“I’ll tell you, but don’t pull away.”
I nodded.
“Annie’s ghost visited me the day after the outbreak. That was the first time. When did she die?”
Blood roared in my ears. I lowered my eyes, just an inch, to the sharp line of his cheekbone.
“She persuaded me to leave Europe,” he said, “to reunite with my people in North Dakota. From there, I followed Aaron to the Allegheny Mountains.” The corner of his mouth crooked up. “He’d leave that bear in the damndest places for me to find.”
A burn shot from my chest and spread behind my nose.
He stroked my hair. “The night you chased Annie into our camp, I was there. I was chasing her too.” He stared at our laps. “I’ve grown attached to them over the past two years. Their lives were short, but very full. They’ve given me a reawakening. And more importantly”—he lifted his head, eyes raw—“they led me to you.”
A kind of isolation I didn’t realize I carried lifted away. I padded a fingertip over the blade-sharp angle of his jaw. “Why didn’t you tell me? All this time?”
His hand shackled my wrist, pulled it from his face. But he didn’t let go. “The veil between our realm and theirs shows me other things, darker things. Things I must keep from you.”
I laughed and it rang of hysterics. “Darker than this?” I tilted my head toward the nymph’s decayed body.
“Yes.”
“Remember the nightmares I had in the mountains? They featured the Drone. This was
before
I’d met the bastard. Imagine my surprise when he showed up at River Tweed. How do you explain that?”
“If he’s amidst transformation between human and other, maybe his spirit is caught between realms and your consciousness sensed him.”
“There is nothing scientific about that answer. In fact, it reeks of bullshit.”
“Spiritualism explains what science cannot.”
He looked away from my glare and laid a hand over my stomach. “Maybe he was closer than you thought and was able to project through your shared communication.”
“Maybe.” A stiff breeze stirred up the nymph’s decay. “Why would Aaron show himself in such a horrific way?”
“Sometimes it takes an extreme action to spur reaction. You’ll get better at interpreting the visions.” He studied me for a moment. “When you see them, can you leave them at will?”
“I don’t think so. I don’t want to.”
“Most spirit walkers require a partner to hold their hand in the spirit world. There’s danger of not returning. I’ll guard your mind, Evie. I’ll make sure you always find a way back.”
“There have been times I didn’t want to find my way back.” When I wanted join my A’s and Joel.
“It can be a trap in the mind.” His fingertips brushed my brow. “Trust me with yours?”
Trust mind, body and soul. Your guardians.
“Oh my God.
You’re
the guardians.” I relied on Michio to care for my physical health and Yang. “Of course, a doctor guards my body.”
Annie called Roark my heart fixer. He was my believer, my sense of direction and… “The guardian of my soul.”
“The priest,” Jesse said.
I met his eyes. Jesse saw my ghosts which meant I wasn’t crazy. He would protect me from madness. “A Lakota guards my mind.”
“Yes.”
“You knew this. What else are you not telling me?”
He stood and tugged me up by my arm. “We should go. I guarantee your body and soul are hunting my head as we speak.”
“What are you hiding?”
He righted my bike and seated me on it. His fingers slipped over the turquoise rock between my breasts. “Not even a close comparison to the stunning complexity of your eyes, but you give it depth. I knew you would.”
The stone dropped on my sternum. He straddled his bike, his lips in a pale line. When our enduros coughed to life, his shot forward and blazed a trail through the meadow. I snapped my molars together and sped to catch up.
A shadow blotched the trail and swept over us. The dark shape stretched and rippled. I whipped my head skyward. The sun blinded me and the enduro wobbled. I slowed and regained my balance.
Jesse swung his bike around. “A plane? We’re not far from the airport.”
Golden ribbons streaked the sky. “Maybe.”
“Let’s pick up our pace.”
We hit the high plateau and Jesse crawled to a stop. Michio stepped onto the path before us, knuckles jutting around his cane.
“Put your
shinobi-zue
away, Doc. We made a stop. She’s fine.”
Michio never took his eyes off me. “Evie?”
“I’m fine.” I scooted back and patted the seat.
He slipped the cane in a loop on his belt and cradled my face in his palms. “I’ll let you tell that to your priest. He’s scouring the mountain, convinced that you’ve hurled yourself into battle again.”
I touched my lips to the hard-edges of his mouth. The tension there said Roark had convinced him as well. He clutched my thigh and saddled in front of me. I slid my hands over his chiseled abs and buried my face in sandalwood. “What did Jesse call your stick? A shinobi what?”
A quiet chuckle danced over his shoulder and the bike plunged down the hill. Jesse didn’t follow.
“Evie?” A groggy shake. “Evie, wake up.”
I snapped to my feet, dagger out.
Roark fell back with a gasp in the dark. “Jaysus, love. One of these nights, you’re gonna flay me nose.”
I sheathed the knife and rubbed my eyes. “Shit, sorry. My turn, huh?” We’d agreed to split the night watch in pairs. Jesse and Roark. Tallis and me. Cliff and Michio.
“If you’re not up for it,” Michio said from the bed we shared, “I’ll take yours.”
“I’m good. Sorry I woke you.”
Roark handed me the carbine and thigh holster. His lips moved against my forehead. “Den’ forget to—”
“I know. Watch the sky.”
I stepped over Cliff’s blanket-wrapped body and trudged to the door. On the porch, I was greeted with a swipe of drool between my fingers.
“Hi boy.”
Darwin’s tail whipped back and forth, dragging his rear with it. Tallis leaned against the far-side of the house. When he saw me, he jogged over.
“Hey.” He puffed on a hand-rolled cigarette and held it out to me.
I inhaled, let it soak in my lungs, and handed it back.
“Keep it.” He lit another.
I finished the final drag. “Where’s Jesse?”
“Tree line. Twenty yards in. Two o’clock.”
The mountains shadowed the evergreens and reduced them to a prickly smudge against the gray sky. “I take it he’s not going to share the bed with Roark and Michio.”
Tallis dropped his head back, expelling smoke and laughter into the night sky.
“Shh.” I started toward the trees. “I’ll be right back.”
He grabbed my wrist. “You can’t.”
“I can.” I twisted my arm free.
“He’s the master at evading detection.”
“Well, shit. Bastard’s evaded me all night.”
“For what it’s worth, I think he’s trying.”
“Trying is a great way to describe him.”
He bowled another laugh, stopping abruptly when he caught my glare. “All right.” He flicked his squashed cig. “You want his attention, tell me to kiss you.”
“What?”
He cocked a lopsided grin. “You have to lure the beast out of hiding before you can tame him. Tell me to kiss you.”
“I’m sure you have balls, but I don’t want to see the evidence hanging in the Humvee.”
“As much as I love you thinking about my balls, let me worry about them.” The moon cast a spotlight on his blinking blue eyes.
“Oh, what the hell.” I angled the carbine to the side and raised my chin. A deep breath. “Kiss me.”
A smile spread over his face and his rifle creaked in his hands. He bent his head and his full lips swept over mine. His body moved closer and his mouth parted. Jesse had full lips. Would they feel like—
A fist shot out of the dark. Tallis’ head snapped to the side.
Dammit. “Jesse, stop.”
They rolled over the weeds in a whirlwind of flailing arms. I chased them, carbine banging against my back. Jesse landed atop, knuckles poised for a strike.
I trapped his forearm with mine, locked it between my thighs and brought his body to the ground. My other hand pressed his jugular. A little more pressure and—
His movements froze. “You’re a dead man, Reynolds.”
Nose to nose, I leveraged my weight and tacked on more discomfort to the arm bar. His jaw clenched.
“We talked about your threats. Besides, he had my consent. Acknowledge your mistake.”
Tallis squatted next to us sporting a bloody nose and a smug expression.
Jesse’s throat bobbed against my fingers as he looked daggers at the other man. “
Wanunhecun
, you dead fucking dickhead.”
I inhaled his breath. Under the hickory was all man. “Tallis, can you take the watch by yourself for a bit? Jesse and I have some things to discuss.”
“You bet.” He wiped his face on his sleeve and planted a kiss on my temple. A growl erupted under me.
“Okay, Jesse. I’m going to release you, but you’re going to promise two things. One, you won’t touch Tallis and two, you’ll talk.”
His glowing eyes bored into me and stoked the heat where my thighs locked his arm.
“I’m waiting.”
Emotions paraded across his face, none of them submissive. “You have my word on both things.”
The tension in my fingers loosened from his throat. His arm pulled free and his body twisted. In the next breath, I was flipped and straddled. The carbine clunked at my side.
Chest against mine, elbows other either side of my head, his breath smothered my face. “What do you want to talk about?”
I shut my eyes and girded myself for temptation. Then I engaged his gaze. “I want to get back to your motives. How do I sever the link between you and my ghosts?”
A storm raged in his eyes. “You think I’m here because of
them
?”
“It’s obvious.”
His expression thawed with his voice. “Obviously, it’s not.” The back of one finger traced my face from brow to chin. His lashes fanned down as he watched the slow caress. “What I feel for you has nothing to do with Annie and Aaron.”
The inches between us vanished. His lips touched mine. I had to strain to feel the contact, yet it caught my body on fire.
He trembled through jagged breaths and slipped his hand between our chests. “Everything I want is right here.” His fingers spread over my breastbone. Then he pushed up.
I yanked him back by his shirt. “Then why do you keep pulling away?”
Pain flashed through his eyes. “Dammit, Evie.” Steam huffed against my mouth. “I’m fucking drowning in my desire to be near you, to touch you”—he dropped his brow on mine and inhaled—“to be
inside
you.”
My own desire exploded in my womb and sizzled through my veins. We lay there in silence, his heart knocking against mine, his mouth, close enough to taste his breaths, but too far to savor his lips. I arched to reach him. The hand on my chest held me down.
Too soon, he raised his head, the resolution in his gaze diluted by mystery. “I’ve seen things. Things I can prevent if I keep distance between us.”
“Distance? What are you saying?”
His palm circled my left breast. “I’ll never be farther than a heartbeat.”
Emotional distance then. “This is about your visions. The dark ones.”
He shoved off me. “I can’t talk to you about that.” His eyes clouded over as if he’d traveled to another time, another place.
“Okay. I trust you. But you know that partnership you mentioned?”
His face slacked.
“It goes both ways, Jesse. I won’t let you get lost in their world.”
“I know.” He backed away, his muscular frame blending amongst the treed silhouettes.
When I turned toward the house, I wasn’t surprised to see the dark shadow blackening the porch. Even darker was the face attached to it.
“You okay?” Michio leaned against the doorjamb.
“Yeah.” My small smile agreed. “Thanks for not interfering.”
He crossed his arms. “I was two seconds away from losing your gratitude.”
Despite his schooled posture, I knew he was thrumming to run to me, sweep me back to bed. I blew him a kiss. “Go to sleep, gorgeous. I’ve got your back.”
As I paced to the perimeter, my steps lightened, knowing that even on my watch, Michio would always have my back.