Authors: John Spikenard
It was Tuesday evening, and after dropping Buffalo off at his house, George proceeded home and quickly changed into civilian slacks and a nice dress shirt. He got back into his car and headed out of town. He drove for about a half an hour along a nearly deserted country road to a quiet little town with a small restaurant. George preferred dinners on Tuesday night because it was the least crowded night of the week. In busy restaurants, it resulted in a shorter wait for a table. At the Crossroads Bar and Grill, it practically assured total privacy.
Entering the dimly lit restaurant, George scanned the room. The night’s menu was scrawled on a chalkboard near the door. In the main and only dining room, there were twenty or so tables, each covered with a plastic, red and white checkered tablecloth.
Nothing but the best when I go out!
George thought sarcastically. Two couples were eating in the dining room, and the rest of the tables were vacant. Looking into the darkly paneled waiting area, a blond lady in a black dress sat with her back to him at a large wraparound bar. She was talking animatedly with the bartender as if they were lifelong friends. Seeing that she was empty-handed, George approached her and in his best movie-star voice said, “Hi there, Sparkle Eyes. What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?”
Swinging around, Leona Harris recognized him, slid off the bar stool, threw her arms around his neck, and kissed him! “George, where have you been? And what’s this Sparkle Eyes stuff?”
George kissed her back. “Sorry, I heard someone call you that once and thought it kind of fit. Anyway, I got stuck at the office. Got here as fast as I could.” Nodding to the bartender, he said, “Sorry for interrupting, Joe.”
“That’s all right, George. Can I get you guys a drink?”
“No thanks. We’re going to go ahead and get a table before they’re all gone!”
“Fat chance on a Tuesday night!”
Overhearing the conversation, a waitress standing nearby grabbed a couple of menus and with put-on pomp asked, “Your usual table, sir?”
“Absolutely, Alice. We’re creatures of habit!”
Alice, fortyish, her hair in a ponytail and dressed in tootight black jeans and a long-sleeved white blouse, led them to a table in a secluded corner of the dining room. The other two couples in the dining room glanced up briefly, but continued their meals as George and Leona took their seats out of earshot on the other side of the room.
“Do you have any questions about the specials?” asked Alice.
They both shook their heads no.
“Okay. Here are your menus, let me know if you have any questions. I’ll be right back with your waters.”
As the waitress walked away, Leona turned to George. “George, do you think we’ll ever be able to go to a really nice restaurant?”
“Yeah, but not in the Norfolk area. You know it’s against regs for us to fraternize. Someone would be bound to see us.”
“Well, I wish we could…. It would be so nice and so much more convenient.”
“I know. I wish we could, too, but right now it’s a dream, Leona.”
Leona sat silently for a few moments as if sulking. Then, changing the subject, she asked, “Speaking of dreams, have you had any more of those nightmares? You know, those disaster dreams you mentioned?”
“My Daily Double? Oh, just one or two a week, whether I need them or not!”
“Wow, that’s pretty often. Are they always the same?”
“No, sometimes they’re set on a submarine, but not always. I guess if I really analyze them, they do have a common thread.”
“What’s that?”
“Well, I’m always in a situation that’s hopeless, like we’re all going to die for one reason or another, and there is nothing I can do. It’s totally beyond my control, or anyone else’s in the dream.”
“So you’re all doomed?”
“Yeah, that pretty well sums it up.”
“Oh George, I’m worried about you. Maybe you should see a doctor.”
“A doctor? I’m not having any medical problems. I’m just having a couple of bad dreams every week.”
“Well yeah, but sometimes that’s a sign that subconsciously something is bothering you. Maybe a counselor could help.”
“A
counselor
? Is
that
what you meant by
doctor
?”
“Yes.”
“Jeez, Leona, I haven’t gone batty! I don’t need a shrink to tell me the source of the dreams or what’s bothering me. It’s perfectly clear.”
“Washington DC?”
“Yeah. It’s remembering the horror of those scenes after the blast and being powerless to do anything to avenge the murders. I lost good friends in that attack, but there was no way to strike back. No way to demonstrate to those who perpetrated the attack that the costs are too high for them to ever do it again.”
“That’s why everything in your dreams is beyond your control?”
“That’s part of it. I spent my entire career becoming as good as I could possibly be at defending the nation against nuclear attack, and it wasn’t good enough. Thanks to me, we probably let the submarine slip past that delivered the warhead.”
“George, you don’t know that! It’s just speculation. You shouldn’t feel
guilty
about Washington DC—it wasn’t your fault. The system wasn’t designed to protect against that kind of attack.” Leona reached out and put her hand on George’s. “You could be the greatest submariner of all time, and you probably
are
, and it wouldn’t make any difference.”
“Thanks, you’re making my next point for me,” George responded. “It’s not so much
guilt
about DC as it is the realization
nothing has changed
. It’s the hopelessness and helplessness of continuing to be held hostage by Islamic terrorists. It’s the knowledge it could happen again, any day, because our national policies have not addressed the core issues. Submariners continue to study and learn and make personal sacrifices to go on patrol, when the patrols are just as futile today as they were five years ago.”
“Can I get you something from the bar?” The waitress interrupted their conversation as she placed two glasses of water on the table.
“Yeah, Alice,” answered George. “Could you bring us a couple of glasses of white wine?”
“You got it. Are you ready to order?”
“Not just yet,” answered George. “Could you give us a few minutes?”
“Sure,” Alice sighed, looking around the nearly empty dining room. “I’ve got all night.”
“Thanks,” said George as she turned to leave.
George reached out and held Leona’s hand. He looked her in the eye and in a deadly serious tone said, “I asked you to meet me here tonight because I have something important to talk to you about.” He paused, looking down as if searching for the right words.
Leona picked up her napkin as if wiping her mouth, but it was really to hide her nervousness and confusion.
What is George doing now? Oh my gosh, don’t tell me he’s going to propose to me in the Crossroads Bar and Grill! He better not—I’ll kill him!
George continued, leaning on the table with both elbows so that he could get closer to her and speak softly. “How do you like your life?” he asked.
Leona laughed a nervous laugh. “What kind of question is that?”
“An important one.”
“Well, I don’t know how to answer it. How about giving me a little hint as to where this is going?” Leona didn’t like the sounds of this. Was George asking her to marry him or breaking up with her?
George looked at her intensely, leaned back in his chair, took a deep breath, and let out a long sigh. “I’m thinking about doing something that would completely change my life, and if you’re willing, it would completely change yours, too.”
Leona raised the napkin to her mouth again.
Oh my gosh, he
is
asking me to marry him. Not here—not in the Crossroads Bar and Grill…
“Well,” she answered, “I can’t tell you whether I’m willing to do something unless you tell me what it is.”
As Leona waited, George fidgeted nervously with his fork for what seemed like a couple of minutes. Finally, he leaned forward again and in a soft voice said, “I have a plan I have been working on for a number of years. It involves a solution to the political problems we just discussed.”
Now this was really getting confusing. This didn’t sound like a marriage proposal. “What kind of plan?”
“A plan to solve the problem of terrorists and nuclear weapons.”
“That would be great, George, but what does it have to do with you and me? And what do I have to be willing to do?” She asked, totally bewildered.
“Well, tell me, if we could do that—if we could solve the problem of terrorists and nuclear weapons—would you be willing to give up everything you now have and start over with a new life in a new land?”
Leona let out an exasperated sigh. “George, you’re being really
weird
. What are you talking about?”
“Okay, okay. I’ll come right out and say it. I have a plan that will be similar to the doctrine of Mutually Assured Destruction. It’s our best hope of deterring the radical Islamists and stopping nuclear terrorism in its tracks, but it’s too politically difficult for any
country
to undertake. For those of us involved, it will mean going into hiding and living our lives with new identities. We will be hunted by those who want to stop us, so we will have to be constantly vigilant for signs we have been discovered.”
“Are you serious? I thought all of your political discussions were just talk. Just complaining about the establishment.”
“I’m totally serious. And I have a team ready to join me. What I want to know is whether you will join me, too. If we do this, we will have to leave everything and everyone we know behind. And I don’t want to leave you. If I start a new life, I want you to be part of it.”
Leona’s heart was in her throat. It wasn’t really a marriage proposal, but then again it was. Tears welled in her eyes as she thought about the proper way to answer this question. She had no close family ties. She was an only child, and her parents had divorced when she was twelve. She hadn’t seen her father since she graduated from high school, and her mother had passed away just last year. She loved George, but never thought she would be interesting enough to satisfy a man like George. Here was a man ready to shake the world. A man ready, willing, and able to take matters into this own hands to solve one of the world’s most complex problems. And he wanted her by his side. He wanted to live the rest of his life with
her
.
As she sat in disbelief, Leona remembered a conversation she had with her friend, Brenda, a couple of years earlier. Sitting in Leona’s cluttered little kitchen and sipping white wine, Brenda had asked, “So, how’s George?”
“Well, I probably ought to have my head examined,” Leona answered. “If my mom knew I was romantically involved with an officer, she’d be ecstatic. But she’d be terrified, if she really knew George!”
“What do you mean? True, he’s divorced—but that just tips the odds in your favor; divorced men are much more likely to remarry than never-married men over thirty-five are to marry at all.”
“Whoa! Let’s leave the M word out of this! That isn’t what I meant anyway. He’s so…I don’t know…
intense
. Hey, we’re both patriotic; we volunteered to join the navy, and these are rallying times. But he seems to feel this urgency, this personal responsibility, to fix things. He’s unwilling to let the system work as it was designed. I feel like I’ll always be sort of second in his passions…it’s hard to explain.”
Leona and Brenda had become almost instant friends from the day they met. Each was new to the Norfolk area, and each was glad to find a new friend. Brenda had never been in the navy and had never even known anyone in the military, so she was fascinated by Leona’s stories of navy life. Leona had transferred from a stint in the Naval Training Command in Corpus Christi, Texas, but had never been in a submarine command before. So a lot of things in Norfolk were new to her, too.
“Everything is such a big deal to you, Leona. You really need to chill! How can you stand being in the navy? From what you’ve told me, your life is constant turmoil!”
“Oh, I know. It’s just that before I joined the navy, I hardly ever left Wichita. Everything was settled then—never any surprises. I guess I got used to the stable life.”
“Well as they say, ‘You’re not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy!’”
Leona laughed. “Yeah, sometimes I feel like I need the Wizard—I’d ask for courage, heart,
and
brains!”
“But not to go home?”
“No, I kind of like moving around. The navy’s perfect for that!”
“So how did you and George get started?” Brenda asked curiously.
“I don’t know. It just sort of happened. I met him my first day at work at SUBLANT headquarters.. I thought he was pleasant and businesslike, but I didn’t find anything particularly interesting about him, and certainly nothing
romantic
, at first.
“At
first
…”
“Yeah, but the more we worked together, the more intriguing he became. He’s keenly intelligent and has a wonderful sense of humor. And as time went on, I found myself looking forward to our interactions more and more. Soon, even though he was several years older than I was, and an
officer
to boot, I was really taken by him. I mean, I could feel my stomach clench whenever he fixed those deep blue eyes on me.”