Authors: Devon Hartford
“Sounds like it. I thought you hated him. Wasn’t he the boy who always made fun of you and called you names? I thought he made you miserable?”
“He still does.”
She laughs a friendly laugh. “Then why on earth did you sleep with him, Elle?”
“I’ve been asking myself that same question all day.”
Sex has always been an open topic with my parents. Not that there has been much to talk about on my end. But they wanted me to feel comfortable bringing it up if I needed to. They were always saying things like,
“Do you have any boyfriends? Are you sleeping with anybody? Don’t forget protection. If you get pregnant, come to us. We want you to make your own choices for yourself, but we want you to be informed. We will love you no matter what you do. You’re our sunshine, Elle. The light of our life.”
I nearly get Adult Onset Diabetes thinking about how sweet they’ve always been. Sometimes, it was just too much. Too good to be true. I’m a born pessimist. Like I said. The stork dropped me at the wrong house.
“I thought you hadn’t seen Connor since…” Mom trails off. “Since grad night, wasn’t it? Wasn’t that the last time you saw him?”
“Don’t remind me.”
“Oh, that’s right. I remember you came home—”
“Please, Mom.”
“I’m sorry, honey. I know how much he hurt you.”
“He didn’t hurt me, Mom!”
“Denial doesn’t change what happened. You have to face it some day.”
“Mom!”
She sighs. “I know it’s hard, honey. Maybe you should come home for a few days. Spend some time with Gerry and I here on the farm.”
“No, Mom. That’s not gonna help.”
“Then what do you need, Elle? Tell me. I will do anything I can to help.”
Unconsciously, I start reading the ingredients label on my iced coffee, which I’ve nearly finished drinking. SHAKE WELL. BEST SERVED COLD. REFRIGERATE AFTER OPENING. FOR MORE INFORMATION, CALL 1-800…
“Elle? Are you all right?”
“I’m fine, Mom. It’s just that… It’s just that—” I’m not gonna say it. I nearly throw my empty bottle against the cement pathway, but stop myself. My neighbors walk here.
“What, Elle?”
“It’s just that…” I switch directions with a huffy sigh. “He’s been texting me all day, Mom. He wants to see me.”
“I’m confused. Do you
not
want to talk to him?”
“I don’t have any choice.”
“You
always
have a choice, honey.”
“No. I have to finish his stupid interview.”
“So talk to him,” she says calmly.
“You don’t get it!”
“I think I do, Elle.” That stupid sunflower smile of hers shines through the phone.
I don’t register her words. I just barrel forward. “I think maybe I like him, Mom!”
“That’s great, Elle.”
“But he’s an arrogant asshole! An annoying jerk! An inconsiderate womanizer! I
can’t
like him. It would be the height of stupidity to like him. I’d be better off liking a tornado or an earthquake!”
“Oh, honey. These things don’t always make sense.”
“What’s wrong with me, Mom?”
“Nothing is wrong with you, Elle. But I think you need to talk to him.”
How did I
know
she was going to say that?
I didn’t even need to call her.
Damn her.
<<<<<<<>>>>>>>
CONNOR
During my afternoon break, I sneak behind the wall at the back of the booth and chug a bottle of water. I also check my new phone to see if Lex has texted me back yet. She hasn’t.
After I got my shit together this morning, I hopped on my bike and headed to the nearest phone store to get a new one before the show started. Fuckin Gloria. If it wasn’t for her, I wouldn’t have dropped mine in the toilet last night. Good thing I memorized Lex’s digits so I could text her the second I got the new one.
The area behind the booth is the closest thing to privacy I’m gonna get. The only thing between me and all the fans on the show floor is a bunch of curtains. There isn’t even a roof to keep the noise out. Listening to 45,000 jabbering people all damn day gets pretty damn loud.
I kept hoping I’d hear Electra’s voice. I never did. I also kept hoping she’d poke her head in the booth and surprise me. Didn’t happen. At this point, I’m losing hope. She’s giving me the brush off. I knew she would. I saw it in her eyes last night.
The curtain suddenly ruffles and I nearly shit myself with excitement.
Electra.
Romeo leans his head in. “There he is! The star of the show!”
Fuck. Wrong head. I smirk at him. “Something like that.”
Romeo pulls the curtain closed behind him. “Where’s your co-star?”
“Who? Electra?”
“Yes!”
“Shit, man. I was hopin you’d seen her.”
He shakes his head. “Not today.”
“Fuck.”
He gives me a look. “Are you pining for her?”
“What?”
“Pining? Yearning? Longing?”
I laugh. “Dude, speak fuckin English.”
“If you weren’t so dashing, that would be rude. I simply meant, do you miss her so much it hurts?”
“No,” I scoff.
“Liar! I see it in your eyes.”
Something about this Romeo guy makes me feel like he won’t judge me. Everything comes pouring out. “I texted her a hundred times today. She never responded. We’re supposed to finish our interview today. I don’t know what the fuck happened. First I was like, fuck that bitch—” Romeo smiles. “—then I was like, I wish she’d fuckin text me back. Like, if she doesn’t, I’m gonna lose my shit and run out of the convention hall and search all of L.A. until I find her.”
Romeo gives me a weird look, “Just so you could finish your interview? Yesterday you didn’t seem all that interested in answering questions.”
“Fuck, I don’t know.”
Romeo nods like he knows shit. “Let me guess. Did you two…
seal
the
deal
last night?”
“What, like fuck her?”
“What other deal is there to seal?”
I grin. “Yeah. I fucked her. Best sex I’ve ever had.”
Romeo nods again. “I imagine she felt the same way.”
“That’s not your asshole talkin, is it?”
“Elle Oh Elle, Connor Hughes.”
“Well, is it?
“If you’re suggesting that I imagine sex with you would be incredible, you are correct, sir.” He winks at me and puts his monocle in his eye. “But no, I believe Ms. Warmoth has had a thing for you since… well, since long before I watched you two interact yesterday morn. Venom like that doesn’t come from lack of passion.”
“Huh?”
“She likes you. I daresay she feels even more strongly than that.”
“I don’t know about that, man. Haven’t you had a hate fuck?”
He smiles like a girl. “I don’t kiss and tell. But let me ask you this. How many women whom you’ve hate fucked do you text the next day?”
“Shit, bro. I don’t text
any
women I fuck the next day.”
“As I suspected. You don’t hate her, my friend. You are feeling what is commonly called love.”
I burst into laughter. “Bull fuckin shit.”
“Methinks the gentleman doth protest too much.”
I snort. “The what?”
<<<<<<<>>>>>>>
CONNOR
What a fuckin day.
I must’ve signed ten thousand headshots. My hand started to cramp at the end. But that Sharpie ink on my palm never gave out. It’s still there since yesterday.
It takes me an hour to leave the convention hall because more fans want selfies and shit. I say yes to everybody because I hate being a dick. These women are so damn nice, I wouldn’t think of it. They’re total strangers and they’re all treating me like a fuckin saint.
What they don’t know won’t hurt them.
I finally get to the parking garage and hop on my bike. Before I put my helmet on, I text Lex.
Do you want to finish the interview tonight? I’ll buy you dinner.
Her boss is expecting it.
I’m sure she’ll say yes.
It’s already five o’clock.
I wait a few minutes for her to reply, but she doesn’t so I cruise home through traffic. At my place, I sit on the edge of my couch staring at my phone on the coffee table for over an hour.
Nothing.
At quarter to seven, the phone rings and I can’t breathe. I jump off the couch and grab the phone.
Fuckin Gloria.
I sigh hard.
Do I answer?
Shit.
I grunt, “What?”
“I thought you’d be busy with your girlfriend.”
“She’s not my girlfriend.” It hurts to say it.
“So you just fucked her for a night?”
“Yeah. So what.”
“Are you going to see her again?”
“I doubt it.” It
kills
me to say it.
The smile in her voice is loud and clear. “Come over, Connor. It’s the weekend and I’m horny.”
I don’t fuckin care.
“Come over, Connor,” she purrs. “You know you want to. I know how you like to come on my tits.” Her voice is sultry. My dick should be hard as a rock. It’s soft as a sock. “Come on over and you can come on Mama’s tits.”
Mama?
I look around for the nearest toilet to drop my phone in. But I’m in my living room and the phone store is gonna close soon. “Not tonight, Gloria. I’ve got a fuckin headache.” I almost laugh at myself.
“Don’t be a bitch, Connor. Who do you know who will suck your dick for a solid hour? Do you think I do all that yoga and Pilates just to stay healthy? No way, mister. I do it for you.”
“I’m serious, G. The convention was exhausting. I need to chill tonight.”
“Unacceptable. I’ll buy take out and be right over.”
“I might not be here.”
“I thought you said you wanted to chill?”
“Chill, as in, do fuckin nothing.”
“Do me, Connor. I’ll make it worth your while.”
“I gotta go, G.” I hang up on her.
An hour later, she’s standing on my doorstep looking extremely fuckin hot for however old she is. She holds a bottle of wine and takeout something. “I brought Thai. I like to eat light before a marathon fuck session. And wine. Here.” She jams the bottle in my hand and barges inside.
She’s lucky Lex didn’t text me back otherwise I’d throw her out.
She sets the dinner bag on my dinner table and gets plates and forks from the kitchen like she owns the place. She’s been here so many times she knows where everything is. “Don’t you think the dining room set I picked out for you is
so
much nicer than that ratty old thrift store table and chairs
you
had? It gives this place that modern touch.”
It also gives it
her
touch. I don’t know why I let her redecorate. She doesn’t live here.
She opens one cupboard after the other. “Are you out of napkins?”
Fuck if I know.
I stare at her.
“Fine. We’ll use paper towels.” She smiles at me as she unpacks the food. She looks pretty damn good in her skin tight yoga outfit that looks like she bought it this morning before her workout. She probably did. “Well? Are you going to pull out my chair for me?”
I roll my eyes and walk over to the table so she can sit down like a fuckin lady.
“Sit down.” She points at the chair next to her.
“Jesus Christ, Mom. Do you take away my allowance if I don’t do what you say?”
She grins. She has nice fuckin lips. Probably gets injections, but she spends so much you can’t tell for sure. “Oh, you want to roleplay tonight? I can be your momma, Connor. Now sit down and eat your dinner like a good little boy or I’ll send you to your room.”
—You’re in trouble now, Connor Hughes. I have to spank you. Bend over my desk—
I almost puke in Gloria’s face thinking about that nightmare from this morning.
“What’s wrong, Connor?” Gloria is smiling like a true friend. “Are you okay?” She stands up and rubs my elbow. “What’s wrong? Tell me.”
If she didn’t sound like she actually cared, I’d shout at her to get her fuckin hands off me. But she’s being nice. I sit down so she’ll let go of my arm. “It’s nothin. Gimme some of those noodles.”
We eat while she talks on and on about the latest insider Hollywood gossip. She throws A-list names around like she’s talking about her personal friends. She almost is. She’s been in business in this town a long time.
I try to tune her out.
I eat.
My phone is one of those new Samsung Edge ones where your messages only light up the strip on the side. It’s hanging half out my pocket so I can see it but Gloria can’t. It’s been sitting that way all through dinner.
The message strip lights up.
Lex.
Let’s meet later this week. I got an extension on your interview.
I hide my smile the rest of the night until Gloria leaves.
Chapter 12
CONNOR
Morning sun warms my face as I peel my helmet off. Still straddling my parked motorcycle, I listen to the voicemail from my parents on my phone before I buzz inside the building to finish my interview with Electra.
“Mount Rushmore was incredible, son. You need to go whenever you have the chance.”
“It was
so
small!” Mom laughs.
“It just seems that way, Kell. If we had been closer, it would’ve been gigantic. The sign said the heads are sixty feet high! That’s six stories! Who do you know who has a head that big?”
“You do!” she laughs. “We could put your head up there next to Washington or Lincoln and it would be the
same
size.”
Dad chuckles. “I walked into that one. Anyway, son, just wanted to give you an update. We’re on the road headed for the Great Lakes. We should hit Chicago by nightfall. I hear they have the best summer weather anywhere in the country.”
“It’s the windy city, Connor!” Mom hollers. “Everyone there is a blowhard like your Dad!”
“Enough of that, woman!”
They both laugh and cheer, “Bye, Connor!”
I climb off my bike and trot up the stairs to the building. The guy behind the desk inside tells me to take the elevator to the fourteenth floor.
Just as the doors are closing, some blonde haired hottie with icy eyes comes running up, her heels clicking on the marble. “Wait!”
I jam my arm in the doors and she steps inside. “Where you going?”
She looks at the panel. “Oh. Same as you.”