwn would have been easy enough. It was deciding who else was going to go that made the process hard—and time consuming. Nurse Florence, Vanora, Jimmie—since he was helping to fend off the darkness—and I were a given. Beyond that, consensus broke down almost completely.

Carla wanted to go, even more after someone with loose lips—I suspect Gordy—told her that my love for her had been the product of magic. She desperately wanted to talk to me, so, with Vanora fussing in the background, I gave her the opportunity to talk. Ironically, once she had the chance, she didn’t really know what to say. (Having been there myself, I couldn’t help but sympathize.) Finally, she worked up to saying what she would never have forgiven herself for not saying.

“Tal, I know that somehow, without meaning to, I made you love me. I’m sorry that happened, but it doesn’t change the fact that I do love you—for real—and I have for months. Can we at least date and see what happens?” Carla was beautiful enough to have almost any guy she wanted; why did she have to fixate on me, especially now?

“Carla, I really do like you, and maybe something would happen eventually if we went out, but right now I’m in love with somebody else. Do you really want to be with a guy whose heart is somewhere else?”

“Yes,” she said, tearing up a little, “if that guy is you.”

Crap!

“How about this? Right now there is something seriously wrong with me. Let’s postpone this discussion until I know if someone can fix it. Right now I don’t know if I have anything to offer. I may end up under lock and key in some obscure part of Wales, and you’ll never even see me again.” The last touch of drama, which I intended to be a little tongue-in-cheek, pushed Carla too far, and she started crying, which meant I took her in my arms, which meant Vanora looked nothing short of exasperated—a look that didn’t soften when Carla announced that she was going with me.

“You need to rest,” insisted Vanora, “and this trip could be dangerous.”

“It was dangerous on the roof at Halloween, too,” snapped Carla, “so dangerous that I ended up possessed, or whatever, and then in a coma, and then possessed again…only that time you were fine with it. You even brought some of us on to the roof and into that very danger.”

“At Sam…Halloween you were already trapped,” said Vanora quietly, but with fire in her eyes. “If Taliesin’s efforts on the roof had failed, you would all have died anyway. All I did was bring you up so you could help him and have a chance at survival. Here the situation is different. You aren’t trapped. You can stay here and be in no danger at all. And that is what you are going to do, like it or not!”

“Really?” asked Carla, eyes flashing. “You’re going to have to hold me here by force…and that will make quite a story for the newspapers, won’t it? Especially since I’m supposed to be in the hospital!”

“Don’t threaten me, young lady!” I could tell Vanora was getting pretty close to exploding. “I can erase your memories of everything since you went into that coma and return you to the hospital with no one being any the wiser. That’s exactly what I will do, too, if you don’t stay here willingly.”

Even before her awakening, Carla had a little magic of her own, and I could feel energy building around her, as I was sure Vanora could as well. Though an untrained Carla would be no match for Vanora, the fact that she had magic might make it harder to do a clean memory erasure on her, especially if the erasure was involuntary.

“The way I see it,” began Nurse Florence, “if we can’t get Merlin out, or if he is benign when we do, there is no danger. If, on the other hand, Merlin is insane and attacks us, we will need all the help we can get.”

“No!” I said forcefully. “I made the mistake of letting people come to Awen on Samhain, people like Carla who shouldn’t have been there, and she paid the price. I’m not going to make the same mistake again. I’m with Vanora on this one.”

Carla looked at me as if I had rejected her again, but she was not going to be deterred. “Tal, who made you the boss of me? You do not tell me where I can and cannot go. And guess what? I would have come on Halloween, even knowing what was going to happen to me. I would have come to help you. I will come this time to help you.” She looked around, daring anyone to contradict her.

“David feels strongly that I should go,” said Stan. “He says that is the only way he can watch over you and me properly.”

“You have to take Dan. You and he need to spend time together so you can become friends again!”
insisted Jimmie.

“If you might have to face a crazy Merlin, then you need me and Zom,” observed Shar.

“If you are taking some of your…warriors, then you should take all of us, just in case,” insisted Gordy. “What if there are guards to overcome?”

“Merlin has never seen the power in my sword, so he won’t be expecting it,” put in Carlos. Considering Govannon had given Carlos’s sword a custom-made power, he was probably right.

“What if getting to Merlin involves picking locks?” asked Khalid. “You have to take me.” He noticed Vanora was glaring at him and added, “Remember, mad skills.”

“I’m going,” said Eva quietly. Like Carla, she could conceivably lend us her strength if needed, but she would be a serious distraction to me if I had to worry about her safety.

“Carla and Eva need to stay here,” I said firmly. “They are the most vulnerable to attack.” Carla looked angrily in my direction, and I could feel magic crackling around her again.

“Tal, earlier I offered Dan a demonstration of my self-defense skills, but perhaps you would like one as well,” Eva said with false sweetness.

“Eva, I can’t even guarantee you are safe with me, much less with Merlin.”

Well, if Carla hadn’t figured out from earlier who I was in love with, that statement would certainly make my feelings clear, but I couldn’t help that. She was going to find out eventually anyway.

“We are wasting precious time,” said Nurse Florence impatiently. “Tal is fine right now, but we don’t know for how long. How long Jimmie can function inside Tal is another wild card. We need to move now. Everyone is going, and that’s the end of it.”

I could tell Vanora was furious, especially since she had made clear earlier that she outranked Nurse Florence, but she apparently thought better of trying to argue further. After all, if there was any wisdom to be had from Merlin, Nurse Florence was right—we had to get it soon. I could feel spasms running through Jimmie every so often, and my own head was starting to ache.

Once we had reached that tenuous agreement, all that remained was for everyone to gather up what they needed, not a hard task, considering that most of the guys were wearing their weapons. I did notice a little argument between Eva and Carla over who should carry the ice sword, an argument resolved by Gordy grabbing it away from both of them. Was this argument the first fruits of Carla finding out it was Eva I loved? Only time would tell.

When we finally bounced into Annwn and out on Bryn Myrrdin (Merlin’s Hill), I realized we should have brought warmer clothing. The weather had been relatively mild for December the night we visited Glastonbury Tor, but this night wasn’t. The land was blanketed with snow; the wind tore at us like ice fangs, ripping right through our California clothing. Fortunately, Vanora was prepared to do what needed to be done, said the appropriate incantation, and opened the hidden cave in the side of the hill.

“Step through quickly, everyone,” she said briskly. “Then walk to the back of the cave. There is a fixed portal there that will take us back into Annwn, right at the spot Merlin’s tower is. Once we are there, we shouldn’t feel this cold any more.” Urged on more by the bleak winter weather than by her words, everyone got into the cave quickly and crowded to the back, after which Nurse Florence sealed the cave, and Vanora opened the portal. In less than a minute, we were back in Annwn, looking at the most incredible structure I had ever seen.