Authors: Aliyah Burke
“Did you ever want to do something regardless of what the ramifications would be?”
“Are you saying you married him?” The tone grew guarded.
Dezarae continued as if he hadn’t spoken at all. “Because the way I feel when you touch me or just
look at me makes me want to forget the world outside even exists.” Her head fell back to rest against the hard
planes of his chest.
“I feel it, too, Firebird. I feel it too.” He pulled her so she totally rested against him. “What are we
going to do about it?”
Smiling sadly, she looked out the kitchen window and saw the stars in the night sky. “Nothing. We
are going to do nothing.”
The storm was over. Tomorrow the roads will be cleared and you will be one step
closer to going home to wherever you belong. To whomever you belong to.
“Why? Why deny what we both want? What we both crave?” Jeb could hear the disappointment in
her voice.
Why deny yourself, Firebird?
Yeah, why not?
“Because you don’t know who you are,” Dezarae said, pulling away and carrying the
dinner to the table.
Gray eyes narrowed to slits. “Jesus! What, you think I’m with the goddamn Klan because of my
tattoo?” he thundered, spinning to face her.
“Don’t raise your voice to me,” she warned. Eyes that normally invited you in to swim in their
chocolaty depths grew unyielding.
“So what if I was with the Klan! I don’t remember who I was,” he kept right on yelling.
“First, you
need
to not yell at me. Second, that wasn’t my reason at all.” Her movements were jerky
as she took a chair and dished herself up some dinner. Dezarae totally ignored the man in her dining area.
Jeb groaned in frustration as he rubbed his temples. Silently, he sat across from her and prepared a
plate for himself. He wanted her to talk to him. But he knew he owed her an apology.
“I’m sorry I yelled and I’m sorry I jumped to the wrong conclusion. Will you tell me why we are
going to do nothing about our feelings?”
Why “we” are going to do nothing.
Dezarae knew he wouldn’t force anything on her, a realization
that endeared him to her even more.
“Because you may have a wife, fiancée, or girlfriend,” she answered as she took a bite of food.
“But—”
“I know,” she interrupted. “You don’t remember. But they would and are probably worried sick
about you. I know I would be.”
He ate in silence for a while. “And if I wasn’t married?”
Brown eyes swirled with heat. “Don’t make this any harder.”
Oh, it’s hard all right.
“I don’t feel married.”
The hand that held the fork trembled as she set it carefully beside her plate. Dezarae met his gaze.
“They will have the roads cleared tomorrow and I can get you to Shadyville. We will find out who you are
and where you are supposed to be. So don’t begin something that has no future and would just wither and
die.”
He put his fork down as well. Jeb slid his chair back to rise and walk around the table. At her side, he
reached for her and drew her out of the chair and led her to the couch.
Settling his lean body on the couch he tugged her down onto his lap, using one strong arm to anchor
her there he cupped her face with the other one. “Didn’t you ever think that this was where I was supposed to
end up? Here with you?” His hand was gentle as it stroked her cheek.
“How do you know this wouldn’t have a future, Dez? You are the one who has Phoenix in her name.
You must believe that if it was meant to be, dying wouldn’t be a concern.” His hand drew her face closer to
his until their lips almost touched. “For it would be reborn.”
Insides trembling at his words and his contact, Dezarae could only blink. “I can’t go through that
kind of pain,” she whispered.
22
CONNELLY’S FLAME
Aliyah Burke
“I don’t understand.” His voice, too, was hushed.
“I can’t allow myself to feel anything for you. I don’t know you and it will be easier when you leave
if I don’t let myself.” Her eyes welled up with tears.
“Don’t cry, Firebird. Please don’t cry.” His fingertips immediately wiped away the first few tears
that escaped. “Don’t cry. It breaks my heart.”
And you could break mine.
“I’m sorry,” she sputtered before the floodgates opened and the tears just
poured from her dark eyes.
With a tender smile, Jeb tucked her close to his chest and held her as she cried herself out. One hand
pressed her head against his chest as the other one caressed her arm.
Dezarae cried it all out. The loss of her father, not knowing her mother. Everything. It had been so
long since she had accepted comfort from another person. When her father died she had Dale, but he had also
been consumed by his grief and it seemed she had done most of the comforting.
He remembered comforting someone before. A woman with big doe-like eyes. She had sat in his lap
and he had held her like this. But who? Who was she? Why couldn’t he remember her name?
Jeb wanted to know who he was so he could prove to the woman in his arms that they were meant to
be. Things happened for a reason; he had been told that by someone before. Pushing the fact that he couldn’t
remember aside, he focused on offering silent support to the woman he knew. The one who was real and in
his arms right now.
The cotton of his shirt was soaked with her tears but her sobs had subsided. Every now and then she
would sniff but otherwise she just sat there in silence. Her fingers began to pluck the fabric.
“Better now?” His question was gentle.
Her head nodded against his shirt as she continued to sniff. “I don’t know what came over me. I’m so
embarrassed,” Dezarae said.
“Everyone needs to cry from time to time,” he offered.
“I ruined your shirt,” she chuckled, pushing away from his chest.
“Tears never ruined anything.” He brushed away the remaining few tears from her face with his
thumb.
“Make-up,” Dezarae joked.
“You don’t need make-up,” Jeb said honestly. “It would just hide your beauty from the world.”
With a wry smile she shook her head. “My make-up is car grease. I don’t dress up much here.” She
shrugged and made to move off his lap only to be stopped by his steely arms.
“Stay. I like holding you.”
Dezarae found herself melting back against him as her brain scolded her. Y
ou shouldn’t do this.
“Thank you for letting me cry on your shoulder,” she said as one hand began to trail up and down his arm,
sending electrical impulses through them both.
“You don’t need to thank me, Dez. I’m glad I could help. None of this changes how we feel towards
one another, though.”
Reality. “We aren’t going to do anything,” she said as her face snuggled into the curve of his neck.
Inhaling, she smelled a purely masculine scent and it made her tremble all over again.
“And we are denying this mutual attraction because of something that may or may not be?” he asked
as his hand began to tease the hem of her shirt.
“Yes. That and I am still hungry.” Her stomach growled at that moment, agreeing with her statement.
“Well, Firebird. Let’s go eat, then.” Jeb placed a light kiss on the top of her head before she left his
lap and soon they were back in the kitchen finishing up their dinners.
23
CONNELLY’S FLAME
Aliyah Burke
It was a long debate between them but finally Dezarae won. She would be sleeping on the couch
quite comfortably while her handsome guest was in her bed. Before they went their separate ways for the
night, he hadn’t pushed her to giving in to what they both wanted.
As he stood in the doorway bidding her goodnight, his eyes burned with a passion that she knew
would affect her like no other ever had. The decision was hers, he wanted her but it was her call. When she
said goodnight and backed away from him, he smiled a smile that should have warned her he wasn’t giving
up on her, just allowing her this victory tonight. He gave her a small nod and walked into the bedroom
without a second look at her.
So now she was lying on her comfy couch, unable to sleep, images of the man who had crashed into
her life floating around her mind. His body that was full of muscles, all of them hard and honed, those
beautiful gray eyes that saw more than she wanted him to. He was a beautiful work of art.
“Beautiful,” she muttered to the dark as she pulled her blankets up higher and tried to fall back
asleep.
****
the slim brunette gently.
Those big brown eyes glistened with tears as her arms slid around his neck and returned the kiss.
“Bye,” she whispered in his ear.
“I love you, Charmane.” One more kiss and he was off running towards the van that had arrived to
pick him up.
“Love you, too.” The feminine yell reached him as the door was slammed shut behind him.
****
glow filled the floral room he realized it had been a dream. A memory, really.
“Who is Charmane?” Dezarae asked from the doorway, her features emblazoned with worry.
“I don’t know,” Jeb swore, as he couldn’t even see her anymore, couldn’t recall her.
“Must be someone important to you. You’ve been calling for her a while now.” She entered the room
and walked towards the bed.
“I don’t know who she is,” he shouted as his frustration spilled over.
Determined not to flinch, Dezarae sat beside him on the bed. “Don’t push it; you are getting your
memory back.” She tried to offer comfort.
Dragging a hand through his hair, he flopped back on the bed. “I feel helpless. I feel fucking
helpless!”
Unsure of what to say to that, Dezarae grabbed his hand and laced their fingers, giving silent support
but not stopping him from ranting. Immediately calmer from her touch, Jeb tugged her back on the bed to lie
beside him.
He placed her head on his right shoulder, her thick hair tickling his skin. The hand that she held he
placed over his heart and the tattoo. He put her hand over it, palm down, and then covered both with his
hand.
“I hate feeling like this,” he admitted.
“I kinda figured that one out myself there, Johnny Reb,” she said, smiling softly.
“What are the chances of pursuing those feelings now?” His right hand rubbed her back.
“About as good as the snow being gone when we wake up.”
Especially now after hearing you call
for Charmane.
“That’s what I thought.” He paused for a moment. “Will you stay with me?”
“Yes, I’ll stay,” she said immediately.
“Thank you,” he whispered, as he jerked the covers up and turned off the bedside light.
They both slept easier for the remainder of the night. Nightmares were held at bay; memories kept
their distance, allowing them both to find the rest they needed. When morning arrived they were still in the
same positions as when they fell asleep.
24
CONNELLY’S FLAME
Aliyah Burke
Jeb woke first and lay there content to watch her sleep. Her breathing was deep, even, and soothing.
Those thick lashes of hers rested against her dark skin. Moving his head, he looked at the difference in their
skin color.
With the hand that was on top of hers, he inserted his fingers between hers. Dark, light, dark, light.
They made a stunning combination. It was beautiful. She was beautiful.
Lifting her hand, he stared at her fingers. The nails were short but clean. No polish or shine on them.
Natural. Her hands were strong from working on cars her whole life. He ran his thumb over the calluses he
had felt when her hand had rested on his chest.
“You deserve a pampered life, Dezarae. You shouldn’t have to work this hard,” Jeb spoke softly to
the room.
“I like the work; it relaxes me, but thanks for saying that anyway.” Her voice, husky with sleep,
answered him.
“What are you doing awake?” he asked as he moved back a bit to be able to look her in the eyes.
“I need to get up, shower, and get ready to go to town.” She blushed as she realized they were still in
bed together.
“You are very adorable when you blush, Firebird, very adorable.” Jeb wanted to kiss her so much but
settled to touch the tip of her nose instead.
“I need to get going,” she muttered and left the bed without a backwards glance.
Two hours later Dezarae led the way into her garage. It was time to go to town.
A low whistle left Jeb’s mouth as he took in the other car in her garage besides her beat-up Land
Rover. “Wow. Whose is this one?” His strides took him over to the vehicle that gleamed like a black pearl.
“That? That’s my baby. It’s a—”
“This is a ’67 Shelby Mustang GT500.” He stuck his head in the open window. “Four speed manual,
V8 engine, I’d bet with two Holley four-barrel carburetors.” His gray eyes were wide as he walked around
the car in awe.
“Would you like me to leave you alone with him?” Dezarae asked, amazed he had known what kind
of car it was.
“Him? Hell, no, a car like this is a woman, needs a soft touch.” He was practically drooling.
“Look buster, this is a him. Okay. My car, my sex.”
His head shot up to meet her eyes. “Yours? This is yours?”
“Yes. Go ahead and sit in it if you want.” She hadn’t even finished offering before his large body