Delphi Complete Works of Anton Chekhov (Illustrated) (363 page)

SCENE II.

TRILETZKY and then VOINITZEV.

TRILETZKY (examining the money). It smells of a moujik... He’s done a lot of fleecing in his day, the rogue! What shall I do with this money? (To Vassily and Yakov.) Hey, there, hirelings! Vassily, call Yakov here. And you, Yakov, call Vassily here! Crawl this way! Lively!

YAKOV and VASSILY (approach Triletzky).

TRILETZKY. They’re in frock-coats! Oh, the deuce take you! You look quite like your masters! (Gives Yakov a rouble.) Here’s a rouble for you! (To Vassily.) And here’s a rouble for you! I give it to you because your noses are long.

YAKOV and VASSILY (bowing to him). Thank you, Nikolai Ivanitch!

TRILETZKY. Ah, you Slavs, why do you rock like that? Drunk, are you? You look like a couple of ropes. The general’s widow will give it to you, when she finds out! You’ll catch it across your snouts! (Gives each another rouble.) I give it to you because you’re called Yakov, and he Vassily, and the other way round! Bow down to me! (Yakov and Vassily °bey.) It’s a fact! And here’s another rouble for each of you because I am called Nikolai Ivanovitch and Ivan Nikolayevitch! (He gives them the roubles..) Bow down to me! So! See that you don’t spend it in drink! I’ll prescribe some bitter medicine for you! You look appallingly like your masters! Go on, and light the lanterns! March! I’ve had enough of you!

YAKOV and VASSILY (they leave him).

VOINITZEV (he walks across the stage).

TRILETZKY (to Voinitzev). Here’s three roubles for you!

VOINITZEV (takes the money, mechanically putting it into his pocket, and walks away into the depth of the garden).

TRILETZKY. Aren’t you going to thank me? (Ivan Ivanitch and Sasha come out of the house.)

SCENE III.

TRILETZKY, IVAN IVANITCH ANDSASHA.

SASHA (entering). My God! When will there be an end to this? And why hast Thou punished me so? This one is drunk, Nikolai is drunk, Misha, too... If you only feared God a little, even if you are not ashamed before men! Everyone looks at you! Do you think it’s comfortable for me to see everyone pointing a finger at you?

IVAN IVANITCH. How you are going on! Stop... You’ve quite confused me. Stop...

SASHA. It’s impossible to let you enter a respectable house! No sooner you’ve come in than you’re already drunk! It’s indecent! All the more, because you’re an old man. You should set them an example, and not drink as though you were one of them!

IVAN IVANITCH. Stop, stop . . . you’ve confused me... What sort do you think I am? Yes, I shan’t lie to you, Sasha. Upon my word, if I had served another five years, I would have been a general! What, you don’t think I would have been a general? Fie! . . . (He laughs.) I’ve got the proper character to be a general. And the proper education too! Don’t you understand these things? Ah, you don’t understand. That’s clear...

SASHA. Let us go! Generals don’t drink like this.

IVAN IVANITCH. Everybody drinks from joy! Yes, I could have been a general! Be silent, please5 do me the favour! You’re your mother all over! Zu-zu-zu . . . I swear by God, she was like that! She went on buzzing away, day and night, day and night... If it wasn’t one thing, then it was another... Zu- zu-zu . . . Ah, you don’t know me! As for you, my pet, you are your dead mother all over! All of you . . . all... Your eyes, and your hair... And you walk like her, like a little goose... It’s terrible how I loved your dead mother! [The Lord has taken her away! Forgive me. Forgive me, Sasha! I didn’t guard your mother. ... I, old clown that I was, let death come to her! ]

SASHA. Enough of this... Let us go. Seriously, though, papa . . . it’s time for you to leave drink and scandal-mongering alone. Leave it to those healthy bucks... They are young, but it does not become you, an old man. . . .

IVAN IVANITCH. I hear you, my dear! And I understand! [From this minute not a drop! You’ve issued your commands, and the shade of your mother is on your side.] ... I hear you... And I shan’t do it again... Yes, yes ... I understand. What sort d’you think I am?

TRILETZKY (to Ivan Ivanitch). Your Honour, here are a hundred copecks for you! (Gives him a rouble.)

IVAN IVANITCH. So . . . [Young man, aren’t you the son of Colonel Triletzky?]

[TRILETZKY. I am he! ]

[IVAN IVANITCH. In that case, I’ll take it! (He laughs.)] I’ll take it, my son! Merci. ... I wouldn’t take it from a stranger, but I’d always take it from my own son... I’ll take it, and make joy of it. ... I have no love, my children, for the finances of others. God knows, what little love I have for them! I am honest, children! Your father is honest! Not once in my life have I robbed my country or the Penates. And all I had to do to get rich and famous was to slip my hand in somewhere, just a little. [I was in the war . . . thousands, and hundreds of thousands of roubles passed through my hands, but not a copeck would I touch of what belonged to the Russian Empire. ... I made my salary alone do. . . .]

TRILETZKY. That’s praiseworthy, father, but it’s not necessary to boast about it.

IVAN IVANITCH. I’m not boasting, Nikolai! I’m sermonizing! Explaining, that’s all. ... I shall answer for you before the Creator!

TRILETZKY. Where are you going now?

IVAN IVANITCH. Home. I’m escorting this dragon-fly. ‘Take me home,” she says, “take me home.” . . . She wouldn’t let me have any peace. ... So what was one to do? She’s frightened all alone. I’ll escort her home, and come back.

TRILETZKY. By all means, come back. (To Sasha.) And shall I give you something too? Of course, you must have something too! Here are three silver roubles for you.

SASHA. Make it five. I want to buy a pair of summer trousers for Misha. He has only one pair. It’s disgusting having only one pair! While it’s being washed, it’s necessary to put on a woollen pair...

TRILETZKY. If I were in your place, I shouldn’t let him have either summer ones or woollen ones. I’d let him manage the best he knows how! But what’s one to do with you? Well, have your five, if you must have them! (He gives her the money.)

IVAN IVANITCH. What sort d’you think I am? Yes . . . I remember... Well, yes ... I served on the general staff, my children. ... I used my head against the enemy, I used my brains to spill Turkish blood. ... I don’t know much about the bayonet... Well, yes . . .

SASHA. Why are you stopping? It’s time to go. Goodbye, Kolya! Let us go, papa!

IVAN IVANITCH. Stop! Be silent, for Christ’s sake! Tar-tar-tar . . . That’s how one should live, my children! Honestly, decently, irreproachably... Yes, yes ... I received the Order of Vladimir of the third degree... [Not the second, the second has a star... The third . . . Here it is ... on my neck... Do you see it, Sasha? Here it is... And here is the order of St. Anna, and here of Stan- islav... The St. Anne is of the third degree, with swords... Here is the order of Roumania... And here, heaven knows why, is the Persian Lion and Sun. Medals . . . One I received for saving some men from death... It’s the silver one. ... In the sixty-third year I saved the wife of the regimental doctor from drowning by pulling her out of the water by her hair... And there’s the military cross of St. George. ... I received it before Sebas- topol, on the very day you, Nicolai, were born.] [The Emperor Alexander Nikolayevitch knew my family. Three times I was sent to the main headquarters during the war... “Long in the service, Triletzky?” . . . “Thirty-one years, Your Imperial Highness!” “It’s not for you to salute me. Go, and God be with you!”] [May God grant you the same good fortune, my children. My time is past. Well, enough! . . . Now for a coffin, and for mass... Your old man is all unscrewed, gone to pieces.]

SASHA. You’ve said enough, papa! Let’s go!

TRILETZKY. Even without all this discourse we know the sort of man you are... Now go, take her home!

IVAN IVANITCH. You’re a very clever man, Nikolai! As clever as Pirogov!

TRILETZKY. Go, go!

IVAN IVANITCH. That’s the sort I am! Yes, I saw Pirogov too... That was in Kiev... Yes, yes . . . A clever man... Not bad at all... Well, Pm going... Let’s go, Sasha. I am not at all what I was... I’m fit only for a funeral... Oh Lord, forgive us sinners! . . . Well, yes . . . I’m a sinner, my children! Now I serve Mammon, but when I was young [I played the roles of Pet- chorin and Bazarov], I did not pray to God... No man was more a Bazarov than I... Oh, Lord... Well, yes . . . Pray that I may not die, my children! So you’ve started, Sasha? Where are you? Oh, there you are... Let’s go...

ANNA PETROVNA (looks into the window).

TRILETZKY. Why don’t you go? You’ve said an awful lot... Move on! But don’t go past the mill, or the dogs will get you.

SASHA. Kolya, you’re wearing his cap. Give it to him, or he’ll catch a cold.

TRILETZKY (takes the cap off and puts it on his father’s head). Now, old man . . . left . . . turn about . . . march!

IVAN IVANITCH. Left . . . half turn . . . march! Yes, yes. You’re just, Nikolai! God sees that you are just. And your brother-in-law Mikhail is just! He’s a free-thinker, but just. I’m coming, coming... (They go.) Let’s go, Sasha... Are you coming? If you like, I’ll carry you!

SASHA. What nonsense!

IVAN IVANITCH. Let me carry you! I always carried mother... There I would be carrying her, and myself reeling... Once we rolled down a hillock together... The dear only laughed, and didn’t get angry at all... Come, let me carry you!

SASHA. Don’t be silly... Put on your hat properly (She rearranges his cap.) Quite a lad, aren’t you?

IVAN IVANITCH. Yes, yes . . . (They go away.) (Enter Petrin and Stcherbook.)

SCENE IV.

TRILETZKY, PETRIN AND STCHERBOOK.

PETRIN (comes out of the house arm in arm with Stcherbook). You just put before me fifty thousand roubles, and I’d steal the money... Upon my word, I’d steal it. ... If only I could do it without being caught ... I’d steal it... And if the money were put before you, you’d steal it too.

STCHERBOOK. NO, I wouldn’t, Gerasya! No, not I! PETRIN. I’d steal even a rouble! Honesty? Bah! Who wants your honesty? An honest man is a fool.

STCHERBOOK. A fool, am I? . . . Well, I’m a fool, then. . . .

TRILETZKY. Here is a rouble a piece for you, old ones! (Gives them the money.) PETRIN (taking the money). I’ll take it...

STCHERBOOK (laughing, takes the money). Merci, Mister Doctor!

TRILETZKY. Have you been bibbing, esteemed gentlemen?

PETRIN. A trifle.

TRILETZKY. Well, here’s another rouble for you. That’s to pay for prayers for your souls. Sinners, aren’t you? Take it. Properly, one ought to thumb one’s nose at you, but for the sake of the holiday I’ll be generous, the deuce take it! [Here’s still another rouble for the pair of you, because both of you put together aren’t worth a two-hundredth of this rouble!]

ANNA PETROVNA (in the window). Triletzky, give me a rouble too! (Withdraws from sight.)

TRILETZKY. I’ll give you not one rouble, but five; you being a major general’s widow! In a jiffy! (Goes into the house.)

PETRIN (looks at the window). Has the fairy hidden herself?

STCHERBOOK. Yes, she’s hidden herself. PETRIN. I can’t stand her! She’s not a good woman. Too much pride. ... A woman ought to be quiet, respectful... (He shakes his head.) Have you seen Glagolyev? Isn’t he a scare-crow? He sits like a mushroom on one spot, all silent, staring with his eyes! Is that the way to court the ladies?

STCHERBOOK. He’s out to marry one! PETRIN. He marry? When? A hundred years from now? I most humbly thank you! A hundred years from now wouldn’t appeal to me.

STCHERBOOK. What can he, an old man, be thinking of, marrying at his age? [And he wants to marry her, what cheek!] If he fancies marrying, why doesn’t he marry some simple soul? [What does she want of such a stick for a husband? Never fear, if she marries him, it won’t be for love of him. It’s his wealth that’ll tempt her... And] he’s no match for her... She’s young, fiery, an educated European lady. . . .

PETRIN. If he’d only marry! I can’t tell how much I’d give to see them married! Why, since the general died — the Kingdom of Heaven be his! — they have almost nothing. She has some mines, but Vengero- vitch has his eyes on them... How am I to compete with Vengerovitch? What’s the good of my protesting my note now . . . what will I get?

STCHERBOOK. Nihil.

PETRIN. But if she’d only marry Glagolyev, then I’d know where to get my money... I’d protest my note, put a distrainer on the property... Never fear, she won’t let her step-son lose out, she’ll pay up. Ah-h-h! May my dream come to pass! Sixteen thousand, Pavotchka?

STCHERBOOK. And three thousand for me... My worthy spouse has ordered me to get it... How am I to get it? I can’t ask for it. It isn’t as if they were moujiks... They are friends... Let her go herself and collect the money... Let’s go into the wing, Gerasya. PETRIN. Why?

STCHERBOOK. There are women dancing in there. . . .

PETRIN. And is Dunyasha in the wing?

STCHERBOOK. Yes, she’s there. (They go.) It’ll be cheerful with them... (Sings.) How unhappy am I, no longer living there!

PETRIN. Tick-tock, tick-tock... (Shouts.) Ye-s-s! (Sings.) The new year joyously we meet in a gathering of friends true... (Exit.)