“How you even know about this place? Is this where you take all the girls when you come to town?”
Rob shook his head and laughed.
“Are you back for good or what?” I asked. “You still play basketball for A&T?”
He shook his head. “Nah, I ended up transferring to Wake Forest.”
“You still play basketball, right?”
“Yeah,” he said, nodding. “After Chu died, I just stepped it up and started pushing myself. I cut back smoking and then I
was working out like crazy. Lifting weights, running ten miles every other day. I just started getting even better at ball,”
he said, animated. And then his mood changed. “Me and Chu, we was doing a lot of shit we wasn’t supposed to be doing. Shit
was starting to get hot down there. As soon as Wake came up A&T talking about recruiting me for the second team, I jumped
at it. Shit. I wanted to leave Greensboro and jive like start over anyway.”
“Hmmm…” I sighed.
“My bad, I ain’t call you back. I ain’t know what to say. I wasn’t ready. I’m just now starting to feel like I can handle
anything else,” he said, staring at the candlelight.
“Here’s your order,” the waitress said while placing a big dish in the center of the table. The spicy smell was so rich it
made my mouth start watering.
“It’s like a chicken stew,” Rob explained.
“Miss, we need some silverware,” I said, signaling the waitress, who had already walked away.
“No, she don’t,” Rob said over his shoulder. Then he leaned forward and said, “Ethiopians eat with their fingers. Here, let
me show you.”
I frowned, confused, and then I watched him pick up the thin flour wraps that looked like tortillas and break off pieces to
dip into the stew that was filled with different beans, herbs, spices, and bits of flavorful chicken.
“And we’re both supposed to eat out of the same bowl?” I asked, totally mixed up, cuz I ain’t never heard of no stuff like
this.
“Mm-hmm,” Rob said, smiling.
“You are getting too much of a kick out of this,” I said, copying what he did. I dipped a piece inside the bowl, careful not
to get any of the stew on my fingers, and then took a bite. “Mmmm…”
Rob winked at me from across the table. “Good, ain’t it?”
I was so surprised at how good it tasted. I could taste everything—the chickpeas, onions, and peppers. Different flavors exploded
inside my mouth. Before I knew it, I was scooping up some more and sucking it off my fingers. A couple of times Rob’s fingers
grazed mine when they was both in the bowl. I tried not to look at him whenever it happened.
“How you find out about this place?” I asked as I dipped the thing he called a fit-fit.
“Man, I’m not scared to try things. New, old. It builds character.”
“Is that what they teach you in college?” I asked sarcastically.
“Yup, and other stuff, too. You want the rest?” Rob asked, as the food had dwindled to the last drops.
“I don’t wanna look too greedy, but…”
He smiled, too, and scooped the last of the dora wot onto his last piece of bread. I couldn’t believe my body’s impulse to
lean forward and eat from out of his hand. I blushed and chewed at the same time before wiping my mouth with a napkin. I could
feel Rob’s eyes staring through me, so I cleared my throat and looked away.
“So tell me what you been up to,” he said as he dipped his fingers in the lemon water dish on the table.
Where was I supposed to start? “I just been out here trying to survive, that’s all.” I copied him, then wiped my fingers dry
with my napkin.
Rob ran his hand over his head and sighed deep. I knew he was uncomfortable, but what I was saying was true. I chose to leave
details out to make it easier.
“You want to go somewhere else to get dessert?” he asked.
I shrugged. “Okay.”
He left money on the table before the waitress had even come back.
In his truck, Rob was quiet and didn’t start up the engine right away. I turned toward him and said, “You know I don’t blame
you, Rob, if that’s what you thinking. But I do wanna know if you knew what Nut was into all this time?”
“What you mean? Him being burnt out off those dippers?” He smirked. “Yeah, I knew. That crazy muthafucka, my cousin.”
“Hmmm…” I groaned and looked out the window. If that’s all Rob was talking about, then I ain’t wanna bring up shit else. But
there was so many unanswered questions and things I wanted to know. “He told me about Mr. Brinkley.”
Rob gripped the steering wheel and bit down on his bottom lip. “To be honest, Camille, that nigga made Chu give him fifty
thousand dollars so he wouldn’t snitch to the cops about that shit.”
My eyes almost popped out of my head.
“If I knew Nut was gonna try some shit like that, he wouldn’t have rolled with us out there in the first place. Don’t get
me wrong, I ain’t even want the dude to get got, for real. I was like maybe we should just fuck with him, scare him and shit…
but Chu was fuckin’ heated for what that man had did to you. Chu just let off.
Bap! bap! bap!
” Rob said, imitating the gunshots. “He shot that nigga cold in his chest, his neck, and his head. And then Nut took a piss
on him, just because he could. But that’s Nut for you.”
I stared out the window as Rob took a deep breath. That nigga lied to me about killing Mr. Big. It was Chu all along. I was
itching for a cigarette, but I ain’t have a single one on me.
“The next day, man, Nut was talking all kind of shit about how he was gonna snitch and shit, unless we came up off some of
that work for Smurf,” Rob said, shaking his head. “It was crazy. I ain’t know my cousin was foul like that.”
“You have no idea.” I smirked.
“I had to talk Chu into doing it, too. He ain’t wanna give Nut shit. I couldn’t blame him, but I knew Nut was just greedy
and wanted to get put on. So Chu gave him some,” Rob said and then sighed. “But then the very next day, he said he ain’t want
the coke. He said he wanted the money instead. Chu was pissed, but he gave it to him and Nut gave the coke back.”
“Was y’all sure it was the same package you got back?” I asked, frowning.
“Yeah, why?” Rob asked, like a light had just come on.
“What y’all do with it after that?”
“Ummm…,” Rob said, and then started thinking on it. “That dirty muthafucka!”
“What?”
“That muthafucka gave us back some bullshit!” Rob yelled.
“Huh?” I asked, confused. “What you mean?”
“Man, we took that shit to Greensboro and sold it to one of our regular connects down there. We was just starting to build
a little something, you know?”
I shook my head as all the pieces came together. Nut was one dirty dude.
“Them North Carolina niggas thought we sold them some garbage on purpose!” Rob said angrily. “Them niggas must’ve followed
Chu back up here and shit. They just waited for his ass.”
He pounded his dashboard and stared out the window in front of him. I shook my head, cuz it was all Nut’s fault that my man
had walked straight into a trap.
“That dirty muthafucka. And this nigga fuckin’ flipping money, buying and selling houses and shit. He played us like some
muthafuckin’ bamas, young.”
And not to mention what the fuck else he was doing. But I decided not to add fuel to Rob’s already burning fire.
THE NEXT DAY
R
ob fell asleep on my old love seat, which was entirely too short for his long legs, but he did his best to get comfortable.
He was so angry about everything he had found out that I had to calm him down with a little bit of herb when we first got
home. Rob was only in town for just a few weeks in between the end of spring semester and the start of summer school and training
camp. He even calculated how much weed he could smoke between now and the time his system had to be clean for when he went
back to school.
I went to the kitchen to make breakfast—spinach and cheese omelets and turkey sausages. He woke up as soon as the sausages
started sizzling in the pan.
“Mmm, hell yeah,” he said, smiling and stretching at the same time. He stood up and stretched even more.
“Your body fucked up right now, ain’t it?” I said, giggling.
He laughed. “It’s all good. I just want whatever the hell it is you cooking. That shit smells good as a mug.”
I smiled and made our plates, while he went to the bathroom.
“You don’t mind if I grab one of these washcloths, do you?” he yelled.
“Nope.” And then there was a knock at the door.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
That chick was right on time. I knew she was gonna be sniffing over here. She knocked some more.
Knock! Knock! Knock!
“Now, a bitch ain’t come over here when she smelled the weed last night, but this, yeah, this I have to come over for,” Shakira
shouted as soon as I opened the door.
“Hey.” I stepped aside and rolled my eyes.
“Oh? You got company,” she said, looking Rob over. “What’s up, negro? You can’t speak.”
“Hey, KiKi, what’s up?” he said, before going back in the bathroom.
“Bitch, what the hell he doing over here?” Shakira whispered.
I shrugged and tried to play innocent.
“No, you better start talking, heifer. Don’t give me that shit.”
“It’s a long story. Can I tell you later?” I asked, smirking.
“Mm-hmm,” she said, rolling her eyes. “If you make me a plate.”
“I only made two omelets. Here, take some sausage, and here,” I said handing her two eggs from the carton. “Help yourself
and go.”
“Uh, no, you didn’t,” she said with her mouth wide open. She took the food, though, and headed to the door. “See how bitches
do you when sexy men in the house.”
“You know I love you, girl,” I said, smiling and closing the door behind her.
Rob came out the bathroom a few minutes later. “So, I ain’t know you and her was still tight like that. How that happen?”
he said, sitting down at the table.
“That’s a long story.” I went to the fridge and poured both of us some orange juice.
“I got time,” he said and bit into the food.
I sat down and started telling him what life was like for me since Chu’s murder. I felt like I was confessing to a priest
or something. My heart poured out. He reminded me of Chu, when he used to listen to me. The words and the stories flowed out
like a river. By the time I finished telling him everything, I had cried, he had wrapped his arms around me, and I had kissed
him on his lips.
Even though telling Rob about everything made me feel better, I could tell that he was way more pissed off now than when he
came over the night before. He sat on the couch rubbing my back in the quiet room. We listened to Shakira shuffling around
across the hall and the noise from the other tenants who lived downstairs. Marcha had been moved out, and Nut had two young
couples renting now.
“That nigga goin’ get what’s coming to his bitch-ass,” Rob said. “Believe it.”
I took a deep, painful breath and thought about what he said.
“You not going back out there, you hear me?” Rob said, looking down at me. “Not while I’m here. I don’t care what I gotta
do. You not doing that shit any fuckin’ more!”
More tears slid down my face. That’s all I wanted to hear since the day I started.
“You don’t have to. You know why?”
“Why?” I whispered, with my hoarse voice.
“Chu left something for you with Tep.”
I sat up and wiped my face. “What’s that?”
Rob pulled out his phone and started dialing. “I got in touch with his mother when I first came home, and she gave me his
number.”
I watched Rob waiting for Tep to answer the phone.
“Guess who I finally caught up with?” Rob said into the phone. “Yes, sir. She right here.”
“Hello?” I said and then cleared my throat. “Tep?”
“Hey, baby girl, how you doing?”
“I’m all right.”
“Man, I’ve been trying to get up with you for a minute.”
“How long you been out?”
“It’s been like thirteen months. I didn’t get released right when I was supposed to, though. Shit, after Chu died, man, I
kirked out a little bit, and they added some time for some trouble I got into.”
“Oh?”
“But what about you? You been taking care of yourself?”
I smiled and wiped away more tears that fell. “Yeah, I’ve been trying.”
“Well, listen, I moved to Miami after I got out. Shit, D.C. still got too many memories for me, Joe.”
“Un-huh.”
“But hey, I got something Chu wanted me to make sure you had if anything ever happened to him. He kept it in a safe place
over my mother’s and I made sure I got it as soon as I got out. But anyway, I wanna make sure I get you some ends first. Then
maybe you and Rob can make a trip down here.”
I smiled. “For real? That sounds good.”
“Yeah, beaches for days down this bitch. So y’all make sure you bring your swimsuits.”
“Okay,” I said, laughing and looking at Rob, who was confused.
“All right, let me speak back to my man.”
I passed the phone back to Rob and then listened as he rushed to tell Tep what he had suspected happened between Rob’s cousin
and Tep’s brother. I went to the kitchen to clean up, cuz I ain’t wanna hear nothing they planned to do about Nut. But I did
hear Smurf’s name mentioned a couple times.
After a while Rob hung up. He walked up behind me while I washed the dishes. “Tep is gonna wire you some money today. He said
he was gonna call me later to let us know everything. How you feel?”
I shook my head. “It’s all so overwhelming. I don’t know.”
He squeezed my shoulders and said, “Camille, everything is going to be okay. Believe me.”
I looked up at him and smiled.
He bent down and gave me a kiss on my forehead. “I got you, you hear me?”
For once, I felt optimistic. Like real change was just around the corner. There was no looking back to the past, only looking
forward.
A COUPLE DAYS LATER…
W
e drove from D.C. to Miami just so we could spend more time talking and catching up about the two years since Chu died. It
was a long, humid ride that was taking us forever. Rob took 95 South, cutting through Virginia, fighting traffic with all
the tourists on their family vacations just so we could visit his college in North Carolina. We was in Emporia, Virginia,
when the air conditioner had the nerve to conk out. But we got it fixed the same day with some of the money Tep sent me. We
was just outside of Durham when we got a flat tire. It was way too hot for all that sitting on the side of the highway waiting
for him to change it, but I managed.